Nordberry Nosh

I looked at her. "I don't have any orders."

"Not yet. You will."

"Fine. Let's talk."

Wow.

For the next hour, Dani had mostly the guys together focused on how their mental abilities had changed and gotten better, or not changed. No one was worse off. They had better ideas, better memory, better creativity and linking between disconnected ideas to form metaphors and lessons-learned.

I was amazed. Even Alan, who wasn't (or, hadn't been) at all gifted, had been reading tons of books and remembering most of them in exacting detail.

Jeff, from Chorus, had been taking French, and said he'd bought a flashcard deck with 1000 French words, and then finished it with perfect clarity inside of 2 weeks.

At the end of the hour, Dani said, "Okay, guys. All men. Time's up. There's more women here, we're going to do them next, symptoms, etc. If you're here with a guy, go ahead, go home. Kevin?"

She leaned in and whispered to me very quietly. "I have an experiment, we _have_ to do this. Ready? Good. Have the men raise their hand, and have their date, for tonight, take that hand. Then, tell them, as of now, they're married. This is lifelong and they're happy and should be respectful and happy together."

I was aghast. "Isn't that their business?"

She smiled slyly, "There are only 8 guys here.They all came with their girlfriends already. If this is a temporary effect, or it doesn't work on them, no harm no foul, they'll laugh. If not, we'll have a data point - suggestibility. But, also, compatibility is an issue, for any future person either one dates."

I thought about that - and saw her point. She'd been really quiet talking very, very close to my ear in super-barely audible whispers. This would be a Really Really Really big deal, and a Life changing event for them.

What the heck.

I did as she asked, with the hand-raise thing, having the guys stand with their dates, hold hands with bent up arms. Looking around, I felt like a total imposter, trying to tell people to do things when I had no idea if I actually had any power or deserved any respect.

"Okay, now you've joined hands? Remember, I'm your mage, I have Power. Respect My Power." I didn't say it cheesy, I said it for-real, serious but as an order, Do This Thing. "Guys, girls? Turn. Face each other."

I waited, they did.

"Look each other in the eyes."

I waited and let the moment hang there. "Deep looks. Open your hearts with this look, get it? Right."

One more moment for tension.

"Got it? Okay. Guys, say your girl's name...

(they did)

"Ask your girl, 'Will you marry me'. Girls, say yes, and mean it."

The room erupted in a gasp and a few screams.

I glanced at Dani. Dani said, "They will, or they won't."

Lots of silence as, one by one, around the room, the guys faced the girls and asked... and the girls? ... They. Said. Yes.!!!!

Lots of crying started, and the ones that asked hugged and some watched the next, until all 8 had followed directions.

I picked up on the secondary reason to do this and knew I had to explain it, it would firm up their commitment.

Continuing, I said to them, "Right, couples: If this is right, and you ARE in fact smarter, you literally have zero chance of finding a person better matched to you, than the person you're marrying, right now. ZERO chance. You're smart, they're smart. You're young and good looking, so are they. You have similar history. You have similar understandings of the world - not equal, but similar - so THIS, it makes a TON of sense! There are literally 3 billion arranged marriages on this planet, and those make far less sense than your marriages."

They looked at me, almost all of them had tears in their eyes.

I paused for a long second for them to think, then said, "You have to keep this quiet, though. No going off and telling everyone right away. Get together, as a group - Alan? Yeah. Couples, you go to Alan's house right after this. Talk it over. Keep it quiet. This kind of thing attracts attention, and if you go off and blab and cry and yell and get ecstatic, the media swoops in, we're in a circus, and you Never Have a Normal LIfe, ever."

They nodded, looked at Alan, and he flashed a thumbs-up but with confused happy eyes, then looked and asked, "Uh... Now?"

I nodded and Dani and I traded a few words in whispers.

They'd stood and gotten some coats on.

As they were ready to go, I added, "I have two more suggestions. One. Sandbag your grades, starting immediately. No more A's. Solid B's, maybe some C's. You can be exceptional later. Too many geniuses is bad for publicity, too. Second, I mean, two - move away, random and distant - end of the school year, tomorrow morning, up to you. Move together. Be married in your hearts, right now, tonight. Be married by law, next week, over in Parry Sound, Espanola, one of those county seat towns."

They looked at each other, thinking. They were smart, they'd figure it out.

