All Comments on 'Splashdown Ch. 08'

Heart wrenching! 5 stars

Again and again....reconciliation at all costs. This is just cliche driven crap.

Well, it sounds credible doesn't it?

That filled in quite a few gaps, (hers included).

So, with another three chapters to go, my prediction is that Gary will get her head back on straight as promised, and then move her to one side as he settles for a life with Kathy.

But this shouldn't take all three chapters to tell, so there's in all likelihood a surprise or two in store for us. If CL is indeed rewriting some of the story balance then that would account for the extra day delay between chapters 7 and 8. My preference would be for our author to post everything that remains so we can all get on with our 'Peggy-free' lives once again.

Bazza

Your story is becoming more and more of a cheap cuckold farce. Agency is right not to want him anymore because he really is just a weakling. However, why you need so many chapters to show us that she puts everything else above him, and he puts up with everything is beyond me. 1*! It has nothing to do with love, either from her side or from his side!

This has become just plain emotional torture for the MC at this point. Self flagellation to the extreme. It looks as they will be reconciled but trust me as someone with a psychology degree their relationship is too unbalanced to last. Their power dynamic is completely skewed and his white knight syndrome will cause her to react in one of 2 foreseen ways. 1. She will grow to resent him as his love will make her constantly feel guilty. Or 2. She will become more and more distant/disrespectful as she has proven she can behave like that and get away with it per se. Meanwhile Kathy is sitting there all loving and respectful just being kept on the shelf.

What the hell did I just read?

But I’ll be honest, I don’t understand half of it.

Him: you were raped

Her: Nope. I begged him for it

Him: No details!

Her: Here’s every last fucking detail, even details I promised you I wouldn’t give

Him: I love you, let’s move forward

Her: No, my need to hate myself trumps your need for sanity

Him: You weren’t to blame

Her: No, I was only to blame and I need to self punish and make myself miserable at your expense

Him: The only way I can love you is protect you

Her: [cries]

Him: Yay! I got what I wanted! Now, it will only take me another five chapters, (which will take approximately another calendar month of publishing) to figure out if I will dump you.

There is something to this story that is compelling, and I find myself staying up at night hoping there will be another chapter posted. When a new chapter comes in, I’ll read it and just get pissed off. I’ll co-dependent on this fucking story.

So bad its good. No point in using one word where 30 will do and no point in only exploring some event once when you can rehash it over and over . Great premise but amazingly bad execution.

TC Ireland.

Brutal. The only thing that will help is to put out a hit on Alexi. And divorce Peggy. And fuck Kathy

Gary is completely pathetic. The longer this story drags on the more I want him to be killed by either his special operations teams or better yet his own hands.

I liked some Peggy's dialogue with Gary during her confession. Would be great in a different story.

Rehash. Rehash. Rehash.

Yawn.

I keep reading ... hoping against hope that SOMETHING will actually HAPPEN.

But no, you just keep us hanging on.

This story is like one of those interminable infomercials that go on, and on, and on without ever getting to the price ... "but WAIT ... there's more" ... of the same drivel.

How about, in the next chapter, you have gutless Gary hand in his 'man card' and slink off into the sunset?

Love is so amazingly complex. Two people that love each other desperately are trying to make their way back to what once was. They won't because they can't. Too much has happened for them to be like they were. The question then becomes, what will they now become? Will they work their way back to each other or will the weight of what happened destroy their relationship?

I find it odd that so many commenters talk about him like he's some weak cuck when in fact he shows a strength few men would have. He loves his wife so much that he's in until the bitter end. If he were making the sacrifices he does because she was ill not a soul would have an issue with it. Since fidelity is the issue, the BTB crowd becomes polarized in judgement.

The ball is in her court. She's fighting her guilt and is gradually beginning to understand what her husband needs from her. I sincerely hope that they find each other again.

I've struggled with this story. I think that he spends way to much time on agonizing over every little detail while waiting for his wife to 'get it'. I nearly gave up on the series because I hated the direction it was going in but at the same time I have to see how it ends.

Sorry, she's "bragging". Despite her insistence that she needs to fully confess her actions, it's bragging.

"Dialog for me is showing not telling."

Actually dialog is telling. Action is showing. Once again this is just too wordy.

For those wondering about commenters being angry with how weak the husband is it's because he saw all of this coming from a mile away and spelled it out to Peg months prior. This wasn't a one night stand where she was drunk. Sure the details were not exact but the dude called it and told her and it happened.

