Rachel and Jeff Pt. 02

Rachel was getting annoyed.

"Make each other happy? That could mean lots of things. It could mean that we are roommates who get along very well, or that we live near each other and babysit each others' kids, or stay out of each others' way because we irritate each other so much! So which is it, mom?"

Her mother smiled down at her.

"Yes"

"Wha...yes? You didn't see anything, you just made a statement that could be interpreted to be true no matter how our lives turn out. Uggh!"

Her mother continued to smile politely as Rachel stormed out of the room.

"So, uh, d'you need help getting down off the fridge?"

"Thanks Jeff, but my physical form will remove itself from this spot when it feels ready."

"Ah, right, of course it will. Should've realized that. Just...call out if you need a hand."

"I'll be fine, dear. Now go after your sister."

*

"There you are."

Rachel was in her bedroom laying on her back on the floor beside her bed, away from the door so she couldn't be seen from the doorway. Jeff laid across her bed and looked down at her.

"Here I am."

"Mom's still on the fridge, said she would get herself down. I just hope she doesn't break her damn ankle."

"Yeah, that'd be bad."

"So what's going on? Why's mom got you so pissed? You know that's just how she is, don't take it so seriously."

"It's not mom, and I'm not pissed."

"Well what's up then?"

Rachel took a deep breath and looked up at her brother.

"Jeff, what the hell are we doing?"

"What do you mean?"

"Come on, don't do that. You know what I mean."

"I think...we're doing what feels good, and right, and makes us happy."

"So this feels right to you? Making out with your sister? Playing with her tits? Eating her out? Cumming in her mouth?"

"Honestly...yeah."

"How did we even get to this point?"

"We had grown apart. We were ex-best friends who reconnected, and maybe it's a special twin thing or something, but when we reconnected it just felt like the other half of my soul was put back in place, and I think you felt the same. Things just happened naturally after that, and we formed a relationship."

"How would you classify our relationship Jeff? Am I your sister/plaything?"

"Well no. I know we haven't really talked about this, but I kind of think of you as my girlfriend I guess."

"Girlfriend? Really?"

"Well, when you put your penis in a girl's mouth and plunge your tongue into more than one of her orifices, you start to feel a little sweet on her. It's only natural, I think."

"That's kind of my point man. This doesn't feel very natural."

"I don't understand. Earlier today you were begging me to finger you in Biology class, and now all of a sudden you realize that incest freaks you out?"

"It's just...mom mentioned she saw the future. We are 'going to make each other very happy'. How exactly is that going to happen?"

"I dunno, marriage?"

"Yeah, but siblings can't get married. It's illegal."

"Lots of things used to be illegal. Same-sex marriage, smoking dope, jaywalking."

"Jaywalking is still illegal dummy."

"Whatever. Maybe we'll start a revolution, and closeted siblings in love across the world will join us in the pursuit of equal rights!"

"I'm not so confident there are that many of us dude."

"Maybe not. Okay then, we don't get married. That doesn't mean we can't be together right?"

"You prepared to expose our relationship to all our friends and family? Aunts, uncles, and cousins? Granny? The dudes in your band?"

"Well maybe we don't tell anyone."

"I don't want to live a lie the rest of our lives Jeff, and I know you don't either! This is what is bothering me, we have no future! It's impossible."

"So wait, are you saying that you're done? Just like that?"

"I...I don't know."

Jeff laid on her bed and looked down at her with a worried expression.

"But I don't wanna be done."

"Look, you were leaving me anyway at the end of summer. We either deal with this now or then, and I don't want to spend the rest of the summer dreading this goddamn moment!"

Rachel was starting to get choked up, but was holding back the best she could.

"Leaving you? Is that how you view it? How many eighteen year olds get a chance to travel with their band, play live shows, write music? How could I pass this up?"

Rachel composed herself and spoke softly.

"I know Jeff. This is an opportunity that I would never ask you to turn down. But when you go that'll be it for us. We'll be 3,000 miles apart and busy as hell. Just face it, it's over."

"Can I ask you a question Rach? Please answer honestly. Is that what this is really all about? I mean, you breaking up with me, does it even have anything to do with everything you said before about us being twins? Or is it all to do with me leaving in a few months?"

Rachel waited a while before answering.

