The premise of the story is good. Unfortunately, in my opinion, the story is so chopped up that it becomes difficult to read. I hope you find an editor who can guide you through putting a good story together.
22 year old virgin...i think i've given up and i don't know what i'm doing here...i thought i knew but now... i don't know what i want...i just know i'm tired of being lonely &i know i act like a bad girl...deserving of discipline from one who can tame me. i just get too needy...