Spellman Ch. 25

She squeezed my hand, collecting herself. "His name was Liam. We met at the hospital. He was a doctor. Again, I know it's a cliché, but it was just like my parents, and I really liked that symmetry. He pursued me, and I let myself be caught, after putting up a token resistance. We dated for a several months, and he was frustrated with my commitment to keep myself chaste, but over time he wore me down bit by bit. It was only after my mom died that I finally let him go all the way, though. In hindsight, I can see that I let him take advantage of my grief, but there's nothing I can really do about that now. Dad had been diagnosed before Mom died, but once she was gone his condition started to decline pretty rapidly. We all talked as a family, and we decided that I was going to move out here to help take care of him."

Cece rubbed her eyes, which were starting to shine with tears. "I thought that Liam and I were on the way to getting married. I knew he couldn't drop everything and follow me out here, but I thought that he would understand the situation, and that we could handle a long-distance relationship while I was taking care of my dad. But as soon as I told him I was going to move to San Diego, he decided we were done. Apparently, I wasn't worth waiting for. He'd 'spent months getting me to stop being such a prude and give it up,' and he wasn't going to put up with a long-distance relationship for some indeterminate amount of time. It was more important to him that he had someone to have sex with, anyone at all, than it was for that person to be me."

She started to cry, and I pulled her into my arms. It only took a minute or so for her to regain her composure. "Sorry about that," she said, wiping her eyes.

"Nothing to apologize for," I told her. "I get it." I squeezed her gently, and she leaned more into my hug.

"Anyways, long story short. I guess the whole thing has made me a little guarded about opening myself up to someone like that again. Like I said, the cat's already out of the bag. I'm not saying that we need to get married, or engaged, or anything like that before we can have sex, but I am saying that it might...it might take me a little bit longer to feel comfortable with that than you want. I don't want to lead you on or anything. I understand if you were expecting that we'd sleep together once we were a couple, and that me not being ready for it right away might be a problem."

I took a few moments to consider my words, but I kept holding her in my arms. "I won't lie," I said, "I was definitely hoping that we'd end up in bed together. Maybe not today, but soon. I do think sex is important in a relationship, and you know how attractive I find you."

She laughed and nodded, rubbing her cheek against my chest. "You haven't exactly been subtle about checking me out," she said.

"I make no apologies for it. Look, Cece, I do want to sleep with you. I might feel a little...frustrated if things aren't moving forward physically as quickly as I'd like, but it's not the end of the world. I'm not asking you to be my girlfriend just because I want to sleep with you, even though I definitely do. I'm asking because I like you, I like spending time with you, I like going on dates with you, and because I want to do even more couple-y stuff with you. Of course, I hope that it won't be too long before you feel comfortable with me sexually, but I'm willing to wait it out, because I am more interested in you as a whole person than I am in you just as someone to have sex with."

Cece grabbed my face and kissed me, hard. "Thank you," she said, once our lips finally parted.

"You're welcome."

She swung her leg over and straddled me. "So, boyfriend, how about we do some serious kissing for a bit before you take me back home?"

I smiled. "I'd like that very much, girlfriend."

"You can keep your hands on my butt. I can tell you really like it."

"Oh, god," I said, "you have no idea. It's incredible."

She giggled and said, "I think I have some idea." Then she kissed me.

We made out for a while, and I took full advantage of her invitation to grope her ass. I felt like I was in heaven. Sure, I'd like to take things further, but I couldn't complain too much. The Glorious Goddess of Glutes was my Girlfriend. She had graduated from Miss Triple G to Miss Quadruple G, and that last G was by far the most important.

When I dropped her off back at her house, I walked her to the door instead of simply letting her get out of the car. "You should come over for dinner sometime this week," she said. "Maybe before the dance class on Tuesday? Now that you're officially my boyfriend, you should probably meet Dad."

"Wow, that sounds like a lot of pressure," I said, only half-joking. It did kind of sound like a lot of pressure.

"You'll be fine. He's a big softie."

"Sure, that would be nice. I'd love to have dinner and meet your dad."

Cece beamed. "Excellent. Thank you for a wonderful afternoon, Ryan."

"No, thank you."

"What are you up to this evening?" she asked.

"I'm going to go to the Padres game," I told her.

"Cool, that sounds like fun. With Paul?"

"No, actually. With Melissa. You remember her from the other game, right? Short, blonde?"

"Oh. Yeah." I could immediately tell she didn't seem too happy about that.

"You don't have anything to worry about, Cece. I'm serious about us being a couple. Melissa is a big baseball fan, and we're just friends and coworkers."

She nodded. "Yeah, sorry. It's fine. It was just a surprise. Not exactly what I was expecting right after we became official. I trust you, though."

"We've been planning to go since earlier this week."

"Seriously, it's fine," she said. "Like I said, just a moment of surprise. Have fun. What time is the game?"

"It's at 5:30, I think. Should be done around nine or so. I'll text you when I'm back at my apartment."

"You don't have to do that. I'm not going to be some crazy, jealous, controlling girlfriend. I promise."

"I know, but I'm going to text you anyways, just because I'd like to check in with my new girlfriend before I go to sleep. Okay?"

"Sure, that sounds great," she said, smiling again. "Seriously, have fun. I'm sorry for my little moment there."

"Nothing to apologize for. Enjoy the rest of your day. I'll text you when I'm home, okay?"

"Okay." She kissed me. "Later, boyfriend."

Melissa picked me up for the game a bit before five. I had changed into a pair of jeans and my Chase Headley jersey. She was wearing jeans, a "Lake Grove High School Softball" t-shirt and an Oregon Ducks hat.

