Nicki Knack Ch. 01

Alright, here's what happened. Or at least this how it all started.

First Spring came and I told the family that I would make the drive to the summer cabin and open it up during late March for the season. The cabin has aged, but the opening checklist is quite manageable and I had no fear of chipping a fake nail.

But before that, I had met someone, or should I say someone approached me, so I came up with the bright idea to invite Adam to the cabin with for the weekend. I'm not saying that he was ready to spend a weekend with a cross dresser, but as I said, he approached me, so that was a little exciting and the cabin offered us a lot of privacy. Also, it's quite secluded, so one could hear me scream if Adam really didn't want to spend the weekend with a boy in female clothing after all.

Well, in between all that, there was the asking of such a major, um, weekend date? I was in no position to have a weekend love fest and I didn't think that Adam was either, but everything starts at ground zero, right? Well, all up in the middle of all that, I decided to ask him in person as opposed to the world-wide acceptance of relationship by text.

But I was still nervous, so I picked the Thursday before my planned departure to launch my face-to-face rejection plan and took my friend, Ben, as my support and backup.

So, here was the plan. Adam worked at the Comic Book store uptown and it just so happened that my favorite Java shop was almost across the street, so that sounds perfect, right? Have a coffee, stalk the Comic Book store through the Java shop windows to make sure he was there and spring into action, easy, right?

Well, we all know life is not that way.

But, before I go on, let me make it perfectly clear that meeting up with Ben at the Java shop was not a secret meeting, even though he insisted on wearing a trench coat, a hat and sun glasses. I say again, no matter how many times Ben swipes his finger across his nose as we stalked the Comic Book store, it was not a secret meeting. Also, I think Ben had pants on under his trench coat, but I had no interest in verifying that.

Also, I probably shouldn't have listened to Ben from beginning and that's about all I have to say about that. And that's my way of saying, snap, Adam's sister manages the Comic Book and that might be a confrontation that I was not ready for.

"So, Ben, what do you think? I think Adam is at the store."

"High is the ocean tide when the gray wolves hide."

"Ooh, la, la, high rise blue Denim jeans and a grey hoodie. That's me, right?"

"To protect her brother, she must be his dark sister."

"I know, I'm worried about Darci too. I think she's a little goth."

"Be it blonde, be it sweet, take a stroll across the street."

"Alright, I guess it's now or never. Lydia, cash us out when you have a moment, please?"

"Let the breeze be your brush to show the split of color seams."

Alright, fine, it was a secret meeting from Ben's point of view, but he had some pretty good advice, didn't he?

"You called Nicki Knack? You cashing out sissy babe? And if you are, make sure you take your weirdo friend in the trench coat, hat and sunglasses with you. I mean, what is this? A secret meeting?"

LOL, like Ben was going to let that go.

"The tip is as the trash talk topples."

"Not now, Ben. Lydia, would you please make me two coffees to go?"

"Will do Nicki Knack and I know just how you like them. Double-Double, Double-Double and a touch of Double-Double. Coming up."

"Wait, um, I need one of them to be a normal cream and sugar. It's for Darci across the street at the Comic Book store."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, and what I mean by that is whoa, whoa, whoa! Are you trying to walk on both sides of the street? I mean, come on, Darci and you?"

"No, no, I just need to talk to her, you know, from my side of the street. Plus, I may need one more thing."

"Yeah, and just what's my tip looking like today? Thick or fat?"

"Fat, if you can do one thing for me with Darci's cup. Um, Ben, what did you say in secret code?"

"Let the breeze be your brush to show the split of color seams."

"Did you get that Lydia?"

"One set of juicy red lip prints on the side of Darci's cup coming up, but you just make sure she knows her made her sweet blonde java and good luck with whatever stupid plan you're trying to pull off, Nicki Knack. I mean, it's you, so it must be a stupid plan, right?"

"Ugh, not now, Ben!"

"Share with thee and I share with thy, if I must be I, then I will be I."

"Fine spy freak, you can have my number, but you remember to give Darci my best. And delete those photos you took of me, after you forward them to me, of course."

Hey, I was off to a good start, right? All I had to do was to make my stroll across the street without getting hit by a car or bleeding in general, right?

"Ah, excuse me, ah, Darci, hello, um, this coffee is for you. So, is Adam here? I would like to speak with him while you're distracted with this wonderful blonde and sweet coffee. Like distracted way over there where you can't hear Adam and I talking."

"Hmmm, nobody brings me a coffee to Comic Book store unless they want something, so who are you working for, the FBI? And mind you that my cashier flunky, snot nose Ricky, has had to mop up blood from the floor in past. Hey, wait a minute, these lips prints aren't your shade of lip gloss, so just what the hell is going on here, Nicki Knack? And by the way, your freaky little secret spy friend better have pants on under his trench coat."

"OMG, Ben, no, not now!"

"The apple showed us gravity, but the pair defied it."

"(From the peanut gallery known as the flunky snot nose Ricky) Ooh, la, la, boss lady Miss D, ooh, la, la!"

"What? Snot nose, did you understand that? What the ooh la, la did that freak just say to me?"

