Silver Lining Playbook

"I was happy to do it. You know how much I love you, and Morgan is part of that package, so..."

Alex put his hand up.

"Tyler, you are literally one of my brothers."

We faked toasted with coffee mugs and turned our attention to the sports news. Like the old days when, long before extensive renovations, we would spend an entire Sunday doing the exact same thing.

"Hungry?" I asked.

"Oh, yeah. Let me help." Alex offer offered.

"I got it."

"Come on, I'll do the eggs," he offered again.

"Sorry, I heard you last night, and I watched you rubbing your bag like six times this morning."

Alex laughed and put his hand back in his underwear, just to prove a point.

"Okay, I'll go grab a shower."

Standing up, he dropped his boxers and pretended to toss them my way.

"You might wanna put those back on."

"Why? Both you and Morgan have seen my junk."

"True, but your future sister-in-law is right down the hall."

Alex quickly pulled his underwear back on and sat back down.

He took another sip of his sugar heavy coffee and looked at me. Then he moved closer to where I was standing.

"Careful man. She's crazy as a bag of snakes."

His words shocked me. At that point, I wasn't certain who he meant.

"Crazy? So what, why do I have to be careful?"

Alex leaned over the island and stretched his neck to look down the hallway.

"Haley comes with a shit ton of baggage. She's batshit crazy sometimes."

"If you think she's crazy, what do you think about me? I must be in the same category."

"Look Tyler, no one thinks you're crazy. Disturbed, yes. Crazy, no. But her..." What he said didn't make me feel any better.

"I think with Haley, it's more of an act or maybe a defense mechanism." I couldn't believe I was defending my nemesis.

"No man. Her defense is anger. You heard about Lauren's car, right."

"What about Lauren's car?"

"Apparently, she was talking about how she was behind on the payments and the loan company was threatening to repossess it. So, she wakes up one night and the fucking thing is on fire in the parking lot."

"How is Haley involved in this story?"

"Well, two days later, the insurance company gets an 'anonymous tip'. The person said Lauren burned her car to collect the insurance money. It cost her thousands in legal fees to get out of the mess."

"So, maybe..."

"Smashed windows. Egged house. 'Slut, Cunt, Whore and Thief' all kinds of nice words scratched into the paint of her new car and Liam's. And each time something happened, Haley was 'Away'."

"Was anything ever proved?"

"No, but..."

"Look, Alex, she's never done anything to me, has she?"

"Yeah? Well, you be the judge. Because, sometime during the night, Haley texted Morgan and told her you guys hooked up. Said you banged her a few times, then pretended to sleep on the couch so we wouldn't get upset."

The shock on my face must have been very evident.

"No?" he asked.

"Fuck no. I mean, she's a very attractive girl, but with all the shit in my life and her being Morgan's sister. Not to mention the shit she deals with. I mean it probably wouldn't end well. Right?"

"So...you didn't?"

I shook my head side to side.

"A hand-job?"

I shook my head again.

"Maybe, you guys went down on each other?" He was phishing with a huge smile on his face.

"Not even close. Nothing." I reassured him.

"Did you make a date to hook up?" He wasn't letting it go.

"Not likely." I said louder than I should have.

"Not likely what?" came a voice.

Morgan was rounding the corner, heading into the kitchen area. Her hair was a mess, and she appeared to be naked under the shirt Alex had worn last night.

"My two men," she said as she hugged each of us. "Tyler, I don't know if Alex told you yet, but wow. What a great time last night. And the decorations...wow."

"Well, thank you. I'm glad you had fun, but I had help. Haley did all the decorations. I didn't have any part of it."

"Then thank you both." She squeezed her almost naked body into me from behind.

Morgan made herself a coffee. Hers was black and sugarless, unlike that of her man's. When the pod stopped dripping, she picked up the mug and followed Alex toward the shower.

Fifteen minutes later, the bacon and eggs were cooked and being kept warm, while the bread was waiting at the ready to be toasted. Haley came into view shortly after I buttered the first slice.

"Morning," I said politely, but with a bit of distain in my voice.

"Morning lover," Haley called out over the countertop. I didn't even bother to turn around. If she had actually sent her sister a text during the night, then there was no need to keep going over it.

Breakfast for the four of us was unusually quiet. We talked, but there was an uneasiness in the air. And two hours later, when Alex announced that he and Morgan would give Haley a ride home, I couldn't have been any more relieved.

