All Comments on 'Nina's Night Visitor Ch. 01'

Unlike so many authors, SexyNina0171989 introduces her story carefully, with excellent character development and a slow build-up. A blazing drama, and full of emotion, this first chapter is compelling reading in what promises to be a great love story.

The first half of this was thoroughly depressing and read like a horror story, despite them all being at least 18 the behaviour was very similar to children pretending to be adults. I was appalled at just how long Rick’s gang treated her like crap. I don’t buy into the slut-shaming bullshit that is sadly STILL prevalent in western cultures (and beyond) women have every right to enjoy sex but she wasn’t getting anything out of that situation.

You would definitely benefit from an editor or at the very least a proof reader. The errors were a bit jarring which detracted from the narrative. I started to read part of the other half of the story but genuinely didn’t have the will power.

Best of luck with your writing.

Tess (uk)

Tess, this story is about how slut shaming is wrong and how backward thinking negatively affects young people's lives. It's more than you can handle because it's more than what you bargained for. This story is more than just a romantic erotica. You call it a horror story because it is, so busy making your own point that you totally missed the point.

Go find a more shallow pool to swim in.

People that don't mind a gritty realistic story about sexual freedoms and learning about one's self worth enjoy this story.

Tess, also if minor grammatical errors are "Jarring" for you perhaps it's your concentration and comprehension that is the problem. How can you honestly judge a story you didn't finish reading and had trouble understanding?

Perhaps you can show us something you wrote so we can better understand how to write story.