Shelly & Danny

Wow, I thought to myself. I was the prodigal son. I was the one to be taken back in, into my own home that I had paid for.

Tom being so against me moving back made me want to stay just to spite him. Plus, my staying here was obviously going to put a strain on their relationship.

If I walked out now, there would be no coming back and everything I've been planning for my future would go out the window. So, I decided to stay. I would decide later if I should chuck the plan and start over again.

"Ok, I understand. I'll move my stuff to the guestroom. I have the rest of my stuff in the car."

Shelly smiled at my capitulation. Tom gave me a dirty look. Well, you can't please everybody.

It's Not Me Honey, It's You

Tom had a strange work schedule. He would work three, four p.m. to midnight shifts, and two regular nine to five.

I was out the door usually by eight in the morning and going to coffee shops or the library to work on my business plan. And while I had no intention of working for anyone else ever again, I had applied for unemployment benefits, so I was sending out resumes to potential employers to please the unemployment office. That way they would keep sending me my monthly $1,200 check.

For the most part I was doing my best to be out of the house as much as possible when dickhead was around. On the Wednesday of the second week Tom was working the night shift, so I was home early. Shelly came into the kitchen and interrupted my dinner.

She gave me a forced smile, "Danny, honey, when you're done come to the living room. We need to talk."

Pretty sure that she was ready to end our strained new arrangement, I took my time finishing my sandwich, grabbed the beer I had been drinking and made my way into the living room.

"Ok, Shelly, what did you want to talk about?"

"There's actually a few things we need to talk about. First, I know this new arrangement is tough on you. But I want to say that you've been really really good under the circumstances. Believe it or not you're actually handling this much better than Tom. He's having a real hard time with it, but I'm working on him."

She got a big smile on her face.

"I know you must be really lonely and really horny, but believe me I'm working on Tom to allow me to give you a little relief now and again. I don't think he'll bend to where he'll be ok with you fucking me or blowjobs, but I think I can get him to come around to letting you eat my pussy. He doesn't like to do it and honestly, he's terrible at it when he does. But you're really good at that. Your dick may be too small to be any good for sex, honey, but I miss your tongue. And I miss you too honey. And if you're a good boy, once in a while I'll get you off with my hand."

Again, I couldn't help but wonder if this woman had always been this self-centered and insane and I had missed it, or was it a more recent development.

"My dick isn't too small, honey. Your cunt's too big. You have a cave for a cunt, Shelly."

Shelly gave me an incredulous look, "What did you say?"

"I said you have a cave for a cunt, honey. That's why you need an oversized dick to fuck you. Because you have a cave for a cunt. My dick fit just fine with every other woman I've fucked before you and it will fit just fine with all the women I'm going to fuck from this point forward. You don't need to bother working on Tom. I want a nice tight pussy to fuck. I don't want your loose, ginormous, cave of a cunt to fuck anymore."

"Fuck you, Danny. I don't have a huge pussy. You have a tiny dick. You're the problem, not me. Don't you dare try to turn this shit on me, little man. You're just jealous because you don't get to fuck me anymore, and you're being mean. You can forget about getting any hand jobs from me anytime soon."

"You can take your hand and shove it up your ass, Shelly."

"Fuck you, Danny! Every time I try to be nice to you, you do something to piss me off." With that Shelly got up from the couch and started storming out of the room, but then turned back.

"And you better start having your paychecks deposited into the joint account little man. You missed the end of last month, but I'm willing to let that one go, but the next one better be there at the end of this month."

"Oh, I forgot to tell you, Shelly. I got fired. You see I was depressed, drinking everyday and kept on missing work and calling in sick, and I got fired."

"Mr. Thompson fired you after ten years working there?... Just go back and apologize and tell him it won't happen again and get your job back."

"No can do, Shelly. I was really angry, you know because of how my dear wife was treating me, and I called his kids ugly and called his wife a whore. There isn't a chance in hell he'll take me back."

"What are you going to do? You have to find a job. You can't just live here without paying your way, Danny. We're not going to just support you, you know."