A jog helped clear my head, but not nearly as much as I needed it to. So, with a brain full of mixed emotions, I spent the entire afternoon unfocused and thinking about everything that had happened in the past 24 hours.

There were a bunch of "what if's" floating around. What if I had slept with Haley? I mean we're both single. She's a very good-looking girl. Bat shit crazy, but good looking. Or, what if something deeper would have happened with Lauren? What if she wasn't just looking around? What if she was serious and wanted to change things back to the way they used to be? What if she wanted to...?

*****

By Monday morning, my head had cleared. I was back to normal. Somewhat.

I walked past Alex's cubicle, and he immediately stood and followed me. Without even the slightest indication that I knew he was there, I put down my stuff, switched on my computer, plugged in my phone, sat in my chair, and finally turned and looked at him sitting in the spare chair.

"What?" I asked.

"Oh, nothing I guess." His smile was ear to ear. "I just wanted to be the first to congratulate you on being a daddy. Haley called last night. She did an early pregnancy test. Looks like it's going to be twins."

"You think that's funny you prick?"

"Hey, we work in an environment where..." I stopped him dead in his tracks.

"We work in an environment where, if you don't shut the fuck up, you'll catch a slap in about three seconds." I put my hand up and made like I was going to give him one.

"Easy buddy. I'm only messing with you. Considering we're going to be brother in-laws, I thought it was okay." I raised my hand again. "And before you go all UFC on my ass, Haley told Morgan on the way home yesterday that she was trying to get you into trouble. That's why she texted those things."

"Trouble? Who the hell would I get in trouble with? I'm single and she's hot. I'd be more likely to get high fives for being with her. Trouble? She really is fucking crazy."

After all the chitchat about Haley came to an end, we sat and shot the shit about Saturday night for a while until something in Alex's head clicked.

"Did you mention a golf get away to Morgan?"

"I did. I made a few a few calls and told some people that my asshole buddy was getting married. They all felt sorry for your future wife, so they hooked us up. I booked Pine Valley G.C. and Shinnecock Hills." My buddy was staring at me with his mouth wide open. "What? I'm still waiting to hear back about National Golf Links of America. You mentioned that place last year."

His face went well beyond pale. The blood had left it and he looked like he was about to collapse. I knew those were bucket list golf courses for him, but I didn't expect him to look like he did. I was expecting him to be happier.

"Are you kidding me?"

"What?" Alex looked like he was going to puke. "Buddy, what is it?"

"Fuck my fucking life." He looked at the ground and shook his head. "Morgan suggested going to Lake Minnetonka with the group from your house. Everyone got along so well, she called her parents and booked their place for a long weekend. I thought, like a fucking dummy, I'd be doing you a favor, because I know you don't like golf."

I couldn't contain my laughter.

"So, you're telling me that instead of a beer and golf weekend with the boys, you'll be spending your stag weekend doing arts and crafts, and hunting through antique shops, at your future in-laws place no less?"

"Not funny Tyler. Not funny at all."

"Oh, it is from where I'm sitting." I put my hand over my mouth to hide my smile. Very funny indeed.

And for the next two weeks, not a word was said about the golf trip. But to rub it in a little, I twice joined Alex, Doug and one of the other groomsmen for a round of golf at a local club. And Doug had no issues with giving it to his younger brother about passing up a great golf trip, and all Alex did was hang his head.

*****

At work, on the Thursday before we left that night, Alex and I went over our lists of things to bring.

"So, you're telling me that we're going to a cottage, but we don't have to bring any food or drink?" I questioned the groom.

"Yes. I mean no. Yes, that's what I'm telling you. No, we don't have to bring anything. Morgan's parents are suppling everything."

"Perfect. So, no sleeping bag or any of that shit?"

"It's not that kind of cottage Tyler." Alex checked his list and gave me puppy dog eyes.

"What?"

"You still driving?" he asked.

"Yeah, as long as Morgan doesn't overpack. Remember, it's an SUV, not a U-Haul."

"Tyler, I...um..." He wanted something. I knew him too well.

"Just ask you pussy."

"Are you okay if Haley jumps in with us? I...she doesn't have a way to get...I mean, she has a way...she just doesn't want to ride up alone."

