Shivering Sarah

She slammed the door behind her and in spite of the tears in her eyes, she held her head up high, got into her car and sped away. Once she was at home the flood gates opened and she wept bitterly. She had no appetite at dinner time and had a few crackers and not a few glasses of wine.

"What's wrong with me?" she cried. "Why do I get assholes for boyfriends? Why can't I have a normal guy? Maybe they're like pumpkins in late October. All the good ones are gone and the rest are all rotten."

Eventually she fell asleep on the couch and in the morning had a wicked hangover. After calling in sick she drank lots of water, pounded down some ibuprofen and just rested for the rest of the day. Over and over she contemplated tracking down Jim's wife but realized it would do nothing to help Sarah and could potentially cause some indirect harm to an innocent four-year old.

As the next day was Friday, she called in sick once more. She went for a quick trip to visit her folks. They were surprised when she showed up that evening and when her mother gave her a big hug, Sarah broke down. For the rest of the evening she recounted the Story of Jim, as she called it, leaving out any sexual details. Her parents were very loving and supportive and by the time she left Sunday morning she felt much better.

*****

For the first few days back at work she pretty much hid out in her office and relied on emails and phone calls to conduct her business. Eventually, on Wednesday, Lisa dropped by the office and asked Sarah how she was. Sarah gave a thirty second summary of what happened and was reassuring that she was doing as well as could be expected. It wasn't until after Thanksgiving that she ran into J.J.

"Oh, hi, Sarah. Haven't seen you in ages. I hope you got over whatever that bug was you had when I almost ran over you and Lisa."

"Oh, I got rid of that bug, you can be damn sure of that. And I hope I broke his ribs in the process!"

"What? You weren't sick? What happened?"

"It seems Yours Truly has a problem with men and on that day, I found out I was being lied to by a married man. So, I let him have it. I may have 'accidentally' kicked him in the ribs on my way out," she giggled.

"You didn't!"

"Oh, I assure you it was purely an accident," she laughed. "Since I told him never to come to this hospital again, I can only assume he went across town to your girlfriend's ER. I just wonder what his wife thought when he got home."

"Oh, Sarah, I'm so sorry to hear about your trouble. Are you doing better now?"

"Yeah, sometimes a good dose of anger goes a long way to helping me heal. I'm doing a lot better than I was back in February. Then I just didn't know why and I was left hanging. Not this time! I am so done with him.

"How are you doing?" she went on. "Everything OK with you?"

"Yeah, pretty much. Uh, you mentioned my 'girlfriend's ER.' Seems like it not that way anymore. Karen and I split weeks ago."

"Oh, J.J., I'm sorry to hear that. I really like her."

"I do too, but we both agreed that we really had no long-term future together. Nothing earth shaking, no anger and certainly no kicked ribs," he laughed. "We just agreed to call things off. If I ran into her at the store, I'm sure we'd chat like old friends."

"I wish I could say the same about my two most recent exes," Sarah sighed. "Look, I've gotta run to a meeting with Dr. Morrison, so I'll see you around, OK J.J.?"

"Yeah, sure. Oh, and Sarah, feel free to drop by any time."

"Will do, bye."

*****

It was at the official hospital Christmas party that J.J. and Sarah met again, this time in a far more relaxed atmosphere. J.J. was making the rounds and trying to be a responsive administrator, talking to individuals and listening to their suggestions and complaints. Sarah was hanging out with some of her work buddies and having a good time, no doubt encouraged by a second glass of wine on her empty stomach. When Lisa saw J.J. across the room she whispered to Sarah, "There he is, God, is he handsome, or what."

"Who?"

"J.J.! Oooh, if I weren't married, I'd be chasing after that. I understand he broke up with his girlfriend recently."

"You know you couldn't go after him. Policy says no dating coworkers."

"I know, but I can still fantasize, can't I? Why don't you go after him? I've seen you two having lunch together all the time."

"Same rule applies. Anyway, he's a good friend, that's all."

Just then J.J. came over to them. He chatted with them about the party, the weather and the upcoming holidays. Once the idle chit-chat was done, he asked them if they had any suggestions for him and the C-suite. Sarah make a tiny suggestion about the interoffice mail but was then horrified to hear Lisa pipe up.

"What's with the rule about dating coworkers here at the hospital? I mean, there are over a thousand employees here and we spend most of our days here, so it's natural for people to want to get together.