"Why not? I supported you for twelve years when you didn't contribute a dime to the house. Why can't you support me until I get another job? You're working full time, and Tommy is working, why can't you guys pay the bills until I get a job? I'm sending out a bunch of resumes every day and I'm sure I'll be able to get something soon. You just need to be patient for a bit, that's all."

Shelly was a spender. So, for almost our entire marriage, I moved some money into investments every month. I had kept this from her, so that we'll have some fall back money, and to save for our future. There was a little over $100,000 invested in stock mutual funds. They've done really well in the post Great Recession years. Shelly had no clue about that money. Which was a good thing, because that, and the home equity loan I had gotten, was going to pay for starting up my new firm.

"You need to get a job soon, Danny. Look, I love you and I can be understanding, for a little while, ok? But Tom isn't going to like this one bit. He's going to want to throw your ass out. So, you need to get a job very soon. You get that, Danny?

"I'll keep it from him for now, but I won't be able to do that for too long. I don't feel good about lying to him like that. I can put in overtime at work, so I'll do that. But you can't just be a bum and hang around the house all day long. You need to get a job ASAP."

This woman has no self-awareness. Doesn't she realize that she just admitted that she's been a bum all these years working a part-time job, and not contributing a penny towards any of the household bills.

"Shelly, every day I send out a dozen resumes, and you see me leave every morning all dressed up, because I go pounding on doors (I was actually doing it to buy me some time before she realized I wasn't working, but oh well). I'll get something soon. You guys just need to be a bit patient with me, ok?"

"Ok, ok. Just get it done. You made such a clusterfuck out of everything, Danny. I hope you can see that. If you hadn't got your panties in a bunch, you'd still be in the master bedroom, and you'd be getting some pussy now and again. Instead Tom is in there, and you're all alone using your hand to get yourself off. And you got yourself fired from a good job. I kept telling you to not let this shit hurt us, but you had to go ahead and fuck everything up, didn't you? You couldn't be strong like me and handle things. You've always been weak, Danny. That's been your problem. You're too weak."

"You're not strong, Shelly. You're just stubborn and selfish. There is a big difference."

"What did you say?"

"You always say that you're a strong woman. You're not strong, Shelly. You're just selfish and stubborn. That doesn't make you a strong person. You quit at everything that's a little hard. You couldn't even finish one semester in community college. Then you had all these careers you wanted to try. You remember, fashion designer, paralegal? The longest you made it going after 'your dream job' was three weeks.

"You're a quitter, Shelly. You've just always had your daddy, and then me to bail you out. But you've deluded yourself into thinking that you're this strong woman doing it all on your own. Hear you roar. You're a quitter, Shelly. You're one of the weakest people I know. And that's what you did on our marriage. You quit on it. Instead of trying to work with me with what you thought was missing, you took the easy road and went looking for it elsewhere."

Shelly stomped to her bedroom and slammed the door. She obviously wasn't liking the direction our conversation was taking. And once again she took the easy way out and ran away.

My New Normal

After this confrontation with Shelly, there was a sort of a détente between us. She no longer tried to offer me mercy hand jobs, and I did my best (but didn't always succeed) to hide my contempt for her. For the most part we treated each other as roommates.

Every once in a while, when she would look my way, I would hold up my right thumb and index finger in a semicircle, opposite the same with my left hand. So that it would look like two opposing parenthesis that didn't quite touch ( ). It was my way of calling her pussy a cave.

Most of the time she would huff and give me the finger. Once in a while she would hold her own right thumb and index fingers about a couple of inches apart and sneer at me. I would smile, shake my head, look down at my hands making the cave sign and shrug. Childish I know, but one must take their little pleasures wherever they can.

My goal was to trample on both of my enemies' self-esteem, like they've tried to do to mine. This was the best I could come up with until I found a better form of revenge. With Shelly it was attacking her vanity, and her self-image. She had deluded herself into thinking that she was a strong, accomplished woman, who was physically perfect and highly desirable. So, I tried to remind her as often as I could that she had grown up with a daddy who had a good income, and then a husband. She hadn't accomplished anything in her life herself. And physically she was less than perfect.

