All Comments on 'OMG! I'm Naked in School! Ch. 02: Carolyn'

It reads as though you skipped several chapters from your book. That made it difficult to get into this story.

Well written and a nice read but all the references to things we hadn’t read before, threw it. It feels as if this should have been chapter four.

. . . OMG! I'm Naked in School! is available on Amazon a2 https://www.amazon.com/OMG-Im-Naked-School-Millswan-ebook/dp/B077J5HTQH/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1518703201&sr=8-1&keywords=OMG%21+I%27m+Naked+in+School

I can see what he's doing here: he's pushing readers to buy the book. Well, perhaps, but it's my opinion that he would have done better at that by posting chapters sequentially, and then, after five chapters or so, told us that the rest is available only through Amazon. If the two chapters he has presented thus far are sequential, then I can't see it as being a very good book.

The Kindle version states that it's roughly 325 pages, so it's obvious that he did put a lot of work into this.

A good idea, very good but the story isn't hit enough. I hope next chapters will improve this aspect

She never been on a date, until she had to be naked in school. She must be a butter face.

I enjoyed the manner in which you explored Carolyn's feelings, hesitancy, occasional boldness and her all around feelings of being nude, as well as the interactions with others! Social nudity is, presently, a real privilege to experience because of the restricted opportunities to do it, but as I have found myself in being nude at Open House nudist resort events, the amazing sensation of being "allowed" to do everything nude is wonderful! Whether at a Tattoo and Arts festival with many people browsing the artists' works or watching people get tattoos, or decorating for a holiday party (with about 200 guests), I rejoiced in being clothing-free! Both times were a true joy to experience, and on another time I volunteered to cook and serve outdoors (BBQ and boiled corn on the cob) for 3 consecutive days, driving back each day, and it was the best fully-living experience I have ever had. Honestly. Other things in life feel great for 15 minutes, a couple hours, or something like that, but getting to enjoy simple nudity for 6 hours a day, 3 days in a row, was really grand! ~ This story comes pretty close to capturing a sense of that, and I appreciate the detail of allowing intensely private feelings to STILL happen behind closed doors; that's accurate too! Social nudity does not compromise or require any change in that level of intimacy at all.

I consider your previously posted stories gems that were among the very best that I have read here. The postings of this story were disappointing. They were in-artfully mashed together without consideration of continuity or coherence. Upon reading other comments, I understand what happened. But I think it was an insult to your readers and to the story.

After reading the sample provided here, I went to Amazon.com and downloaded all 18 chapters for $2.99. How Carolyn and her 17 other volunteer classmates overcame their fears, embarrassment, and humiliation is a fascinating story. Thank you, Mr. Millswan!

Why do you always have double hyphens? Back in the days of typewriters, a double hyphen signified a dash. Most computer systems now automatically change a double hyphen into a dash. In every instance in this story, a single hyphen is sufficient.

Why do so many of your quotations (where a character is speaking) end in a question mark even though it is a declarative sentence? In a few instances, the spoken words might be delivered in a questioning voice, but mostly not.

You went straight from the build-up to two weeks later, although Carolyn's feelings seemed to me to be more appropriate to the first week, even though the fictional study was not well structured.

From what I know of introductions to public nudity, Caroline should have been totally comfortable and confident with nudity by week 2, with only minor issues with having to deal with other's reactions. Mind you, in a more realistic scenario where the purpose was "to evolve and become enhanced in my own self--perception and learn that I am beautiful as a person and so much more than merely a naked body", the participants would have first spent a half to two days socialising naked among themselves, perhaps also with exercises to get them comfortable with publicly erect naked nipples or penises - this could have made for an interesting part story in itself.

At least your story showed how a nudity-friendly encounter and different perspective, as with the encounter with Darlene, could make a huge difference.

The car makeout scene was definitely hot.

It's always "breasts this" and "breasts that." But you never attach any kind of modifier to denote their size. You mention Darlene's being huge, you mentioned a girl in the bar having "flattish" breasts, so it's not anything against actually using size-indications when mentioning breasts. So, why does it feel like you're going conspiciously out of your way to explicitly avoid any mention how how large or small Carolyn's breasts are, when you mention them a lot anyway? It's actually making it harder to get invested in Carolyn's story and emotions because it feels like if I'm not allowed to know what this protagonist looks like, which is a problem when body positive nudism is supposed to be a main theme here. Like, I can't really relate to the nudist's body-positive message when there's no body to be positive about...

Taking a girl on a nude date is a fantastic fantasy. Now if he had just paid a little more attention to her naked ass, like giving her a little goosing as they walked back to her front porch.

WTF? I couldn't fully enjoy his chapter because there was such a glaring hole in your story. Why did you completely omit the follow-up to the introduction? Your story would be much more enjoyable if you had allowed your readers to understand the nature of the program and the initial reactions of the participants and their schoolmates. A part of your story when her family sees her naked for the first time and the scenes you vaguely referenced at a pool and the actions of some of her classmates would have also made your story more enjoyable. I'm baffled at your decision to just gloss over those parts and jump ahead to their date