"(Snot nose Ricky from the peanut gallery) You have a nice ooh, la, la ass boss and your tits ooh, la, la defy gravity!"

"Well, um, well, I never, um, well, um Nicki Knack, I mean, ooh, la, la, I guess. So, Nicki Knack, you were, um, saying? And, snot nose, be respectful and refer to them as boobs. Anyways Nicki Knack, Adam is out on an order run, so speak your piece and here spy freak, you can have my phone number."

"Alright, well, I've been talking and texting with your brother Adam and I have been tasked with opening the family cabin this weekend and it involves a list of things to do like electric, water and propane and it seems like a nice way to spend a quiet weekend with Adam and I promise I will wear high rise jeans all weekend and a grey hoodie which I will keep zipped up all weekend and I promise to not touch anything, not that I know how to touch anything and we have a small bonfire, we will sit on opposite sides of the fire and the cabin has two bedrooms and a pullout couch, so Adam can sleep where ever he wants to and not only have I never done anything, I wouldn't know how to do anything and the lip prints are courtesy of Lydia from the Java shop (breathing heavily)."

"First of all, whoa, and second of all, damn, that Lydia still wants to slap my ass around a little, doesn't she? Anyways, have you talked to Adam about this yet? Also, did Lydia say anything else?"

"Ah, Ben???"

"To be the girl is all the girl needs to be."

"Hmmm, I'll have to text Lydia in a minute. So, what do you want from me sissy?"

"It's a courtesy to you Darci to speak of my intentions, but I'm still going to talk to him no matter what, even though your approval would be nice."

"Oh, so you didn't cut off your balls, huh Nicki Knack?"

"Please don't punch me in the face three times. Ah, Ben???"

"All good byes follow shapely thighs."

"BEN!"

"Oops, the purpose is peaceful, so share and not."

"Oh, so I get to tag along on this peaceful and quiet weekend of fun between you and my brother? And I get to invite Lydia too? Did I get that right, snot nose Ricky?"

"(that guy behind the counter) pretty close boss. Keep your business in your own bedroom."

"Oh, well, with only two bedrooms and one pullout couch, well, it might be uncomfortable for you or for me or for Lydia or most probably for Adam. I mean, having breakfast together on Saturday morning, right"

"What's the difference if we're all just sitting around the freshly opened cabin and you know, NOT touching or DOING anything? I mean, what would the two of you do without a boat or a dock? Sit on the pullout couch and you know TALK?"

Snap!

"Whew, Darci, I didn't expect this to be so hard. I just came in here to talk to Adam about this."

"High rise jeans, you say?"

"And suspenders if that helps. Well, unless you cut people who wear high rise jeans and suspenders."

"Nicki Knack, it's probably none of my business what my brother does, but I want your number, your GPS info, your license plate number and I want another coffee tomorrow evening before the two of you leave. Also, Adam was always chilled at night, so make sure he has an extra blanket and by that, I mean your jammies are more of a onesie than Moulin Rouge, right?"

"Um, a onesie with suspenders, unless you cut people who wear a onesie with suspenders."

"Now, what else does your freaky little spy friend have to say?"

"Going the way of 3 is the way to go."

"Snot nose????"

"(Peanut gallery snot nose Ricky) a double date of sorts, boss, but with three people. You, Lydia and him and he has a 3-bedroom house."

"Picture this, then picture that, but show it not."

"(Peanut gallery snot nose Ricky) with video and no faces, boss lady Miss D."

"Ugh! Show me not from behind the veil."

"(Snot nose Ricky again) sorry boss, faces behind sheer veil type masks to mess with the lurkers who download the action for black mail purposes. Boss, also, um, I'll be in the bathroom for a while."

Oh, they were still trading secret code when I wandered to the back of the Comic Book because I heard those huge roller doors going up and it had to be Adam.

"Oh, ah, Nicki Knack, what are you doing here?"

"Adam, I'm going to the family cabin tomorrow evening to open it up for the season and I came to ask you if you would like to go with me and help me with the cabin opening checklist and stuff. We can come home Saturday or stay until Sunday morning and if this is too much for you, well, you can decline and I won't hold that against you."

"Holy snap, keep your voice down! Do you want my sister to cut you?"

"Too late for that. I have a bandage on under my onesie. Anyways, I was planning on leaving around 4pm tomorrow, if you're interested."

"So, it takes the entire weekend to open the cabin?"

"No, the checklist takes less then 30 minutes, but we'll have to run into town for stuff to eat and drink."

LOL, I think he was too afraid to confirm with his protective sister close by, but Ben and I left the Comic Book store on a high note.

"He didn't exactly say "yes", but I think I need to get home and finish packing. So, did you get Darci's number, Ben?"

"The dial of a clock is as the dial of a watch."

"LOL, oh, I'm sure many lurkers will watch that! Oh, and be sure to send snot nose Ricky the link. He seemed nice. Just remember, they are both very fertile!

"Cover me softly, but protect me firmly."

"Well, if anyone knows about condoms, it would be you, Ben."

And I was off towards home to pack my best Moulin Rogue onesie and to stick my finger in the wall socket to style my hair.

End Nicki Knack 01