Scenes from a Marriage Pt. 20

Then I went into our room to get the bondage board out of the closet and bring it into the play room. But when I got there, I realized that there was a problem.

"Mistress?" I called into the other room. "With the cross further out from the wall, I don't think there's enough space to set out the bondage board on the floor. What do you want me to do?"

"Okay, then just set it up in here instead."

"Yes, Mistress."

I brought it back into our bedroom. "Where do you want it? Here next to the bed? Will you have enough room there?"

She considered for a moment. "If we close the door, is there enough room here in the alcove?"

I closed the door and laid out the board. "How does that look, Mistress?"

"Yeah, I think that will work."

"Okay. Now, you wanted floggers and paddles. Which ones?"

"Pick two of each."

"Yes, Mistress."

I went into our closet and picked out my two favorite floggers. One of them was the medium length suede one, which is great for warmups. The other was the long leather one, which is really intense once the warmup is over. I laid both of them out on the bed.

"Here are the floggers, Mistress. Now, you said paddles. Do you mean just the real paddles?" It's not always clear to me which implements she means by which terms.

"I mean the paddles. What else would I mean?"

"Well, I didn't know if you were including the new stuff we got recently."

"Like what?"

"Let's see, we've got a fairly stiff leather strap that's pretty similar to a paddle, and the thicker version of the same one. We've also got the pointed leather strap, a flexible leather strap, and a couple of tawses."

"Oh," she said, as if she had forgotten about all of that. "I guess get out two of everything."

"Two straps and two tawses? Or just two out of all of that?"

"Actually, get two straps and just one tawse. And the two paddles."

"Yes, Mistress." I went back into the closet to choose the paddles. This time, I debated a little more before making my choices. I could tell that Mistress was wanting to work me over pretty well, so I debated choosing the paddle with the small metal spikes on it, but in the end I chickened out. I chose the large leather paddle and another similar one with flat metal studs on it. I laid both of them out on the bed.

"Here are the paddles, Mistress."

Next, I went to choose the straps and the tawse. The tawse was easy; I knew that the single tawse would hurt plenty, so I took that one and left the double tawse in the closet. The straps required a bit more debate. I wasn't brave enough to select the flexible leather strap, especially since I knew I'd be getting the tawse anyway. But I did want Mistress to have at least some harsher implements, so I grabbed the pointed strap. I also grabbed the thicker leather strap, thinking that it would deliver some nice thuddy pain.

"Here you are, Mistress," I said, laying them out on the bed.

"Very good."

Next, I opened our toy drawer and started pulling out the other items she'd asked for, telling her each item as I pulled it out and laid it on the bed.

"Let's see, I need my collar. And you wanted my blindfold. And a gag. Which one do you want?"

"The one we used last time."

"Okay," I said, taking the gag out of its box. "And you wanted the cuffs and straps. Which ones do you want?"

"Take out all of the ones we used with the board before."

"We've done two different scenes with the board, Mistress, and you had me positioned a different way in each one, so we used a different set of cuffs for each one. I'm not sure which way you're going to have me tonight, so I don't know which ones to take out."

"Take out all of the ones we used with the board before," she repeated. I could tell from her tone that I was not understanding what she was saying, so I stopped to think for a moment.

"Oh, you mean every one that we used in either of those scenes?"

"Yes, exactly."

"Ah, okay. Sorry, Mistress, I didn't understand what you meant."

"I could tell," she said with dry amusement.

I smiled as I pulled out all of the cuffs and straps we'd used in the past. This included cuffs for my wrists, calves, and ankles, and a long set of straps for my midsection. I also brought out a few smaller straps that we'd just recently bought for my forearms. I laid them all out on the floor next to the bondage board.

"Okay, Mistress, they're all here. Anything else?"

"Let's see... Oh, the crop."

"Yes, Mistress," I said, taking that out as well, placing it on the bed next to all of the other implements.

I stood up, took off my boxers, and put on my collar. Then I looked down at the array of implements I'd laid out on the bed, and it suddenly hit me what was coming. I took a deep breath, trying to center myself and prepare mentally.