"Well," replied J.J., "From what I understand the main rule is you can't date someone in your chain of command. It would not be appropriate for a boss to date an underling. If a boss asked out someone and they refused, well, it could get uncomfortable. And then if they did go out and things fell apart, work would suffer."

"What about between departments?"

"Uh, I understand that's OK. So, a nurse could date a lab tech, for example."

"I see. Glad I'm married. Sorry J.J., you can't ask me out," joked Lisa.

"Nope, I can't and wouldn't. I'm in charge of your department."

"So, Sarah, how are you doing?" he went on. "Got any plans for the holidays?"

"Yeah, I'll be visiting my parents for a couple of days, nothing special."

"Well, have a good time," he said as he turned to leave.

"Uh, J.J.," said Sarah, "Could I have a private word with you?"

"Sure, excuse us, Lisa. Sarah, let's go out to the hallway." Once they were there and the noise was less, he turned to her and asked, "What's up?"

"This is embarrassing, but I promised myself I would do this. For Christmas I want you to know something: I really, really appreciate everything you've done for me this year. I've had some ups and downs, but you literally saved my life and career and I can't thank you enough."

"Sarah, it was my pleasure. I'm glad you're doing so well, particularly after that last fiasco. You really didn't need to ask me out here just to tell me that, did you?"

"No, but I did because I wanted to do this." She then reached up and gave him a sweet peck on his cheek and a tiny little hug. "Thank you J.J., from the bottom of my heart. And Merry Christmas." She turned from him and went back into the main room, leaving him stunned and speechless.

For the rest of the evening she became aware of him seemingly watching her every move. She danced a few times with several coworkers and when she looked over one's shoulders, J.J. was staring at her, even when he was dancing with other women. Finally, just before midnight the band announced they would be doing three more tunes and suddenly J.J. was there asking her to dance.

"Oh, I don't know if I should dance with the one who controls the departmental money," she teased as she accepted his hand and was led to the dance floor. The first tune was fairly fast and he danced like a pro, leading her through intricate steps seamlessly. "Wow, you've taken lessons."

"Yes, when I was a kid. My mom insisted that all gentlemen should know how to do four things."

"Uh, huh. And what are those?"

"Type, drive a stick shift and dance."

"That's only three. What's the fourth?"

"Uh, let's say my mother was very progressive and she gave me many books on, uh, how do I say it? Uh, on how to please a woman."

"Oh, etiquette books?"

"Ahh, no, more personal than that."

"You're kidding! She wanted you to know how to do 'it'? That's wild. Well, can you type? Drive a stick shift?" she went on.

"Um hmm."

"And I know you can dance. What about...?"

"Sarah, you're embarrassing me. How can I answer that?"

"I'll take that as a 'yes' and leave it at that."

Just then the band swung into their final tune, a slow, sensual waltz. J.J. continued to lead as Sarah pulled herself closer to him. She could feel him try to distance himself a bit from her but she wouldn't let go. And then she felt it! J.J. was getting hard.

"Oh, it would be so nice," she thought to herself, "But I know he won't violate the rules. That's just the way he is."

Once the dance was over, he pulled himself back and turned to leave the dance floor while offering her his elbow. She placed her hand there and let him lead her to her table.

"Thank you for the wonderful dance, kind sir," she teased him.

"You're welcome. May I request a slot on your dance card for next year?" he laughed back.

"Absolutely, I'll look forward to it."

J.J. then turned away and excused himself from the group and faded into the crowd. Lisa leaned over to Sarah and whispered, "You two sure looked good out there. And he was holding you pretty close, huh?"

"No, he wasn't. I was holding him," she giggled. "And it felt really good to be in his arms."

"Too bad he's off the market, for you, that is."

"Yeah, I know." She replied and to herself she thought "It's no damn fair."

*****

The little posters around the hospital invited all employees to the "OR Soiree and New Years Eve Party." It seems that all the surgeons would pool their resources and throw a big bash to celebrate the holiday. It was held at a local country club and from what she had heard, Sarah understood it to be a party not to miss. They even encouraged people to not drive to the party and they would provide free Ubers for anyone needing a ride home. Even though she had enjoyed the official hospital Christmas party, she decided that another, perhaps looser, party was what she needed after her debacle with Jim. She wanted to cut loose and enjoy herself.

