Send in the Clowns Ch. 01

We all went into the Main Hall, and Briscoe pressed a button by the door to the side room. A door of what looked like iron bars, very much like a jail cell door, slid into place.

"The side rooms are closed, but the guards can see inside." said Briscoe. "Now keep this part under your hats, but the bars of that door are a coating of steel over some kind of filament fiber that is heatproof to temperatures that would melt any metal, even tungsten. Another BOW Enterprises nanotechnology product, so I'm told."

I said loudly "Sheriff, we have got to get us some of those!" Everyone broke out laughing.

The Sheriff replied "If we ever have to keep the Statue of Artemis in County Jail, I'll authorize it."

"Commander," said Rudistan with great joviality, "you need a crowbar made out of that stuff."

"I dunno, Rudistan." I said. "The 'Filament Crowbar' just doesn't sound as sexy as the 'Iron Crowbar'."

"Point well taken." Tanya said with a grin as some people chuckled.

We made our way to the new back room, immediately behind the Main Hall. Briscoe said "Okay, before we go see where the Statue of Artemis and other immensely valuable artifacts like the gold mummy mask that came over with the Statue in 1954 are, I have to explain some background."

Briscoe: "The side rooms's outer walls are the walls of the building to the outside. They're rebar-reinforced granite and it would be Herculean task, but theoretically someone could drive up with a big backhoe and carve a hole in the wall. That would destroy the paintings inside, and of course we'd be able to respond PDQ to an assault of that nature. But we're being as secure as possible so that we can reassure the Governor and the Legislature that the Statue of Artemis will be totally safe here."

Briscoe: "The Security Room is behind the Main Hall, and behind that, against the back wall of the building, are a warehouse work space on the first floor. and the Kitchen and Administrative Offices on the second floor. Accessibility is limited, especially on the second floor. They were going to have a balcony walkway along the length of the walls on the sides, looking down on the Main Hall, but they nixed that so that no one could stand there and cut a hole in the wall and take a painting or artifact out from the back side."

"Commissioner Briscoe," I asked, "are there any secret passages from room to room?"

"No, not that we know of." said Briscoe. "But you bring up a very interesting point, Commander. As the renovations were being started, the construction company doing the work reported that there was a hidden, sealed space between the Main Hall and the Security Room.

Briscoe: "At first we thought it might have been an area for all the wiring involved with security, but when the wall was breached at one end, we found a totally empty room. The walls against the Main Hall and the Security Room were lined with sandstone, so we thought that maybe it was meant to be a hidden secure area decorated to show the Egyptian artifacts. But the room was not on any of the architectural drawings nor floor plans."

Briscoe: "Someone suggested we could convert that space into a secure area for the Statue of Artemis, that people could come in one side and out the other, like the side rooms are with their doors near each end. And as such, we could display the Statue in a glass box, where it could be much more easily seen and appreciated."

Briscoe: "The sandstone was chipped in a few places, so the construction company took the sandstone out and built in the security features that are in place and in operation now."

As he had been talking, he'd led us to a doorway on the right side of the building. We all walked through, seeing the gold mummy mask, which looked similar to the famous King Tut mask, and intricate jewelry pieces of gold and large jewels. The glass case in the middle was empty, waiting for the Statue of Artemis. There was an alcove in the wall behind it, where the Statue inside its casing could be stored for added security.

"Very nice." said Pottsville PD Lt. Shane O'Brady. "Much more accommodating than what we've got in the Pottsville Museum, and still very secure." I nodded in agreement, not saying out loud how the Pottsville Museum's defenses had been breached, and the Statue of Artemis taken out but fortunately not whisked away. (Author's note: 'Pink Panther', Ch. 01.)

Cindy Ross came up to me and said quietly "I'm feeling a vibe out of you."

"Yes, yes you are. We'll talk later." I replied very quietly, clenching my jaw so that my words came out of my unmoving mouth. Cindy got the hint and didn't ask any more about it.

After touring the Security Room, we congregated in the Main Hall again. "Commissioner Briscoe," Jack Muscone asked, "what happens if the electricity goes out? I'm asking in the context of trying to figure out how criminals might defeat the motion sensors and alarms."