Mistress heard me breath. "Are you okay?"

"Yes, Mistress," I answered. "Just a little nervous looking at all of this."

"Come here," she ordered, her tone conveying how much she cared for me.

I went into the bathroom and kneeled down in front of her, putting my hands down on her knees, looking into her eyes. I was instantly reminded how much I loved and trusted her.

"Do you trust me?"

"Absolutely. I was just thinking to myself how much I trust you."

"Remember, we're doing this together. We'll go slow, and we'll communicate the whole way. We won't do anything that you can't handle."

"I know, Mistress. Thank you."

We hugged each other briefly. Then I got up to go wait in the play room.

"Take the toys with you," she said.

"Okay. All of them?"

She considered for a moment. "I guess one of each item. The rest you can leave here."

"What about the crop and the tawse? There's only one of each of those."

"Bring those with. We'll have to bring them back and forth with us."

"Yes, Mistress."

"And actually, bring both floggers. I know I'm going to want both to give you a good warmup."

"Yes, Mistress." I debated which of the other implements to bring. "Are we going to be starting in the other room or starting here?"

"In the other room."

That meant that whatever I brought there would be what we started with, and whatever I left in our room, I would be getting later.

I chose to bring the plain leather paddle, leaving the metal studded one behind, since the leather one would be a better warmup. But I made the opposite choice with the straps: I brought the pointed strap and left the thicker strap behind, because I was scared of the pointed strap and didn't know if I'd be able to handle it once I'd already taken a lot of abuse.

I went into the play room. I set down the paddle, strap, crop, and tawse on the futon next to the cross, and I hung the two floggers on the back of the doorknob. Then I grabbed a pillow, set it down on the floor, and kneeled down on it to wait for Mistress.

She soon came into the room and positioned me on the cross, facing outward. She fastened the restraints around my wrists and ankles and then smiled at me.

We looked into each other's eyes. I loved seeing that smile on her face, the one that told me how much she loved my willingness to give up so much control to her.

She stepped back and picked up her suede flogger. She started flogging my chest with a simple circular motion, sometimes moving down and surprising me by striking the sides of my legs. She was using mostly lighter strikes, warming me up, but interspersing harder strikes in between to keep me guessing.

Angling the cross back so far did seem to be helping; I did not seem to be getting lightheaded so far, even with the impact play. Mistress seemed pleased that she was able to keep going without having to worry so much about me passing out.

One thing we did have to adjust to was that with the cross angled so far back, her strikes had to reach further forward from where she was standing in order to hit my chest. At one point, after a particularly hard strike on my chest with the flogger, I instinctively tilted my head forward to cover the spot she'd hit protectively, but she was already delivering a follow-on strike to the same spot -- which meant that it wound up hitting my lip and chin! It didn't do any real damage though, and we were both a bit more careful after that -- me to not get my head in the way, and her to watch out in case I wasn't careful enough.

She kept flogging me for a while, eventually switching to the long-tail leather flogger. The bite of the leather was harsher than the suede flogger had been, as it always is, but by then I was warmed up enough that it was tolerable. But I could definitely feel my skin stinging with each strike.

When she was done flogging me, I was still doing okay, so she moved on to the crop. She cropped both sides of my chest, randomly changing where she struck me and how hard she hit. I cried out on the harder strikes, but I loved how much she was enjoying it.

After a few minutes of that, she switched to the paddle, still randomly changing the targets and strength of her blows. Then she started periodically switching back and forth between the paddle and the crop. The whole time, she was focusing on both sides of my chest. My skin was turning red, and I could feel it stinging badly with every strike.

Next, she picked up the pointed strap. I was expecting her to continue abusing my poor aching chest, but she switched her target area to surprise me. She struck the side of my leg, causing the pointed tip of the strap to wrap around my leg. It was really painful, and I cried out in surprise! She seemed a bit surprised that it hurt that much, but I think she was also enjoying it. She gave me a few more strikes on my legs before switching implements again.

