Something Shady

"I hope you weren't too distracted that you couldn't resume studying."

He nodded. "Kind of. But then I took care of it."

She knew what he meant. "Okay, so how'd you do on the test?"

"Got a B. But if not for you, maybe I would have aced it." He could tell by her wry look that she was uncertain if he was serious or joking. "But that's okay," he added with a grin, "hearing you talk like that was well worth it." He trained his eyes on her thighs, crossed and half-exposed. "You said you were making your legs nice and smooth."

She nudged closer to where their legs touched, his khakis against her bare skin. "Yes, and you can feel for yourself."

He began sliding a hand over her thigh. "Mmm, nice." Nice also was the sweet, sexy scent he caught wafting up from her translucent skin. "You must have used more lotion."

"I did, just for you." She took another sip of wine. Then, after placing her glass down on an end table, she put her arms around him and said, "Billy, I think it's time we go upstairs."

He followed her up the carpeted staircase. He'd seen Chip's parents' bedroom, but had never been in there for any length of time. It was an addition to the house that the Kleins had built years ago. It had scatter rugs on hardwood flooring, bookshelves and that twenty-five-inch Sony Trinitron TV that Sherri had been watching when she called Billy that night. And other things--a few pairs of dumbbells that sat on one of the scatter rugs.

This was as surreal as surreal got, Billy thought, the stuff good dreams are made of. Only this wasn't a dream, watching Sherri Klein pull the blue ribbon from her hair, shake her head and then reach back, unzipper her dress, step out of it and then stand before him in nothing but a red bra, which she duly unsnapped and let fall to the floor. The perfect curve of her hips, her nearly flat stomach and breasts, not big but with pointy nipples that seemed to cry out for his tongue...man-o-man, the stuff good dreams are made of. Of course, this wasn't a dream, though it still kind of felt that way--so implausible, so far-fetched. And yet, there she stood, stunningly beautiful, this woman whose sensual charms he had admired since he was old enough to date. And it was all for him. Billy couldn't do much more at this impossibly exciting moment but stare.

She stepped forward, lifted off his pull-over jersey, and then planted a few kisses on his nearly hairless chest. "I'll let you do the rest," she said. She then climbed into bed.

She welcomed his naked self with open arms, literally, reaching out and embracing him as he eased himself onto her firm breasts. "This is so amazing," he said.

"I'm pretty amazed myself," she said.

"First off, how about I give you a massage?"

"That would be great."

She turned onto her stomach, letting her head rest against her hands. Massages were part of Billy and Allyson's sex life--he knew what he was doing. He moved his soothing hands over the lovely curvature of Sherri's back, over her shoulders, her thighs, shapely calves and derriere. The flatness and cellulite that typically crept into aging women's butts was missing here. Sherri had a cute butt, so cute he couldn't resist kissing it.

"Ooo," Sherri moaned in response. She had her eyes closed, appeared totally relaxed. "I hope I'm not putting you to sleep," he said.

She raised her head. "You could if I let you. You're really good." She turned onto her back. "But I won't because I want you to make love to me. Now kiss me."

Closing his eyes, he put his lips to hers. He liked the way she tasted, something akin to menthol, like she had been sucking on a mint. Her skin, so soft, so warm, like a comforting blanket--just as he had imagined in those fantasies of his. Exciting was too weak a word to describe how he felt at this shining moment, sharing his body with hers, high on her lovely feminine scent and the passion that she apparently felt for him.

His cock, leaking pre-cum, had reached its apogee. He was ready, ready to enter her at any moment. Slipping a finger into her pussy told him that her body was in sync with his. Even so, he wanted to extend the foreplay a little while longer. He kissed her neck, lovely breasts, tummy and then further south. Obviously, these were places where she wanted him to go, for she uttered nary a complaint. On the contrary, she moaned in delight as his tongue worked its magic, swishing over her "tinkle," as he once heard her refer to that shaved and now soaking wet organ between her legs. "Oh Billy, oh Billy!" she cried, music to his ears, music that got even lovelier when she said, "Make love to me."

She guided him into her, then clamped her legs around him. "You're so good, Billy, you're so damn good," she said, barely getting the words out between her heavy breathing. Such a nice-looking kid, she thought, looking up at him, seeing the blond hair that fell halfway over his eyes, smiling down on her and kissing her between thrusts. Oh, how she loved that--warm, soft kisses combined with a hard cock. He was giving her something that she had needed for a long time, never dreaming, until recently, that her giver would be Billy Shane. She cried out, "Oh, Billy, I could do this all night with you."