And the thing that really burns me is that for the entire story it's clear Peg knows how much he loves her. It just reeks of one of those wife characters that just cheats and deals with the fallout because she knows that in the end her husband won't leave her. And she wasn't wrong. He was making up excuses for her before she even took off.

She was drugged, and begging for it, and it was rape...yeah okay it is but to be honest this little twist is a little too much to be thrown in with the quagmire we have to deal with already. This element can be made into a separate stand alone story in itself. However with it thrown into the mix it only works against her. Before she didn't even consider him by getting the shot. He voiced his concern well in advance and warned her. In space she ignored him and was holding Alexis hand. They land and all that drama happens. There's really nothing working in her favor here. Everything points to her having her fun and doing whatever she wanted and dealing with her moody husband. Remember actions speak louder than words in these situations. She does a really good job pleading that she didn't want this. But her actions at every step until the deed was done said she didn't care.

He is screwed either way. He can't have Kathy because she is a constant reminder of what he lost. With Peg and what she did, she is a constant walking remembrance of everything that did happen, and she says she can keep it from happening again and yet all of she can't even control her emotions that she is going thru right now. She hasn't done the one thing that would show him that from this point on that he is the #1 person, is to quit her career and get away from those memories. She wants to have her cake and eat it too no matter what the cost to him. He can never be back to what life was before because everything he was no longer exists. Job, personal life, intimacy. All gone. No one's mind can separate all of that and not think about it when with the other person unless they sacrifice what was important to them as a counterbalance. So if you make Kathy as his alternative then you go against the personality you created for this character.

1* Mud writing. Please stop!

Really convoluted thought processes by all the characters at this point. As much as I loathe myself for sticking with this psycho thriller, here I am. UGH! 3*

I finally figured out what the problem is with this story, it came to me as I smacked my head on my desk because I fell asleep.

Gary, Peggy never wanted to have an affair, tryst, dalliance whatever the hell you call it. She'll never go near one again! Kathy couldn’t guarantee that.

You can stand to not work for a little while. You've shown me your day trading, you have a little money in the bank. Shit, the guy had already lost a year, how much more did he need to lose?

You can try, I mean really try life with me, as Peg would take you back in a heartbeat if you then decide she's the winner. We could live together for a while; hell Peg owes you a year. That's all you would have to say ... to either of us. And we are to believe that Peggy would be celibate the whole time.

For the first three months up there I was fine, then well, anything sexual got keener. I was up there with three guys. CL, next time you write a story about the ISS, you may like to know, there is never less than seven people there at any one time.

NASA investigators found strange payments to one of our doctors. My doctor. I guess I'm an official case file now. So what happened to him?

Okay Gary, I-I think this will be the worst for you. No, the worst was it took a whole page to finally say it.

Better chapter. Some real dialogue between Gary and Peg, finally. Shouldn't have taken 8 chapters to get here.

Hi ChoppedLiver,

I think BIGGUY summed up the show and tell distinction. Yes dialogue can move things forward by showing us important aspects of human desires and behavior. And you do this in this story—with the occasional “Freudian Slip” that Gary picks up on. But, and for me this is a big but, it is wrapped in so much repetitious verbiage that it makes it hard to want to stick through the word salad to find those gems that advance the story. I get that you are imitating life where people rehash things over and over, adding layers to the pearl. I know that what you understand yourself to be doing is “peeling away onion layers” but that is not my experience of your story. Why? Gary outlined the trajectory of the story early on. Peggy’s unwillingness to give up her first love even after desire for it has badly wounded both her and her husband tell us that their relationship is doomed unless there is some humungous revelation yet to be announced and not yet hinted at, or some Deus ex Machina, or both. So, the only interest is whether our protagonist’s inability to say/face this is an affectation of the author’s unwillingness to delve into Gary’s brain (ruin the suspense) or Gary’s unwillingness to face the truth. In some sense, Gary is an unreliable narrator. I think some readers’ frustration is due to their ability to connect dots that Gary cannot; for example—the guy is DEPRESSED! Clinically so, and who wouldn’t be in his situation! All the hits and no way to express his anger outwards, it all goes inwards, against himself. If one learns to be helpless, as Gary has done, self-deception may be the only out. He is alone, in inner space… in his own space capsule, orbiting planet Peagy. He has no one he can trust. Sorry, Kathy ain’t it. She may TELL him she can be trusted, and she can keep her libido in semi-check, but she constantly probes his defenses for weaknesses because she “knows”—instinctually—what is good for him. She recognizes his depression but doesn’t name it. Why? I’ll pass on that. Giving her information is an opportunity for her to use it. All in the name of helping him. The whispering in the ear, ther estatements of her interests—that is SHOWING.

