All Comments on 'She's Just Not Susceptible'

fucks sake this could have been a much longer story

to fast and cheep

Need more....just like this comment.

The setup is good, but things progress way too fast. She's claiming to be a skeptic who doesn't believe in hypnotism, but she's feeling these surges of pleasure and having trouble looking away from his eyes before she even has the words out. This is still quite good, but it feels like you began the story on third base - the best part of stories like this is the buildup but it was already mostly there right from the beginning.

It's a somewhat basic premise, but your writing and stylistic choices make it better. My only complaint is we never get the moment of "Turn off any recording devices"