Briscoe replied "The Museum has a generator backup that's identical to what the Campus Police Headquarters has. The security systems also have a redundant battery backup, which should give about 12 extra hours of keeping the systems running. Anything longer, and it's probably a disaster for the whole County, like a tornado coming through or something. And unless that tornado directly hits the Museum building and destroys it, the side rooms and back room doors will be shut and locked, and Security on scene."

I asked "Are the videocameras hardwired, or on wifi?"

Briscoe said "They're all hardwired; we did listen to your advice on that, Commander." There were a few chuckles as I gave him a thumbs-up, then Briscoe said "But we also put in some radio signal transmitters that trigger a wifi signal if any of the alarms go off. That's in case the Security Room is compromised and they somehow shut off the hardwired cameras."

"I just have one more question, simply out of sheer curiosity." I said. "Who was the construction company and the contractor for the renovation?"

"Uh, I'll have to check with the Curator." said Briscoe. When we asked him, the Curator said he did not remember the company name, and that he'd have to check with the University's Properties Department, which is responsible for construction and maintenance of all the University's properties and roads.

After the security tour was completed and we were looking around, Jack Muscone came up to me and said "Well, Don, how would you defeat the security here, and steal the Lost Greuze or the Statue of Artemis?"

I knew what he was really asking, having noticed that Muscone had been acting almost paranoid and jittery about the security, and noticing that he'd asked a ton of questions about it. And since I was no longer an FBI Consultant, he had to pick my brain in the here and now.

I replied "I'll tell you, on one condition: you must promise on your children's lives that you will not discuss what I say on any cellphone, not to the EAD, not to anyone. And that's because the Swamp Frogs can listen in and learn what you've said. And I for one don't want to help the Swamp Frogs steal anything."

"What about Aurus?" Jack replied. "He can't get into cellphone conversations... can he?"

"Not like the Swamp Frogs can." I said. "And Jack, I don't know why you're giving any credence to that bogus intel report. It won't be George Aurus or any gang he has trying to steal the Greuze nor anything else."

That caused Jack to do a double-take as he peered at me. "Okay, then. What weaknesses do you see?"

"None. The security is excellent." I replied. "But let me ask you this question: when will the Greuze be at its most vulnerable? And at what time of day or night would you try to steal it?"

Teresa, Laura, and Shane O'Brady were standing next to us, and Cindy and Karina were within earshot, as well. Teresa said "Oh, I get it. It'll be vulnerable when it's out of it's little alcove in the side room."

Jack said "Yes, but it'll only be out for the auction, when there are a lot of people around."

"Exactly." I said. "And it may seem to be a paradox, but that's when it's most vulnerable. At night, when no one is here, and the security is full-on? That would take a big-time inside job, including co-opting the Campus Police Officer or Officers monitoring from their Headquarters."

"That's a good point." said Shane O'Brady.

Teresa added: "It's definitely most very good for the world that you're on the Good Guys's side, sir." I nodded vigorously in agreement.

Jack said "Soooo, if someone is going to steal the Greuze, it'll be Saturday?"

"That's my suggestion." I said. "But it's just that, and only because you asked. No guarantees that I'll be 100% right 100% of the time."

Strangely enough, it was Laura that had been peering at me the hardest all that time...

Part 4 - "Loose Lips Sink Ships"

When we got back to Headquarters, I had Teresa, Claire Michaels, Jerome Davis, and Micah Rudistan follow me into the Intel Room, where Mary Milton already was.

"Mary," I said quietly to Lt. Milton after taking her aside, "I want you to handle this one personally. I want you to get in touch with whoever at the University is responsible for such things, and get the name of the construction crew that did the Museum refurbishing project. Once you have that, check into them and all their employees as discreetly but as thoroughly as you can."

"Yes sir." Mary said. "Anything in particular I'm looking for?"

"No." I said. "I don't want to bias you in any way. And remember that the Swamp Frogs might have their ears tuned to this, so don't do anything (air quotes) 'untoward' that lets them know what you are doing. And now, I'm going to egregiously go over your head and give your people an assignment."

"Please do, sir." Mary said agreeably.

"Okay, everyone," I said loudly, "I've got an assignment for you, and I'll just say it to all you and your leadership here in one fell swoop. Your task is to find out everything you can about George Aurus, the Black Velvet serial killer. But here's the rub: I want all of you, especially you newer guys that weren't here when we captured Aurus the first time, to research him as if you'd never heard of him before."