Lisa, her husband Mike and Sarah shared a taxi there and hung around together for much of the party. The party was fairly tame initially, but as the evening wore on and the alcohol consumption went up, the noise and laughter rose considerably. Sarah limited her drinking to just a couple of glasses of wine and then switched to seltzer water. She moved from group to group, laughing, joking and generally having fun.

Around ten pm she looked up to see J.J. coming through the door. She was surprised to see an administrator at this particular party but she went over and greeted him warmly.

"So, J.J., decided to come slum with the worker bees, huh?"

"Hi, Sarah, I wouldn't miss this for the world. It is always a fun party and I'm not much removed from being a worker bee myself. Back home my dad is a radiology tech and Mom works at a nursery."

"They must have been proud to see you go to the university, huh?"

"Absolutely, but to tell the truth, if I hadn't gone, they would have killed me!" he laughed. "They insisted that an education was a must."

"You seem to have done well. I hear you even are known to rescue damsels, so your parents must be quite proud."

"Rescuing damsels was not taught in college, at least in any of the classes I took," he mused.

"No? Well, I happen to know that one damsel is glad you knew how. I understand she is still grateful."

"Sarah, please. You've thanked me enough. I was just doing what was right."

"I know, J.J.," she replied putting her hand on his arm. "I know. But maybe I've had two drinks and I'm in a good mood and looking back on the year, well, meeting you was the highlight. Care to dance?"

"Yes, I would. We may be the only ones, but once I've had a drink, I'll come get you and we can cut a rug, OK?"

Sarah went back to visit with Lisa while J.J. made the rounds and had a drink. A bit later he came by and requested a dance. They danced off to the side of the crowd and pretty soon several other couples joined them. Dancing to the fast tunes was fun but with the two slow tunes she felt wonderful. His arms were strong, he guided her with ease and his pelvis lightly brushed hers with a promising firmness in his pants.

"I think he likes me," she thought to herself. "Wouldn't that be great if he asked me out? Or maybe I need to ask him!"

"Penny for your thoughts," he whispered in her ear.

"Oh, I'm just enjoying dancing with you. Nothing much else..."

"I'm enjoying being with you," he said.

What? "He said 'being', not dancing'," she thought. "Maybe he likes me, too!"

After the music ended, he gently broke from her, looked at her with a wry smile and then excused himself. "What was that?" she asked herself. "Does he like me or not?" On shaky legs she went back to her seat and sat next to Lisa and Mike.

"You look like you're not feeling well," said Lisa. "Did J.J. say something to you?"

"No, not much."

"You know, Sarah, I think you two have something for each other. The way he looked at you, the way you two dance together... Wow, you could have started a fire with the heat you two were sending off."

"Lisa, I like him, but it will never be a thing. He is an honest guy and won't break the rules. So, I'm going to start the new year right and start looking for someone new. I've got to get away from this hospital and look for men elsewhere."

"Gonna do a dating app?"

"Yeah, I think I just might."

"Hey, look, it's getting close to midnight. We should all get ready for the countdown," said Mike. "Another drink?"

After Lisa declined, Sarah agreed to one more glass of wine to toast in the new year. With the glass in her hand she wandered over to the crowd in the main ballroom and suddenly saw J.J. across the room, staring at her. As if by magic they started to move around the crowd towards each other. After reaching him she stood on tip toes as he whispered in her ear. "There's going to be a lot of craziness here pretty soon."

"Then let's go into the kitchen, should be quieter there, don't you think?"

"Um hmm, let's."

The kitchen was unoccupied and much quieter. She led him over to a large butcher-block table and turned towards him. "Can you give a girl a lift?" He reached down, grabbed he by the waist and lifted her onto the table. She spread her legs, pulled him towards her and gave him a small hug.

Just then the countdown began. The crowd chanted the passing of each second and at midnight horns and noise makers went off, people shouted 'Happy New Year' and the music started up again.

Sarah looked into J.J.'s eyes and gently pulled him to her and turned her head for a kiss. For a split second she saw hesitation in his eyes, then he closed them and leaned down to accept the kiss. It was the sweetest, tenderest and most loving kiss she had ever had. It sent thrills through her entire body and elated her as never before. There was no deep thrusting of the tongue, just a gentle joining of soft lips together. Her arms went around his neck as she pulled him tightly to her. He reciprocated by pulling her torso and low back towards him, bringing her pussy right onto his lower belly.

