Send in the Clowns Ch. 01

"Okay, thanks for coming." said Julius Jefferson. "We've got until noon to get this security briefing done and the walkthrough with it."

Julius began: "The Campus Police and Sheriff's Department will be handing the parking lot and the entrances to the building, and we'll have some Sheriff's Deputies along with Museum Security in strategic places, such as the entrances to the upstairs side rooms and the doors from the Main Hall to the back areas. There will be metal detector gates and x-ray machines in the front lobby area, just like an airport or The Masters golf tournament."

Julius Jefferson: "Federal Agents in plainclothes will be among the guests, patrolling unobtrusively. This conference room will be our command post. Museum Security will occupy the Security Room and monitor the videocameras, and the Campus Police will also monitor the cameras from their Headquarters."

Julius Jefferson: "What is going to happen is that the Greuze will be taken out of its alcove in the wall under they eyes of at least two security guards and the gentleman who is going to verify its authenticity. It will be brought out the door into the Main Hall, and put on an easel next to the door, and from that point on at least two security officers will be stationed next to the painting. There will be a velvet rope barricade in front of the painting, but it will be close enough that people can get close to the painting and be able to see it, but they can't crowd it or easily touch it."

Jefferson: "While the painting is out and in the Main Hall, it will be at its most vulnerable, and that's when we will need to be on our toes and at our most watchful. Our plainclothes Federal Agents will be positioned nearby. and will be watching the attendees."

Jefferson: "In the highly unlikely event something happens, the Museum will be locked down. The outer doors will lock automatically. The painting will not be touched, but will be surrounded by Federal Agents, and returned to its alcove under at least two-man control, with as many eyes on it as possible. Everyone else involved in security will be given an assignment of what to do if the alarm is given, and we'll give those assignments during the walk-through. Are there any questions to this point?"

I had passed Teresa a note, and she stood up and said "In the event someone throws a smoke or tear gas grenade, people will panic and there could be serious injuries or worse if they stampede but the doors are locked. Is there any contingency for that?"

Jefferson replied: "I would hope that no one will be able to smuggle such a device past the security devices that everyone will be required to pass through to get in. But we'll take it into consideration. The valuables are the most important thing, and once the Greuze is secured, we can unlock the front doors so that people can get out."

And then Your Iron Crowbar stood up. And in the words of the legendary Beetlejuice: "it's showtime!"

I said: "Considering that I've been told repeatedly that George Aurus is the greatest threat to stealing the Greuze, can you tell me how George Aurus escaped from Federal Supermax prison the last time?"

Jefferson had a quizzical look on his face as he said "With all due respect, Commander, I don't see how that has any relevance to what we're discussing now."

I made my voice sound very formal as I said "Special Agent Jefferson, by now you know me well enough to know that if I'm taking the time to ask the question, it very much is both relevant to this situation, and very, very important. How did Aurus escape?"

Jefferson was rescued by EAD Owen Lange, who stood up, turned to face me, and said 
"Not only is that not relevant right now, it's classified information. And as such, it can't be discussed in this meeting nor in this unsecure setting."

"Yes sir, you are right: it is classified... classified Top Secret and compartmentalized. I have a Top Secret clearance, but I don't have the compartmentalization authorization to see that information. Why is Aurus's escape classified the same way as some of our Nation's most vital secrets, sir? And again, it is very, very relevant to the potential threat to the Greuze."

As murmurs began cropping up throughout the room, a voice cut through the room from the doorway: "It's classified because it's on a need-to-know basis."

We turned to see that the speaker was FBI Special Agent In Charge Bob Rovers, head of the Rovers BAU Team! He continued, his voice as condescending as he could make it: "And you do not have the need to know that information, Troy."

"If you say so." I said. "And that means my presence here is no longer needed." I stepped in front of the Sheriff and Cindy to get to the aisle and began walking to the door to leave. Teresa had gotten up and was walking right behind me.

"Wait a minute, dammit!" yelled Owen Lange. "What's going on, Commander? Why the hell are you asking that?"

I turned and faced him, standing practically at attention. "Because, sir, despite what this asshole says," I said, pointing at Bob Rovers, "I do have the need to know. And so do all of you." And without further ado, I turned and brushed past Bob Rovers and out the door, followed by Teresa.