So, he is alone.

Quick add—anger and resentment from Gary. This is a form of hatred. Saint Gary could show us this complexity of emotion in dealing with Peggy.. whom he also loves with deep fidelity, of course

Couldnt read this ch, skimmed it. Ive come to loath saint Gary, F me hez an over analytical wuss. Dont care for her at this point either. Divorce and become the NASA crew concubine

There was Aladdin who had to rub the magic lamp 3 times and we have Saint Gary who has to repeat and rehash the same things 3 times.

Damn it's magic!

Result: instead of a geni_us, we have stupid readers.🤣

Thanks for Peg's side of things. I'm rooting for Peggy. I think Kathy is

manipulating him for her selfish desires.

You have made plain the depth of Peg's

love and regret for her actions. She truly

loves Gary and would be devoted to him. Gary though over thinks everything

and this is trouble. Anxious to see how it

all plays out.

That is it

I have had too much

Good Bye

Yup as many of you, I read the latest chapter. I could not get through much of the psycho babble that occurred when Peggy and Gary slung low hanging fruit back and forth beetween each other. Who in the world would dissect all of this into snippets of nonsense. The meaningless detail expressed in this chapter is mind numbing. Whatever is expessed by either of them to each other is immediately refuted and twisted in a different direction. Come on now, enough is enough. As I have said in previous comments on this slow agonizing story, the progression is a psychological analysis of a relationship that is stuck in quick sand. Their marriage is irreparably damaged and the third charter Kathy is no help. At his point, after the reunion of Peggy and Gary the only thing that makes any sense is for both of them to fall into each others arms and have mind boggling sex. Gary has a terminal case of blue balls, and Peggy has hormone overload dripping out of her cunt. Come on get on with it and stop this pussy footing around while they talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk.

Five pages of treading water that didn't advance the storyline at all.

At this point I feel like Gary continuing to try to forgive Peg, shield her, support her and even trying to take some of the blame for her is what's keeping their relationship status in a holding pattern.

For all the mistakes Peg has made in this chapter she's trying to take the responsibility and blame for everything. And Gary won't let her. At some point when someone is trying to make a sacrifice for something they believe very strongly in you have to let them for their mental well being.

god...please stop! i prefer the Kgb slow torture to this crap!

Really only one word for Gary to speak

“Goodbye.”

~Spiny

Hopefully the Russians put a hit out on Gary and puts him out of his misery.

Yawn.........

Goes on and on and on about what she has to tell him and then goes on and on about what she has to tell him but just doesn't get around to actually telling him because the author lacks the ability to stop grandstanding about his 'superior' insights to the human condition. His sheer weight of verbiage has made an excellent plot into an unworkable, repetitious pile of crap.

Author is obviously a self flagellating cuckold and living vicariously through the eyes of his avatar - his self abusing weak MC. The repetitions are the author reliving the thrills of his left? hand as he types with his right. Just a mass of self indulgent masturbatory fantasies moving inexorably towards a huge waste of time in many lives.

Dialogue should be showing and not telling... when you do it right. Your dialogue is not how it's done right. You basically have narration between quotation marks. Characters spouting off for paragraph after paragraph with little to no interruption is not dialogue. It's a speech. You're writing a series of speeches, and wondering why people are fed up with it.

As it was said from the first chapters, this is just a cheating/cuck story dressed with a totally unbelievable space adventure plot. About 90% of the story has been spent for the endless psycho-dialogues, trying to legitimate the cheating/cuckolding events and making them totally acceptable, with weak excuses (double cheating, rape drugs in a billion funded international space mission). There is no love in this story, no romance, just selfishness, immature behaviour and endless stupidity of the main characters. The unique believable character is the narcissistic b1tch-wife, she willingly did whatever she needed, just for her enjoyment making her husband, publicly to the world, the most stupid cuck shadow of a man. The only totally unbelievable character of the story is this so called man of honour, this so called tough super-agent kickass guy, the do-nothing cuck-husband. He is just a pathetic cartoonish ridiculous unbelievable character, but don't call him a man.

Why not poste the last chapter and we are done with this shit?