"I wish I had all night," he said.

She wished he did, too, because, ohmygod, this felt too damn good to call it a night after just a few hours. She envisioned him sleeping over, having sex in the morning and then going out to breakfast with her. A fantasy, yes, but one that she sensed was highly doable in light of what they were doing now. The climax that he was working her up to was no mere fantasy. She began to quiver. She was close, so close.

And then...

And then, that's when she heard her front door open. Then came a loud and familiar voice: "Hi, mom, I'm home. I want you to finally meet Emily."

She sat up. "Ohmygod! This can't be happening! Chip was supposed to stay over his dad's place."

Billy wasted no time in hopping off the bed. He was the picture of the comically clueless lover, frantic, with his arms crossed against his chest. "What should I do?"

Sherri felt dizzy, almost to the point of passing out. She sat on the edge of the bed, put her hand to her forehead, struggling to gain control. Finally, she managed to grab a robe from her closet. Then she said, "Just stay here. And it might be a good idea to put your clothes back on."

Louder this time, she again heard her son's voice: "MOM, ARE YOU HERE?"

"YES, BE DOWN IN A SEC. JUST STAY THERE, I'M COMING." Under her breath, she said, "Or I WAS cuming."

She stepped into her slippers, ducked into the adjacent bathroom and checked herself in the mirror over the sink. Her hair was disheveled, her face flushed, her pussy still on fire. She splashed her face with cold water and primped her hair. She whispered, "Jesus, how am I ever going to handle this?"

Billy was nearly dressed when she came back out. "Shhh, be as quiet as you can," she pleaded, placing a finger over her mouth. Then she left the room and walked downstairs to find Chip and Emily standing by the door.

"Mom, were you sleeping?" Chip asked.

"Um, well, sort of. Just dozing off." She stepped forward and extended her hand. "Emily, so nice to finally meet you." Sherri gave Emily a quick once-over, from her long brown hair to her platform shoes that she wore with jeans. She and Chip were about the same height, around five-eight.

"Nice meeting YOU," Emily said, all smiles. "Hope we didn't wake you."

Sherri waved it off. "Not at all. So what did you kids have planned for tonight?"

"We hope to catch the late show for Annie Hall," Chip revealed. "People that I know who've seen it said it's the best comedy they've ever seen."

"So I've heard," Sherri said. "It got great reviews. Hope to see it myself."

Chip glanced at his watch. "We've got about an hour before the movie starts. Maybe we can hang out here until it's time to leave?"

Sherri could have crapped in her panties. That is, if she was wearing panties. All she had on, save her slippers, was her long, pink robe, wrapped tightly around her body.

"Hang around here...well, um, ah, sure, I guess so. You can go in the den and watch TV, and I'll get you something. Something to drink, perhaps."

Chip narrowed his brown eyes. "Mom, are you okay? You seem a little...nervous. Hope it's not because Emily's here." He looked at his girlfriend and laughed. Emily drew a cautious smile.

"Yep, that's it," Sherri said, punching a fist into the air and forcing herself to chuckle. She looked at Emily. "Just kidding, honey."

After a few moments of uneasy silence, Chip said he was going to use the bathroom.

Sherri stepped back. "Ah, you mean the main bathroom, right?"

"Yeah, the main bathroom," Chip said. Warily, he looked at his mom, thinking that maybe she thought he said something wrong. "I seldom use your bathroom." Pause. "Mom, you sure there's nothing wrong?"

There won't be so long as Billy stays in my bedroom, she thought, struggling with the stress of hiding a potential disaster. "Well, look, Emily, let me show you to the den," she said.

While showing Emily into the den, Sherri turned her head, watching Chip head up the stairs. Her stomach churned and her face formed a picture of dread. She then went into the kitchen to fetch Emily a glass of iced tea, while listening carefully to what was going on upstairs. Her bedroom was a few steps down the hall from the main bathroom and also around a slight bend. If Billy kept quiet, Chip wouldn't hear or see him. She let out a deep sigh of relief when she heard the toilet flush and Chip coming down the stairs. Then she went into the den to give Emily her drink. "Just relax. I'm going to get some clothes on and then join you two."