As we walked across the parking lot to my Police SUV, I said "Thank you for not asking. And yes, I'll tell you everything. Let's go sit on the deck of The Cabin before we go back to Headquarters..."

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

At The Cabin, I fixed the cats their food while Teresa poured us two glasses of iced tea. We went onto the deck and I put the food down for the cats, who were surprised and most very curious cats as to why we were here at this time. Their curiosity did not stop them from eating the food, of course.

We sat down, looking out over our Town & County in the valley below, me on the metal mesh loveseat, and Teresa in the metal chair to my left. "Okay, I'll tell you what's really going on, here."

"Tell me, too."

The voice was Sheriff Antonio Griswold's, and it connoted that he was 'not amused' with me. He walked up to us and said "And it better be good, Crowbar. Good enough to stop me from tearing you a new asshole for that stunt you just pulled down there."

"Have a seat, Sheriff. You need to hear this, too..."

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

2:00pm, Thursday, March 18th. EAD Owen Lange, SAC Jack Muscone, and SSA Julius Jefferson were in the Main Conference Room at Police Headquarters. Chief Sean Moynahan was in his usual seat at the near-end of the table. To his left was me, with Teresa to my left. Deputy Chief Tanya P. Muscone was parked to the Chief's right, across from me.

EAD Owen Lange said "I appreciate you guys giving us a few minutes to discuss this situation. I admit that I really wanted to ask you for another round in the ring, Commander... but I also think I know why you asked that, and the way you did."

"With respect, Mr. EAD, no you don't." I replied, "If you did know, you would not be here right now."

Owen Lange said "Possibly. And just so you know, I can't access the files on Aurus's escape, either. And that sanctimonious asshole Bob Rovers said he can't authorize me to see it, that it has to come from the NSA or the DNI himself."

"And that in itself should tell you all you need to know about this case." I replied. The Federal Agents looked confused, then Lange recovered, as did Jack Muscone.

"Look, Don," Jack Muscone said, "they don't want to say it out loud, but this may be the best chance we've had at capturing George Aurus and returning him to prison since he escaped. Bob Rovers's BAU Team has been assigned the Aurus case, and yes, I know your evaluation of them. The thing is, the whole Bureau thinks the same way about them, and they know it, too. And they know they need this to restore their useless reputation------ what?"

He had seen my eyes become jet at that. I said "You're right about their reputation... and they earned that reputation again and again. I just don't understand why anyone beyond their masters, the Swamp Frogs, would want to give them another chance. At all."

Owen Lange said "We don't. But we do want to get Aurus out of circulation and back in prison before we begin finding more bodies in black velvet wrappers. And since the enemy of my enemy is my friend, I'm willing to work with the Rovers BAU to bring Aurus down. And I'm not expecting you to actively help, but I hope you're on our side about this."

I said "I wish you the best of luck, sir. And while I have no intention of trying to hunt down Aurus... unless he comes into my County, of course... it is not bravado for me to say that I would find him before the 'vaunted' Rovers BAU does."

"Will you be at the exhibition and the auction on Saturday?" Jack Muscone asked.

"Yes." I replied. "As Dr. Laura Fredricson's husband. She's the University's hostess for the event in Dr. Wellman's stead."

"Soooo," said Tanya with a wicked gleam in her eye, "does this mean that Laura is going to be the next University President? Enquiring minds want to know."

"Time will tell." I said, once again leaving more questions than answers...

Part 6 - Sending In The Clowns

"I thought that you'd want what I want
Sorry, my dear
But where are the clowns?
Quick, send in the clowns
Don't bothеr, they're herе..."
------ Stephen Sondheim, 'Send In The Clowns'

9:40am, Saturday, March 20th. Laura and I arrived at the Museum for the Lost Greuze Exhibition and Auction. You remember that striped dress that some saw as blue and gray, and others as gold and white? Laura was wearing something very similar, with navy blue stripes alternating with gray, and navy blue high heel pumps that shaped her magnificent legs to (my standard of) perfection. It did not bother me at all that the heels made her taller than me; after all, I'm the one taking her to bed every night and laying the pipe to her.