Inspired and utterly in a Massive Impulse Call (thinking of what Bee had said about her dream), "OH - yeah, one more thing: Make lots of happy babies. It's my ask, in exchange for the mental gifts. Like, twelve of them, each couple. They'll be my, sort of, nephews and nieces, distant, never seen, but I'll be happy they exist. You're all highly ethical people, patient, kind, you'll be excellent parents. Go, do good things, and be happy."

They were surprisingly quiet about that idea. I had no clue if they thought I was crazy or what. Still, they were nodding, and they each came up and gave me a big hug, and left.

Wow. Life changes.

One minute, at a party. Next minute, engaged.

After they took off, my basement room was only slightly less crowded, at least 30 or 40 girls there, only 7 of whom were "mine".

The party atmosphere and previously-delivered chinese food made for a free-wheeling time, and pretty soon Dani and a few others had their tops off as if it was no big deal.

There was only one other guy at the party that I knew of, and that was Dean (a guy who stood next to me in Chorus), but I didn't see him, and I did look after the tops started coming off.

Turns out, he was upstairs in the kitchen talking with Rita, who was watching this event from the sidelines even though she was definitely in the middle of a lot of it.

Rita and Dean had been standing at the top of the stairs when the whole get-married speech thing happened, so they congratulated the couples as they came up. After the second girl up the stairs introduced herself with the guy's last name, even more crying ensued.

I learned later that Dean and Rita had gone upstairs to Rita's room and started both kissing and talking in a way she called, 'frank'. With Rita, that was probably code for startlingly blunt questions that demanded a straight answer or she'd call you on it - I'd had that before. She had a way of getting the truth out of you, or at least she had that ability with me.

Tina got home soon after that, to find Jeff, the friend from Chorus I mentioned, just arriving and texting with someone on the sidewalk. He had heard it was supposed to be a quiet party, but there were so many cars there that it couldn't really be.

Of course, Tina showed him in, and they stood in the kitchen for a while until Dani came upstairs, topless, to get more lemonade. Jeff was apparently cordial and polite and kept his cool, looking carefully only at Dani's eyes.

Per Tina later, this impressed her greatly, so they got to talking about classes, but the noise was too much so they went upstairs and checked in with Rita.

Rita and Dean invited them into the room, and then spilled the beans about the marriage thing.

Tina was floored, but when Rita described the reason they were doing it, because they were so smart that they probably couldn't be with normal people again, Rita said it was obvious the wheels started spinning in Dean's eyes.

Dean turned to Tina and asked, "Well, It's not just me then. You're smart now, too? It sounded like it downstairs."

She laughed and said, "Dunno. Definitely far more than I used to be. I may not be wise, but I'm at least smarter."

Dean's eyes, at this answer, went narrow and considering, and he said, "As of about a month ago, I am, too. It's very odd. I can just remember everything, easily. Plus, I can read things once and just get it. I read a semester's worth of European history last weekend, and I remember all of it. Very odd."

Tina was nodding, as was Rita and Jeff.

Dean turned to Tina. "I think I'm good now. Tina, will you marry me?"

Tina burst out laughing, then realized... He Was Serious.

Dean took her hand, the other one being busy covering her mouth in gasping amazement, and got down on one knee, looking up at her, clear eyed and happy.

He said, "Look, I don't know you very well. I know you're Kevin's sister, and he's a righteous, standup guy. So, you have a good house, a good family. Your room is clean, I could see, so you're not a slob. You're smart, you already talked about ... well, you're smart. So. There are arranged marriages with less to go on, like Kevin said. This, I'm good with. Will you marry me, Tina Kopaire? Tonight?"

Tina looked at him, then at Rita. Rita's eyes were bugging and mouth wide open.

Looking back at Dean, Tina asked in a half-joking tone (Tina does this and sounds like she's joking but she absolutely isn't), "Will you change dirty diapers? Buy me a nice house? Respect me and Share Tasks?"

(I was floored at this being her criteria!)

He said. "Yes."

Tina said, "Well, then. Yes. I accept. I will marry you. But, not tonight. It would piss off my Mom to no end."

"Next Saturday?"

Rita piped in and explained how we'd talked and said that Everything had to be secret. Too many odd things were happening in town.

