Silver Lining Playbook

It wasn't a proud moment. But I wasn't concerned about missing it, because there would be plenty of them in the months to follow.

*****

After my fifth meeting with the psychologist, she gave her professional opinion on what was wrong with me.

I had heard of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. Who hadn't? But that was her diagnoses for me. PTSD. And guess what, the diagnoses came with a prescription for Prozac and Zoloft.

The drugs changed everything for me. They gave me exactly what I wanted...time away. And time away was exactly what I got. For the next six months, I was a zombie. I rarely left the house that I had grown to hate. I never once faced reality about anything. Bathing became a chore. Eating was only done when needed to stay alive. But drinking? Yes, drinking. It seemed to take the edge off of the drugs. I loved the combination of hard liquor and pills. The proper mix of both worked wonders for me, right up until I ended up in the hospital.

Evidently the mixture of pills two at a time, every few hours and booze by the glassful isn't nearly as good for you as one might think.

The stomach pump, 28 days of mandatory "cold turkey" rehab, and the stigma of always being remembered as the guy who overdosed, wasn't nearly as bad as when they sent me home. Home to the same condo the ambulance had taken me from, but there I was, weaker, but stronger.

A long hard look at my life and the reality of things surrounding it didn't make me feel any better. In fact, the thought of having lost almost a year somewhere along the way only made me feel worse. It was harsh to think what a shitty son, brother, and friend I had been to those around me. But I hoped I could, and would, put it all behind me. I wanted it to be in the past. I needed a change.

*****

Spending the next few weeks getting caught up on what had happened in the world while I was "on hiatus", helped. I found a letter from Lauren. I put it away without opening it. I found out my cell service and cable service had been cutoff. And I found a letter from my place of employment saying, although it was in their best interest to keep me on payroll until my "condition improved", they would be moving in a different direction when I was given a clean bill of health.

Surprisingly, the only thing that worried me, was the fact I'd have to wait 48 hours to have service restored to my phone and T.V.

So, there I was. Alone at 26-years-old. The girl and job I though I loved were gone, with little likelihood of finding replacements for either.

The only thing that hadn't left my side the whole time, was my friend Alex. He stuck by me through the entire ordeal. And when I hit rock bottom, he helped me get back on my feet, and when I did, he was the one who put his reputation on the line and got me a job. And it's the reason why I never wanted to let him down.

*****

The UBER driver dropped me off outside of Morgan and Alex's place three minutes before I was due to arrive.

Walking up to the huge glass doors on the outside of their condo complex, I looked at my reflection and was happy with what I chose to wear. Jeans, white button-down dress shirt and my favorite Brooks Brothers blazer. The brown leather belt and matching shoes seemed like the perfect accessories.

"Tyler. Oh my god. It's so good to see you." One of Morgan's friends had opened the door when I knocked. She was always the life at any of Morgan and Alex's parties, and her husband was a super nice guy.

"Joanie. Great to see you again."

"It's great to see you, Tyler. I heard you went through a bit of a rough patch."

"A bit, but that's behind me now. So, how have you been?" I asked to change the subject.

"Can't complain. John's good to me, but the kids are a pain in the ass. Family shit gets in the way of me having fun anymore." She laughed. "Want me to take the bag?" She was pointing at the fancy bag the girl at the liquor store had put the wine in.

"Sure, it's..."

"Holy shit. Tyler, you are definitely invited to our next party." Her hand inside the bag pulled up the bottles so that she could see what they were. "John, how come none of your asshole friends bring wine like this when we invite them over?" John looked at her, then at me. He had absolutely no idea what she was talking about.

"Easy bitch. I get invited to your parties," Alex teased as he hugged her from behind.

"I know. Alex, I gotta say, you and Morg are great at hosting, but you don't know shit about wine. Good thing your best friend is your personal sommelier." And in a flash, she was gone.

"Buddy." Alex hugged me and slapped my back. "Looking sharp. With any luck, we'll get you laid tonight." He held me tight and tried to say something, but Morgan appeared out of nowhere.

"Ty, my goodness. Lookin handsome."

"Thanks Morgan. You look beautiful, as usual. Thanks for inviting me tonight." I hugged her and pecked her cheek.