I was wearing my dark gray suit with a white shirt and light blue necktie with little TCPD logos on it. I had my gun in its holster under my armpit, and my TCPD Badge on my belt. I had been allowed to bring my gun through the security line.

In the lobby, I saw the Deputies at their stations at the stairs, preventing anyone from going to the second floor. The conference room door to the left was closed, with a sign on it saying 'Authorized Personnel Only'. The Feds were set up in there.

To the right, I saw the Gift Shop with a youngish man behind the counter. Behind him were two replicas of the Lost Greuze. The one on the left had a price tag on it that said '$100'. The one of the right had a red tag with the word 'SOLD' in white letters.

Inside the Main Hall, I noticed the semicircular velvet rope line near the front-end door of the side room, and an easel behind the velvet ropes. The Greuze would be brought out later on and put there.

There were tables set up, just as they had been during our lunch a few days before, but only on the left half of the Main Hall. I also observed the table on the opposite side, the left side of the Main Hall, where a young woman and a young man dressed as a University Conference Center servers were offering people glasses of champagne and snacks. Another woman dressed as a server was carrying circular tray with glasses of champagne around the room.

My practiced eye easily spotted the Federal Agents posing as guests, some doing a much better job than others at blending in with the crowd. I saw a slender man with graying hair and beard, wearing glasses, talking to a middle-aged couple that showed every sign of being wealthy.

Other people were coming in, some dressed very nicely, a few dressed a bit too casually for the occasion. Some were University Faculty members, as all of the Faculty had been invited. When Dr. Richard Searles arrived, Laura had me come over.

"Don, you know Dr. Searles." my wife said. "And this is his fiancée, Mia McNamara." Mia was a lovely blonde woman. She was an actress, and looked much shorter in person than she did on television and in the movies. She was dressed tastefully but elegantly, and I was not sure how she was walking on the very high heel pumps she was wearing (not that I was complaining, mind you).

"It's very nice to finally meet you." I said as I took Mia's hand in mine and bowed slightly over it. "My nephew's brother is the actor Benny Black, and he's said many good things about you. And of course Dr. Searles has, as well."

"Benny is a great guy." Mia said. "He's become the hot star of 'Days of Promise'. He kept the show from getting canceled." After another minute of conversation about Mia's new movie project, Laura presented them to another couple and 'dragged' me along to talk to Todd and Teresa, who'd just come in. Teresa cleans up very nicely, and was every bit as beautiful in her 'little black dress' and high heel pumps as Todd was handsome in his expensive suit. They were a great couple, I thought to myself.

After a moment, Laura said "We need to go over and pay our respects to Mrs. Baker."

We went over to where Ruth Heidelmann Baker was sitting, sipping champagne. "Why hello, Dr. Fredricson." the 90-year-old woman said.

"Hello, Mrs. Baker. May I present my husband, Commander Donald Troy?" Laura said. "I was telling you how his great-grandmother and his grandmother escaped the Nazis."

"It's an honor to meet you, ma'am." I said politely as I extended my hand. To my surprise, the old lady grabbed my hand to help herself get out of her chair. "Oh, please, don't get up on my account." I said.

"I must insist, Commander." Ruth said. She held onto my hand and arm for support as she said " I have heard of all the things you have done in support of the Jewish People, and what your sister is doing on their behalf, as well." I was stunned; most people would have no way of knowing my sister Elizabeth's role with the Mossad.

Mrs. Baker continued: "I know of your parachute jump with the 55th Israeli Paras, and your visit to Massada Mountain." (Author's note: 'We'll Always Have Paris', Ch. 02.) "You are greatly respected in Israel, and I share their respect for you."

"That's very kind of you, ma'am." I said. "As one of those Jewish People, I am honored to have been able to be of service. And I appreciate all you've done in your life on their behalf. If I may ask, how did you come to be in possession of the Lost Greuze."

Mrs. Baker was tiring, so as I asked the question I deftly guided her to sit back down, and I sat down in the chair next to her. She said "My father was an art dealer in The Netherlands. I was ten years old when he sent me to England in 1940, during the Phony War, before the Nazi invasion and the Fall of France. I was then sent to America. My parents... did not survive the war."