YIC: "Gather all you can from outside sources before reading my case notes at the time. Also look into his most recent escape from Federal Supermax prison a little over a year ago, and see if you can find anything at all of where he's been and what he's been doing since he escaped. Any questions?"

There were none.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

None of the Federal Agents had come to Police Headquarters after the lunch and tour, but several others had, among them Norm Chow, Karina White, and Shane O'Brady. The Sheriff and Chief Deputy Sheriff had also come over to Headquarters, and were talking with Chief Moynahan in his office. Shane came into my office while the others admired the Intel Center and then gathered in Classroom 'E'.

"Sooo..." I said after pouring us cups of coffee and sitting down, "you wanna work for the SBI, do ya?"

"I'm not sure." said O'Brady. "There's pluses and minuses. First, let me tell you the two positions I was offered. One is the SBI-OER Lieutenant for one of the six regions the State is divided into. Karina has the northwest region, which includes your Town & County. Norm Chow is Britt Maxwell's overall assistant, and he also has the northeast region, which includes The City, Westphalia and Eastphalia, and Pottsville. So there's Midtown, Southport, Rocktown in the Southeast, and the southern region, which includes Jacksonville State Prison and goes east all the way along the southern State Line."

O'Brady: "The other position is what Director Wes Masters talked to me about. As you know, the SBI is divided into departments, which include Immigration and Drug Enforcement (IDE); the Bureau of Firearms and Explosives (BFE); State Tax Enforcement (STE), which also handles 'Alcohol' instead of BFE; the Office of Financial Investigations (OFI); and the Office of Ethics and Review (OER)."

I nodded and O'Brady continued: "Theoretically, every SBI Agent below Lieutenant has to be in one of those branches. But there are gaps in the coverage. Who helps local jurisdictions with murder cases? Gambling, and prostitution?"

I said "Yes, we've had those problems in the past. I've talked to a number of people, and my idea has been to create an (air quotes) 'at large' division that can fill those gaps where and when needed. But those that already hate the SBI make one very, very good argument: in the wrong hands, that 'at-large' unit could be as bad if not worse than the old Narcotics Task Force was under Jack Lewis."

O'Brady said "Well, Masters is floating the idea of having Agents that will be assigned to the various departments, but can be called together to help in other areas. Like what Terence Johnson has been doing. Masters wants me to be the Lieutenant that coordinates that, puts the teams together, leads them if need be."

I said "Well, that may be on sketchy legal grounds. I remember the Dems howling and trying to gin up impeachment charges against Governor Jared for allegedly spending SBI money illegally. They could easily start whining at Governor Marshall for that same thing."

Shane nodded, and I then said "So are you looking to leave Pottsville PD?"

"No, not at all." said Shane, and maybe a little stronger than he needed to. "In fact, that's the dilemma. I just made Lieutenant, things are going really well for us, Hammonds is weakening politically, and he's going to be primaried in the next election. But going to the SBI, helping Masters and Maxwell and you clean the place up? After what I saw in your last case, with the City P.D. corruption, the Federal corruption, and of course the political corruption, I see a bigger fight worth fighting, and I want to fight it with you guys."

"Keep talking like that, and you'll be getting a Guardians of Justice t-shirt in the mail." I said with a grin. "And then Derrick B. Harland will send his FBI Gestapo enforcers to accuse you of being a White Nationalist and arrest you."

"And I know you're not kidding." said Shane O'Brady. "It's unbelievable that this country has descended to that level. And no one calls the bastard out."

"You're right." I said. "Especially the group that is supposed to be calling out that corruption, but is actually more corrupt: the American Mainstream Media. Anyhoo, I probably don't have to tell you to wait until the Legislature passes a Budget, be it by March 31st or in a Special Session afterwards."

"You think that'll happen?" O'Brady asked. "The Governor will call a Special Session?" I just shrugged my shoulders, palms of my hands upwards...

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

O'Brady and I moseyed over to Classroom 'E', followed closely by the Sheriff, Chief Deputy Sheriff, and Police Chief. Already present were Karina White, Norm Chow, Terence Johnson, James Tarleton, Claire Michaels, Jerome Davis, and Micah Rudistan.