With that, she went up to her room to find Billy sitting on the edge of the bed, fully clothed. She let out a soft "Whew!," brushing her arm across her forehead. "So far, so good," she whispered. "They'll be leaving in less than an hour."

Also whispering, he said, "And until then?"

"Until then, I'll be joining them in the den. The idea is to keep them in that room until they leave. Can you sit tight for another half-hour or so?"

"I guess I have no choice. You sure he's sleeping over his dad's?"

"That was his plan," she said, rummaging through her dresser for underwear. "Let's hope he sticks to it." Slipping on a pair of red panties, she ran a finger over her pussy. "Geeze, Billy, I'm still wet."

He grinned, giving her a thumbs-up. "Hope you can stay that way."

Hurriedly, she threw on a pair of old gray slacks and a blouse. Then she quick-stepped down the stairs, through the living room and into the den. Chip and Emily were on the sofa, watching the Rockford Files. "Chip, can I get you anything to drink also?"

"No thanks, mom." When Sherri took a seat into a tan wicker chair, Chip asked if she had purchased any exercise equipment yet.

"As a matter of fact, yes," she said. "I went to Sy Glass and got that ab wheel and a few dumbbells. Haven't used them yet, but I plan to real soon." Should she tell him whom she saw in the store? Well, why not? "Coincidentally, your friend Billy Shane was there at the same time."

"Really? Buying lacrosse balls, I bet."

"Yes."

"By the way, Emily runs track at Towson State."

"Middle distance and cross-country," Emily revealed.

"Not surprised," Sherri said, looking at the slim, athletic-looking girl, her long, brown hair tied in a leather barrette. "Chip always did go for girls active in sports."

"This girl could run me into the ground," Chip said.

They all laughed. Then Chip asked, "So mom, where do you keep the dumbbells?"

"Where? Right now they're in my room, but I plan to move them--″

"Can I take a look at them?"

A nervous chill shot through her. Her stomach fluttered. And that feeling that she had to crap returned. She needed a fast exit from this one. "Um, they're in my closet under a bunch of stuff. How about another, more convenient time?"

Taken aback, Chip said, "Mom, I just want to see what kind you bought. I can move the stuff if it's too much trouble. No problem."

Sherri could feel beads of sweat forming on her forehead. "Chip, dumbbells are dumbbells. If you've seen one, you've seen them all."

Chip traded furtive looks with Emily, doing an eyeroll of incredulity. "Mom, not to start something, but you've been acting very strange since we walked in here. What's going on?"

She slid to the edge of the chair, rubbing her hands together. "Nothing's going on, damn it. Like I said, it's just not a convenient time." She took a deep breath, then looked at Emily. "Sorry, Emily, maybe Chip's right. Maybe I'm a little out of sorts tonight."

"I'll say," Chip said.

Emily drew a relaxed smile of empathy. "I understand, Mrs. Klein. I've been there myself."

Then, from upstairs, came a noise, like those proverbial things that go bump in the night.

Chip looked up. "What the hell was that? Did something fall upstairs?"

Sherri felt ready to explode. Didn't she tell Billy not to make a sound? What the hell was he doing up there? She dragged a hand across her sweaty forehead. She could scream. Instead, she forced herself to chuckle. "Guess it was one of the dumbbells."

Emily tittered, hand over her mouth.

Chip didn't crack a smile. "Yeah, I guess it tripped over itself. Sounds like you got the iron kind instead of the neoprene."

"Yes, from York. You've seen York weights before, so why--"

Chip got up from the sofa. "Mom, is there someone upstairs?"

Sherri's nerves were just about shot. She felt she was stuck in a maze from which there was no escape, no way out. She looked down, didn't answer when Chip asked, "There is, isn't there?"

Emily stood up, looked at Sherri sympathetically. Then, addressing Chip, she said, "Look, Chip, maybe it's time we go and let your mom deal with whatever's going on."

Sherri sensed that Emily said this in order to leave an uncomfortable mom-son situation of which she wanted no part. Still, she looked at Emily with a relaxed smile of gratitude.

Chip relaxed his shoulders. Then, lowering his voice, he said, "Mom, you know I would never interfere with your private life. I just don't know why you seem to be hiding someone from us. I've met guys you've dated before, if that's who you're hiding. What's the big deal?" He shook his head. "This is beyond weird."

Emily took his hand. Then, with a nervy edge to her voice, she said, "Chip, we've got a movie to catch. Can we go now? Please."

