My Super Sex Cruise, Bitches! Ep. 01

My Super Sex Cruise, Bitches! Ep. 1

By : DickThePimp

Episode 01 : It's Time To Cruise, Bitches! WOO-HOO!

Somewhere off the coast of Malibu...

"KATHIE LEE... KATHIE LEE... KATHIE LEE!!!"

"HOMER... HOMER... HOMER!!!"

"WOW, BABE. HOMER'S REALLY LAYING HIS DICK IN THERE."

I nod with a grin.

"HODA... HODA... HODA!!!" Hoda Kotb pumps her fists in the air, playing along with the extremely raucous crowd.

It's loud as fuck, and I'm loving it.

"SUCK THOSE NUTS... SUCK THOSE NUTS... SUCK THOSE NUTS!!!"

Kim and I laugh at that one.

"D'OH... D'OH... D'OH!!!"

Gotta love the crowd.

Homer grabs the mic. "WOO-HOO, BITCHES!!!" He throws his fist up in the air, much like he's throwing his huge yellow cock up Kathie Lee Gifford's world famous ass. Hoda sloppily sucking his huge nuts while he does. It's party time on the, It's My Super Sex Cruise, Bitches! Cruise ship.

Homer Simpson... yep... Homer freaking Simpson... laying on the deck by the pool, Kathie Lee Gifford on top of him, reverse cowgirl, taking 12 inches of fat yellow dick straight up her candy ass!... And lovin' it.

"FUCK MY ASS, YOU BIG DICKED YELLOW BASTARD!!! GOD!!! FUCK MY ASSSSSSSSS!!!!! YEAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!" Kathie Lee's enjoyment increasing by the second.

She's squirted three times already, splashing Hoda's sweet smiling, caramel face so much, she's wearing a milky white pussy jizz face mask. It's still dripping all over the deck. Hoda's slurping away on those fat yellow nuts, laying on her stomach in front of Homer and Kathie Lee. Fans surrounding them, very loudly and wildly cheering them on, flashing dicks and titties, shooting Duff beer... Homer's preferred brand... all over all three as they ass fuck the day away on the cruise ship.

Kathie Lee's bare titties are soaked with beer. Kim walks over and squats beside her, licking them clean as more beer shoots in their direction. The fans erupt even more at the sight of Kim Kardashian licking Kathie Lee Gifford's gorgeous, beer soaked rack as she gets ass plowed by the king of animated comedy.

Everything's being filmed for the My World super site. We're filming the whole cruise for it. Camera peeps all over the ship.

Homer grabs the mic again. He's grunting big time. "WHEW! I'M CUMMING, YOU NASTY, BITCHES! WOO-HOO!... D'OH!" Homer drops the mic when he bangs his big yellow head on the deck.

"CUM... CUM... CUM... CUM, YOU FREAKY YELLOW, BITCH!!!"

Another laugh from me. Great crowd.

Homer starts jizzing up Kathie Lee's ravaged rump, then Hoda pulls it out of there, yellow sperm flying everywhere. Like an animated comedy firehouse let loose.

Hoda frantically sucks it in, so eagerly sucking down the rest of Homer's mighty yellow load. He lays his head back on the deck, tongue hanging out of his open mouth, drool racing down his tongue. He's exhausted. Hoda bobs on that huge yellow cock while Kim and Kathie Lee kiss, shaking the beer from Kathie Lee's tits. Kim gropes those wet jugs while they kiss... and Homer just falls asleep.

Someone pours a Duff beer on Homer and he wakes up. "MORE DUFFBEER FOR EVERYONE! IT'S THE BEST BEER ON EARTH!" Homer's a spokesman I think. Someone tosses him a Duff beer and he pops it open, drinking away. "Ahhhhhhhh! Beer... the cause of... and the solution to... all of life's problems. WOO-HOO!!!" Homer holds his Duff beer up in the air. The crowd goes crazy, raucously cheering and chanting his name again.

We're off to a rousing start so far.

The crowd disperses. Some head to the pool. Some to the bar. Some to the concert hall for my sister Billie's (Billie Eilish) evening performance. Some down to the lower decks to go shopping or go bead collecting and fuck or flash some titties or dicks in any number of places... Mardi Gras Madness week on the boat. Most beads at the end of the week contest in effect. Winner gets 100 grand.

My sugar mama/girlfriend Kathie Lee Gifford walks over, wiping herself off with a towel. "Hey there, stud."