Drawn out and many redundant dialogues

Raped by the Russians? Cheating skank slut loves only herself and what she wants and he is the most imbecilic man to ever walk the planet. Too bad a meteor didn't hit the space station and fry her lying whore ass. Wish he'd just put a gun to his head and end everyone's misery who listens to his sissy wimp dribble.

Reading this is like sitting in your favorite restaurant getting ready to eat a stack of pancakes when the waitress comes over and dumps a 5 gallon bucket of syrup on them. The only way to get to the pancakes is to fight through all that sickly sweet goo until you wonder if it’s worth the effort. Peat and repeat ad infinitem.

Each chapter that score dips a little more. Will it stay above 2* by chapter 11??????

As painstakingly tedious as this was, sometimes in real life discussions go like this when you get to the nitty gritty of whether or not to stay together. I’ve given criticism before, but I will not fault on this chapter no matter what comments others have. 5 stars

Ugh, this story is way too long. He _is_ weak, he should have separated from her and started divorcing her as soon as she made her decision. He was forewarned, prescient even, about what would happen. Yet he stuck with her anyway. There is no reason for this story to be as long as it is, so many pages of zero plot movement. Inevitable RAAC coming soon.

The husband was weak, not loving. Those who say he "loved her" so much to stand by her through all this is delusional. He had blinders on and was never seeing the real woman. She never loved him. She was a self centered woman who only thought of herself and her wants. Love is thinking of each other ALL the time and making decisions together, especially when the decisions change the marriage.

This author either wanted to write a confrontational story, like February Sucks, or needs to seek professional help. There seems to be too much dialog of getting the husband to accept what the wife was doing as acceptable behavior.

Trust me, There was video made. Russan likes to blackmail.

Honestly. Just stop. Be done with this. It's not worth your time to keep writing it and it sure as hell isn't worth our time to read it.

Why the fucking hell would this cuck want to spend another minute with this insane narcissistic sociopath?

.

And why fucking hell has it gotten to this point and Mr Special Ops Planner has YET to get into NASA’s face about all of this shit?

.

All of the “after the fact” explanations for how and why Pegs wound up in Russian hands was pathetically weak tea. Absolute bullshit.

.

This tale is fatally burdened by incoherent plot details — especially EVERYTHING related to the actual space launch and execution and recovery — and two main characters that are totally unlikable: a narcissistic bitch who claims to “love” her husband but REPEATEDLY does things that prove otherwise…..and a husband whose inner CUCK seems to be stronger that the Star Wars “Force”.

.

The only reason to continue to read this crap is to HOPE that the cuck finally finally finally comes to his senses and dumps the bitch. Anything else will consign this rambling incoherent mess to the LW graveyard of cuck hall of fame contributions.

.

1 *

So at least one NASA doctor was in on the conspiracy to ruin the MC life over some unknown operation that he was part of that the Russians wanted payback. Is mister badass MC going at least ruin the NASA doctors life? Or does the MC do nothing to the people who set it up to ruin his life. I mean he has lost his job and his wife, yet even with a logical stating point (NASA doctor) the MC seems to be doing nothing behind the scenes, why is that?

I now believe that he is mentally ill. No other reason he is putting himself through this hell. There us no way back from this, just move on.

Gary- "Kath, you must see that I've tried ..... it hasn't worked, all those awful talks where she dredges up detail after detail... I was wise not wanting details."

Direct quote from the story, with a little editing. Showing that the writer herself MUST have some idea of how this is so frustrating for the readers. There's some real writing talent here, has to be, or there wouldn't be any readers left.

This is getting just God awful now. Don't know how you can make it any worst but I have complete faith in you doing it.

Can I request a Wake-up Call?

Gary is an absolute asshole. He doesn’t deserve Peg. She should leave him.

His holier than thou attitude is ridiculous. Just stupid. And he wouldn’t lose anything from “the agency.” She was drugged and raped. They would take action against the Russians not Gary.

And lastly. Peggy has done NOTHING wrong of her own volition. She was manipulated and pushed by a rogue doctor at NASA. Gary treated her like crap before the mission and she responded. What would one expect? And she would be getting so much NASA psych counseling after the mission that she would not be in this alone with Gary like this story portrays. So she loved her mission more than Gary? That is true of about 95% of people. There is nothing wrong with that. The couple has to love each other enough to understand and overcome. It is clear Gary loves his job more than Peg. It’s the same thing. The difference which falls on Peggy’s side is that hers was temporary and on,y happens very occasionally but Gary’s is full time all the time.