With Tom I had to fight an asymmetric war. No matter how much I worked out I was never going to grow six inches, or get broad and strong like him. The same with my cock size or according to Shelly sexual prowess. But I knew guys like Tom. His weakness was lack of intellect and education.

No one took him seriously. From watching them interact at home, neither did Shelly. She would come to me for advice about work problems. When he would try to interject with his thoughts, she would look at him dismissively and then continue to discuss things with me.

One evening into our new normal all three of us were having dinner together. Once again, Shelly was directing most of her conversation towards me, which I could see was irritating Tom. At one point she asked me if I had any new job prospects.

"Yesterday I had my second interview with this firm downtown. He pretty much let me know the job was mine if I wanted it. I asked him what the pay was, and he told me 120,000. I must have looked unimpressed, because he told me that would be the base, and that there would be bonuses on top of that. I told him thank you, but that I'll let him know.

"I was making 150 a year. I'm not going to go back to 120. And honestly, I think I was underpaid at 150. I'm going to need at least a 150 base, with a strong bonus structure, to even consider it."

The whole time I said this I was looking at Shelly; however, my real focus was on Tom in my peripheral vision. He was fuming. He must make at best 30 or 35 thousand a year. I'm sure it pissed him off that I was so casually dismissing $120,000 base pay. But that was my whole point. I wasn't going on job interviews, so I didn't have the opportunity to decline any offers. I just wanted to piss him off.

But fortune often comes from unlikely corners. In this case it came from Shelly.

"Honey, are you sure you don't want to even consider 120,000. That's a good base pay, and like they said there will be bonuses. Plus, they'll see you're worth a lot more than 120,000 pretty fast and give you a raise. Tom and I together barely make more than half of that base pay, honey.

"Danny, I haven't bought any new dresses or shoes in months, and I haven't gone to a decent restaurant in months. You need to get a nice job and start taking me out again baby."

Tom looked like he was ready to blow a gasket. Inside I was high fiving myself, but outside I was acting nonchalant and pensive.

"Why aren't you buying new shoes and dresses, Shelly? And why isn't Tom taking you out to nice places?"

Shelly had a bellyful laugh at this, "Danny, I don't want to go to McDonald's. I want to go to nice places like we used to go."

Tom pushed back on his chair and sprang up with the chair falling backwards to the ground. Shelly finally realized her thoughtlessness, and took Tom's right hand with her left.

"Tom, baby, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it in the way it came out."

When I laughed out loud, they both looked at me, and I smirked back at them. Point to cuckold.

Tom pulled his right hand away from her left and jerked forward to come at me, but Shelly grabbed his left hand this time, with her right, and started to pull Tom towards the living room.

"Tom, baby, let's go upstairs and fuck. Danny is just jealous because he doesn't get to fuck me anymore. He's just trying to make trouble, baby. Let's go upstairs and fuck me like Danny never could."

As they walked away, she looked over her shoulder back at me with a contemptuous smirk on her face. I just shrugged my shoulders and gave her my ( ) sign. That made her snap her head back around.

I shouted after them, "Oh guys, I'm truly sorry. Didn't mean anything by it. Look, to make it up to you guys, I'm pretty sure I saw a McDonald's coupon somewhere. I'll find it for you, ok?" And gave a big laugh.

Tom made to pull away from Shelly, but this time she grabbed his upper arm with both of her hands.

"Let's go, baby. Ignore him. It's his little dick talking out of jealousy. Let's go upstairs so you can stick that big dick in me." And with that she pulled him away.

My mother was one of the wisest people I knew, and respected the most. She didn't have an opportunity to get an education, getting pregnant with me her junior year in high school. Growing up she had worked low level jobs in an office during the day, and waitressed several evenings during the week to support the two of us.

I never held Shelly's lack of education, nor her job against her. I never even thought anything of it. If I had met Tom under different circumstances, I wouldn't have thought anything of the job he had. I would have just judged him on his character. But this was war. I had to exploit any vulnerability that I felt they had.