The next implement was the tawse, which she used to continue striking my legs. It was really painful, so she only gave me a few strokes there. Then she switched back to targeting my chest, although she seemed to be using slightly lighter blows there -- or maybe the tawse is just inherently more painful on an area with more padding? I'm not sure.

Finally, she was done. She unfastened my restraints and checked in to make sure I was still okay. I was pleased to report that I really hadn't experienced any lightheadedness; angling the cross back had clearly worked.

We went back into our bedroom, taking all of our toys with us. I laid them back out on the bed.

"Put on your cuffs."

"Yes, Mistress."

She watched as I complied. "I really love watching you put on your cuffs. It's like you're preparing yourself for me."

I smiled. I absolutely loved hearing that she enjoyed it.

When I was finished buckling my cuffs on, she positioned me on my arms and knees on the bondage board, facing away from the bed. She walked around me and clipped my cuffs into place.

She walked back behind me, and I could hear her pick up the first implement off of the bed. It turned out to be her suede flogger, which I felt a moment later as she started striking my ass with it, once again warming me up with a simple circular motion.

After a while, she switched to some harder overhand strikes. She even landed a few blows on my upper back. I could see her feet as she walked around to my sides occasionally, always looking for a better angle to strike me from.

The next implement was the thicker leather strap. She struck my ass with it repeatedly, randomly changing the exact spot she was striking and the strength of her blows. I cried out with several of the harder strikes, bucking my hips away as I felt my skin really start to sting.

She switched implements again, and I jumped and cried out as I felt the stripe of the tawse across my already-stinging ass. But Mistress seemed to be enjoying my cries of pain; she didn't back off on the strength of her blows, although she also didn't stick with the tawse for too long before she moved to the next implement.

She paused at this point to reach down between my legs and take my balls in her fist. I stayed very still, wanting her to feel my compliance, trusting her to make me feel whatever she wanted to, even in that most sensitive area. I enjoyed the feeling of her hands on me, even as I felt her start to pull and squeeze my balls. She gave me a few hard tugs and hard squeezes that made me grunt, but overall I was loving the intimate attention.

However, she didn't let me enjoy it for more than a minute or so. She released my balls and picked up the next implement, which turned out to be the long-tail leather flogger. She continued to focus on my ass, starting with a simple circular motion, but gradually switching to stronger overhand blows. My ass was starting to hurt really badly as she battered it with blow after blow.

After a little while, I saw her feet move alongside of me, and she continued striking my ass from different positions. I realized that she was experimenting, trying to find the best angle from which to flog me. Finally, she wound up positioning her foot underneath me, right below where my elbow was secured to the bondage board.

I don't have any sort of foot fetish, but somehow in that moment, I was overwhelmed with a sudden desire to express my submission by kissing her foot, so I leaned down to my side and started doing just that. She hadn't really intended for me to do that -- she told me later that she was just looking for a better angle to strike me from, and it hadn't even occurred to her that I might do that, but she did really like it. And I loved it too -- I couldn't believe how submissive it made me feel to express my devotion to her that way! It was both an incredibly intimate moment for both of us and a really nice distraction from the pain.

She struck my ass with the flogger a few more times as I continued to kiss every part of her foot that I could reach. When she'd had enough worshipping on that foot, she shifted her position so that her other foot was in the same place, and I gladly gave that foot the same treatment. She continued flogging my ass all the while.

It's really hard to describe how I felt in that moment. I was literally worshipping the feet of the woman who was actively causing me pain. It sounds crazy to me, even now, but I felt so secure, so complete, so loved. There was nowhere else in the world that I would have rather been. I felt submissive, loved, and cared for. I felt like she was rewarding my devotion to her by accepting my submission, by letting herself take advantage of what I was offering her in a way that pleased her. And I felt proud. I felt like I was demonstrating my devotion to her in a way that most other people would never have done, showing her in the most visceral way how much I loved her.