"It's like one percent the sibling thing, 99 percent the leaving thing."

Jeff smiled sadly.

"Well, I can at least live with that a little better. M'not gonna lie, this is painful. But I'm a little happier knowing that you don't find the idea of being with me disgusting all of a sudden."

"Of course I don't. And you have no idea how much I don't want to do this, but I can't wait around all summer until the moment you leave for good pretending to be a happy couple. I won't do it."

Jeff reached down and lightly squeezed Rachel's hand.

"I respect that. Damn does it suck but I respect it."

Jeff held onto her hand for a minute before sitting up.

"Think I'll go to my room now. I think I might be in the denial stage and I need to try and process this."

"Ok. See ya'."

Rachel heard her brother's footsteps as he exited her room and shut the door. Then she shut her eyes while also shutting off her mind.

*

Rachel had fallen asleep almost immediately after Jeff left her room, and woke up feeling like horse shit. A heaping mound of horse shit that had been scratched up and pecked at by a chicken looking for seeds, and then the pile of horse shit had been shit on by the chicken.

Yep, that about summed up how she felt.

She rose up, back aching after laying on the floor for so long. It wasn't fully dark out, but it was getting close. She saw the time and figured she had been asleep for at least a couple of hours.

Nothing like breaking hearts to really zap the energy out of you.

She wasn't hungry, but was dying of thirst, so she stepped across the hall to the bathroom, bent over the sink, and put her mouth under the tap. Water cascaded into her mouth and she gulped heavily. She stayed leaning on the sink for a moment after she was done drinking, and recalled the last time she had found herself in this position on this very sink. It had been a couple of weeks prior, and it was the very first time Jeff, or anyone for that matter, had performed oral sex on her.

The memory made her stomach churn with grief, and she quickly went back across the hall to her room and shut the door.

She needed a distraction, an outlet for her grief.

She needed to sing.

There are many different ways that a woman can have a beautiful voice. She can be low and husky, high-pitched and sweet, powerful and operatic, soft and tender. There are so many different types.

The best adjectives that described Rachel's particular style of singing were tuneless, jarring, and offensive, and she knew it. But damn did she love to sing. Something about belting out those off-key notes really just made her feel so happy and full of life, and that was exactly what she needed in this moment.

The first song that popped into her head was a song called "Don't Worry Baby" by The Beach Boys. She thought it was such a sweet song with a very unique and catchy melody, and she was about to butcher the shit out of it.

She typed the song into the search bar of her browser on her computer, turned the volume up as high as it would go, and hit play. She waited 15 seconds for the ad to finish, and then she gathered herself as the song began.

WELL IT'S BEEN BUILDING UP INSIDE OF ME FOR, OH, I DON'T KNOW HOW LONG...

Rachel let the first line pass before chiming in herself.

"I don't know why...bleh blee bloo...la la la...go wrong!"

Along with having no rhythm and being tone deaf, she had a horrible memory when it came to song lyrics.

She continued to sing as loud as she could for the rest of the song, which was less than three minutes. As it faded it out, she went over to her computer, scrolled the video back to the beginning, and played it again.

She was really hitting her stride this second time through, she thought, and it was almost a cleansing feeling.

"Don't worry baby! Everything will be alright!"

She screamed this song out to the high heavens, though it sounded as if it originated in the depths of hell.

All of a sudden her door flew open and Jeff came charging in.

"Rachel! Holy shit, are you okay!?"

Rachel looked at her brother with a confused expression.

"Yeah..."

"I thought you were hurt! I thought you were screaming out in pain and terror!"

"No, just...singing."

"Oh! Damn girl..."

"Shut up! We have long ago established that I don't have the greatest voice in the world."

"It sounded like a raccoon was choking on a kazoo."

"Ugh. Whatever."

The song was fading out again, and Rachel walked over to her computer and, for the second time, started the song over.

This time, she just sat on her bed quietly and softly patted her feet on the floor as Jeff remained in her doorway.

The song reached the main chorus for the first time, and both of them remained where they were.

DON'T WORRY BABY, EVERYTHING WILL TURN OUT ALRIGHT

Rachel looked up at Jeff with watery eyes, and he immediately went to sit beside her. He put his arm around her shoulder, just like any brother would do for his grieving sister, and they just sat together for the duration of the song.

