Not a Chance in Hell

She leaned in for a kiss and was stunned when I recoiled. With a confused expression, she walked on in.

Holly, having heard the commotion, stood and walked over to see what was up. When Lee saw Holly she froze. Glaring back and forth between Holly and me, she spluttered guiltily, "Oh shit, sorry. I should have called. I didn't mean to interrupt."

Holly walked up, extending her arm. "Hi, I'm Holly. We were just talking about what to do for dinner. Weren't we, John?"

I nodded. "Yeah, we were going to go out."

Holly, with a mischievous grin, said, "Well, if whoever this is doesn't mind sharing... We could all have pizza."

"Oh sorry, Holly. This is my ex, Lee. Lee, this is Holly, my girlfriend."

Lee accepted Holly's hand and she said haltingly, "Nice to meet you, Holly. I didn't know John had a girlfriend."

Holly giggled coyly. "Well, it was a surprise to me, as well. That is the first time you have ever said, that John." She leaned in, placing a sweet kiss on my lips. "Thank you."

I shrugged. "It's true, I guess I haven't had the chance to say it before."

Lee placed the pizza on the counter and said, "I'll leave the pizza, and leave you to your night. Sorry for barging in, Holly."

Before I could say thanks. Holly said, "No way. You have to stay. You don't have to leave because of me. I would love to get to know you."

Lee sort of inquiringly peeked at me. "It's okay with me, but what about you, John; do you want me to stay?"

There was no way of extracting myself from that. Not without appearing churlish. "It's okay with me. I'll get plates."

Lee quickly jumped in. "No, let me get them. I know where everything is."

Holly gave me a confused look, but walked over to the table. I got a bottle of Shiraz and Lee carried plates and glasses.

We ate in silence until Lee asked, "How long have you two been a couple?"

Holly answered, "Oh about two months. Maybe a little more."

Lee looked uncomfortable and uncertain. "Are you living together? Or just dating?"

Holly giggled girlishly. "Oh, a little of both. I stay over a lot. I stay for weekends though."

Lee nodded. I blushed. God knows why.

Holly asked, "What about you, Lee, do you have a partner?"

Lee glanced quickly at me. "You haven't told her?"

I shook my head. "No, we haven't discussed our break up."

Holly, seeing the uncomfortable exchange, said, "Sorry, I didn't mean to pry."

Lee replied, "It's all right. I thought John may have told you. Yes, I have a partner."

Holly looked completely befuddled. Lee, seeing her expression, added, "That's the reason John and I divorced."

Holly's eyes boggled as she absorbed what Lee was saying. "Oh shit. I see. You met before you were divorced?"

Lee nodded. "Yes, something like that."

The food went down quickly, and the wine was hot on it's tail. I had to go and open a second. When I returned, Holly and Lee were leaning in closely, tittering and gossiping. When I returned, they both sat up quickly, looking guilty.

I dropped off the bottle as my phone rang. It was Steve, my boss. I excused myself from the table. Knowing Steve, it wasn't going to be a quick call. It actually took the best part of an hour. When I got back out to the living room, the girls were on the couch. Again they were sitting close together. chatting like old friends. There was laughter and giggling. When Holly spotted me, she said playfully, "Don't worry, we were just comparing notes. I have learned a lot tonight."

Lee, seeing the irritated expression on my face, stood up. "I might get going. I have imposed enough."

"Nonsense," Holly gushed. "It's been a real pleasure. You don't have to rush away."

"No, I need to go. I'm sorry for ruining your night, John."

She walked over and this time got her kiss. "Perhaps you could give me a call when you're free. I would like to catch up."

After she left, Holly and I cuddled together. "That was interesting. Lee is lovely. I can see why you loved her so much."

I didn't want to say anything. I knew if I did, I would come off looking like a chump.

"I don't want to pry, but Lee explained a little of what happened. That must have hurt?"

I shuddered a little. The embarrassment seeped out. "Yes, it was very painful. I never thought she would cheat. I thought she loved me."

"You weren't keen on the shared relationship then?"

Shocked, I asked. "What exactly did she tell you?"

Sheepishly, Holly mumbled, "She said that she wanted to start a polyamorous relationship with you and Rafe, but you refused. She had sex with Rafe, hoping it would be the foundation block. You, however, didn't like it and filed for divorce."

"Yeah, okay. That's pretty much how it went down. They both tried to convince me, but there was no way."