Tina corrected this, pulled Dean up and kissed him. Really, it was enthusiastic both ways (per Rita's later description). Dean replied, "Yes. Next Saturday. My house, though. This place is too crowded."

They all laughed and eyes were wide.

Rita and Jeff, their kissing and talking interrupted, went back to it.

The story, related later, was that Jeff proposed to Rita about an hour later, but they decided to not tell Mom until at least the morning.

For my part, I learned this later. I was busy eating, I was hungry and people had brought a lot of take-out.

Watching the party was fun, too. Dani and Mads (also naked, not just topless, carrying around a tray of small snack foods or a drinks bottle and refilling people's drinks, but the looks on faces weren't so much happy as concerned, like they were troubled about something.

Mads took me to my bedroom and gave me a blowjob (with all those people outside the door!). The odd thing was, instead of swallowing, she spat it into a small empty tumbler drinking glass she'd brought along. Even going so far as to squeeze from the base to the tip to force out any extra and get that in, she was happy, and I was happy.

Knocking on the door, she handed the glass out, and I knew something had been pre-arranged.

She came back to bed and lay with me for a few minutes. She wouldn't say what was going on.

We got dressed again, because I really wanted to know, and we came out to the "party" to find that most of the 41 people (I counted then) were reading a sheet of paper and talking in low tones.

Seeing me, Dani and Jo started whistling and got everyone to sit, and hand in their papers to a pile in the front.

"Kevin, have a seat."

"Yeah?"

"Jo," Dani said, "Take it."

Jo had everyone's attention, including mine, and I sat in a chair and waited.

"Kevin. Sometime near January 8th, six weeks ago, everyone here started having symptoms of an odd malady. We got headaches, sometimes intense ones, and abdominal cramps. Our ability to learn and memorize grew. We got physically stronger to the point of running better times than well-trained seniors at the peak of season."

This I mostly knew.

"The headaches increased in intensity. We had dreams of frightful intensity, full of just as much love and caring and warm happiness, like a slow-motion orgasm, even, might bring, but alternating with nightmares of bewildering fright."

Everyone was nodding around her, but this was the first I'd heard of the dreams problem.

"Four separate girls, I'm not telling who, had their symptoms drop to nothing shortly after having sex with their boyfriends. The symptoms - headaches primarily - returned but were dispelled again by either having sex again, or giving a blowjob in which they swallowed the ejaculate. All four were increasingly horny and the dreams, as they returned, ensured this would be discovered."

She cleared her throat, and walked over to get a set of poster boards from behind the couch. Kim turned the first one around.

"They each contacted me, knowing we were friends, and Madison, who they said smelled like you. Madison and I started making close observations of their symptoms and charting them."

Kim's chart just showed a graph with an HF on the left axis, and WN on the bottom. "Headache frequency, and Week Number. A steady rise shows if they are sexually satisfied at least once per week, they're okay. If not, problems."

I nodded, it made sense.

"Despite being on birth control pills, two of these women - our fellow seniors - discovered they were pregnant."

I expected a gasp from the room, but it didn't come. I had a feeling I was the last one to be informed in this rodeo.

"Your smell continued. It pervaded every room you were in at school. It's barely detectable by guys, we checked. Once exposed past a minimum level, those who smell it can detect if you've been in a room an hour or two later. This has tormented us to Great Extremes, because with that smell comes a certain knowledge that, deep in the most buried parts of ourselves, we are incredibly and with 100% saturation of our souls, in Love With You. It's not halfway. It's not controllable. Though we know there's some chemical reason for it, some artificial way that this is happening, it doesn't matter. We don't care that it's odd, we just FEEL."

I looked around, and they all looked at me, eyes wide, open, honest, hopeful, and at the same time, with a shadow of worry.

"Dani discovered that your ejaculate is different from the four girl's boyfriends. Yours gives even more expanded mental capacity. A week after swallowing it the first time, she wrote a math paper that - anonymously emailed to a professor at U Calgary - was reprinted in Proceedings of the Royal Society, in London, and has been making news. This is DANI. Your student."

Some of the girls murmured like they'd just learned this. Way big news to me, for sure.

"Jo and I, a week ago, had sex with you. This led to a bliss-filled state and we had trouble functioning, but kept it together enough to hide our odd situation from you. Shortly after that, we experienced an illness which has seemed to be related, but not determinative. Your sister Rita had the same illness, also has received great mental abilities, but has not had sex with you, nor does she apparently need to."

