All Comments on 'QuaranTeam - Dave in Dallas Ch. 04'

Thats a hell of a cliffhanger... Just Evil! Now I'm extra looking forward to the next one!

Not the ending I was expecting.

Wow did not expect the son. Now need to learn if he is still alive.

Gets curiouser all the time.. nice cliffhanger... When You decide to mover them to a bigger home how about one of the ones on W Lawther by the lake or up in Highland Park? Yeah, I am a Dallas guy...now living somewhere else. Great job, I look forward to more

The banter is great

@gemman1:

I thought about specifying a particular existing location, but decided against it. I even did a real estate search in Dallas area looking for ideas and found one that seemed great, but it wasn't in a neighborhood, and that will be de regueur in the QTverse.

@AZTT2:

Thank you! It's something I've been working on.

Characters have a good flow between them.

One thing that is starting to get a little annoying (across all the QuaranTeam stories) is the fact that due to the vaccination process and heightened libido of the women after first getting it, all first sexual encounters happen straight away without any development of sexual tension between the characters.

NorthWest is the only one really that has consistently found a way to build interaction with females not imprinted yet. Some ended up as partners, some didn't. Something to think about as with any long form series the build up and development is what most people comeback for.

Loving this slice of Quaranteam sagas.

I am not sure that there is a story here. David gets females delivered to his house and they make love; repeat again and again. There appears to be no outside, larger world.

There has got to be some conflict, some purpose that drives the tale to its solution, whether win or fail.

This is in scifi, so let's have some more scifi, please.

Awesome. Can not wait for the next installment!

First, good story. Very readable and engaging. I just found this offshoot and read through the 4 chapters available. A couple of comments, though.

Having been around several rabid Star Trek fans (including folks who set up and worked conventions) the title they prefer is "Trekkers". "Trekkies" will get you immediately corrected and lectured.

The acronym is HFMIC (it rolls off the tongue easier, too.) 😆 The definition you provided is correct.

Whoa. What an ending. I'm guessing Eddie died and Dave got so upset he punched a whole in the wall or something. We'll have to wait and see

Enjoying this story.

@U2053:

Yes, Dave is 46. The fifty is a typo, caused by not enough double-checking. Kevin, the protagonist in The Bunker, my other series, is 50.

@Anon:

I'm prefer "Trekkie", unless I'm in god-mode, in which case, I Trek, therefore I am. :D

And to all: It's only the fourth chapter. There are things planned. be careful what you wish for though.

Out of the QT stories I've read so far, Lupe might be my favorite harem member in any of them. Her talk with David at the beginning of the chapter on him needing to focus on the things only he can do and letting everyone else worry about everything else was awesome. She's already got this situation figured out and is approaching it with a logical, no nonsense attitude, with an eye towards the future. A lot of the characters in a lot of these stories take a more lackadaisical attitude towards the situation and just kind of react to things as they happen. Lupe is proactively thinking about the future and how to arrange things efficiently so everything will run as smoothly as possible. Honestly, I usually dislike single mom characters but I'm making an exception here, Lupe is great!

A very solid 5. A very interesting story. I really appreciate the character development. Not usually seen in this genre. And whoever proofreads is doing an excellent job. I can't wait to see more. I am also reading your Bunker story.

With Lupe's home next door and more women due to expand the household, I would think combining the two properties and adding to both would be something that would have been brought up by now. Especially after Lupe's speech after she caught Dave carrying laundry to his washing machine. Especially with them having to check on the chickens in Lupe's backyard.

Maybe even moved Lupe, Esme and Becca's stuff into a driveway storage unit while Lupe's house is torn down and rebuilt to be a bigger house. Hell if the neighbors behind them are dead with no next of kin, maybe they get those properties too and expand the backyard and the greenhouse, maybe even add some pigs, goats &/or sheep if the backyard is large enough.

Hopefully that will be added in your next chapter...

Not rural enough for pigs and sheep. Otherwise, well, just wait and see.

Ok so I got here a little late, but I have to say this is well worth the time! I think it's interesting that unlike many others you have found common connections from prior to the outbreak to make most of David's team come together! I like it and think that it's definitely more likely in many ways. Looking forward to your next!

5 Stars ✨ and a flock of 👍s. I agree with all of the thoughts below. As I have noted other places in this QT Universe, it is interesting to see the different takes/reactions from the authors. As a native Texan, and an Okie transplant, I can see the subtle variations in the USA regions. Having had my first career in the US Air Force, serving in several sections of the country, as well a year in southeast Asia, and 9 years in Europe, and having served with Aussies, Germans, Turks, Spaniards, Lao and Cambodian aviators, I see the influences each of the authors' culture in their writing. It makes the reading much more enjoyable.