She gave me a sexy grin. "What if it had been another woman? Would you have felt the same way?"

I think I just about choked. "What, god I don't know."

Holly smiled, her lips grazing mine sensuously. "Wow, settle down. I was just asking. Some men like that idea."

I chuckled. "Sorry, it's still a bit of a sore point with me."

"Yes, I can see that. But you didn't answer my question."

"I guess, I'm like most men. Yes, the idea interests me."

She sniggered. "Good, I'm glad. I would have been worried if it didn't. Lee is a very sexy woman. Very sexual, I got a wonderful vibe from her."

We made love that night with a fiery fierce intensity that burned bright. Over the weekend, we talked a little, and Holly kept going back to Lee; she became a hot topic of conversation. Having your girlfriend talk about your ex wife is very unnerving.

In bed, it was even more distressing. Especially when Holly said, "John, if you wanted to include Lee. I would be open to it."

"You have to be kidding," I blurted out, exasperated.

With a gentle kiss, she replied. "No, I have had several female partners. I consider myself bisexual. Although, I have never been with a man and woman together. If it's something you would like to try. I'm game."

When I didn't respond, she added, "John, I got a great connection from Lee. I think it scared her, but I would like to try and build on that."

"As much as that intrigues me, no thanks. I'm not sure I want to reopen that door."

She smiled, a soft warm glowing warmth. "No problem, just letting you know I'm interested."

Lee called me Monday after work. The conversation started off like most. But from nowhere she gushed. "John, I have to say, I like Holly. She is very nice."

"Thanks, yeah, I like her as well."

There was a little hesitation before she added. "We had lunch together today."

"What, why? Jesus, Lee, why would you do that?"

"She invited me. I thought she must have told you. I wasn't until we were there I realised she didn't. Which is the reason I called. I don't want to create tension between you two."

"As always, it's a bit late for that. You must have known I wouldn't be comfortable with it."

"John, I thought you knew. It surprised me when she called."

Confused, I asked, "What did she want?"

"Don't freak out, it was just lunch, she wanted to talk, she wanted to know if we could be friends."

"And you said what?"

Again the pause. "I said I would like that. I like her. I won't see her again if you're uncomfortable with it."

"Good, the next time she calls, just say you're busy or something."

"John, she told me what you guys talked about."

"Jesus, Lee. Stay out of my life." I disconnected the phone feeling a wide raft of emotions: anger, frustration. I finally meet a woman I liked and there was Lee, hanging over it like the grim reaper. Holly as well; what the fuck was she thinking?"

It was Wednesday night before Holly turned up. "Hey, John." She lowered the armful of groceries down on the bench and came over for a kiss. The kiss was as succulent and juicy as always. She gave me a smile and walked into the kitchen. "Will sausages be okay for dinner?"

"Yeah, fine with me." I poured us a glass of wine and we chatted about work and life as she prepared the food. I wanted to ask, but kept my mouth shut. She never mentioned meeting Lee. Dinner came and went, we watched some TV, snuggled together, laughing at some dumb shitty comedy. Still nothing, and it started to make me feel weird, uneasy.

We went to bed, made love, slept, got up and went our separate ways in the morning, and she never mentioned it once. Over the next few days Lee called several times, but I ignored her calls and messages. I just wanted some space.

Friday night, Holly turned up. It was my turn to cook. Our greeting kiss was cooler than usual. No searing burning intensity.

It was her turn to keep me company as I cooked. As usual, we chatted about our days. Out of the blue she spat out, "I rang Lee yesterday to invite her to dinner, and she said you asked her not to talk to me. Is that right?"

At least it was out in the open now. "Yeah, actually I did ask her to stay out of my life. That includes yours, as well, while we are in a relationship."

Sipping her wine, a thoughtful expression covering her face. "Why is that necessary? I like her. I was hoping we could be friends."

"Why didn't you tell me you saw her on Monday?"

She shrugged. "It was none of your business. Look, John, we are in a relationship, but we aren't married. I am entitled to my own friends."

"Don't play games, Holly. She is my ex wife. I think that is unfair. I don't want her to know what's going on in my life. I have been trying to create some distance between us. I want space. I can't understand why you want to be friends with her."

"That's easy, I like her. I know she's your ex, and that may be weird for you, but I like her. We shared a connection and I wanted to investigate that in more depth."

Confused, I frowned. "What the hell does that mean? Investigate? Jesus, Holly."