Some fans walk by and toss Kathie Lee some beads, cheering her on. She shakes her titties for 'em.

"Hey, gorgeous. Great fuck."

"Thanks, doll. I do enjoy big dicks... yellow or not." Kathie Lee winks at me all naughty as she cleans herself.

"And I enjoy you, love. Awesome body. Awesome rack." I check my bitch out. Still gorgeous, even at 68.

"Well thank you, stud. C'mon... let's go find someplace quiet." Kathie Lee grabs my hand and leads the way, tossing the towel to a worker. A nice kinky souvenir.

While my chick and I go get all relaxed someplace chill, my mom Kelly (Kelly Madison) is walking through the top deck indoor bar making sure everyone's fun is continuing.

"Hey there. Is everyone having a good time?" Mom asks some patrons sitting at the bar. These ones have clothes on.

"Sure."

"Yeah, absolutely."

"Oh my God, yes. I've gotten fucked three times already. That's more sex than I've had the rest of the year." A 50 plus housewive type blurts out, raising her mimosa to the rest of the bar for a cheers.

Mom laughs as everyone taps glasses and chants, "LET'S FUCK... LET'S FUCK..."

"Hey, doll. I've got a buttload of beads and let me see............ $400. Show your tits and they're yours." Some pretty drunk middle aged dude tells mom, showing her the money. The beads in his lap.

Mom grins. She's the boss on this cruise, but she's also got a naughty side to her... and she wouldn't mind getting her perfect hands on that 100K. She unbuttons her white business suit jacket and pulls up her black silk blouse, pulling her black satin bra off of her 34FFs... and flashes the dude. The greatest tits ever right there on full display for him to drool over. Super sexy grin thrown in.

His eyes almost pop outta his bobbing head. Dude may be almost drunk, but he can still tell absolutely perfect hooters when he sees them. He reaches out to grab them, but falls off of his stool to the floor, all groggy and liquored up.

Mama chuckles as the rest of the bar chants, "THANK YOU." She puts those insanely beautiful beauties away and grabs the dude's cash which he's still holding up in his fist. She also grabs the beads, leans over and smirks at the groggy dude too.

"Thanks. Nice doing business with you." She grins, then walks away. The bar patrons applauding her as she leaves.

In a quiet elevator...

"YES!!! OH MY GOD!!! FUCK MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!! FUCK!!!!!!!"

Kathie Lee grips the walls of the elevator like her legs are gripping my waist. I'm thrusting up into her, my cock so hard and so excited, thumping away inside that smooth honey hole as I fuck my woman, banging her against the elevator wall every single mighty thrust up into her pussy. We kiss, tongues fucking wildly, spit flowing freely, her gorgeous cans rubbing all up on my chest.

Fellow passengers come on to the elevator and watch us as we go from floor to floor, cheering us on, taking pics and filming us fucking. A couple of horny dudes grope Kathie Lee's beautiful, sweaty body while I feverishly ram up into her mature twat, my cock raging hard and getting close to blast off. I just grin. Public sex with my bitch. She loves it. I love it... We all love it. The, "CUM CUM CUM CUM!" Chants ring out in the elevator.

Kathie Lee squirts all over my thumping rod, super soaking it silly with all that honey sweet pussy milk as stranger's hands grope her tits, my cock furiously fucking her non stop as fast as I can.

We kiss again so passionately as I finally shoot my mighty wad of jizz milk, pumping it full force up Kathie Lee Gifford's quaking pussy. A raucous cheer erupting in the elevator when I cum. Kathie Lee and I laugh, smiling and lip licking heatedly. I kiss my woman nice and deep, so turned on by her and by our appreciative crowd. Kathie Lee sucks off my tongue perfectly, completely draining the saliva from it like she does the cum and piss from my cock.

She very lustfully drops to her knees, such a slutty smirk on her lips, devouring my cum glazed meat with intensely lusty cum drinking desire. That tongue swiping across my rod as she sucks me deep, bobbing her head on my fat dick, swinging her head around wildly as she does. Those gorgeous eyes locked on mine, a very horny sparkle gleaming from them right up at me.

I just lean against the elevator back wall and grin while my beautiful bitch gleefully sucks me totally dry. I'm marrying this mature slut asap. Might knock her up too. 68 years old or not. Fuck biology. I'll get her sexy ass pregnant. I got the super sperm shake that make the ladies quake. Knockin' bitches up, yeah... that's what's up. Boo yah!

