All Comments on 'Some Reflections on Sex'

Great start with good insights.

Did you and your wife get on a good track for satisfactory regular sex? Inquiring minds want to know. ;-)

Regarding getting on a track for regular sex with my wife; this did not happen and if I had my time over I think if we had put more effort into getting together more often before the relationship was terminal maybe things may have gone better. Then again it may have made no difference. Apart from sex we weren’t a great match. We once had sex after I had moved out. We were still being civil at times and I was occasionally sleeping over in the spare bedroom. My clothes were in the master bedroom. Jo was still in bed when I knocked and asked if I could grab some clothes. She was awake, sitting up reading a book. I was wearing just a towel. Without saying a word she gestured me over and loosened the towel. Fabulous bittersweet sex followed that turned out to be our last.

why you think most relationships are ending nowadays

Great question and one that is worth spending time reflecting on. I think sexual differences/incompatibility would be not in the top ten reasons. Different expectations, different values, wanting to spend time in different ways, different life experiences prior to the relationship starting. I’d love to meet some of the women with whom the relationship failed the first time again with more life experience under my belt. I was very emotionally immature and am less so now but hope to keep learning. There is a lot of downtime between sex and being ‘in love’ is a state that I don’t understand. I know what infatuation and lust feel like. Just not sure about love. Relationships that last and last must be based on deep affection, admiration, trust etc etc. my 2 longest relationships have been 15 years and 12 years and counting but both have been full of uncertainty and sometimes a feeling that this isn’t going to last but it’s pretty good most of the time. Do you settle for ‘pretty good most of the time’ when one grows up with unrealistic media depictions of romance, ‘soul mates’ and forever?