"Well, according to Joanie, you're going to be getting invited to a lot more parties. What did you bring tonight?"

"Mondavi. A two thousand fourteen Maestro. You should probably hide it from her." Morgan's head spun, and seconds later, Alex and I chuckled when we heard Morgan telling her friend to, "give me those, bitch".

There had to have been 20 people lingering around. Maybe 30 once I got a better look.

Morgan and Alex bought this condo together a few months back and at just over 3500 square feet, it was huge.

"Listen buddy," Alex said. "I'm not kidding. At least three of the ladies here tonight, are single. So don't settle on the first one, shop around. But before that, I need to ask you something." His eyes moving to where Morgan was standing. He turned away from her and reached into his pocket. Only one thing could possibly be in the purple velvet box that he pulled out. "I'm going to ask her tonight."

"Congratulations, man. I'm so happy for you." I shook his hand so that Morgan couldn't see the interaction.

Alex leaned closer so only I could hear.

"Before I ask her, I need to know that you'll be my best man." His request made me feel special.

"With honor."

Alex left me by the kitchen island and headed off to do all the things a good host does. Taking in the scenery, I noticed everything that had gone into making the night a success. Everything, down to the smallest detail was perfect. Gone were the days where a box of wine, a couple cases of beer in an ice filled cooler and a tray of pizza was considered a party. Now it was a little higher end.

Like every party my friend threw, I found myself backed into a corner. Not by anything other than my own doing. I always found a spot where I could watch what was going on around me and no one could sneak up from behind, but since they had purchased this new place, the open concept design made it more difficult for me to do so.

The closest thing to safety seemed to be the last stool at the end of their long island. It wasn't in a corner, but it would have to do.

The party people mingled, and a few dropped by to speak with me. Some I knew, others, I had never seen before in my life. But there were a couple of guests that I knew had been specifically invited for me.

Kim, the first girl to approach me played it very coy. She came over and asked if I had noticed any more of the shrimp dip that was being passed around, and when the chance arose, she sat on the stool next to me.

"So, Morgan tells me you and Alex golf together. Kim by the way." She stuck out the hand that didn't have a plate in it.

"Nice to meet you. And no to golf. We work together. Play hockey and baseball on the same team, but not much golf. Tyler by the way." Kim's laugh was her best feature. Morgan probably asked her to come at Alex's request, but she wasn't what I was looking for in a woman, because she was the polar opposite of Lauren.

"Why not golf? Oh my god, don't let my father hear that. He goes out at least four times a week, but that's probably just to get away from my mother. I think she drives him a bit crazy. Now that he's retired, he spends a lot of time around the house, so golfing is the break he needs. Are you sure you didn't see any more of the crab dip? It's pretty good."

"Shrimp dip?" I corrected.

"Does it really matter? Once they chop it up and put mayo on it, they can tell you it's lobster and you really won't know the difference, would you?"

"I would."

"Would you?" She seemed shocked that I could tell the difference between shrimp, crab, and lobster.

"Do you and Morgan work together?" I tried to re-route the seafood conversation.

"No, we met at the gym. I'm not sure why she goes. I mean look at her. That ass is like a rock. And her cardio is off the hook. I watched her on the treadmill a couple days ago. She was on an incline and was booking it. Seven miles per hour. On an incline. Insane. She's a beast when it comes to..."

A body pressed between the two of us and leaned over the counter as if looking for something on the other side and held its position there. At first, I wasn't sure who it was, but I immediately inhaled deeply. I loved the fresh, floral scent coming from the brunette.

Kim leaned back, trying to see what was going on, and who was pushing her away, but she didn't have too. The intruder spoke to her first.

"You Kim?" the girl asked.

"Yes. Yes, I am."

"Yeah, well Morgan needs you in the bedroom," the leaner said.

"Oh. Okay then. Hold my spot for me." Kim jumped off of her stool and headed for the bedroom.

"Not likely," said the girl as she eased herself into the still warm seat and picked up what appeared to be a Manhattan. She turned to me and gave an evil smile that I'd seen a time or two. "Now you owe me."

"May I ask for what?"

"For what? Try for getting rid of the crazy cat lady." Her smile widening even more as she watched Kim frantically looking for the hostess.

"So, Haley, how are you these days?"

"Not bad psycho. You?"

