Out in the Black Ch. 18

"Matt," I pleaded. My breath hitched. "Matt!"

"I love you, Rusty" he murmured into my ear. "So much. I'm yours, totally and completely. Yours." As if his words had called something forth, I moved like a man possessed. My hands fastened on his hips in an iron grip and I slammed my pelvis up against him once, twice, and held as my dick swelled and I pumped my load deep into his guts. Then the rush of energy was gone and my ass dropped back to the bed. I lay there, gasping, feeling somewhat disconnected from my body. Matt collapsed over my chest. He managed to catch most of his weight on his hands, but enough landed on me to knock whatever breath I'd managed to catch back out. There was something that might have been pain in my ribs, but it couldn't break through my post-orgasm haze.

The results of our exertions mixed between our bodies, making Matt's skin slide over my own. I was wrecked. After one failed attempt to wrap my arms around him, I gave up and lay sprawled beneath the captain, my breath ruffling his hair. "Holy fuck," I groaned and felt him shake against me as he laughed. We stayed like that for a time, until my ribs refused to be ignored any longer. "Ouch," I said tonelessly.

"Sorry," he mumbled, pushing himself up on arms that still trembled. We both grimaced at the sticky noise as our torsos pulled apart. "We should probably clean up and get some sleep, huh?"

"So much for that shower."

Matt huffed a laugh and stood, only wobbling a little as he disappeared into the pisser, returning a second later with a damp towel. After getting us both relatively less gross, he curled against my side, my good arm wrapped around him as he planted soft kisses along my neck. "I know you just got settled back in," he said quietly.

"Hmm," I acknowledged sleepily.

"But what do you think about moving?"

That woke me up. "Kicking me out already?" I joked, wondering where he was going with this.

"Not even close." He traced his tongue up the side of my neck and gently closed his teeth on my earlobe, sending a shiver down my spine. "I thought maybe you could live with me."

Fucking what? I waited for the panic to hit. If ever a guy was going to run, this would surely be the time. Instead of freaking out, my brain offered up a slideshow of the last half a quarter: Matt staying with me in the hospital, contorting himself into that tiny bed with broken ribs. All of the nights where we sought one another out for companionship even when we weren't fucking. How miserable I'd been those nights he'd stayed on Vegas. The truth was, I liked sharing a bed with the guy and preferred having him around when I woke up. I'd been alone for so long, convincing myself that's what I wanted, but the thought of going back to that after having this made me feel empty. Still...

"Are you serious?" I asked. "What about - aren't you worried what the crew will think?" I levered myself up on my elbows, wincing as strained muscles protested, but I needed to see his face. Ever since the first time after Earth, he had been cautious, sneaking around and trying to keep the crew from knowing we were fucking. And now he wanted to live together?

The captain gave a half shrug and reached his hand up, smoothing a thumb across my cheekbone. "The crew can deal. Or find a different ship." I stared down into those impossibly blue eyes and they gazed calmly back at me. He meant it. "Life is too short to keep trying to pretend I'm not madly in love with you."

Now that was just cheating. But he had a point. Almost getting blown up put a lot of things in perspective. "In that case," I murmured, and leaned down to kiss him. Thoroughly. Fucking hell, Kells was going to give me no end of shit.

"Is that a yes?" he gasped when we broke for air. I smiled at him and moved to take possession of his mouth once again. "I'm going to take that as a yes," he mumbled into the kiss.