That night as I lay in my bedroom, I could hear them fucking each other's brains out. Whenever they wanted to rub it in, they left their bedroom door open and were especially loud. I was supposed to have been the one that scored points that night. Then why was I the one alone crying, while they were together fucking? I didn't know who my revenge plan was hurting more.

Let's Share Our Fantasies Honey

A few weeks later Shelly surprised me once again. Tom was at work, and Shelly and I were having dinner together. As I was getting up to take my dish to the sink Shelly asked, "Honey, can we talk? I have an idea, that I think you will like."

I cautiously responded, "Ok!"

"Honey, I think we've been approaching this all wrong. It's mostly my fault. I should've communicated better to you."

First thought I had was that she must have come across some pop culture psych article or TV show. The second thought was that it's incredible that she thought the problems we were having were because she wasn't communicating enough TO me. Not that she was using her cave to communicate with her big dicked lover.

But I nodded for her to continue. I thought this should be good.

"Honey, I started with telling you that this has nothing to do with us. That it was separate from us. I think that was totally the wrong approach. What I should have done is include you in it. Make you a part of it."

When I raised my eyebrow, giving her an incredulous look, she continued, "Just hear me out honey. I think you're going to like where I'm going with this. Let me get it all out before you say anything, and be open and non-judgmental.... Pleassse!?"

I nodded for her to continue.

"Ok, I can see how in the beginning you felt that I was going to give most of my time and pussy to Tom. I mean it turned out that way, because you made it happen that way, but from the beginning I should've gone about this a different way. You just surprised me that day you caught us, honey. Whenever I'm with him all these crazy thoughts must be going through your head about how much he pleases me and that you can't. And that must make you feel inferior somehow."

I wondered what made her think that I was going to like this conversation.

"I was talking to Tom about all of this and we came up with a great idea, baby. I think you're going to love it." Shelly said the last with a big proud smile on her face, like she finally figured out the meaning of life.

"So, honey we thought it would be great if sometimes you join us. Not all the time or anything like that. Most of the time we would want to do it alone, but every once in a while.

"Even before you caught us, I've had this fantasy, and lately it's almost all I think about. You know how Tom is a big guy..."

When the look on my face must have changed, she added, "No, honey, I wasn't going to bring up again how much bigger he is down there than you. I mean just overall. He's tall and big and built really solid. That's another one of the differences I like so much about him. It's not your fault you weren't built like that, but it's something I need baby. To feel small next to my man. Anyway, you promised not to be judgmental and hear me out with an open mind and then you can have your say, ok?"

I didn't remember promising her any such thing, but since this conversation was mostly her, maybe the me in her head had promised her that.

And with a dreamy look in her eyes she continued, "So, anyway, sometimes he likes to fuck me while he's standing. He picks me up, puts his dick in me, I wrap my legs around him and he pulls and pushes me up and down on his cock. It's one of my favorite positions with him. You and me never tried that position for obvious reasons. It really makes me feel his power, and on top of that his dick really goes all the way in. It's really delicious.

"Anyway, the fantasy I keep having is that when he picks me up to fuck me like that, you're in the corner of the room watching us, and I crook my finger to you. You get on your hands and knees and crawl over to us. You stay on your knees right behind me, under my ass and you lick my asshole. If you want you can jerk off the whole time you're licking me. Tom said he doesn't have a problem with you jerking off while licking my ass. Just don't cum while you're doing it. And then Tom and me cum together at the same time.

"And after Tom cums in me I stand up and spread my legs wide and you get your head between my legs and I let Tom's cum dribble down to your mouth. And then you suck Tom's dick off of our juices. We both thought that would be so hot baby.

"Wouldn't that be incredibly hot honey? It will be like all of us sharing the same experience. Each of us playing our parts."

When Shelly was describing this scenario to me, from the look on her face, I swear she was ready to have an orgasm right there and then. Maybe she did have one. From all the times she said she faked it with me, maybe that's what her real orgasm looked like.