Squaring Things Up

But all that would take over a year. Milo couldn't very well sue on grounds of adultery, since he had also done that. So, no fault with minor children required a year's separation - with no marital sex.

All in all, Milo was uncertain about divorce. But he was more and more sure that he eventually wanted out of Mary's orbit. It was her uncaring flaunting of her adultery at her work that sealed that deal.

And Mary knew that as she was out on the patio sobbing when Joseph spoke up. It took Milo some time to catch up.

He felt that he was in a dilemma. He wanted the children to have an intact family, at least until they went off to college. But he thought that he wouldn't be able to carry that off. Mary's fling had fundamentally altered the dynamic. Anna had sensed that as soon as she came home. So, if he was asking himself what arrangement would be best for the kids, he wasn't so sure about the answer. He spent a solid amount of time researching that. But the research was so non-specific as to be useless. It was clear, however, that a parental rift damaged the children, no matter whether there was a divorce, separation or an uneasy reconciliation.

He decided simply to discuss all this with Mary. She was as smart as anyone he knew, and she was, of course, well acquainted with their own unique situation.

When the week of celibacy ended on Sunday, Milo took Mary for a walk in the afternoon. He laid out his dilemma. He was careful to put it in emotionally neutral terms. He didn't say, outright, that his love for her was waning. But she knew that.

Mary said, "Milo, I need some time to consider all this. I want to thank you for putting it all so...so...so much like Spock would."

Milo laughed. Spock was one of their favorite characters. It used to be, for them, a trigger word. 'We need a Spock moment.' It meant calm down and look at things. Don't argue. See both sides.

He said, "It's been a while since we used that. Maybe ten years. But it fits."

"Yeah. You know, I'm going to have more trouble doing Spock about this than you. That makes me sad."

"Mary, I haven't stopped loving you. But....but, you've made it so difficult to see how we could resume what we had. That's gone."

"Something else? You know, I don't believe it will be possible to map that out in advance. Not even for us. Not even for Spock."

Milo nodded, acknowledging the point.

He said, "Let's start by you just....explain the Todd thing to me. I can see how attractive he is. But..."

"Of course, I've thought about it. What I came up with is so mundane. I'm getting old. We've been together a long time, and, you know, we developed patterns for things, including sex. That isn't to say that....you always satisfied. But mostly in the same few ways. Good ways. But the same ones."

"So you were bored and anxious." Milo had to bite his tongue to keep from saying more pointed things. Like why not talk to me about it?

"As I said, Milo, mundane. Also, Todd was...is so tempting. I knew that if I went with him, I'd just have a fantastic time."

"And you did."

"Yes. Yes, I did."

Milo paused and then asked, "How was it so different?"

"Maybe we should leave that for now."

"No. Might as well get it out there, Mary."

She looked at him. She decided not to be gentle. She said, "From the first time I was like an animal in heat. I attacked him and he came right back at me. It was raw and low down."

"Even after months?"

"Yes. I looked forward to it all week. I'm not pulling my punches here. It never got old."

"And now? If we try to stay married, will you seek him out?" Milo knew that he was being unfair. He knew that Todd was off the board for a while. But Mary didn't.

Mary didn't answer right away. They walked almost a block before she said, "I don't love him, Milo. I love you. I love my kids. I won't go back to him if it means losing that. But you need to understand....."

Milo broke in, "...that he's as big a temptation now as ever."

"Yes. Milo, can we fuck tonight? Maybe the wrong time to ask, but it would be a big first step."

Milo considered it. But he got hard as he thought about it. He said, "I can't wait."

They were passing a Motel Six. They checked in. When they entered the room, Mary attacked Milo, in the same way she'd done with Todd. She was all over him and he responded. He shoved her down onto her knees and pulled out his rock-hard dick. He didn't have to say anything. Mary was on it with a fervor that she hadn't displayed for him in some time. He let it go on for a while, then lifted her up and put her on the bed. She was wearing a skirt, blouse and panties. Milo shoved aside her panties and entered her. She was wet and ready.

They fucked like savages. It lasted maybe three minutes before the explosion. A mutual explosion.

As they lay next to each other after, Mary asked, "Can we get undressed now?" She said it in a meek voice. Milo grunted and rolled off the bed. He took off his clothes and watched as Mary did the same.

He said, "You're not so bad." She launched herself at him and he went down on the bed. She was on top of him, kissing him and licking his face. She started to growl. Milo got erect, and Mary impaled herself on him. The second time was not as frenzied as the first. But it lasted longer and felt great for both of them.

When that was over, they showered and left the motel. They walked back home, not saying too much. As they approached the house, Mary said, "Thanks, Milo. It was a great start. Or a great finish."

Milo said, "We didn't exactly Spock it, did we?"

They laughed. But the marriage was very far from healed. They both knew that.

Monday morning, they went off to work without further sex, or much discussion.

Milo saw Sara after she returned from morning court. She came to his office. Milo was gentle with her. He said he needed a little more time to work out what would happen. She expressed disappointment, but said, "I can be patient. For a while. You're a good guy, Milo. But you're stuck in a difficult situation. I'll be around. Maybe you could come over to mine and have dinner some evening. Not more than dinner. Meet the girls."