"Yeah, that's fine. Tell her not to overpack."

"I don't think that will be a problem, she practically lives there on every long weekend."

Oh yeah. It had gone right over my head. Morgan's parents were also...yep. Missed that one.

*****

The pick-up point for everyone was Alex's place. It was the closest intersection to the highway, and it made the most sense.

After what Alex had said about the cottage, I wasn't surprised by how few bags were curbside when I pulled up. The bags he and I brought took up way more space than the girls. What did surprise me was how incredibly hot Haley looked.

Her long dark hair was tied up in a loose bun that allowed anyone looking a good view of her pretty face and long neck. To accentuate that, she was wearing a tight fitting Grateful Dead t-shirt and a pair of ripped jean shorts and flip flops. She looked great.

Without much of an argument, Alex ended up winning / cheating his way through a game of rock / paper / scissors and claimed the shotgun position. He became my co-pilot for the next hour and a bit.

The ride was fairly uneventful. There was one unscheduled stop for Slurpee's, but that was it. And when I followed the given directions and pulled into the huge semi-circle driveway. I was immediately blown away by the view.

"Holy shit! You call this a cottage?" All three of my passengers laughed as they piled out of the vehicle.

The lake water sparkled brightly enough that it made me glad I was wearing sunglasses. The wide yard led down to the shore where a dock and a boathouse waited for people to use them for their weekend enjoyment. And everything else appeared as though it was well planned out to entertain any guests that might be lucky enough to be invited.

With absolutely nothing to do but enjoy the surroundings, I put my gear in the designated sleep area I was assigned and prepared for a swim.

In minutes, Alex was by my side.

"Whaddya think?" he asked.

"It's incredible. I can't imagine being able to have this place any weekend I wanted." I looked over at Alex and he was smiling like a mad man. So, I tried the burst his bubble. "Kinda makes me wish I'd seen Morgan first."

"Dick." he said as he splashed an arm full of water in my direction.

*****

A couple of hours passed as we hung out in the water. Then slowly but surely, the others started to arrive. Car after car lined the grass and gravel driveway as they unloaded for our getaway.

By nightfall I had prepped the firepit for a bonfire and was starting to think my luck had improved, until Lauren and her husband showed up. Yeah, Barbie and Ken had finally shown. Lauren got out of the car looking like she had just stepped out of a magazine, not like she had just flown for two hours and driven for two more. The short floral dress and the way she wore her hair were perfect.

With a "whosh" the flame caught hold of the small amount of the accelerant I had poured on the wood and flames began dancing to life.

"You okay buddy?" Alex asked, putting his hand on my shoulder.

We were both looking at Lauren as she made her rounds. She was handing out hugs and kisses to everyone near her. For a second, I wasn't sure what bothered me more, the fact she was there or the fact she looked so fucking good.

"Yep. Just thinking about pouring the rest of this gas over my own head and jumping into the fire," I said semi jokingly.

"Before you do, let me ask if anyone's hungry. I'd hate to waste a good pig roast for nothing," he said with a chuckle.

"Nice. Way to have my back. Great friend you turned out to be, you asshole." And he was. I loved him as much as anyone in my life.

With the impromptu pig roast put on the back burner, Morgan and the girls prepped the catered salads and beef. Everyone made plates and mingled. And with the amount of booze that was being tossed around, thing started to lighten up.

"Ty...Tyler..." Lauren was standing off to the side of the fire as she watched me put another half log onto the already burning embers.

"Lauren." I relied coldly.

"I...I was wondering. Maybe we could take a walk? It's a really nice night. Maybe we could talk about a few things." She spoke in a very low voice. Almost as if she were hiding her request from the other guests.

"I'm not much for walking on nice nights anymore," I told her without looking in her direction.

"Why is that?"

"Because lately, I enjoy walking in the rain more. That way no one can see all of pain and tears you caused me." I placed the last log on the fire and walked away from her.

*****

The boathouse was probably as far away from the fire as possible, so I headed there. Walking straight to the cooler I opened it and looked at all of my options. With plenty to choose from, I picked my poison. The frosty can of Diet Coke popped open and didn't stand a chance as it washed the smoke and venom from my throat.

"I'll take one of those if you're buying." Haley was sitting in the shadows on an Adirondack chair. She was watching the shore lights, the stars, and the flames from other fires bouncing over the rippling water in front of her.