At this moment, Sherri thought seriously of telling all. She knew Chip would keep pestering her until she broke. She understood. After all, he lived here, too. She could lie, tell him some ridiculous tale that her new boyfriend was shy. Or she could tell him the truth. Or at least bend the truth. She could say that Billy Shane had come over to try out her new dumbbells. She already admitted seeing him in Sy Glass Sporting Goods. Yeah, that's it. Chip should buy that one. Hook, line and sinker. Sure he would.

Still on the edge of her chair, she began to laugh. Easy at first. Then she got hysterical. She doubled over, holding one hand over her stomach, the other on the armrest for support. Anxious as she was, she realized what an absurdly comical situation this was turning out to be. Something out of a British bedroom farce. It felt good, felt so good to release all that tension. It was better than crying. Seeing Chip and Emily's expressions, a mix of concern and cluelessness, made her laugh harder. They had to think she was cracking up.

"Well ah, look, mom, we better get going," Chip said, a wane, cautious smile creasing his thin lips. "Are you going to be okay?"

"Hahaaaaaaa..." Sherri was laughing so hard she had tears in her eyes. So hard she couldn't answer right away. Gradually, it trailed off and she was able to stand up and talk. "Whew, I needed that." She wiped her eyes. "Look, I'll be fine. You kids just go and enjoy the movie."

Sherri put a hand on each of their shoulders to walk them, nearly pushing them, out of the den and into the living room.

"We'll talk later," Chip said on his way out the door.

"Right," Sherri said.

Once they were gone, she leaned her back against the front door, placed a hand over her chest and blew out a huge breath. What just happened felt like the longest half-hour she had ever experienced.

She looked up to see Billy coming down the stairs and then into the living room. "Damn, that was close!" he cried.

"You're telling me. What was that sound we heard?"

"I got up from the bed and accidentally kicked one of the dumbbells. Sorry, I couldn't sit still any longer. Then I tiptoed down the hall and stood at the landing to hear what was going on. When Chip said something about you hiding a guy upstairs, I just about lost it. Then, when I heard you laughing your head off, I thought seriously of coming down to tell them that I was over here to show you dumbbell exercises."

That lame explanation got Sherri going again. "Hahahaaaaaa..." She doubled over, watching Billy standing there, hands stuffed into his pockets, wearing a blank expression.

"I'm serious."

She nodded, holding her sides. "I know you are, Billy, I know you are. That's why I'm laughing so hard."

Finally, Billy began to laugh, too.

*****

"I think my mom's got a secret lover," Chip said to Billy as they were coming off Gilman's parking lot, walking toward the playing field.

Billy struggled to hold it together. "Really? What makes you think that?"

Chip proceeded to tell him what happened when he took Emily over to meet Sherri. "I still don't know who it is. For some reason, she won't tell me. But I aim to find out."

Billy turned his head, stifling laughter. He and Sherri had not picked up where they left off after the intrusion. After that, they just couldn't get serious again. But they did make tentative plans to meet again. The mutual attraction was too strong to ignore.

Just a few yards apart, the two lacrosse players, suited-up with sticks in hand, began to toss the ball back and forth.

"So how are you going to find out?" Billy asked.

"Not sure. But her keeping it a secret tells me that this guy, whoever the fuck he is, isn't someone she'd normally go for."

"Maybe it's Deep Throat."

Chip didn't laugh. "May-bee. She's acting more secretive than Nixon during Watergate."

"So why do you say it's not someone she'd normally go for?"

"Because she's acting ashamed on some level for some reason. She had no problem with me meeting guys she's gone out with before. Weird."

"Sounds very weird," Billy said. "Well, what can you do, hire a private detective?"

"Maybe bug the place, I don't know," Chip said. "When you saw her in Sy Glass, did she seem okay to you? I mean, did anything seem off?"

"Not at all. Anyway, I'd be the last person she'd talk to about her love life."

Chip chuckled. "Yeah, that's true. Well, maybe this guy has some physical deformity. Or maybe he's a Mafia hit man or something. Just kidding, my mom isn't that desperate. Look, I don't know, but it seems to me that there's something shady going on with her and this character."

Something shady. Well put, Billy thought. Because the guy you're now playing catch with, your lacrosse practice buddy, neighbor and good friend, is the guy you're looking for. And if he's not careful, you just might find him.