"Okay, you want me to say it. I like her. I told you I'm bisexual. We shared something and I wanted to see if there was something there. Just because you don't want to sleep with her, doesn't mean I don't."

That floored me. I think my chin bounced off the floor as I sucked in a deep breath. "Holly, is that something you do, sleep with other people?"

"We haven't made promises to each other, John. I like you, I like you a lot. I feel deeply connected to you. If you're asking if I have slept with other people while we're together, the answer's no. If I was going to. I would tell you. If anything was going to happen between Lee and me, I would tell you first."

"So you think it's okay to sleep with other people while we're together?"

"Yes, if we haven't made promises to each other, then so long as we are honest with each other."

"So you would be all right with me having sex with other women?"

She nodded. "Yeah, so long as you tell me about it." Her face gave nothing away. "I'm not a hypocrite, John."

Dinner was quiet. We talked but it was awkward, the usual intimacy nowhere to be seen.

Over the weekend, it sort of levelled out. We talked a little more. Monday morning before leaving, she asked, "Is it going to be okay if I call Lee? Can I say that you're happy?"

"Holly, you're an adult. If you want to see her, then do so. I warn you though, I'm not happy about it."

"So you don't want me to see her?"

"I said do what you want. I won't stop you. I said I'm not happy, and I'll add that I'm not sure I can deal with it. If it happens, I guess we will deal with the consequences then."

She kissed me deeply. Her tongue swirling passionately around my mouth.

Holly stayed over a few nights during the week. There was no contact from Lee, and Holly never mentioned her name. The weekend was nice; Holly and I went up to Mangawhai Heads for a break. The weather was nice and we swam, ate out, shopped. One of those really nice weekends.

I didn't know whether Holly and Lee did meet up, I had to trust that she would tell me if something was going to happen. No, I have to say honestly, the thought of it scared the shit out of me. I was jealous as hell, angry that Lee was going to fuck up another relationship for me. Aside from that, images of Holly and Lee together, naked, kissing and making out, were accompanying me uncomfortably to sleep every night. As scary as it was, the erotic nature of my dreams left no room for argument. It aroused me more.

Holly was scheduled to come over Friday night. I did my grocery shopping and my usual housework. I liked the place to be tidy when she came over. Didn't want her to know how much of a slob I could be.

As I cooked dinner, my phone rang. "Hi, Holly, are you running late?"

"Yes, a little," she replied. "Look, John, there's something I need to tell you before I come over tonight."

"Okay, go for it." I whispered nervously.

"Okay, I promised I would tell you if anything was going to happen between Lee and me."

"Yes..."

"Well, we're going out tomorrow night. I wanted to tell you tonight, because I know you have concerns and may want to cancel tonight."

It was a shock. Yeah okay, I guess I sort of expected it. There had been a gnawing in my guts for the last week that I couldn't shake. "Thanks for being honest, Holly. I don't know what to say."

There was a pause, a long second-eating pause that felt like a dark force was feasting on my insides. Finally, her words broke through the silent wall. "I do have a suggestion."

"Go on."

"I told Lee we were getting together tonight. John, I would love to invite Lee, as well. The three of us could have dinner and see where it takes us."

"Are you saying what I think you're saying?"

"Yes, I like you; Lee and I have connected. I like her, I know you still love her, and I hope you at least like me. Where would be the harm in the three of us seeing if there is something more than friendship?"

My brain screamed out frantically "No!" My heart whispered "yes." My mouth, as dry as it was, said, "All right."

I heard her giggle. "You might get your fantasy."

"Yeah, or I'll get fucked over again."

She giggled. "See you in half an hour or so. Now that Lee is coming, I need to change, I know she will look incredible, and I don't want you thinking she's prettier."

They walked in together, arm in arm. They strode in as if they owned the place. Lee though, looked anxious. "Hi, John." I nodded, not knowing what the hell to do. The last time we spoke I ordered her to stay out of my life. Now here I was inviting her into my home, with my current girlfriend on her arm.

Holly, who was far more comfortable than either of us, walked straight in and slipped into my arms, planting the sexiest kiss on my lips. Her gorgeous body was caressing me through the flimsy layer of fabric that separated us. Her arms circled my head and held me tightly, her body weight swinging.

As we separated, I tried to gather my senses. Lee stood beside us, staring open mouthed. Was it arousal, or fear I saw in her face.

Holly stepped right over the opening abyss. "I think Lee would like a kiss, as well."