The top deck pool is all crazy. A nude volleyball tourney underway. Winning team gets 25K. We've got an indoor pool on one of the lower decks, but that's usually reserved for some sorta secret sex parties. The top deck one is massive. Onlookers drinking and cheering on all the nude, horny players. Dancing everywhere. Peeps fucking and sucking, pissing all over each other. Plenty of beads exchanging hands left and right. It's gonna be a close competition for the 100K, looks like.

Players fucking around in the pool while they play. Always gotta make time to squeeze some titties and ass and pussy, volleyball tourney or not. Dick stroking too. Fun for everyone. Awesome cruise so far.

Kim's in her office, looking over the itinerary for the evening. Things are going smoothly so far.

I head over to the medical center to say hey to my half sister Gina. She's a nurse. Big titty, real sexy one.

"Mitch... is the liquor holding up so far?"

"Ummm... yes, Kim. The bar manager's saying it's all selling well, and the stock is fine. No shortage foreseen, yet."

"Good. Things are looking real nice so far. James and Kelly will be so happy."

"Kim?"

"Yes, Mitch?"

"Ummm...."

"What is it, Mitch?"

"Ummm..."

"Hehehe. Don't be so nervous. You can ask me anything." Kim giggles at the shyness level of poor Mitch. He's my mom's assistant, but he also helps out Kim too.

"I probably shouldn't."

Kim puts the schedule down and sits in her desk chair, looking over at the fat and nerdy young assistant in the very loud Hawaiian shirt, with a very intrigued grin.

"Well... Go ahead. I'm a pretty open person. Hehe." She lightly, and so seductively, chews on the end of her pen as she notices Mitch getting more nervous by the second. Dude's pretty freaking shy.

"Well... I ummm... I mean... I..."

"Just spit it out, Mitch. It's fine." Kim tries to ease his fears. She rocks in the chair, now even more intrigued by his potential request.

"Ummm... is there any chance you could... Ummm..." Dude is extra nervous. He can barely look at my wife... and she's very, very easy to look at.

"Mitch... relax. It's fine. Just ask." Kim gives him a very comforting smile.

He nervously grins back. "Could you possibly flash me? I mean... I'll give you my beads." Mitch points at the beads around his neck. Everybody on the ship is wearing them, or carrying them around. Gotta be prepared at all times. Ha.

Kim giggles. She stands up and walks around her desk, sitting on the front of it. She's smiling and giggling at the fat, shy redhead's request. "Sure. Why were you so nervous to ask me. I'd love to flash you, Mitch." Kim pulls her bikini top away from her amazingly gorgeous, firm breasts. DD beauties so perky and smooth. Mitch gawks real hard at them, mouth wide open and all. Kim laughs. She shakes them for him and motions for him to come over. Mitch walks to her, his eyes so intensely glued to those DD Kardashian jugs.

Kim grabs his hands and places them on her breasts. "There. You get a free feel too. Hehehe." She sits there smiling, letting Mitch fondle her tits as much as he wants. He cups and squeezes Kim's breasts, almost scared to, but he plays with them while he stares a hole through them... absolutely wowed by their perfection. Mitch licks his lips at those eye popping hooters... then almost faints when Kim pulls her white thong away from her pussy, and flashes that to him as well. She giggles playfully, knowing full well how much she's turning shy Mitch on.

Kim even grabs one of Mitch's hands from her breasts and places it on her truly spectacular pussy. A very thin, dark landing strip topping it. Mitch swallows hard, breathing heavy as well. Kim rubs his face to calm him, but that only speeds up his breathing even more.

"Relax, Mitch. OK?" Kim grins very sweet and comforting at him. He nods, and slows his breathing a little.

Kim rubs Mitch's hand on her pussy while his other one plays with her big firm tit. She coos happily, blowing Mitch a real sexy kiss. He just grins, sweating and fiercely staring away.

Kim reaches over and rubs his bulge. It's real thick, making her coo even more. "Such a nice cock, Mitch."

"Ummm... Thanks."

"Hehehe. So nice. Mmmmmmmm." Kim rubs the bulge while Mitch nervously, but very, very happily, gropes her body.

