Roommates/Secrets Don't Make Friends

Author's note: This story is dedicated to all the men in my life doing their best, especially BM, my new sub who came up with the concept for this story and asked me to write it. Thank you for reading!

"Derrick I am sick of yo shit!"

A plate hit the wall to my left. I ducked hard as hell, she has finally lost it.

"Baby calm down it aint even like that, I don't even know this girl!"

For a split second she wanted to believe me then picked up her phone.

"Oh you don't know her huh then explain to me why she got a picture of you right here!"

She held her phone in my face, it was me. I remember the picture I told her dumbass not to post. My face had an emoji over it so I went for the best defense possible.

"That's not me you can't even see dude face!"

Pinch, zoom, shoved back in my face "That aint your stupid ass tattoo right there on your arm Derrick or some other fool got the same dumbass momma!"

"Hold up now, you aint about to get on my momma she aint been shit but good to you!"

Last ditch effort switch the reason we are mad and refocus the conversation.

"Fuck you and your momma because the WORST thing she ever did was give me yo, lyin, cheatin, no good ass!"

Ok, that was disrespectful on so many levels.

"I can't believe I fell for yo shit again. Always ooh baby I'm sorry, and I love you never again and here I am looking like boo boo the fool!"

Double down.

"Im telling you that aint me I don't know who this girl is, I sure as hell don't know dude in the picture this chick lyin, this is how they get us babe. They see we got a good thing and trying to destroy it because they hating. You know it's just me and you babe you KNOW that. Ride or die right?"

I moved in for a hug, I couldn't see her face, she covered it with her hands after the last rant. I couldn't tell if I was in the clear or not. I went in anyway.

SLAP

"You are stupid as hell if you think I am EVER going to let you touch me again, get yo shit and get the fuck out!"

"YOOOO! You aint have to hit me what the fuck!"

"You aint have to stick your dick in every little slut that pass your way niether, but this is life and the shit hurts get the fuck out my house!"

She started pushing me towards the door while I hurled protests on deaf ears. Nothing was going to work so I flipped it again.

"Fuck you Keysha! Always believing these hoes man I ain't did nothing with that girl!"

Door slam

"Gimme my shit!"

I beat on the door for a few minutes looking for my shit. For my tenacity I got a shower from the second story window. My phone went flying along with handfuls of clothes. I shouted in protest but the storm continued ending with a suitcase landing on my back while I tried to pick up my sneakers.

Twenty minutes and an embarrassing pack later I slammed my car door and let my tires squeal pulling out of the neighborhood. I called the homey Church and told him to meet me at the spot, once he agreed at least I had a direction and I would get a meal. "The spot" was where we went to chill out, it was this local bbq spot run by an old man and his wife. It was a great place to sit down and re-group. I pulled up to the smell of brisket and grabbed a plate and a beer waiting for Church to arrive.

Most people think they called him "church" specifically because he had the tendency to be a little "preachy" with his opinions but I was there when he got the name and know it's a name based on a threat. Back in the day, little J used to beat up on a kid named fish and he would always tell him "after church", before long it just became "church" and little J had a new name. It also didn't help that he was built like a brick shit house, the man was big as hell, like cant wear a red t-shirt or we would think he's the kool-aid man big. He was always good people to me and one of the few partners I had left from back in the day.

I scrolled through my phone wondering whose couch I could crash on. Naturally, I would ask Church since we went way back but he got a new girl and I knew how that went. They moved in together a while back, we have been around eachother but I don't know her like that. Last thing I need is another woman bitching at me about whatever. I tested the waters with a few "what you up to?" texts to see who bit, when Church showed up.

"What it dew, baby boi!"

He did have a knack for making me smile with his lingo while his hand came out slapping mine with his usual fervor.

"Aint shit man, just a day in the life, you eating?"

He laughed and leaned back rubbing his stomach.

"Am I eating? I ordered from the car lil bruh."

On cue A voice called out from the shack window "Church!"

"See I'm VIP round here baby boi!"

I laughed as he did an overly dramatic shuffle dance to the window to retrieve his food. No responses on my phone, see this is why you cant love these hoes. I picked through my food listening to Church haggle for more hot sauce before he came and sat down with three plates.