Without hesitation, I pulled two more of the icy beverages from the full cooler.

"What a beautiful view," I said taking a seat beside her.

"Thanks. It's new. I put it on in case it gets too cool tonight. But I appreciate the compliment."

"What?" I asked.

"Oh. Sorry, when you said beautiful view, I just assumed that you meant me." Haley turned her head toward me and smiled. "I should have known better. I mean how would I ever get a compliment out of you when your ex and your dream girl are just up the hill?"

Honestly. I felt like shaking my can of soda and letting it spray the pair of us. Instead, I flicked a piece of ice from my can at her and got up to walk away.

I made it about a couple hundred yards down the beach before she caught up with me.

"Wait. Tyler. For fuck sakes, stop."

I kept walking.

"Jesus Christ, at least slow down."

My pace seemed to increase on its own.

"Wait a second you asshole."

I stopped and turned.

"Haley, what the hell is your problem? I've got enough shit going on in my head. I don't need you in there too."

She lowered her head and looked at the sand for the longest time. Finally, from out of nowhere, her hand found mine in the darkness.

"Walk with me?" she asked.

Haley guided me down the shoreline to a rocky point where we sat and watched the water. We had not spoken a word in 20 minutes. When we found the spot where she wanted to sit, she started.

"Not that you care, but I probably hate her more than you do."

I knew who she was talking about. I didn't need to ask.

"She did it out of spite. She was trying to hurt me. The bitch hated that my sister and I were so close. It ate her up because she felt she was missing out. So, she did little things. Lots of little things. She stole money from Morgan and told her that it was me. Money? I work, and, well, look around. I don't need money. Then she stole my goddamned jeans. Jeans for Christ's sake. And those were small compared to the biggie. She told everyone who would listen that she was going to "fuck" my husband. Show him what a real woman was like, and guess what, she was right. He left me behind and followed her."

There were tears in her eyes as she told me her story. I had an awful feeling about it, because I wanted to walk away. But I didn't. For some odd reason, I stayed and listened.

"When she was finally done with him, she sent him back to me." Haley wiped her eyes with the sleeve of her hoodie. "I suffer from a low self-esteem you know. And do you think what he did to me helped? Not very much, I can promise you that. But like some self-deprecating skank, I took him back. Tail between my legs. Begging for her leftovers. I took him back."

She sipped at her soda and took time before she said anything else. I tossed a few small stones into the water as I waited. The usually tough Haley, with a hide of leather, let a small sob escape and once again wiped her eyes on the sleeve that was becoming increasingly damp.

"Then, she fucked him again. I thought maybe we had made it past the bump in the road that Lauren was, but she couldn't handle it when I took him back. She couldn't take that I had him back in my life, so she fucked him again." She turned and stared at me. I knew what was coming and it hurt before the words even came out of her mouth. "She did it while she was with you. You know that don't you?"

"Yeah, I do. She's told me a hundred times. I thought she was just being mean to me, so I was never sure it was true until now." I held her stare. "Haley, I have no idea what you are feeling, but you have to free your heart. If we keep getting upset every time we see her, she's won the battle." I put my hand on her knee and squeeze it lightly. "Who am I to talk, but I'm over being a hapless asshole when I think of her. I'm done with her. I keep telling myself I've moved on, but I really have. Now and forever, I'm over her and I'll never let her hurt me again. You should try to do the same."

"Easy for you to say. I was at the party at Morgan's. I saw how many girls hit on you."

"Yeah, well. Clearly, it was a set-up. Alex was trying to do me a favor." The tears in her eyes had stopped flowing, but she gave another cautionary wipe just in case. "You know you're attractive, right? I mean, you're very easy to look at. Way better looking than Lauren. And I'm not just saying it to make you feel better. It's just...well...you come off as being a wee bit on the crazy side."

Haley's laugh was infectious. A cross between a cry for help and a cry of ecstasy. Either way, she cocked her eyebrow and smiled.

"A wee bit," she said in an Irish brogue.

I held my finger up so she could see. I put my thumb and index finger about a half inch apart, then spread them as far as they could possibly go.

"Sounds close enough to a compliment, so I'll take it as one." She touched the top of my hand. "Thank you, kind sir."

By the time we returned to the cottage the fire had dwindled down to just red-hot coals and everyone in our group had gone to bed.