"You know... I haven't really gotten any beads yet. I've been too busy to get them. Hmmmm... that 100 grand sounds really nice to me. Hmmmmmm.... But, I'm gonna need a lot of beads to win that. Hehe. How can I get so many? Hmmmmmm." Kim mischievously smirks at Mitch. She gently pushes him away from her, looks right into his nervously grinning, sweaty face, running her hands down his chest. Then... she drops to her knees, rubbing his bulge some more, licking her extra creamy brown lips up at him as she rubs that hefty bulge while Mitch so excitedly glares down at her.

She unzips his cargo shorts and pulls out his six and a half inch, very fat cock. It's so hard it jumps right in front of Kim's very turned on, extremely sexy smiling face.

"Mmmmmmm. Yummy." Kim licks the tip. She softly kisses it, smiling and giggling at Mitch as he sweats, then she opens up and sucks it in. Those super succulent brown lipstick covered lips glide so smoothly down that entire meaty rod. Mitch growls with delight. That makes Kim giggle again. She rubs his balls so soft as she sucks him off, bobbing slowly on that thick meat pipe, cooing blissfully as she does.

Kim deepthroats the whole fat sausage down her throat time after time as Mitch stands there trembling, groaning, his hand on Kim's head. Kim makes sure to lick all around the fat meat stick as she sucks it, gently tugging on his meaty balls as well.

"OH GOD!" Mitch grunts. Kim smiling as she feels the rush of gooey sperm shoot into her mouth. She smiles around Mitch's cock, still tugging on his balls as she rubs them. She drinks his thick cream, cooing happily as she goes, then deepthroats him again, letting Mitch shoot the rest right down her cum guzzling gullet. The rest is a lot. Mitch keeps cumming, his hand resting atop Kim's perfect head. She licks his balls as his deepthroated cock continues spewing sperm down her throat. Mitch grunting, open mouthed, his big belly rubbing on Kim's forehead.

"Mmmmmmmm. So yummy, Mitch. Yum yum. Hehe." Kim softly sucks Mitch dry, draining his dick and balls of any and all sperm in there.

"Oh... sorry." Mitch gets embarrassed when a few drops of piss dribble out of his cock and into Kim's mouth. She giggles around his fat cock and keeps sucking. She coos blissfully, really playing it up for dear ol' Mitch. He's a real nice guy and a real hard worker so Kim's trying to make his first cruise experience a very, very memorable one.

She reaches around his huge waist and squeezes his ass as she sucks Mitch clean. "Mmmmmmm. Nice ass. Hehehe." Kim giggles around that soft, but still thick meat in her mouth.

"Thanks." Mitch shyly grins. Dude needs to loosen up. Hopefully Kim and my mom together can help the poor guy along that path.

Were off and ready to rumble on the high seas. Stay tuned for episode 02... cumming all over you soon.

By : DickThePimp

I'm kinda full. I've been eating my sister's pussy through three really big orgasms. So much pussy cream. I've drank it all, sucking so ravenously on that neatly trimmed, brown haired twat, my tongue spastically darting around inside it, lapping away at every inch of slick pink folds it comes across.

My tongue's got a thick sheen of pussy nut on it and it tastes fabulous. My sis has some of the tastiest pussy jizz ever. I revel in it, smiling so wide with my face jammed all up in her sweet smelling coochie. Gina smiling back, giggling at me while she plays with my hair and rubs my sexually delighted face even more in that delicious snatch.

Were fooling around in an empty room. Nice comfy hospital bed. Gina's scrubs laying on the floor beside us. Her 36Ds hanging iver the op of her white and blue sports bra.

I move up her curvy body and kiss her, letting Gina taste herself. She moans happily, sucking my tongue free of any and all of her juices on it. I lick down to those gorgeous melons, kissing them, then emphatically sucking half of each, super smooth tit in my mouth, one at a time. God... I love those tits. There's just something about Gina's tits. I absolutely crave sucking on them.

I eagerly devour each tit, one at a time, for twenty minutes straight. She writhes contently on the bed, playing with my hair as I suck as hard as I can on as much of each tit as I can the whole awesome time. Big titty bliss, baby.

Down on the first level...

"WHAT'S YOUR FREAKING PROBLEM, IDIOT??

"What??? I'm just trying to keep the passengers happy."

"HAPPY??? UGH!!!!" My girl Max (2 Broke Girls/Kat Dennings) storms off from the front desk. My buddy Spence (The King Of Queens) can have that affect on peeps from time to time. Max is mad at him cause he was running around jerking off and pissing on some passengers... he's sorta drunk.

I mean, it is a sex cruise. And it's supposed to be kinky as fuck, so I can't really get too mad at him myself.