Lee sidled forward; it was slow, and she moved clumsily into my arms. Her breath tasted of minty freshness, her floral scent invaded my nostrils as she also slipped into my arms. Her hands caressed the cheeks of my arse as our mouths collided in a minty delight. The kiss was full of promise and intent. Her tongue swirling, dancing erotically. Our eyes closed. Our bodies joined.

We didn't so much as separate, as stagger apart. She obviously felt it as strongly as I did.

Holly whispered hoarsely, "Wow." She dived into Lee's arms and if our kiss was searing, this was explosive. Their bodies, so different, yet so perfect, melded into one entity and their mouths attached like limpets. Their cheeks swelled lewdly as their tongues battled.

They glided apart, their lithe bodies flowing. Lee was dressed in a spectacular flowing crimson opaque glittering dress, the bodice so low her swelling breasts overflowed, Holly, in a navy short tight fitting sequinned cocktail dress.

The ice, smashed more than broken, we moved properly into the house. The girls sat at the breakfast bar counter, drinking their wine as I cooked. They giggled and talked softly. If anybody suggested that this could ever happen I would have laughed in their face. But here we were, and as the night drew past it became easier. I don't know whether it was the drinks or the atmosphere. I felt it was electric and invigorating. The expectation was high.

When Holly attacked Lee on the couch, I was stunned. Lee was nervous, uncertain, but she was carried along by Holly's passion, her hunger. They became a single being as their clothes vanished slowly. I was nothing more than a spectator. My breathing ragged and shallow, my blood coursed through my veins like igniting rocket fuel. I was sure they must be able to see my heart trying to beat its way out of my chest cavity.

It was later in bed when we all joined. Nervous as shit, I was scared out of my skin. It didn't stop my cock from taking control. The lovemaking was hard to describe: earth shatteringly good, nerve wracking, swathed in anxiety and dismay. Lee was self-conscious and timid. Holly, the experienced one among us, led the way. Like a conductor, she directed and encouraged.

It was the singularly most incredible night of lovemaking of my life. Sleeping in a bed with two sensationally beautiful woman was difficult. I kept waking as bodies writhed and snuggled against and over me. If the night was awkward, the morning was worse. Lee looked embarrassed and uneasy. It was Holly, again, who led her through her disquiet. They showered together, giggling and laughing. We ate breakfast and Lee left to return home, leaving Holly and me to go about our day.

We decided on a trip to Piha, just to get out of the house. On the drive over there, Holly asked, "Well, what did you think? Did it live up to the fantasy?"

Giving her a sneaky grin, I replied, "It was more than I could ever have expected. Holly, you are an incredibly sensuous creature. You were incredible. If it wasn't for you, I'm not sure Lee would have gone through with it."

She giggled. "Yeah, she was nervous. I think she got over it."

That night was the first of many. Holly and I did still m

While we recovered from a spectacularly breathtaking night of lustful lovemaking, all three of us panting. Holly gushed, "Perhaps we should invite Rafe?"

"Like fuck." I snarled viciously. The words were out of my mouth before I could stop them. The look on Lee's face was pure horror.

Holly was a little more reserved. "Well, that didn't go down well."

Lee just stared at me, her expression hard to read. Surely she must have expected that?

It was a day or so later. Holly and I were at a restaurant having a nice quiet romantic dinner. "Why were you so adamant about Rafe not joining us?"

"Holly, he fucked up my marriage once. He is not destroying our relationship, as well. God, you don't know him. He is a fucking leach."

"Actually, John. I have met him. I have been taking his philosophy class."

"Oh for heavens sake. Why the hell did you do that?"

"Lee spoke so vociferously and enthusiastically about him. I wanted to find out for myself."

"And?"

"Well, I like him. He is definitely a character. A very passionate man. He speaks wonderfully and he articulates everything so clearly."

"You didn't say why you wanted to invite him."

"I just thought it would be a natural extension of what we have been enjoying. John, I have loved our time with Lee. She mentioned to me separately that she feels guilty for leaving Rafe at home alone. I just thought it made sense. There was no conspiracy. She didn't know I was going to suggest that."

"That's something. I got the impression that it was her behind it."

"No, babe, all me."

Strangely, Lee stopped coming over. Maybe it wasn't that strange. Holly seemed upset and tried to get her to open up. Their conversations happened away from me, because Lee wasn't talking to me. I guessed it was my refusal to allow Rafe to join us that was behind it.