Crappy story told in a crappy way with too many asshats reading it. To those who keep claiming she had an affair she didn’t. She was fucking drugged and raped. That is NOT on her. Way to have sympathy for the victim guys. She is the victim here not Gary.

"Dialog for me is showing not telling."

Except your dialogue is less about characterization, and the showing of internal "actions" and is primarily exposition. Exposition of both the plot and the emotions.

Their actions and feelings are mediated to us through that expository dialogue and makes it artificial and a step distanced.

I can't understand why you can waste so much time writing this kind of bullshit? 8 chapters to describe how a wimp married to a slut becomes a cuckold is a waste of time for you and for us! 1* is too high for this crap!

Soooo? What happened to the Superman cape wearing tough guy Gary from the early chapters that was going to kick ass and take names?? The NASA doctor that fucked up Peggy must have secretly neutered Gary also.

Everything here points to Gary being the world's largest ticking nuclear time bomb.

At every single turn of events, Gary has taken a hit to the chin. Gary has endured the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune as it were. Peggy has dumped on him more times than a malevolent universe has the right to. The russians dumped on him for specific reasons yet unknown. Alexi dumped on him as one man doing another man wrong in the most despicable way possible. The doctor who took cash for compromising Peggy and the mission dumped on him...for mere money. NASA dumped on him with lousy protocols and for not having better protection against russian interference. Peggy returns to earth and NOBODY from NASA is there to take control of THEIR OWN ASTRONAUT!!! Your kidding me? That is beyond belief! Gary's own agency dumps on him effectively retiring him for reasons totally outside the realm of his own control. Kathy has dumped on him as a counselor with her passive aggressive siren's seduction and whispering infidelity into his ears knowing his struggles with his internal fears and demons.

Gary has been rendered neuter and mute, through NO fault of his own. No matter the high level integrity an individual may have, in high winds the skinny weak reed bends but the mighty oak breaks! Gary is on the brink, Chernobyl and Fukushima rolled into one, and when he blows it should only be to the degree that he makes the Tsar Bomba look like a fire cracker! Choppedliver, you owe him!

You and Kamala Harris have a lot in common

A little story about a cheating wife and a cuck husband. They have a really good job, well paid and with high level of responsibility. One day her multinational corporation decide to send her in Russia to activate a new entreprise subsidiary. She will be helped by three russian professionals, all males and she would have to stay over there for about six months. She is very excited, since this is a really good occasion for her professional career but her husband is just a bit doubtful and worried. She tells her husband "no need to be worried, it's all going to be good, please don't be a baby". She will have to live in an hotel suite near the subsidiary and to better reinforce the international collaboration with her three russian colleagues, she will have to share that same suite with them. So hubby and wifey talk about the little chance for her to cheat, but in the end both of them agree that even then, it would be acceptable for her career enhancement. For six months the wife almost don't call her husband and in one rare occasion, in a video meeting she shows intimate behaviour with her russian colleagues, but "no need to worry, it's all going to be good". After six months she come back and confesses to her husband her multiple cheating, red hot raw sex always without protection, but no need to worry, she is not pregnant, yet. Besides she remind very well that she enjoyed all the sexual experiences, but it was not her fault at all, since maybe the three colleagues made her drink too much every after dinner. So, what will the loving husband do ? But nothing of course, since he loves his wife, he is always ready to support her, even to raise her bastard children if something should go wrong. What's the moral in this half page story ? That cheating for a wife is absolutely acceptable and even more for a husband to be publicly cuckolded, since the real love means just that. But ... what about more chapters just to repeat that this is all good ?

If you don’t finish in the next chapter with HELL breaking loose on all those concerned with the conspiracy, I’m done.

Self respect--there is none.

Just another round of gobblelty gook. It's amazing how the mc went from He'll have their asses to Just being sooooo understanding and having more and more shit piled on him. Lots of inconsistencies with the characters. But the main thing remains is you can use 5 pages to say 1 page worth of story.

Chopped, thank you again. I'm hooked on the story and wondering where it will take us. I just hope that it's going to take us to a place where Gary shows us why and how he managed to keep it together, and Peg shows us her true character. (Based on the author's notes, I'm not sure we see the true Peggy through her words.)

I still enjoy this story, and I hope you see some of the issues with it. I look for ward to the last two parts and then your further works . Please listen and learn from some of the excellent suggestions given in the comments and ignore the ones that are nothing more than hate.

