All Comments on 'Partings Pt. 01'

....understand any of that really, disjointed words and phrases meant absolutely nothing.

I’ll try dis one afta a fat Spliff, maybe I’ll digg it, mon

It’s like you strung random words together, threw in some verbs, nouns and adjectives and called it a story.

Whatever it is, don’t finish it. Just delete it and pretend it never happened.

What?

I'm confused and don't get what this was.

Well, that was different. It was not an easy read, but an enjoyable one, if the reader applies themselves.

was lost early. First, to begin, in which country are your characters living and in which year? I have more questions after those. We simply cannot read your mind. You have to choose the right words to help us follow you.

Don't give up your day job! This made no sense whatsoever! "National Service"??? Explain it. If the MC had already served why would he be required to do it again? Again, the story made no sense - was a short read but a waste of time!

I had to read it several times, because it made me think. The story is set in the not too distant future where unemployment is not allowed for younger people they must perform menial tasks under the aegis of a National Service Scheme, even if they are married.

Folks, if you don't understand the story, read it a couple of times and you might have a different view of this first story.

lesson 1. When writing for an American readership you need to explain the lingo.

National service is a very British and Brit Colonial expression, as are a lot of other expressions you used.

2. You have been a member for a lot of years, so have obviously read a lot of stories and should have known that LW is not to be taken so frivolously.

Hope you enjoyed been burnt at the stake.

Reads like one of these futuristic scenarios where people are just economic units of production, deployed at the direction of an authoritarian government in a culture that embraces oppression and abdication of the self for the "greater good" myth.

Darwinism applies to cultures and governments as well as individuals. The mistake this couple made is not escaping when they had the chance. Not all the Jews died in Nazi death camps, only the slow witted ones, and their cursed children.

Thanks for the effort. I suspect those who can understand it really appreciated it.

On diction, Partings is set in a possible future where induction into a National Service is presented as a panacea for social ills. Mandatory National Service including assignment to humanitarian projects was suggested in the US by both Obama and Clinton. Will one day it get enacted?

Prior to 9 - 11, I would never have expected the type of restrictions US folk face everyday and the near schizophrenia that accompanies the so - called War on Terror . And no one could have expected various governors in the Corona Virus epidemic to rule by decree. That's called the new normal.

But the US did have a National Service requirement not too long ago. Here we called it Selective Service, perhaps to distinguish it from British National Service, but it was really the same thing.Just as whether you call the IRS, Inland Revenue Service (BR) or Internal Revenue Service (Amer) makes little real difference.

Selective Service was the draft, NOTHING to do with National Service.