I sighed, "Thank God."

"Indeed, because your mother was affected, though we don't know by how much."

At this, Mom, who had been standing, around a corner where I couldn't see her, stepped out and held up her hand. She said, "True," and her smile at me and Kim was affectionate. She continued, "Kevin. You, and everyone should know something, and this is news to the group and really the first time I've told anyone besides your father. My ... need for Mr. Kopaire increased, and we had a reinvigorated private life. Your father and I are pregnant."

There were some gasps, and then some applause, big smiles all around.

She accepted them, but continued, "One more thing, though, and it is probably important. I appear to be growing younger. Hair that had been gray is coming in brown again. My skin is less wrinkled, and the pain I've had in my right knee has disappeared in the last week." With that, she stepped back, returning the floor to Kim.

"Thanks, Cathy."

"Love you, Kim."

"Love you, too."

"So here's the situation. Jo Dani Mads April Bee Julie Roo me, we've all had sex with you in the last week. We are all Significantly Better - no nightmares, only minor headaches but just for two of us and minor ones. So, we believe the solution to All the problems here, among all the girls that have classes with you at all, is some level of inoculation with your ejaculate."

There was murmuring and some noise, but no one said anything. It just sat there, in the room, like it was a normal thing to say.

"On the basis of a 'do no harm' philosophy, we're dividing the group into several parts. Some will get no exposure to you, some will get airborne only, some oral ingestion, and some will have sex with you. Additionally, we'll keep track of who has orgasms both with and without you. This data, Dani has promised to track, so we can know."

She looked at all the girls there. "We'll also need to have everyone track their cycles. We anticipate that some percentage of you will become pregnant, despite being on the pill. This is a blessing and - by my private poll - highly desired, by most of you - while others are deeply conflicted on the matter."

I was wondering something, and since she was stopping, I asked, "Uh... you said everyone in any of my classes? Is this affecting anyone else besides them?"

Dani stepped forward and said, "Most of them, and I have class rosters for each one you're in, tracking it all. We all know, anyone talks, the media swoops in, everyone has to bug out, move away and become anonymous, and maybe lose the ability to ever see you again. We've set up secure communications already. So, we're staying quiet, but... it's tough."

She sighed long and looked serious. The silence hung there a while.

"So, yeah, out of 238 girls in your classes, all but 4 of them are affected, and not the four I talked about, obviously."

I asked, looking over at Mads, "What was the deal with that glass?"

She'd been sitting, so she stood up so everyone could hear. "I collected a sample from Kevin just now. It has been divided into four parts, unequally by volume. These have been given to four girls here, volunteers, to drink. This will test the minimum amount required to stop the headache effects."

Everyone nodded, like this was a good idea. It did make sense.

Looking at me, she said, "Kev, one more thing. We double-checked, just to be sure, and we don't have any under-18's in any classes that you're in. We're kind of lucky that way, there were a few nontraditional students enrolled as part-time at Midvale but none of them are in any of your classes, they're mostly in a night vocational class."

I could nod, this was great, I'd kind of wondered.

She sat. Kim called over, "Mrs. Kopaire? We're going to get slightly indecent now, so you might want to go upstairs."

Mom stepped forwards again, "Dani warned me, Mads. Mr. Kopaire and I are going to spend the night at Jo's house, courtesy of her mother, as a 'mini-vacation'. It just might be _romantic_. Jo has volunteered her room, so, thank you kindly, again, Jo."

Jo held up her hand and beamed at being able to do a good thing.

Mom continued, "The only other people in the house are my daughters Rita and Tina, and they've been warned to expect... unusual things. So, you all are free to have your bacchanalia. If there's any problems, come over to Jo's, third house south, any time day or night. We'll be back here on Sunday night at 5."

Kim said, "Have a lovely time, Mrs. Kopaire! Congratulations so much!!!!"

Everyone clapped as Mom went upstairs.

Kim, for her part, started taking off her clothes, and narrated at the same time. "We start the party, sort of, now. Everyone, please write up a report of what you do, all sexual activity. We know, you've all had complete checkups, you turned those in, we have all that paperwork. So, have fun. But, if something odd happens, maybe that's related to our unusual situation, to anyone or yourself, talk to the musketeers and write it up via the usual channels."