"You betta not waste all that meat man you gotta get those bones!"

"Man if you don't get out my plate with yo big ass!" I laughed pointing to his banquet.

"I'm just saying." Was almost the last thing he said as he choked on an overfilled forkful of greens needing to correct himself sipping some tea.

"You done dying man? You know aint not one of us round here can give your big ass the heimlich I need you to be more cautious out here!"

"Man *ahem*, shut the fuck up and tell me why you got me out here, I gotta head to work in a bit."

I exhaled and ran my fingers over my waves.

"I need to know who you know that can let me hop on a couch for a few days while I find a spot, Keysha tripping."

"Oh KEYSHA tripping? Miss WWE, Miss Undertaker coming through with the claiborne kick with the Rick flair WHOOO!"

He was dying laughing, he looked like a bowl of jello in a versace shirt. I crossed my arms and let him get it out, I needed a favor so if it means he gets to pick on the one time she beat the crap out of my side chick then I let it go.

"Did they ever find that poor girl wig? The only bitch that needed a brazilian butt lift to surgically replace her ass! The only bitch to hold a title belt in three weight classes! The only bitch to come off the top rope with a table! The only bitch-"

"Church! Damn we get it Keysha crazy."

He was still laughing.

"Aight, aight cool. I'm good. I promise I'm cool."

He was in fact not cool, still wiping tears from his eyes.

"What she catch you cheating again?"

"Man naw it aint even like that I didnt even fuck the bitch she talking about she all the way tripping this time."

He let out a howl and burst into another fit of laughter. I just sat there and stared at his big goofy ass.

"Ok, so let me get this straight." He shoved a forkful into his mouth trying to eat while laughing.

"She accusing you of cheating, which you are because you aint shit but NOT with the bitch you getting accused of fucking?"

"Look I took a picture with this chick at that pool party and she went and posted it. Now Keysha tripping."

He continued to chuckle picking through his food, shoving another forkful into his mouth.

"Ok, so now you need a place to crash and you ain't wanna ask ya boy for it directly so you ask if I know somebody?" His tone suddenly became serious.

I was taken aback a bit. "Look I ain't trying to put you out, I need to crash on a couch and you got the new fancy bougie girl at the crib so I didn't wanna do all that."

He waved his hand dismissing my reasons and frowning.

"Naw man, you coming to the crib she will be aight. That's the end of that, you going to be back in Keysha bed in a week anyway."

I spent the rest of the meal telling him what happened under constant fear he was going to choke on something. We ended up having a few beers despite his constant reminder he had to go to work. Church was always good for a quick turn up and I had to admit I did feel better about my day. We eventually ended up on the road in our respective cars heading back to his place.

I checked my phone and checked to see what Keysha was posting, so far nothing. I pretended to not care and text another girl I met online to see if I could come through after I got settled at Church place.

We pulled up and I grabbed my bag trying to downplay how much I had in the car. Church just laughed at me shaking his head.

"You gotta stop fucking up before you REALLY aint got nowhere to stay."

"Yeah, yeah she's just mad, I'll be back in a week."

He chuckled, turning the key and swinging the door open.

"Baby girl put on some clothes we got company!" He yelled into the house.

"You can crash in the extra room so you aint taking up my living space, you know what I'm sayin."

"Yeah man, I appreciate it." I was about to work my way to the spare room when his girl came out the back.

This woman was a certified baddie, 5'8, thick thighs, nice tits and a head full of natural hair sticking out the top of her head wrap. She wore a pair of small shorts and a tight shirt, no bra and I noticed her pierced nipples and continued scanning, I followed her legs down to her white tipped toes gliding over the carpet.How the fuck did this big fool land all this?

She wasn't just beautiful, she was a professional type not a round the way girl like Keysha. She worked over the bank and wore suits to work, not a name tag. She walked, talked, and moved like a boss lady.

"Hey, baby." She kept her eyes on me until she landed a kiss on Church's lips.

Of course he gave her ass a little smack.

"You remember DaeDae right? He needs a place to crash for a bit so he's gonna be in the extra room till he back up." He said using an old nickname I couldn't stand.

"Don't do me like that." I said pushing him as best I could with this center of gravity being so firm.