"Soooo..." said Karina White with a twinkle in her eye, "do I have a new colleague?" She meant Shane O'Brady possibly joining her as an SBI Lieutenant.

"Not until a Budget is passed." said O'Brady. "If they do get one passed, then we'll see." Karina nodded in agreement, though not vigorously.

"Sir," said Claire Michaels, "we were talking about Mr. Muscone at that tour. He really seemed agitated. Does he know something we don't?"

I replied "I strongly suspect SAC Muscone has been told by higher-ups that he is personally responsible for the safety of the Greuze, and that if something happens to it, it will be held against him. So yes, he's worried more than he should be."

The Chief asked "So you don't think the Greuze is in any real danger?"

"With respect, Chief," I replied, "don't read more into my words than what I actually said. When I say Muscone is more worried than he should be, I did not mean that as an implication that the Greuze is not in danger."

Cindy said "You told Muscone that the Greuze will be in more danger during the exhibition. Is that when you think Aurus and his gang will go after it?"

There was a long moment of very awkward silence. I had bowed my head down, mostly to get my anger under control, lest I go off on some people in a most very embarrassing way. Everyone else was realizing the faux pas Cindy had made.

Finally I looked up and said, in as quiet and level a voice as I could, "I really wish you had not said that out loud." Then I said a little more loudly "And I'm going to ask... no, beg each and every one of you that heard it... to not repeat it to anyone, especially on a cell phone. If you do, the Swamp Frogs will use that against us in their plans to steal the Greuze."

"You mean George Aurus, don't you?" asked Cindy, and very strongly.

"No." I said with studied calmness. "Aurus is not the greedy son of a bitch that Brendan Chapel is." There were gasps in the room at that; not everyone knew what I knew about the country's Director of National Intelligence.

"Care to elaborate, Mr. Crowbarrrr?" asked Chief Moynahan. "Especially about the Greuze being in danger?"

It really wasn't a request, but I still said "No sir, I do not care to say anything further about it at this time..."

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

"What in the hell." Chief Moynahan said. He was in his usual seat at the near end of the table in the Chief's Conference Room. To his left was me, and to my left was Lt. Cmdr. Teresa Croyle. To the Chief's right was Chief Deputy Cindy Ross, and to her right was Sheriff Griswold.

I had been called in to 'explain' my words and actions in Classroom 'E'. Cindy was staring daggers at me as the Chief said "Don, we're trying to prevent a crime, something the Police rarely have the chance to do. And if you have ideas that can help us prevent that crime, we need to hear them."

"And you sure as hell don't need to embarrass me like that in front of everyone." Cindy snarled. I did not need to be Carole to 'feeeeel her anngerrrrr', to quote Emperor Palpatine in 'Star Wars'.

"That embarrassed you?" I replied venomously. "That was nothing compared to what I wanted to say. And if you had kept your God damned mouth shut, then we wouldn't be having this conversation, much less the risk of leaks we have now!"

"For God's sake!" Cindy all but shouted. "There's a threat to the Greuze, here! And if I can't ask you to confirm what you said to an FBI Agent in front of other people we're supposed to trust, there's something really, really wrong here! And it ain't me that was wrong!"

I said "Oh, I admit it... I was the one that was wrong." Then I elaborated: "I was wrong to answer Jack's question at all. I was wrong to answer it in front of others. I was wrong to say anything. And because I did, the Swamp Frogs might succeed in stealing the Greuze."

"Crowbar," growled Sheriff Griswold, "who in that room did you not trust?"

"With respect, Sheriff," I said, "that was not the issue nor is the issue now. I trust everyone in that room. But I also made Muscone promise not to talk about it on a cellphone, and if anyone in there talks about it on a cellphone, Brendan Chapel will get word of it; the Matheson case showed that they have that power. " (Author's note: 'Price No Object', Ch. 04)

Cindy was not mollified. At all. She said angrily "I should still be able to ask that in front of that trusted without you coming down on me like you did. Would you have treated Teresa like that if she had asked that------"

"Don't you dare bring me into this like that!" Teresa yelled, practically coming out of her chair. "Especially not to cover up for your betrayal of Don!"