I knew I needed to talk to Melissa about me going exclusive with Cece, but I wasn't sure how she would take it. Hopefully she would understand—it wasn't like this would be coming completely out of nowhere—but it still had the potential to ruin the fun of the evening. I wanted Melissa and I to still be able to hang out and do stuff like this as friends.

"Do you seriously still fit in your clothes from high school?" I asked her once we were on the way to the game.

"Of course I do. I stopped growing when I was like fifteen. As long as I don't get fat I should be able to wear this thing forever."

"When was the last time you actually got to play softball?"

"This spring, in a rec league. Becca's husband, Mike, had a team for his work and they needed another girl, so they brought me in as a ringer," she said, winking.

"That sounds like fun. I wouldn't mind playing some beer league softball."

"You should! Maybe we can find enough people to do our own team," Melissa said, practically bouncing in her seat with excitement as she drove.

Traffic getting to the the park was a bit of a nightmare, but we made it to our seats just before the first pitch. The Padres were playing the Mets, and had already dropped the first two games of the series. The Mets batters went down in order to start the game, and then the Padres managed to get a run across in the bottom of the first.

Watching the game with Melissa was a ton of fun. She obviously knew baseball, even if the Padres weren't her team, and peppered our conversation with a ton of interesting stats from the season that even I didn't know.

"Did you see that curveball?" she said, practically punching me in the arm to get my attention. "Incredible control."

"I saw the pitch, but I couldn't tell it was a curve from here."

"Stick with me, kid, and maybe you'll learn a thing or two." She laughed, and I laughed right along with her.

Our conversation was light and easy. We talked about the game, baseball in general, and our respective weeks at work. I couldn't help but feel my affection for her growing even more as we spent this time together. Melissa was just a fun person to be around, and her mere presence made a fun event like a baseball game even more enjoyable.

After the Padres added another three runs in the bottom of the fourth inning, I offered to go get us some food, since Melissa had bought the tickets. "I'll take a beer and one of those big hot dogs," she said, giving me an exaggerated wink. I just chuckled and shook my head. In addition to Melissa's order, I decided to get a couple of hot dogs and a beer for myself. The line wasn't too bad, and I made it back to my seat before the Padres were up to bat again, but not before the Mets added another run to make the score 4-2 in favor of the good guys.

My phone vibrated, and I pulled it out of my pocket to read the text from Cece.

Having fun? My dad has the game on, so I'm half-watching while I make us dinner.

Yeah, it's a good game so far! Just got myself some hot dogs.

Nice. Enjoy your dogs, and the rest of the game.

I will. Text you later.

Melissa and I continued to chat as we ate our food and watched the game unfold. During the seventh inning stretch, the cameras started searching the crowd, and everyone cheered as they brought the kiss cam up on the jumbotron. I cheered along with them, until I was surprised to see myself and Melissa up on the screen. Suddenly, I regretted not talking to Melissa about Cece earlier.

I tried to shake off the camera, but the cameraman and the crowd wouldn't let me off the hook. Finally, Melissa noticed that we were on the kiss cam. She made a face at my protests and told me to knock it off. Then she grabbed my face with both hands and pulled me into a long kiss, causing the crowd the roar their approval and the kiss cam to move on to its next victims.

"What was up with that?" she asked me, once things had settled down. "I didn't think you were the shy type. It's just a kiss in front of forty-thousand people."

I felt a knot grow in the bottom of my stomach. "No, it's not that. Melissa..." I trailed off, trying to figure out how to soften the blow.

"What?" She looked confused, and then her confusion turned to concern. "No," she said, shaking her head. "No, no, no. Don't tell me."

"Melissa-"

"No!" she said again, with so much force that I almost rocked back in my seat. Tears had started to well up in her eyes. "I swear, Ryan, if you tell me that you...if you....fuck." She shook her head and took a deep breath.

"Melissa, I asked Cece if she wanted to be exclusive today. She's my girlfriend, now."

"Are you fucking kidding me?" she spat. The people in the seats around us did their best to pretend like they weren't paying attention. "Fucking fuck. How could you do this to me?"

"What do you mean, how could I do this to you? Melissa, you said you didn't want anything serious, that you weren't ready for a relationship. You knew that I was heading that way with Cece."

"I thought I had more time! You've been on what, three dates with her? Jesus. I had this whole thing planned out today, Ryan. I was going to tell you after the game that I had changed my mind, that I was ready to give it a shot with you. But of fucking course you asked her to be your girlfriend today. Just my fucking luck." Her words were angry, but the tears in her eyes told me that she was feeling hurt more than anything else.

"Melissa, I'm sorry, I didn't think-"

"No. I can't do this." She stood up from her seat and hurried up the stairs and into the concourse.

"Melissa, wait!" I called after her. I tried to follow, but she was short and disappeared easily into the crowd of people. Sighing, I slumped back against the concrete wall. Maybe she just needed to take a few minutes to herself to calm down. But five minutes turned to ten, and ten into twenty, and there was still no sign of her. I pulled out my phone to call her, but she didn't answer. I sent her a text.

Melissa, I'm sorry. Where did you go? I still need to talk to you.

But she didn't respond. I tried calling again, but this time it went straight to voicemail. The game wasn't over, but I made my way out of the stadium and into the parking lot. My fears were confirmed when I walked over to where we had parked.

"Fuck," I said to the empty parking space. She was gone, leaving me here without a ride home.

With a heavy sigh, I pulled out my phone and made another call.

"Ryan? What's up?"

"Beth, my greatest and oldest friend, please come pick me up."

She barked out a laugh. "Fine, but you're buying me dinner."