Great chapter. I've read it several times now and each time I started crying at the end. Such raw emotion

Typo? : "Her torse collapsed" torso?

Suggestion "...for a physics lab students could do from home..," This could be read 2 ways, a physics that lab students could, or a physics lab that students could... People from a low science background are going to do a double-take before getting it at the moment, which will interrupt immersion. I'd suggest adding the "that" in to remove ambiguity.

Great story. Awesome contribution to the Universe. Sorry the proof-reader in me struck. If you want pre-publication proofing done ask otterly for my details.

Great work, but a few typos and such need to be corrected. Branches of the US military are always capitalized.

Chickens, your guys seem to have stopped feeding them...

Just reread this chapter and had given it a 5* rating. However, I also saw that you are now a professional writer. The Literotica home page indicates that it is for amateur writers. Sorry, but I will be removing you from my Following list, but maintain story in my favorites section. Best of luck in your new career, and try not to folllow CP & BTB by holding chapters back months. An old saying from Alpha Centuri "May the light of a million SUNS guide you on your travels" Stay safe.

Carnes8004, that felt like an unfair comment. Many people writing can use the money, don't read if you don't like it. I really appreciate all the people spending their time on these various stories.

I do wish our hero Dave had some warts. He's like the perfect middle aged man. Treats everyone well, respects women, treats them well and never creeps on them. What are his faults, missing the signals from women. Maybe we'll learn about some of them related to his son and his spouse. I wouldn't mind some anger and mistakes. If I was in a relationship where the other person had to have sex with me or I'd go insane (with lust or whatever), and I had to share with a variety of younger, sexier whatever people, it would be a bit of a power imbalance. But nothing wrong with good old Dave.

President Pelosi? Thank God that didn't happen, though Biden is a disaster. Hey, maybe that's why the country sounds like a shithole.

I agree with the comment on typos. I wonder if you mentioned President Pelosi as a joke, though a sad one. Biden has been a disaster for our country.

You two do realize this is a spinoff of Corrupting Power's Quaranteam story right? he made the universe, I'm just playing in it.

The two Anonymous comments from the same person from 2 months ago. You are a bit late to the party on political Bitching!! CorruptingPower Quaranteam story has 50 chapters and Now on Book 2 with about 10 chapters in, so started a substantial while ago!! And it's obvious that you haven't read it, but it wouldn't be your cup of tea, nor All the spin-off's from that Universe, about 8 or 9 Authors and their stories. Also wouldn't be your cup of tea, and you just stumbled into this rather good story on this chapter!! In CorruptingPowers Universe. And like the Author has said, he is just playing in it. You just couldn't help yourselves, not to make a comment about the story, even the chapter!! No you zeroed in on the Politics and had to put your 2 penny's worth, On Your Opinions because it says something you don't like or agree with. It's a FANTASY FICTION STORY IN A FANTASY FICTION UNIVERSE!! And I hate to spoil the Original series stories, but early in the story, just 2 lines say that the President and Vice President collapse and die, so it goes to whoever is Speaker of the House to become the temporary President until an election can be held. And I am Not American, Nor Live in America, but We All Know About American Politics!! If this was Real Life and you came across an Political article, a What If Scenario? And you didn't like or agree with what was said, left a comment but went on about your other grievances which wasn't in the Article, you just come across as desperate and divisional, that you're view is right and no other view is valid, and the if you don't agree with us then you are against us. You are the enemy!! Polarisation Politics. And blaming a minority for all your woes, about a wall and migrants. Feels like the 1930's (and the 1980's with the talk of Nukes) with xenophobia and isolationist thinking. Something that wouldn't be your cup of tea is the new Alex Garland Film "Civil War", a What If Scenario of America imploding resulting in a Civil War, and what it would look like and our MPV are American photo journalists covering the War. Previous Alex Garland films are "28 days later","Ex Machina", "Men", so will be interesting to see, but all eyes are on the Americans and how they react to the Film...So you have had your rants, why don't you read CorruptingPower Quaranteam story, it's a very good What If Scenario fictitious story!! And, Have a nice day!!🙂 *Anony-mouse* Ps. There's an old saying, When America Sneezes, the Rest of the World Catches a Cold...

When I heard this was part of a shared world, I intended to backtrack and see where this fits in with the timeline. But, apparently I’m just going to binge read this arc as I just seem to keep clicking on the next chapter. Such an interesting story line. Thanks for sharing your vision with us.