The song faded out to nothing and all they could hear was the sound each others' breathing.

"Erectile dysfunction got you feeling...down? Visit your doctor, and ask them about Erectopen. Consult a physician if an erection lasts more than four hours."

Another Beach Boys song started after the advertisement.

The twins looked sideways at each other and busted out into a laughing fit that lasted a few minutes.

"Holy shit I needed that!"

"I think we both did."

"Hey Jeff?"

"Yeah?"

"You know I love you right?"

"Never doubted it."

"Good."

Jeff stood up and made his way to Rachel's door.

"See ya' in the morning Rach."

"Still walking to school together right?"

"Absolutely."

"Good."

*

The next several days passed and things returned basically back to normal for the twins. That is, pre-fooling around normal. They spent just as much time together, if not more, than they had been when they were in a "relationship". Exams became their main focus, and both were striving to do as well as they could. Rachel wondered what was sparking Jeff's sudden enthusiasm for studying, and figured that it was just something to focus on and get his mind off of other issues.

Exams came and went, and both Jeff and Rachel did extremely well. Rachel ended up getting A's in all her classes, of course, and Jeff ended up with 4 B's and 1 C.

They were hanging out together in the living room on an afternoon 5 days before their graduation ceremony.

"Jeff, I am so very proud of you. I know it probably doesn't mean much to you, and I know it will literally have no impact on your immediate or long term future, but for you to go from failing miserably to the grades you ended up with in a matter of weeks, well...I hope you realize how impressive that is."

"Well, you know, I'm a pretty impressive guy, sis. Brains, looks, ambitions."

"Pssh, whatever. More like a little bit of rhythm and a pocket full of dreams."

"Don't be jealous."

Rachel simply smiled at Jeff.

"And hey! What about you, Rach?"

"What about me?"

"You were able to help this poor, pathetic soul climb out of the gutters of academia while maintaining A's in all your classes! You know, I feel like we are always talking about me and my accomplishments, my ambitions and dreams, but never about yours. What's your plan Rachel?"

"My plan?"

"Yeah. I know you're going to college, but why?"

"Uhhh...because that's what you do when you are done with high school. It's the next step. Well, for most of us. No offense."

"But what are your plans? What are your interests? What are you even planning on studying? I never hear you talk about your interests. What do you want to be?"

"Geez Jeff, you're kinda putting me on the spot here. I mean...I just figured I would find out what I wanted when I got there."

"College costs money right?"

"And they say you are slow. Look at you, knowing about the economy and shit."

"Well Rachel, call me crazy, but I just don't get why someone would want to spend tens of thousands of dollars to go off somewhere without actually having a concrete, long-term plan."

"Almost everyone else does the same thing, Jeff."

"Yeah, well you've proven in recent weeks that you don't need to just do what everyone else does."

"What are you suggesting? That I don't go to college? What else would I do Jeff?"

"Come with me."

Rachel considered this for a moment.

"No."

"Ouch."

"You don't think I've thought about that Jeff? What would I do while you spend countless hours making music and playing in clubs and bars that I'm legally not even allowed to go in? As much as I'd love to follow you, I've got to think about myself and what's best for my future first."

"I know, you don't have to explain further. It was a long shot, just thought I'd throw it out there. Really though, you say you have to think about your future first, right? Consider if you think it's best to start your adult life off entering an institution that's going to take money from you that you don't have, especially when you don't even know why you're going there in the first place. I just want what's best for you, Rach. Maybe it's time you think outside the box."

Jeff lightly patted her shoulder as he got up and left the room, leaving Rachel to ponder his words.

*

"Where have you been Rachel? We're going to be late!"

It was the afternoon of their graduation day, and they were in fact running a little late.

"Sorry! We're so close to the school though, we can make it just fine. I'm already dressed, just have to throw the cap and gown on."

"Where were you anyway?"

"Just out, doing a little thinking."

"You've been out doing a little thinking quite a bit this week, everything alright?"

"Yeah. Look, I'll explain better later. Let's go."

They made it to the ceremony in time, as it turned out, and took their seats in the gymnasium with the rest of their graduating class. They were side by side of course, as everyone sat in alphabetical order by last name.

