Silver and Gold Ch. 04

Silver was quiet for a few moments, digesting all he had just learned. He looked Feldspar over. Faeries' strength was proportional to the size of sacrifice that created them. To have been inadvertently made due to the sheer volume of lives taken in battle meant Feldspar had to be nearly as powerful at the Lord himself. He doubted anyone in the Wood knew or remembered that about him. No, most faeries saw him as either the Lord's weapon or the Lord's play thing. Feldspar was so much more than that.

"You know what I say?" he said at last.

Feldspar shook his head.

"If he doesn't want you, fuck 'im. He's not the one for you. If he didn't know from the very second he made you that you were a miracle, then he didn't deserve you." Feldspar's eyes widened at Silver's casual disrespect for the Lord and let out a choked laugh. He glanced at the dais where Mal and Daniella were still wrapped around each other. He wasn't ready to say those words out loud, but there was something freeing about even just thinking them. He turned the thought over in his head. It felt really good to admit that Mal wasn't the one for him, and that was Mal's loss, not his.

"Thanks," he said, still smiling. Slowly, barely daring to breathe, Feldspar tipped his head down to rest against Silver's shoulder as they both leaned back in the divan. Thrills of pleasure radiated from the tiny points of contact between them.

"I promise I'm not usually this morose," Feldspar said. "As I said, it has been a hellish few months." Silver's heart squeezed at his apologetic tone. Ignoring the voice of self-preservation screaming in his head, he shifted so he could wrap an arm around Feldspar's shoulder. Feldspar sighed and settled more fully against him. It felt so good to comfort Feldspar, his heart felt like it would beat out of his chest.

"I get it," he said. He understood all too well what it felt like to want someone who didn't even know he existed. At least, hadn't known he existed until very recently.

"Spending time with you is so much better than all this," Feldspar mumbled as he waved a hand at the rollicking party.

Silver chuckled a little at that and squeezed Feldspar's shoulder. "You don't have to come here and torture yourself every night, dude."

Feldspar jerked up, his face suddenly animated. "You are absolutely right. Let's go make something."

"Make something?"

"I know it's late but surely you must some simple snack you can teach me to make." Feldspar's smile didn't falter. Silver found it infectious and before he knew it he was smiling right back.

"Nah, dude. I don't wanna make anything. I'm too tired. But you can def come over and demolish the cheesecake I made earlier."

Feldspar pumped his fist in the air and yelled out "yes!" just to watch Silver laugh.

After a quick goodbye to Gneiss and Nephrite, Feldspar followed Silver back to his tree. They settled cross-legged on Silver's living room floor, eating the cake straight from the pan. It was the best cheesecake Feldspar had ever had, smooth and creamy with a hint of some spice he couldn't place. Cardamom perhaps, he thought.

"You're kind of a mess," Silver said, breaking Feldspar out of his cheesecake trance. He leaned forward to wipe a smudge of cheesecake from Feldspar's cheek. He saw Feldspar's smile flicker and instantly realized the double meaning of what he'd said. He licked the cheesecake from his finger as Feldspar's eyes tracked the movement. He realized he might as well just admit it. His mental list of Feldspar's shortcomings was feeling less relevant by the second. "Actually, you're a huge mess," he said teasingly. "But I like you anyway."