After what seemed like eons, but at the same time what seemed like way too little time, he gently broke the kiss. He then nuzzled her neck and ear, placing tiny kisses as he went.

"He likes me, he likes me!" her heart sang. "He's really into me!" With that she turned her head back to him and silently demanded another kiss, which he gave her. This one had so much more promise and she suddenly felt herself moisten. Then she felt his hands sliding along her sides, her back and then her butt. He was stroking, caressing, feeling.

Sarah pulled back a bit to look at him in the eyes. She saw pure desire, much as she felt for him. "Come with me," she whispered as she took his hand, hopped off the table and led him out the back door of the kitchen. Quickly pulling him down the hall, she found an unlocked door to what appeared to be a large linen closet. Once inside the door was pulled shut and she turned to him again. "Now, where were we?" she giggled.

"I was about to touch you in so many inappropriate ways," he murmured into her ear.

"Then you better get busy," she responded. She was thrilled to feel his lips once again, savoring their taste, their softness, their urgency. She wanted to eat him alive, wanted to be eaten alive, wanted to be consumed by him. His hands stroked her back until she realized she wanted so much more. Gently she took one of his hands and guided it to her breast. "Mmm," she hummed, as he took the bait.

"Mmm hmm is right."

"Oh, J.J., I want you so much," she sighed as he stroked her.

"I you, too."

"Then let's get out of here." With that, she straightened up, looked him in the eye and told him she'd be right back. She literally ran down the hall to the ball room, went to Lisa, grabbed her coat and turned to leave.

"Are you leaving already?" asked Lisa.

"Yeah, kinda tired. Happy New Year, everybody."

"Sarah, you sure don't look tired, you're looking rather frisky."

"Nope, just tired. I'll Uber it home. Thanks."

It was the hardest thing she had ever done, trying not to run out of the room. She forced herself to slowly walk away, appearing weary as she went. Once out of the room she sprinted to the front door. J.J. was standing alone at the taxi stand and just as she arrived, the first Uber pulled up. They sat quietly in the back, holding hands with him softly rubbing his thumb on top of her wrist. It was so touching, so sweet, that she felt she was going to melt right then.

The ride home was over in just a few minutes, though it felt like it would never end. Once at his place he led her to the door and turned to her. "Sarah, if you come in here you need to understand that I intend to not be a gentleman, like I was the last time you were here."

"Good, 'cause I don't want you to be."

Once the door was closed behind him, she pushed him away with a pointed finger and said, "Don't touch, just watch."

The hair, which had been pinned up in a French twist, was first. She pulled out the pins and let her hair cascade over her shoulders, then she shook her head a bit to loosen the hair. His hooded eyes watched with interest.

Her off-the-shoulder dress was slinky and form fitting with a zipper that was hidden along the side. She reached over and slowly pulled it down to her hip. Once she released the zipper, the dress simply slid silently to the floor, pooling at her feet. Her tiny strapless bra and panties were all that remained.

She saw J.J.'s eyes dilate with excitement. When she glanced down, she could see the beginning of a bulge in his trousers. He started to reach for her and she held her hand out and whispered, "Stop right there or I'll leave."

"No, you won't, you want this as much as I do," he laughed quietly.

"Maybe. No, you're right, but still, stay there." Then she slowly turned around and suddenly realized she was standing in front of a full-length mirror. She could see one sexy woman, clad only in underwear, and over her shoulder she could see him staring at her with undisguised lust in his eyes. She liked what she saw. Her breasts were decent, she thought, she liked their shape and without a bra they stood proud and firm. With that running through her mind she reached up and undid the tiny front-hasp and slowly let it bra trickle through her fingers to the floor. J.J.'s eyes widened further as she reached up and rubbed her breasts gently and then gave her nipples a tiny pinch.

She then gave him a smile in the mirror and reached down, letting her thumbs slide into the tiny strings that were the side of her panties. Slowly, oh so slowly, she slid the panties down across her ass. She liked how her ass looked. It was full, but not too big, and firm. Once the panties got down to mid-thigh, she released them and they fell to the floor. In the mirror J.J.'s eyes were glued to her ass, so she bent forward just a bit to tease him with a tiny glimpse of her moist pussy. "That ought to seal the deal," she thought to herself. And then she turned to face him.