I think this will be the only review of this story that I will do, I have read a good part of the chapters and yes, I must admit that like several of the readers who have expressed their opinion, I have done so by skipping large portions of them. That even those who have given a positive review or opinion, tell us that it is indeed a defect in the story, rather than an excuse to attack it.

"Dialog for me is showing not telling..." I think that this one of the two main problems with this story, in your note youre basically admiting that not only you choose to show things by only talking between the characters rather trough several scenes by each chapter, causing many of the readers to complain about the constant repetition of themes, development of the plot and twists in it, which in many cases were tremendously predictable from several chapters.

And then you droping this little gem "People say what they mean... or what they want you to think. but they are often saying something other than they think they are... At least in this little drama they haven't figured it out yet themselves" you're basically telling us that all the characters are unreliable storytellers and it's setting the stage for some sort of Deux in Machina.

The second problem its repetition, the premise had potential the equal mix of espionage, classic melodrama, a dash of political intrigue, elements that caught the attention of many readers. Then you squandered, after beating the same dead horse for 6 of the 8 chapters and then, Peggy its back in home, and rather that show us... you just tell, in long, tedius, wordy and repetitive way... for several chapters, adding only some other detail that only serves to torture one of the protagonists.

I always say that a RAAC, it's the hardest kind of story to get right, this story proves it. Don't get me wrong, I think that Chopped's work deserves to be recognized, he/she/? has dedicated a good part of his/her/? time to writing this story and it is clearly its something that is passionate about, however it is still a RAAC, one of the bunch, it lacks its own personality , its premise has been wasted since chapter 2, it falls into the same clichés of the genre, unlikable characters, to many plotholes that broke the suspension of disbelief and the plot twists have been so poorly executed them, in a slow and predictable way.

I'm not a fan of BTB stories, but if I believe in stories where there is such a malicious collusion to harm the main characters, there must be a retribution, one that goes beyond a simple pat on the hands or butt. I find it difficult for even that to happen here. After all, its the story tha chopped choose to writte.

Ok rant over.

Dialog can be showing or telling. It's not who said it, but what is said. Putting the narrator's words in quotes and having one character tell it to another is still telling. Writing out the scene he told about, whether it contains dialog or not, is showing.

As to which you did, I have no clue. I'm barely skimming it to see if you finally have an epiphany and take this crap down for a rewrite. I'm not saying the plot is great, but you could trim away probably 85% of the words and create something readable.

I just hate this story, I don’t understand it, it feels like a repetitive conversation. Three more chapters and I don’t think it will get better. We’ll see, at this point I’ll take 11 more February sucks stories I’ve this one

Your story has covered what 9 or 10 months and Billy Badass ie Gary has done absolutely nothing to find out who fucked with him and Peggy much less do anything to them. And why is that??? The Gary you portray now isn't remotely like what you made him out to be at the start of the story. Also you can defend the dialog in the story all you want but there is way, way too much. And must of it is not how normal people would talk.

ffs

Much too long. Only way to save Gary - dump the wife, screw Kathy, send an outline of what happened to The NY Times to embarrass the Russians, NASA and his agency employer, then find a way neuter Alexi as painfully as possible and kill the other 2 Russians. . Oh yes, build our own space station.

Her explanation seems to ignore her holding hands with the Russian Cosmonaut after the space walk

He better get some whoop ass on NASA, Alexi and the Russians before this story is over.

First two chapters hooked me but the rest is just a mediocre soap opera, sorry but I'm done

You could have said in one sentence that Gary is one of the world's greatest cuckolds. He would do and take anything to make his wife happy, even in detriment of his sanity, sexuality and professional life. All in the name of a love that has been only in words reciprocated. I can only guess, you fell in love with your own written words and that love like the extend of your work keeps growing and growing in duration like "Coronation Street", reputedly the longest soap opera ever. Thanks for generating for us so many words held together by unrequited "LOVE".

Boy easy to see that feminists like "Mbgdallas" can turn a turd of sh--, into a silver platter. Sorry, your heroin is just another selfish, narcissist slut, selling a "painted love" like it were pristine water. Who are trying to fool?

Just some simple questions. If she was raped in space, why in 6 months she didn't say nothing to anyone ? The communications were working perfectly everyday, so ? If she was so horny, is it really credible that in 6 months she just had sex only 3 times ? When a little innocent lamb insist to go in "the lion's den", with 3 hungry wolves waiting, what does it mean for the lamb saying "it was not my fault" ? When the shepherd responsible for the lamb don't do anything to avoid the high level risk, and even support that dangerous behavior, what's the point to be angry about what the wolves do to the lamb ? So, can we seriously say that the bad guys were the wolves ?