"I'm sorry." I said, as a small crowd formed around us to hear Ruth's story.

"Thank you." she said. "Almost 20 years after the war, several of the artworks stolen from my father's gallery were found and sent to me. One of them was the Greuze, but I had no idea for many years how valuable it really was. Just recently, a friend noticed it and told me I should have it appraised, and that's when it was discovered."

"Were any of the others valuable?" I asked.

"No, certainly not like the Greuze." Mrs. Baker said. "And strangely enough, the one of least value was the one of the most sentimental value to me. It hung on the wall in my room when I was a child in Holland. It was a rather crude painting of three clowns in a circus. My father handed it to me at the train station, and told me to keep it, to remember him and my mother by. My mother hugged me and I got on the train... and that was the last time I ever saw them."

"I appreciate you sharing your story with me." I said respectfully, feeling the melancholy emotions inside the old woman. "If you'll excuse me, ma'am, I must attend to my wife, who is hosting this event on the University's behalf." I handed her my card and said "I would love to talk with you some more, when you have some time."

"Oh, I would love that." said the old woman. "And it has been wonderful meeting you, the great Iron Crowbar..."

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Among the guests that went through security and came into the Museum were Edward and Stephanie Steele. With them were future Artist extraordinaire Marie Steele and future Detective extraordinaire Carole Troy.

"Marie has been very excited for weeks about this." Stephanie told me. "She loves drawing and painting, and Carole keeps saying Marie is going to become a great artist."

"She already is a great artist, if you ask me." I said, and I wasn't just being polite; Marie was already becoming the Stuff of Legend in these here parts.

A few minutes later, the man with the graying hair and beard was introduced to me as Dr. Nadler, who was the expert that would reconfirm the authenticity of the Greuze. As I shook hands with him, I said "I would imagine you get asked this a lot, but how do you authenticate a painting like that."

Dr. Nadler said "It's a lot like Police work, Commander. Just as you can determine things from patterns such as fingerprints or ballistics, and just as you can identify a criminal by his patterns of behavior, I see characteristics of paintings as well as the artists through the paints used, the distinctive brush strokes, as well as the canvas upon which the art is painted. For this reconfirmation, I'll spot-check certain characteristics of the painting."

"Are you from this area?" I asked.

"No," said Dr. Nadler, "I work for the Smithsonian in Washington, D.C. I was asked to come out and verify the Greuze, and was very happy to find it was authentic..."

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Nearly an hour later, the Curator tapped a spoon to his champagne glass. He was standing in front of the easel as he announced "Ladies and gentlemen, we will be bringing in the Lost Greuze in just a moment. You may look at it, but we ask that you do not reach out and touch it. The auction will begin at eleven o'clock sharp."

Dr. Nadler accompanied three Museum Security persons into the side room. As they were getting the painting, I looked around the room. I noted the woman carrying the tray of champagne glasses was now carrying an empty tray, and had stopped to watch from near the Gift Shop door.

I also noticed that the plainclothes Federal Agents were watching the door, and not watching other people. And it crossed my mind that this was the most clownish security operation I'd seen in some time.

A moment later, the security men brought out the Greuze, and the guests began applauding as they put it on the easel and took their stations next to it. I noticed that the guard on the left (the painting's right) had been gaining weight, so his uniform looked a bit 'stuffed', and it was straining at the buttons. His shave resembled a five o'clock shadow, at best. His shoes were poorly shined as well. Not the TCPD standard, fer sure.

The other guard was younger, in his early 20s, and he looked to be freshly clean shaven. His uniform fitted him perfectly, almost to military perfection. His shoes were also shined to military standards. As guests began crowding around, the slovenly guard didn't seem to be paying much attention to them, but the younger man was observing everything with a critical eye.

"Dr. Nadler, will you confirm the authenticity of the Lost Greuze?" the Curator said loudly. Dr. Nadler stepped inside the velvet ropes, and began examining the painting. He first used a magnifying glass in several places, and visually inspected it. Then he took out what looked like a laser rangefinder, but cast a purplish light on parts of it, and looked through the device's viewer at it."

After a moment he said, almost lovingly as he gazed at the painting, "Yes, I can confirm that it's the authentic painting." Everyone applauded again.