All Comments on 'Show, Not Tell'

Sweet story!

5

You are appreciated!

Alan

Please do not try to suck the venom out of a snakebite or it will be a joint funeral...

Regardless of your medical problems, your stories are wonderful. I think i have read most, if not all of them. Please keep on as long as you can.

Thanks for sharing your imagination and skill as a writer!

Sorry about your loss of vision and cancer. That being said, the story wasn't very interesting and certainly not erotic. I wish you well.

Having nearly 500 stories and less than 1500 followers doesn't speak very well for you. And sadly neither does this story. I hope when your time comes you go peacefully in your sleep. Best of luck.

Thank you for sharing your stories. Don’t worry about the typos. I hope you are doing okay

Yes, very breif and i get the point about actions more than words - but…

Only nine months in and she expects a proposal? Doesnt get it so she dumps him. Now after the snake bite she changes her mind. That is not someone to marry now.

I also dont think he is ready after the prior hurt.

You did well just writing, let alone this.

Thank you.

I hope you have faith that will carry you in an uncertain future.

1) Snakes are venomous, not poisonous.

2) While some snakes can bite without injecting their venom, all snakes with fangs (aka 2 distinct puncture wounds) are venomous.

3) If a woman is demanding a marriage proposal after 9 months, RUN!

Well done, sir, well done.

Your stories are always entertaining, and this was no exception. Thank you for continuing to write in what must be very difficult circumstances.

Five stars.

Both of these fictional characters are dealing with turbulent emotions. Angela no doubt feels that James is in love with her but does not understand why he can't just say so. She feels this so strongly that she is expecting a proposal. James on the other hand is not only dealing with uncertainty as to a course of action in regard to Angela, but also with mistrust stemming from a past relationship. Neither of these characters are right or wrong, their emotions just are what they are. Rationality is irrelevant how they feel. Shielding oneself from further hurt is what both of these characters are about. The snakebite is merely a plot device to set in motion a train of events that lead to a satisfactory resolution of a situation where the character's innermost desires would have been frustrated by a lack of open communication.

The dilemma here is whether to love and lose or to stay silent and wonder forever what might have been.

Angela should certainly have stood her ground and requested a straight answer, and James should have certainly given her a immediate response, even if it was no more than a "wait a second" to give himself a chance to frame a proper reply.

Maybe a takeaway for the reader is to not wait for a lucky accident to resolve an uncomfortable situation with someone that is deeply cared for.

Thank you Oggbashan for sharing this short tale with us! All the best to you! 5 stars.

I'd rather a story of yours with typos, than an ice cream cone in August. Though that's good too. Thanks so much. May the Great Physician be your help.

Sucking the venom out is a myth. You aren't doing anything but wasting time.

Cutting the wound open is only doing more damage. The venom has already moved well beyond that wound.

In case of a snake bite that you aren't sure of, or know it's venomous: If you have ready access to a pressure bandage put it on, otherwise go straight to the hospital. If you can describe the snake do so, but if you can't then don't worry about it.

Hope you are doing well, I really enjoy your writings.

What was written in the first card?

very cool little story.thank you

Thanks for another nice story. Hope you keep well and can continue sharing your writing. Best wishes for the new year.

sweet

How cool is that? A serpent, instead of leading two people into Paradise Lost, leads them into Paradise Found, and in only about a thousand words. Praise the Lord for biting reptiles! 5/5 stars!

Very, very bad advice on how to treat a snake bite.

Great story BUT short! I guess I'll have to read more of your works to get more.

My advice on how to treat snake bites was correct 60 years ago - the last time I was in an area infested with venomous snakes. but not recommended now.

I'm not sure if I should give this 5 stars, because first of all, good story, and she eventually realized he loved her. Or 1 stars, because I hate women like that (who need to be told and ignore the actions), and the author didn't entirely convince me that Angela actually learned the right lesson (not that he loves her, but that she had a wrong mindset and should FOREVER pay attention to his actions not his words). Because if she didn't, as it likely is the case, she'll just cheat on him with the first guy who know all the correct things to say to a woman,

Five short stars. Thank you.

The reason that James found it hard to say those words really resonates. A very sweet short story and a great lesson, thank you ❤️ 5*

Contrived and artless