Milo said, "I can see that. Let's wait a minute and see. You're a good person, and very sexy. I could easily....well, if I didn't have the kids, I'd be with you now. But..."

"Yeah. Okay."

Soon after that Milo got a call from Mary, who was fuming. She shouted at Milo, "What did you do to Todd. That bitch has him. I can't believe it."

Milo said, "Time for some Spock, Mary. I didn't have anything to do with it. Zill is her own person. She doesn't go after men because I ask for it."

Mary didn't respond right away. Then she said, "But you knew. Yesterday."

"Yeah. But I needed to see what you'd say about keeping on with Hot Toddy, the Pied Piper of Hamelin. You never said you wouldn't. Not really."

"A moot point at the moment. How could she have...I mean, it was so fast."

"Well, Mary, I can tell you that Zill is a great looking woman, who is so much more than that. Strong and smart. Creative, as well. So, Todd....he stood no chance."

"And how about you?"

"Dunno. A moot point, now. As you just pointed out."

"Yeah. I'm not so sure about that."

"But Mary, why does it make you so angry that Todd is off the board. You said you wanted us to make it. I question your sincerity about that."

"I meant it. I could give it up."

"Yeah. Well talk later. Sara's here." He hung up with that lie.

MARY

Mary was only a little annoyed at Milo after he ended the conversation by disconnecting. The Pied Piper of Hamelin, indeed. She smiled. She should have said, "Rats!" He was quicker than she. She liked that about him. There weren't too many men like that. Especially ones who could also make her have multiple orgasms.

Anyway, the jibe about Sara was probably not true. Still, it got her to thinking....

Todd had told her that he was exclusive with his new girlfriend. Zill. Mary had not reacted well when she heard that name. She scared Todd, and he fled. But she knew that he meant it about Zill. He was currently unavailable.

There were, though, two other young guys at the firm who would be fine fuck buddies. Maybe both at once. After all, Milo had two women at once. She started researching open marriages.

Monday evening Milo and Mary had raucous sex at bedtime. It was loud. After, Mary seemed a little embarrassed by that. The kids' rooms were on the same floor. But it didn't bother Milo, who thought that they might be reassured.

After their sex, they took a shower together and pt on sleepwear. Mary hiked up on her elbow and looked at Milo. That look seemed like trouble to Milo.

Mary said, "Maybe we each need some freedom."

Milo stared at her. He said, "You want, like, a hall pass? What?"

"I said each of us. Open up the marriage."

Milo turned away from her. To him, that was Mary saying she needed more than he could give. And so soon after they had sex.

Mary snuggled up to his back, draped her arm over him. She was worried at his reaction. She said, "I maybe shouldn't have said that now. I looked at it at work when I was thinking about our problems."

Milo said, "You do you, Mary."

Mary said, "It isn't that...well...it isn't that you're inadequate. You're not. But wouldn't you like some variety. You've had that, and I know you liked it."

Milo said, "You know, Mary, before you fucked the boy toy I was well satisfied with our marriage. Now I see that you weren't, and that you wouldn't be in future. So..."

"So?"

"You should find a place. Never bring anyone here. I'll have someone draw up papers."

Mary rolled away. She said, "I was only trying to work things out for both of us. You're the one person in my life that I need the most. I don't want to split up."

"You want to screw around. Probably at the firm, where everyone will know, and the kids will find out. That's not acceptable to me."

"I....we....could be discrete."

"Nah. Not possible. Your law firm is like a junior high school that way."

Milo sat up in bed, stood and started pacing. Mary watched. She was on the edge of tears. She thought that she should have kept her mouth shut. Too late.

Milo stopped and looked at her. He said, "It's simple. I don't want an open marriage, and I don't want you sneaking around. So, I hope you understand me. Can you stay the course, or not?"

Mary nodded. "Yes. Well, I make you this promise: if I feel like I can't do it anymore, I'll discuss it with you."

Milo frowned. "That's what's happening right this very moment. We had a nice time in bed and then you want an open marriage. It's insulting. I'd hate to be the one to cramp your lifestyle. Like I said, you do you."

He scooped up his pillow and took it to his office.

Mary muttered to herself. She started crying softly. After ten minutes she got up and went to find Milo. She opened his office door and found him lying on his office couch. She knelt by him and said, "You'll be the only one for me from now on. I promise. When you left the room, I felt as if the bottom dropped out of my life. Freefall. Dark scary freefall."

Milo slipped off the couch and sat next to her. He said, "Me. Too. I believe we're stuck with each other." Then they cried on each other's shoulder.

The next day Milo spoke to Sara.

ONE YEAR LATER

Milo and Mary were in the second row for Zill's marriage to Todd. They were directly behind Zill's people, and Todd's mom and sisters. Sara and her new friend Judge Harry Baker were next to them. They had been a couple for six months.

Zill looked marvelous in her light pink gown. Todd was beautiful. His rear end was healing up nicely.

The end.