Ouch my eyes hurt from reading that. Does the author equate the amount of words a person speaks with intelligence? I skipped 3 pages understand the basics of what happened and could barely finish. Not erotic. Not interesting. I have no interest in any of the characters or any curiosity about who planned the conspiracy to drip Peggy. I thought maybe all the constructive comments would guide the author to improve this chapter. Nope!

Cuck of the Universe contest apparently. 8 unbearably long, boring, repetitious chapters. Of course SHE is the victim in the end.... Only George Anderson could appreciate this story.

CL we have read some terrible stories/dialogue on this site. But, i have never in all my years read such udder nonsense in a story from the dialogue that came out of Peggy’s mouth. And you make her character an astronaut, you have clue at all about the profession. And you are as clueless when it comes to a CIA analyst. I am all about creative licensing when writing a story, but your main character’s qualities are in a different galaxy from what would be their professional skill set. Gary is a cuckold, like it or not, Peg is a narcissist. This story started great, got redundant with the dialogue & the with this last chapter went into the toilet!

Boring as F..k, and just keeps getting worse.

Silly and stupid. Whoever reads this word for word is truly desperate for something to do. Adolescent soap opera rubbish

I'm sure there is a video. It just hasn't come to light yet

Sorry, but this story is just stupid. The characters seem to be possessed by an alien virus. They act - and worse - talk as if they were absolutely brain sick.

The mysterious enemy has put far too much effort in the seduction of Peg for it to be a simple plot to cuck another agency agent. I suspect Gary's plans upset the enemies operations seriously enough to make him a target and render him impotent. This needs exploration.

Did Gary ever check and see if the Doctor was giving his wife any drugs prior to pushing for the libido killing injection? The enemy apparently has a pharmacopeia available, was she maybe subject to some chemically aided brainwashing techniques? Perhaps a dusting of scopolamine and a little rohypnol to make her totally compliant so she will sign the form and take the injection.

Where is the Doctor? Who is interrogating him? Where is bad ass Gary and Marine Sgt "Kill them all, led God sort them out" Major Dad?

And he still hasn't made clear what he saw in her choices in the run up to the mission (even if drugged for the major transgression). The pre-shot concealment of actual mission length. The angry retort when he asked her if the injection could be neutralized - a total angry rejection of his suggestion - indicating that nothing he wanted that could possibly thwart her plan would be allowed to interfere with her precious rocket ride. The cut off of affection even if sexual relations were repugnant to her. She should have figured out the loss of closeness was as bad as the sexual deprivation and even if guilty about her selfishness, she needed to suck it up and fix things.

What is her actual commitment to him and the marriage? She can talk it, where is the show it?

just wondering why he is keeping the slut time to pack his bags and hit the road either that or get revenge on the Russians and NASA

Wondering if zmBGdallas is a crazy feminist or a woman? Peg is the victim? Really? Gary treated her appallingly before she left?

Where is your head at?

Peg decided to cut off her husband for nearly a year, went ahead with radical drugs despite their effect on the relationship, even though Gary told her they were wrong, she made all the decisions without even speaking to him despite the fact they’d affect his life for almost a year. She ignored him, disrespected him and humiliated him. Then ran off to space.

In space she cut off contact with him, humilated gum and her family after the space walk. Then engaged in an enthusiastic fuckfest when she landed, yes she made have been drugged but by her own admission leapt into it and enjoyed every minute.

She then feels a need to tell him more and more details each another knife to his back.

She cost him his job with her selfish nsrcistic behaviour, humiliated him in the eyes of his family, friends work colleagues and, he’ll all around the world.

You’re a clown really, have you read the entire rambling debacle Orr only scummed to the last part?

There’s not a single man in this planet, America’s army of cucks not withstanding who would have still been with her before she went to space and certainly not after she came back.

He’s a pathetic wimp of a man living in a Disney dreamworld of princesses and knights nobody would suffer so much for the love of a woman especially not one who’s selfish, narcissistic svd down right cruel and there’s millions of women like that, their ten a penny.

He is just wallowing in self pity while she is indulging in an organisation of self flagellation.

He needs to just get over himself and get on with putting his marriage together. It is the only thing he has left.

To me story makes no sense from the beginning. He says no matter what she wants and says and does he supports her, loves her, will never say no. She says she loves him, doesnt want to hurt him, but will do what he wants, which is to go to space.