He burst into laughter.

"I remember, Derrick right. Aniya." She stuck out her manicured hand still adorned with a diamond bracelet even though she looked ready for bed.

"Yeah don't let this fool get it twisted." I shook her hand.

"Aight cool, food in the fridge don't eat all my shit I will be back in the morning I am off to work boo."

He kissed his girl, slapped my hand once more and was out. I hiked my bag up on my shoulder and turned to go back to the room. Aniya was already in front of me giving me a solid view of her ass hanging out the bottom of her shorts. She turned around and I desperately pretended i wast staring.

"Do me a favor and don't smoke in the house, weed or otherwise, it took me forever to get Church weed habit outdoors."

"Yeah for sure, outside, you got it."

"I will leave a key on the counter in the morning just in case you need to leave during the day. Towels in the closet here. You know the drill, DaeDae."

She laughed and walked into the room leaving me standing there like some idiot. I shook my head and went into the room, closing the door behind me. I spent the next hour cleaning myself up and getting in bed, still finding my phone to be dry as hell.

Soon as I aint with nobody these hoes disappear but let me be in the house and they're all on my shit.

I said fuck it and went to sleep. I got up the next day confused about the noises I was hearing, it took me a minute to realise I wasn't home. The sound of a blender and soft music filled my ears. I got up and went to the bathroom seeing Aniya in the kitchen dressed for work, throwing her a good morning. She simply smiled and put a finger over her mouth telling me to be quiet before she pointed to the room and put two hands to the side of her head.

Ah, church was home and sleep and somehow my voice was louder than the blender. I nodded and went to the bathroom. When I came out after brushing my teeth she was gone, on the counter was a green concoction and a key with a little note.

"Good luck DaeDae! X"

Jesus, now he got her doing this shit.

I took a sip of the green juice and immediately poured the rest down the drain and rinsed it out. Today's mission was to find another place to stay. Stop one, Keysha's place.

Twenty minutes later I knocked on the door of my recently departed residence. It was still early but she had to be up. The door opened, my smile dropped as some other dude stood there in a pair of shorts and a sly grin.

"What's good brother, you must be the ex, she in the shower come on in."

The disrespect!My stance immediately changed as I prepared for violence, he saw and felt it putting his hands up with a smile.

"You got the wrong one, she called me here last night. I dunno what beef yall got but it aint got nothing to do with me playa."

My blood boiled but he was right this had nothing to do with him. He put his hands down.

"See I knew you was a common sense kinda playa, come get some juice she cooked breakfast."

No you didn't just offer me scraps from MY bitch breakfast! I let logic go and swung. I caught him by surprise square in the nose. His head went back and I came with the left hook to his temple. In two hits he was down and out cold. My fist hurt enough that I had to take a second to shake them out. I picked up a glass of juice and left it on the floor next to his face so he would wake up and see it.

"Hey so after you done- what the fuck Derrick!"

"Nice to see you too, boo." I looked up seeing her still in a towel halfway through rubbing lotion on her arms.

"What are you doing here?"

I came to try and figure this out but now I have leverage so I am going to make you feel guilty.

"I wanted to see if you hit that girl up and had her tell you the truth. However, I see you had other plans."

"The fuck you mean the truth. You fucked that bitch!"

"I didn't, if you would have asked her she would have told you we took that picture and that's it. I knew you wouldn't believe me so I assumed you would figure it out yourself."

Yesssss this is working.

"Look I know I be messing up sometimes but I really didn't this time, but it seems like you done, so aight be easy. Sorry for the mess."

I looked her up and down one last time letting my eyes rest on hers for a moment too long and turned to leave. I made it to the door when she called out for me.

"Derrick, I swear to god if I hit this girl up and you make me look like a fool again I'm going to beat her and your ass."

"No need, I'm sure this is what you want now. " I said pointing at the snoring brother on the floor and walking out.

I got in the car and pulled on aggressively trying to keep my face sullen until I turned the corner where a smile crept across my face. I had her.

I spent the day chilling still looking for a new spot. It was time to reinstate the bachelor spot and prepare for the inevitable next blowup with Keysha. Surprisingly it turned out to be harder than expected and by the end of the day I still haven't heard from Keysha.

