All Comments on 'Pretty Perfect'

I really enjoyed that! I hope you keep writing!

Hasn’t this story been posted before?

@anon - maybe you read it somewhere else, but here, it is the first time I made it available

This was so good! Thanks for sharing it with us!

Would love to see Max let his body hair grow. With an olive skin tone, a bit of brunet body hair for his chest and abs and arms would be an additional turn-on!

.. I so wish this was longer! ;)

Just loved it! Short and sweet but I really got attached to the characters. Thanks so much!

Wow, guys, I wasn't expecting so many nice comments! I have plenty of stories to tell and it's nice to share. You can always check my profile to see what I'm up to. You'll find there my tumblr, too, where I post updates, artwork, and sexy guys.

Keep writing. This was a great story. I agree wish it was longer.

Nice story. You need to have someone read over it first. Brunette, blonde for starters. Also you referred to their hair colour too much- once is enough. It detracts from the story line. Just use their names and if you want to throw in hair colour use it to describe a setting or image ‘Max thought the way Sean’s blonde hair stood up was adorable’ etc...

Hey Laura,

My personal preference for writing style (in my case as a reader) is exactly the kind of story you write. I absolutely love to see LGBTQ characters, primarily gay men, in the stories I read as accepted, loving, complex 3-dimensional characters with their own strengths and weaknesses. (The bad boys don't HAVE to be quite so loving :)) I love to see their relationships develop with a healthy dose of detail which is reasonably plausible given the environment in which they are living. I love to read about their sex lives and their platonic friendships within context. For me, this context is more important than the descriptions of the sex. What sex does occur in the story should be there to support the rest of the story.

I love both 'Pretty Perfect' and 'A Good Servant' for all these reasons. You're fast becoming one of my favorite authors! Glad to see that your Patreon patronage is growing so fast. You deserve it.

The only significant suggestion I would make regarding this story is that it is too short! When I fall in love with the characters, I want to them to keep them around for a good while! Again based on my preferences, I would have loved to see Max and Sean develop a D/s relationship. It seems to me that the story has been set up perfectly for a loving D/s relationship to develop, perhaps with some conflict based on their differing ethnic backgrounds and the developing D/s component of their relationship.

David

This was a good read and I like the way you built the characters. It could easily have been longer, but I'll be checking for more of your writing.

This story was a little short but that did not detract from it being good. You have much longer stories too. I am not keen on the dom/sub except in the most gentle of ways so I am happy this did not go down that road. I don't mind you using hair color to identify the characters. That's just a different way of doing things, as long as it is not overdone and yours was not overdone. Anon below is wrong and you are right: "brunette" and "blonde" are with reference to females; "brunet" and "blond" refer to males - to whom you were referring.

Sugary sweet like max's tongue

Thanks for this wholesomely, perfect dream. It depend just on us, to keep the dream alive. I liked it throughout and it kept my Papi stiff with a smile in my face.

What a beautiful story 100/10

Cute