The ceremony took a little while, as these things tend to do. So many people got up on stage to talk: classmates, teachers, random people from the community. Rachel kept looking sideways at her brother, thinking about everything they had been through, and missing him greatly. He caught her eye a few times and they would smile at each other. Eventually Rachel just couldn't take it anymore and reached over and took his hand in hers. Jeff simply looked down at their interlocked hands, squeezed tightly, and looked back on stage. It felt so good to Rachel to feel his touch again. She felt a lump in her throat start to form but was able to control herself for the time being.

They held hands up until the point where their row stood up and marched up to the stage. She watched her brother as he walked across the stage before her and accepted his diploma, once again feeling a great sense of pride. Then it was her turn, and she took her diploma and went quickly back to her seat, wanting to hold Jeff's hand again, missing his touch.

They held hands for the rest of the graduation ceremony, which wasn't much longer. They reached the end of the ceremony and, along with everyone else, they threw their caps in the air. Everyone around them was cheering and jumping up and down with joy. Rachel and Jeff just turned to one another and embraced. They stayed like that for a while, figuring everyone was too preoccupied to pay them any mind, and not caring if anyone did.

Finally they broke apart. The chaos had died down around them slightly, but there were still tons of people around, so Jeff made a suggestion.

"Wanna just sit down until some of these people clear off a bit?"

"Sure."

They sat quietly for a few minutes before Jeff spoke again.

"What are you thinking about, Rach?"

"Oh boy, so many things. You could probably figure out most of them."

"I'm probably feeling most of them myself."

"Yeah probably. So whatcha got planned for this evening?"

"There's a party me and the guys were invited to. Actually, just about the whole graduating class was invited from what I hear. You wanna come?"

"I think you know the answer to that."

"Not your scene?"

"You know me so well."

"So what are you going to do then?"

"You know. Go home, be lame."

"Hmmmmmm."

"Hmmm what?"

"I'm not gonna lie, that sounds pretty nice. You mind if I join you?"

"Don't skip your party, you only graduate high school once."

"Yeah, you're right. Better make this night count...so what movie are we watching?"

Rachel smiled at her brother.

"You sure?"

"Hell yes."

"Well, let's get the hell out of here then."

*

After they got home, neither of the twins bothered to change out of their clothes they wore under their graduation gowns. They plopped themselves down on the couch, Rachel wearing a burgundy dress, Jeff in black slacks and a white shirt.

"Ok Jeff, close your eyes. I'll pick the movie, and you listen and see how long it takes before you figure out what's playing."

"Alright, just...don't pick anything dumb."

"That would be so unlike me."

Rachel turned on one of their movie streaming services, found the movie she had in mind, and pushed play.

Jeff listened intently for about ten seconds before he spoke.

"Yep, definitely recognize this intro music. This movie from the late eighties?"

"Yes."

"Rated PG?"

"Yes."

"Is it the story of a bachelor police officer who becomes the unwilling caretaker of an orphaned dog, and together they solve a murder case?"

"Yes!"

"Haha! Turner and Hooch! Classic! Thanks for not picking something dumb, you did real good kid."

"There should never have been any doubt!"

They sat side by side on the couch as they watched, close enough so that their bodies were barely not touching each other's.

About 20 minutes into the movie, their mother made a rare appearance in the living room.

"Hey mom, wanna sit and watch?"

"Unfortunately I have an important matter to attend to. Otherwise I certainly would. Thank you for the offer though daughter."

"Whatcha got going on? Gonna get high?"

"That's a very inaccurate description of what I do."

"Yeah, I keep trying to describe what you do, and I just keep missing the mark. Oh by the way, your only two children graduated high school today."

"Oh yes, I know. I was there of course. That's why I came in here, to tell you both how proud I am."

"Where were you sitting?"

"My physical form was here at the house."

"Out of body experience?"

"That's not how that works, dear."

"Damn, missed the mark again."

"Ok my lovelies, I must be off. Enjoy your night. In fact, somehow I think you will enjoy it more than normal."

They ignored the last comment from their mom and turned their attention back to the movie.

"Jeff?"

"Hmm?"

"Can we hold hands again?"

Jeff smiled at his sister, grabbed her hand in his, and pulled it into his lap.