All Comments on 'Night at the Club'

The idea was good. But it feels like you've written this for somebody and you concantrated on that instead of good story telling.

I don't have a clear answer to that question, but reading your story, I'm sure that something makes the difference. Like someone said about pornography: "I can't define it, but I know it when I see it." Frankly, your writing is NOT erotic. I didn't even get an erection. Maybe a Literotica volunteer editor could help you or maybe you could read a book by a good author about how to write well. Good luck! Rick