"Psycho? Yeah...I guess it takes one to know one."

"Oh, I know. You still swiping right on unsuspecting girls Tyler?"

"Only on you Haley."

Haley was Morgan's younger sister. A good-looking woman. Very good looking in fact. Dark hair compared to Morgan's blonde locks. Same height. I assumed the same weight. As far as her body, you knew she has a great one, but she kept it hidden away and never really put it out there on display.

We had known one another for about the same amount of time I'd known Morgan. We met on the day Alex and Morgan moved in together. She and her husband, yes husband, helped out with the move. They seemed to be alright at the time, but over the next few months, it all fell apart for them. I knew they'd split apart but didn't know all the details.

Lately, Haley had been anti almost all things in life. Her views of femininity varied on what day it was, but no matter the day, I'd never seen her wearing anything anyone would call revealing or flattering. For some unknown reason, she always seemed to loathe me. And when I accidently swiped right on her picture while I was in a drunken stupor, it didn't put me into her good graces.

Looking at Haley sitting next to me on a stool that, minutes earlier, belonged to a girl I had a chance with, I now made idle conversation with one who hated me.

"So, how is the crazy business these days?" I asked.

"Business is good. Unlike you, I don't try to hide it from others. I own mine. Even got a tattoo to honor it."

"Well, I own mine too. I just haven't had the time to get all inked up, and I haven't seen you around enough to keep you up to date on the juicy straight-jacket and rubber room details," I said.

"Details? You think I need details? Lauren's a cunt. I'm surprised they didn't find you hanging off the balcony. Just mention Lauren's name and I wanna puke. 'nough said." Using a word like cunt at a wine and cheese party usually turns some heads, and tonight was no exception. "What..." she asked the people who had stopped talking so that they could look our way. "I'm not kidding. I knew that bitch was a piece of shit the first time I met her. She stole a pair of my favorite jeans. Did Morgan ever tell you about it?"

"Nope," I lied.

Morgan had in fact told me the entire story while I was in the hospital. Haley had accused Lauren of stealing cloths from her when she moved into Morgan's place and all hell broke loose. Apparently, the claws came out, and fur flew.

"Well lucky you. I'll save the story for another day. It's quite entertaining."

"Mitch?" I asked about her ex-husband.

"Why does everybody always bring that cocksucker up?" Those who hadn't turned to look at us when Haley used the word "cunt" now looked to see who had said "cocksucker".

"You asked about Lauren," I reminded her.

"Like fuck I did. I told you that she was a..." I put my hand over her mouth before she dropped the "C" word again. "Okay. I didn't ask. I merely expressed an opinion about her. But, like a fucking dick you asked me about Mitch."

"Only because it's been a few months and I see you still have your wedding ring on."

"Yeah, I still wear the ring. It's worth eight grand. Why the hell wouldn't I wear it, numb nuts?" Such a pretty girl. Such a foul mouth.

"You could put it on another finger."

"Well Dr. Tyler, I don't think it matters what finger I wear it on. Anyone who knows me, knows what a truckload of damaged goods I am. So, I could wear the fucking thing as a clit ring, and it still wouldn't attract any suitors. Now, would it?" Luckily, her voice was a bit lower this time.

In a move very similar, if not exactly like the one Haley had used earlier, a tall redhead squeezed between us and pointed at Morgan.

"Looks like you are being summoned," said the redhead.

Haley's head snapped between me, her sister, and the redhead. Sure enough, Morgan was beckoning her sister over. Haley was done for. Apparently, Morgan heard the tirade of expletives exploding from her sister's mouth.

"Well Psycho, I hope you find yourself," she said as she slid off her seat.

I wanted to say, "Find myself? Do you honestly think two people as needy as us can "find" ourselves? What the fuck Haley. If you think we can find ourselves, you have some very high aspirations for us." Instead, I said: "Right back at yah." It was my somewhat pitiful parting shot.

The redhead, who's name turned out to be Emma, was a very good-looking woman with a much more laidback and casual approach than Kim. Her self-introduction and the conversation she started genuinely put me at ease.

"She a friend of yours?" Emma asked moving her chin so that I knew she was talking about Haley.

"Friend? Yeah, not so much. She's Morgan's little sister. I only know her through Morgan and Alex."

