by luvjuice43
about the time transitions - they were a bit unclear at times - and they're the only reason I'm giving the story 4 instead of the 5 it otherwise deserved.
Now that you've introduced us to these people, are we likely to hear of them?
That was a fun story with a nice wild night and a bit of a twist at the end. Worth at least 4 stars, but I give it 5 to make up for the a--hole who has nothing at all constructive to say and expresses himself so eloquently.
Again, I write for my benefit not yours. If you enjoy my stories Great if you don't move on to someone whose work you do enjoy. Life is too short to waste on criticism when you can be uplifted by a little praise.
Was made possible. Wouldn't ni.d if you enjoyed yourself...fuck that! Cheat and leave. No other option. If said stain had not been mine your ass would be down the road. Two stars.
There were several time-transitions that were not clearly demarcated (and at least one was just filler) and made the time-line more difficult to follow than necessary. Moving from the morning after the anniversity party to first date, then back to morning after, then to the party, then back to morning after was screwy! He didn't seem that wiped-out at party to end up with amnesia! I didn't think the 'first-date' recall developed the story in any significant way.
3*
Not a fan of drinking in the morning, but good anyway. And the right category. Duh.
Not the best way to spend your anniversary. But at least there was no cuckolding, at least not yet.