All Comments on 'Mystical Tattoo'

Great story. I wish there was a bit more sex, but the mind control was great.

Great story, sex was nice and I liked the morality of the main character. I half wish that Heidi could have become the contractor of Air after the death of Rasputin so that she too didnt need to worry about the winds of time

I enjoyed the story immensely. Also does L5R mean anything to you? If not ignore that question, otherwise nice references.

Please write more! You need to continue this story!!!!

Imaginative and well put together..thanx

Very well written story as far as plot line, mind control was great. If you developed the scenes more you could probably publish this

Good stuff. Long enough to make for a good story, but I wish you had actually gone longer. There's a good tale here and I'd definitely like to see it expanded. Maybe future adventures of the four of them getting settled and finding their places.

The dog thing kinda killed some of the vibe for me. While I don't have a problem with taking her soul, so to speak, a human trying to get around like a quadruped isn't sexy. Better to make her a devoted slave, all the while knowing who she is and what she did. Make her not really enjoy the captivity, but unable to resist the pleasure she gets from the degradation.

All told, I hope you continue writing. If this is any indication of what you can do, the future is looking good!

we need to meet joan and see if a new evil rises up

Not only sexy, but a well-written, entertaining venture! I will be rereading this for a long time! I tip my hat to you!

It is explicitly explained and demonstrated by Miyako that his power only affects other contractors temporarily for as long as he holds his commands in focus, so how is it he then goes on to make permanent changes to two of them anyway? Was he holding all the commands in focus the entire time? It certainly didn't seem that way.

However, it's a good story regardless.

I really enjoyed reading your story. Thank you for sharing it with us!

You should do more stories with Sheldon and gang to see where they go and who they hand out Justice to. Very Good Characters. Maybe he could let his Pet walk upright outdoors and on all fours indoors.

You are really devoted to literature and crossing and mixing cultures. It makes for very entertaining material. Do whatever you feel like when you write

Keep up the good work

Enjoyed your story. Would like to read a follow up. Keep writing - you have

interesting ideas.

I REALLY enjoyed the story, and think that you have the makings for an enjoyable book. I for one would love to read more. Thank you for writing this.

This is suppose to be a website for erotic stories. What I just read was a book about elements and a nerd who has too much power. A BOOK.

And for the critic that complained about no sex or something like that, our hero had sex with three females and one at the end asking for it, two females were going to have sex and it was implied earlier. Is that enough sex to satisfy you? This is much better than some of the strong BDSM stories on this site. Just because you cannot write a story, why pick other's to death?

what an Imbecile

very good story, hero did good ,but also made mistakes.not too over powerful,did go to the dark side at first,but went light side when he released the girls. could use a sequel where he meets joan,or if joan passed the dragon on.the Main Character seemed 3 dimensional.it did have about the right amount of sex,while sex in the stories are ok, part of the fun is the getting there. if the girl is nothing but a air headed bimbo,to me at least it leaves a bit to be desired.

thanks for the interesting story

I do wish you had kept him within the rules and limits that were so clearly established. I is always disappointing to read parameters set by the author that are then ignored or violated.

Thank you! It was refreshing to read a story that held the basic elements of boy wants girl(s) and wants to control them for sex... but still did it in a fun and creative environment. People may criticize you for it being unrealistic, but, it's fiction..why not take creative liberties?

C'mon man! Keep it going! Your work is the one that switches of my brain and lets me roam the world of fantasy and imagination, as I start reading your stories, I literally can't do anything until I finish it. Brilliant. That's the word I would use. Thank you.

P.s. Could you please continue the games of deceit. Love the way you paint the main character antagonist.

Keep it up!

I will admit that I was bored near the beginning but that's just me. This was very well written though some of the content was interesting. It's too short though. You have the potential to make a novel out of this, if you have the patience to do so I'd recommend it. Well done.

Maybe I'm just spoiled, but despite an interesting premise, this tale was pretty boring. There was almost zero real feeling the protagonist was ever at risk and no reason to like him. Certainly he wasn't as deplorable as most protagonists in mind control stories, but he wasn't that sympathetic either. There's just a lack of dramatic tension to the whole thing. He wins. He gets what he wants and sacrifices nothing in the end. Granted, it's head and shoulders above most of the dreck on lit, but it falls just a bit short of being a great story.

Certainly original, very well done and very yummy too! Thank you!

I loved the story for its lore, ups and downs, and the fact you didn’t make all the elementals women. I enjoyed the historical figures and that the protagonist had a conscience or a code despite having overpowered abilities. I’d say that was a good ending.

I couldn’t get into it. The protagonist did not seem to have any redeeming characteristics. I skimmed the last page, which seemed kind of interesting. But it seems like a simple power trip with little self realization. After reading the comments, I suspect the story redeemed itself more than Sheldon did. Perhaps he still has room to grow.

Was an overall good read had some bad moments but still good. A continuation would be good.

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