Finally, thought, she removed her foot and walked back behind me, picking up a new implement from the bed. A moment later, I felt the sharp sting of her crop striking my ass. As usual, its light weight allowed her to hit me even harder on my already-red ass cheeks, and I cried out and bucked my hips with each blow. She seemed to take delight in hitting the same spot on each cheek over and over again, not even giving me time to absorb the pain of the previous strike before the next one landed.

I think most of my attention must have been focused on the pain she was giving me, because I didn't notice her switch to a new toy, but I did suddenly feel the blows of a paddle on my ass. From the feel of it, I realized that it must have been the metal-studded paddle. I could feel the sharp blows of the metal studs as they struck my cheeks, making them sting even more. I cried out with several of the sharper blows.

The next implement was the strap with the pointed tip. It was just as painful on my already raw ass as it had been on my legs earlier. I cried out each time she struck my ass with it, instinctively arching away from each blow. I was really starting to struggle with the pain at this point, but I also knew how much she was enjoying this, and I truly wanted to satisfy her.

I suddenly saw her foot appear on one side of me and then her other foot appear on the other side. She squatted down and sat on my ass! I grunted under the weight, but she didn't give me time to adjust -- instead, she started striking my shoulders with the pointed strap. I bucked and cried out with the pain of each impact. But I actually did like her sitting on me -- not so much the physical sensation, but what it represented in terms of my submission to her and her willingness to accept that submission. And at least she wasn't striking my ass anymore!

Of course, as soon as that thought crossed my mind, she reached around behind herself and started striking my ass cheeks again. I cried out in renewed pain, each blow exacerbating the accumulated pain from everything she had already done to my ass.

She got up to switch implements again. Then she came back and sat down on my ass again. This time, she was at an angle that put a little bit too much pressure on my knee, which was a little distracting. But that was a small thing compared to the overall feeling of submission that I got from her using me like a piece of furniture. It was really amazing.

At this point, I had lost track of which implements we had already used, so I didn't remember what the last one was, but it turned out to be the leather paddle. She struck my shoulders a few times, and then she again reached behind herself to paddle my ass. The pain was intense by this point, but I was still feeling so fulfilled by the way she was using me for her pleasure.

When she was finally finished, I didn't want the scene to end! She first disconnected my legs and then my arms. As soon as she was done with my arms, I hugged her leg and kissed her foot some more. She let me do that for a few moments before stopping me.

"Alright, come on, let's snuggle."

She went to sit down on the edge of the bed, and I kneeled down on the floor in front of her.

"Let's take off your cuffs."

I started to do it, but she stopped me. "Let me do it."

"Yes, Mistress."

I leaned back and lifted my leg so that she could get at it. She undid the cuffs from my ankle and calf. Then I gave her the other leg to repeat the process. Finally, she removed the cuffs and straps from my wrists and forearms.

Then she went to remove my collar, and I whimpered almost instinctually at the idea of taking it off. "You want your collar to stay on?"

"Yes, Mistress," I said. "I'm not ready for it to come off."

"Okay," she said lovingly. "Come here."

She pulled me up to her. I put my arms around her, and she held me for a bit as we ramped down. It had been an incredible scene.

We did have a couple of follow-up conversations worth mentioning. One of them was about my need for more after-care; she did hold me for a little while afterward, but then she decided to get up to take a shower, and I really could have used her arms around me for a bit longer. She apologized and said that she'd try to keep that in mind in the future. We joked about the fact that in our relationship, she's the stereotypical guy and I'm the stereotypical girl: she gets bored once we're done and wants to go take a shower, whereas I just want to be held.

Another thing that I asked her about was that, although this scene had been so intense, I think for both of us, it didn't seem to have been sexual for her. I knew from posts I'd seen on FetLife that there were people for whom sadism is totally non-sexual, and I was trying to figure out if she was one of them. But for me, as amazing as it had been, it somehow felt not quite complete without the opportunity to pleasure her sexually. She said that she really wasn't sure whether it was non-sexual for her or whether she just was too focused on what she was doing to me to have been monitoring her own arousal. We didn't really know how to solve this, but we resolved to keep thinking about it and talking about it.