All Comments on 'Rough Night on the Rajdhani Express'

Hot as fuck!

Vivian, you certainly have kinky, erotic mind which you bring down and out for your readers. You have the writer in you. ..the skill and flair. It is not any one's cup of tea to write . Keep up the good work . You could do well with more writing - practice will make you perfect.

Good luck

Sir Phil Brown

(Mentorr cum facilitator )

philbrown811@gmail.com

Please continue to write, what a great imagination, but please, please, please, get an editor. Run on sentences, redundant statements in the same sentence.

You moved the story along, which was good, but it read like a grocery list, or a step by step manual.

However, very hot story.

Love all your work - but this story is uber sexy. I've done some travelling through Asia (and then some) myself a few years ago and can easily imagine this happening to me. It's so easy to listen to that little voice inside isn't it ?

Hmm.. I disagree with some of the negative comments and agree that your writing style is good but would benefit from an editor. This is perfect and your best one all it needs is a bit more in-the-moment thoughts and feelings as these events happen (less so much the physical descriptions; we all know what sex looks like).

Would love to edit your next work send me a msg!

Bruh someone get this chick to a therapist

I liked parts of the story but would have liked it better if it was more non consensual. She was really asking for them to use her so they did. They could had invited other guys in, charging a fee and making her earn some money for them.

I would also like it if she was with her husband in another car but they took her to theirs without her husband knowing. Keeping her there and taking turns on her while he searched for her. They have a white woman that they can use tied to the bunk in their cabin and once they were done with her they sent her back.

I would have loved to be there I got a hard on reading