"Why did she refer to you as a psycho?"

"Long story."

"I have all night."

Everything about Emma interested me, but, just when our conversation was starting to heat up, Alex messed it up by tapping a knife on the side of his wine glass. Everyone in the room thought he was going to make a toast, but he surprised everyone in the room by getting down on one knee in front of his girlfriend. Everyone but me, that is.

Alex gave a speech about the first night he and Morgan met. He purposely omitted Lauren from the story, but he didn't need to. He professed his undying love and told tidbits of things that had happened over the past year. Many of the things he talked about, I had missed.

Morgan on the other hand was more of a comedian about their relationship. She told a story about why she shouldn't marry my best friend.

"So, he sent me Valentine Days flowers. We had been together, what, maybe five months. I opened the card and thought some little kid wrote the note. It was written in crayon. As soon as I started to read it, I blushed and knew no kid wrote it." She looked around the room waiting for a prompt to continue.

"Morgan, what did the card say?" I helped her out.

She blushed and pretended to cover her eyes.

"It said, 'Baby, I loved it when you asked me to move into your place. And I especially love it when you rub your pussy all over my face.' My mother and father read it for Christ sakes. They hated him instantly."

The girls cried in happiness. The guys laughed and high-fived one another. It was a night neither the host nor hostess would ever forget.

Alex's last toast of the night was an introduction of me as his best man, and an apology because Morgan's maid-of-honor was unable to attend.

Yes, it turned out Lauren was going to be in the wedding party, and she would be standing next to me.

I helped clean-up a bit before leaving. Unfortunately, the redhead snuck out without saying goodbye. Haley thought she was doing me a solid by telling Emma I was hovering on the cusp of being gay. So, if she had any aspirations of dating me, she had better think again.

The third lady Alex told me about, Liz, was around earlier in the night, but at some point, she hooked up with one of Alex's other friends and hadn't been seen since.

*****

Sunday, I jumped right up on the best man band wagon. I researched the dos, and don'ts of the job. I truly looked forward to being there for Alex. It would be a show of appreciation for the many things he had done for me.

I printed off calendar pages for the next three months and with a blue hi-liter, marked dates that might work for things I wanted to plan. Monday morning, it was back to business.

Alex was mid phone call when I sat down by his desk. He shook his head and put two pointed fingers to his temple and pretended to pull an imaginary trigger. When the call concluded, he was all over me.

"Buddy, what a night. Thanks for helping out. Did you happen to get a number from Kim or Emma? It looked like things were going well for you."

"Yeah, it was a great night. And no. No numbers. Although I really do like talking with Emma." There was a pause while Alex wrote something down. "Listen, I'm really happy for you, but are you sure you still want me as best man? You know, with Lauren being there and being in the wedding party?"

"Stop. Don't even start with this shit. You can both be in the wedding party. Hell, you'll be banging Emma by then anyway, so no worries." He looked at me and put his hand on my shoulder. "You can pull this off buddy. It will be the last time you have to be near her. It will put it to rest forever."

I knew he was right. Or should I say I hoped he was.

*****

At lunch we agreed on a boy's weekend. No bachelor party, no strippers, no problem. Those weren't things that I was planning anyway.

Alex questioned what I had in mind, but I only had a rough plan in place, and was still working out the fine details. I told him I wanted to get together with him and Morgan for dinner at my place, so we could discuss some of the details.

After speaking to Morgan about it and having some time to think about the idea of eating at my place, he back peddled a bit.

"Hey, are you sure about Saturday night. I mean, it might be easier if the three of us went out somewhere to eat. Morgan says she doesn't want to be any trouble."

I smiled to myself when Alex politely tried to say Morgan was afraid to come over to my place. It had been many months since she had been there, and when she last was, I was at the lowest point of my life.

"It's no trouble at all. Tell her I've even picked up the empty pizza boxes and used condoms."

Alex thought about for a few seconds. He knew that when we lived together, I was the cleaner of the two of us. He probably never picked up after himself once. But he was likely remembering my meltdown and what my place looked like then.

"Okay. We'll go out for dinner. Just stop by early so we can have a drink. I picked up another bottle of that French Bordeaux she likes so much."

With a sigh of relief, he agreed.