I returned to Church place in the evening in just enough time to catch him before he went back to work for the night. I back briefed him on the day much to his enjoyment he laughed his ass off listening and rolling up a few joints. I assumed he was about to smoke one and I could have used it but instead he put them in an ashtray and handed them to me.

"I'm out Holyfield, smoke these and relax man. Try again tomorrow." We slapped hands and he disappeared into the house calling for his lady.

I popped the top off a beer and lit one of the joints staring at my phone wondering why Keysha hasn't hit me up yet when the sliding door opened up behind me.

"Heard you had a long day." Aniya said coming and sitting in the chair opposite me clad in the same casual night wear she had on the day before with a tighter fitting shirt clearly outlining her breasts.

"You could say that, thanks for the green juice by the way."

"You are welcome. You still stressing about your ex is not going to get you anywhere."

I braced myself for a barrage of unsolicited advice taking a long hit.

"I am not stressing at all she will be back."

Her hand came out for the joint and I passed it.

"She may be back but you ain't never going to have her for real." She exhaled, passing it back.

"Why would you say that? You don't know me like that." I tried to hide the annoyance in my voice as she chuckled.

"Oh I know you type, you aint shit Derrick, you ain't never going to be shit either."

I stood up offended, ready to defend myself. She simply held out her hand for the joint. I passed it to her standing there like an idiot.

"What are you gonna hit me DaeDae?"

"I really wish you wouldn't call me that."

"How about I call you something else?" She asked, standing up seemingly challenging me.

"Derrick works."

"What about Daddy?" She let out a long exhale and handed the joint back.

"Excuse me?"

"You aint shit Derrick, here you are crashing at your boy place that you have known for years but you can't help but think with your dick."

"So what's the plan just to insult me until I become better?"

"No, the plan is to get you to admit you aint shit, and as soon as you admit it you are going to come inside and make me call you Daddy."

It's a trap, don't fall for it.

"Cute, you trying to get me and Church fucked up Yoko, I aint bout it. I will do you a favor and keep this conversation between us."

She chuckled, "Church would never believe you. You aint shit Derrick and it's ok its the role you play. You will get your girl back because you got good dick but you will lose her because you keep sharing it. So play your role and hand some of that dick over here."

"You got me fucked up." I put the joint out grabbing my phone and tried to walk past her, she stopped me placing a hand on my chest lightly.

She made eye contact sliding her hand down to the front of my sweats gripping my tool through the thick fabric.

"Just say it." She whispered rubbing my growing erection with one hand and pressing up on me with her body grabbing my hand placing it on her ass.

"Tell me you dont want this."

"I aint say all that, all I'm saying-"

She cut me off, slipping her hand in my sweats in between them and my boxers removing another layer between us.

"All youneed to say is Aniya I aint shit."

I bit my lip as her thumb slid up and down in my pants. She nodded her head running her hand up my back letting me feel her nails through my shirt.

"I aint shit."

She smiled, leaned in and kissed my neck.

"I know you aint Daddy."

Her hand left me and she began pulling away, sliding the door open reaching back for me. She led me down the hall towards her room. I followed her through the open door as she turned around to smile at me.

"Show me what you got Daddy."

I pushed her on the bed without a word. I got on top of her pulling the tight shirt over her head accidentally dislodging her head wrap at the same time. I pulled it off and discarded it with the shirt excited to see her pierced nipples. Sucking each nub she moaned holding my head encouraging me to do more. I removed her shorts, losing a nipple for only a moment before I was back on her. Kissing down her body I found myself between her thighs kissing around her mound teasing her. She grabbed my head with both hands turning it up towards her face, although I could only make out the contours of her lips and nose in the dark.

"I am not your girl, your girl fucking another man right now, fuck me like you mean it."

The message was clear. I stopped teasing and dove in tasting her desire. She wanted me mad and she achieved the desired result. I licked her long enough to keep her sopping wet and foster heavy breaths. I pulled up and tossed my shirt off my friend's bed, next came the sweats and boxers in one move. I was on my knees in bed between her thighs and she surprised me by leaning up and grabbing me with two hands, massaging my balls, stroking my cock and slobbering on the head with loud obscene slurps.