So she goes to space, does cheat on him, he is pissed, but does not divorce.

So they got what they wanted and what was expected did occur.

Whats their problem? Move it to non erotic. End it.

I’m done. This is more than silly; adolescent naval contemplation at its lowest. The story is ruined, the characters one dimensional cartoons. Just stop.

I think that even with Peggy's insistence that there was only a few minutes of audio, she is possibly quite naive to believe her 'hosts' wouldn't stoop to recording video of her time with Alexei as well. If this is the case, then she may well have omitted some other details of her lapses thinking that there would be no record, especially if it involved other men and/or sexual activities that she lied about to Gary (either specifically or by ommission). If video evidence then surfaced that showed she had lied to Gary he would have no qualms about dumping her immediately. This would shatter his role as her protector and send him straight to Kathy's arms.

One last comment: Why has there been no mention of Peggy's close family since she landed back on Earth? Surely there should have been some interaction with her parents by now.

Bazza

Too long winded. Way too lomg

I think it is completely repetitive and as others have said five pages to tell one page worth of story - finish it already and get the revenge bit on the others - otherwise its a nothing story

Again the words.

scores are getting lower and lower.

Another really short story about a cheating wife and a cuck husband. The wife has a really good job in a great corporation, but now she is assigned to a new department with a promise of a good enhancement of her career. She will have to work with a new boss a two other colleagues (all three males), that will teach her the new role. She will have to spend all weekends for about six months in another city far from home, and she will live in a home property of the corporation, together with the 3 guys. The husband is a little worried that the wife will cheat on him staying 6 months away from home, but the wife keep telling him "don't be a baby, you are an insecure man, believe me, it's going to be all for the better". In the 6 months away from home she almost never call the husband and in only one occasion the communicate in a video call, she show herself in an intimate behaviour with her three work colleagues, but for the husband there is still nothing to worry about. When after the six months the wife come back home, she tell her husband all the torrind events she enjoyed, night clubs, dancing, drinking and of couse a lot of raw sex with all the three work colleagues. But it was not her fault, since she was feeling so alone, so far away from home without her husband, and she was feeling very horny, so after always drinking a bit too much, she had sex for the night almost every time. So who are the culprits for this outcome ? The cheating wife ? The cuck do-nothing husband ? The three work colleagues ? But of course the three colleagues and so the husband has now to go after them with killing purposes. How many words does it need to say that cheating for a wife is perfectly acceptable, the same for the cucking role for the husband, as long as there are endless psycho-dialogues between them to sustain this slightly unbalanced vision. It sounds a bit like a propaganda manifest.

Mbg,

Did you read the story or are you a dumbass? The point author made about 78 times is hubby is not mad at her about the rape.

I know this is a fictional drama and I shouldn't be so critical but in real life he would never have lost his job. The agency would rally around him and go after the Russians for daring to attack one of their people. Which is also why in real life, American and Russian intelligence agencies have had an agreement since the early days of the Cold War not to go after each other's agents. Both sides know that a secret war between the two would be mutually assured destruction for their intelligence agencies. And then we have in this story the addition of NASA, which the Russian space program can't really function without. Russia would be insane to actually try this. Though I guess recent events show that doing something crazy stupid isn't that unrealistic for Russia.

You have given a whole new meaning to the phrase, "You can't make this shit up.". Why bother?

You have given a whole new meaning to the phrase, "You can't make this shit up.". Why bother?

I'm honestly curious what you have to say to ALL of the comments telling you that your inane psychobabble bullshit is not good. It's like a server telling you not to touch the fajita plate because it's hot and you do it anyway then are surprised when it hurts.

What are you hoping to achieve here? The first few chapters, people were trying to offer constructive criticism in how to make your stories better.

Do you think that everyone is wrong and you're right?

I'm honestly so glad to see that your scores keep dipping lower and lower. You're not learning and you deserve it.

This is a straight up cuck and whore fodder story.

You have your overly emotional, pathetically ineffective and impotent protagonist who is also beyond saintly.

You also have the ridiculously unreal bitch/whore who behaves like a goat hit by the martian slut/bitch ray before the offense and then is sorry later.

You even have the whore telling her good little cuck about her fuckery in detail, just like all good cuck stories.

Your characters are just not attractive.

This could be some fun if Gary fucked all three Russian's wives and/or daughters into oblivion and released the videos on Russian porn sites.