Still The One

As they drove along the highway, when Anne Murray's song, 'Talk it Over in the Morning,' started playing on the radio, Jordan looked over at her, and noticed she was already looking at him. Obviously both of them realizing at once that the lyrics could have been written for them --

'I'd disappointed you by saying things I'd never meant to say

Now after all this time

You say you want to throw our love away'

Jordan squeezed her hand when Anne sang,

'Let's pack our troubles off to bed

Forget those awful things we said

We'll try and sleep instead

We can talk it over in the morning.'

Damn, just hearing those words, made him realize how much he still loved her. And maybe if they had tried to talk it out, they might not be looking at the end of the marriage now.

Looking over at her, he could see that she looked a little sad, listening to the song that seemed to be written about what their life had become. For nearly three decades they'd been inseparable, and still madly in love with each other. And now -- it was over.

Heaving a sigh, Tess just wished he would have opened up and told her what was making him pull away, when she'd asked him, and then maybe they could have worked it out. But with his stubborn streak, she knew his pride would never let him show when he was feeling vulnerable, so he'd just shut down and left her in the dark. So, all she could think of, was that he'd probably had found someone else, and he wanted to end it so he could move on. Because, what other reason could he have?

As Jordan continued to massage her hand, Tess didn't try to pull away, not only because it felt so good to have him touching her again, but she knew this might very well be the last time they ever connected.

An hour later, thankfully, it was still light out when they turned onto the dirt road that led to their cabin. But since the snow had turned to freezing rain, the road was pretty slick. So Jordan took his foot off the gas, and carefully inched along the road, because after making it this far, he sure as hell didn't want them to wind up in a ditch.

Once he'd pulled to a stop out in front, Tess looked up at the cabin he'd painstakingly built just for them, overwhelmed at the feeling of loss that swept through her. Knowing that someone else would soon be enjoying their perfect little hideaway, she just hoped they'd appreciate how much work he and his brother had put into making it their home away from home. And she knew it would sell fast, with it's gorgeous stone front, wrap around deck and cedar siding, sitting up on two acres of beautifully treed land. She'd always loved coming here, and so had their sons, who ran around playing outside like they never did at home.

But it was the times that she and Jordan had spent alone under that slate roof that had her pulse picking up and her heart beginning to race, just thinking about it. It seemed this was the one place where he could really let himself go, and often they'd barely gotten inside, before he started kissing her silly, and peeling her out of her clothes so he could tug her down onto the white shag rug by the fire, where they'd make love by the light of the big stone fireplace for hours. Usually getting so lost in each other, they'd even forget to eat.

And she just wished she knew what happened to the couple that had been so much in love, that were now barely even friends.

Meanwhile, Jordan eyed the icy driveway and shook his head. "Looks like that driveway's sheer ice, so I think I'd better leave the car out here on the road in front, and we'll have to be careful walking up there."

Though she nodded and said, "Okay." Anxiously biting into her lip, Tess looked down at her high-heeled leather boots wondering how on earth she was ever going to negotiate the rise up to the cabin without breaking her neck. But then Jordan surprised her when he got out of the car, came around to her side, opened her door, and without saying a word, he slid his arms around her, picked her up, hugged her tight to his chest and carefully started to make his way up the sloped property toward the cabin.

Of course she didn't argue and just held on tight, especially since she didn't really have much choice. And at least he was wearing proper boots with treads, so he could dig his feet into the ice covered snow and get his footing so they wouldn't fall.

But once he made his way to the wrap around deck, relieved to have made it over the ice out in front without falling, Jordan shook his head, realizing it wouldn't be so easy to get to the door. The cedar deck looked like a skating rink, it was so smooth and slick it would be tricky to get across. Already coated in about a half inch of ice, he decided they'd just have to crawl up the steps and across the deck to get inside, because if they tried it on foot, he knew they'd wind up wiping out and falling.

Jordan carefully set her down on her feet and told her, "Tess, I think we're going to have to crawl to the door. The stairs and deck are way too icy to try and walk across without getting hurt."

Though she nodded and said, "Sure," she winced at the prospect of having to crawl across the ice on her hands and knees with nothing but stockings on her legs, especially with how heavy the freezing rain was coming down, already getting them soaked. Still, they'd come this far and she hated the idea of giving up, turning around and going home without getting inside one last time.

So, once he handed her his gloves, that were so big on her they looked like something a clown would wear, she gave him a little smile, thanked him and slipped them on. But when he took off his coat and tried to wrap it around her waist to protect her legs, she shook her head and refused it, knowing it wouldn't be fair to him to freeze while she was covered. Then after heaving a shaky breath, she gingerly slid her feet onto the first step, and then carefully got down on her hands and knees, shivering at the shock of the icy surface on her stocking clad skin, that instantly bit so hard into her flesh it stung.

As she began to work her way up the stairs, Jordan got in behind her, just in case she fell, and though it took them a few minutes to get to the top of the staircase, he blew out a relieved breath when they'd finally made it, with no one getting hurt. Then he said, "Hang on, and I'll unlock the door." He got around her and carefully crawled over the slick deck on his hands and knees. Then he reached up for the doorknob till he was resting his weight on his knees. Once he got his key out, he heaved a sigh of relief when he tried the handle and the door didn't stick, seeing it was also covered in a pretty thick coating of ice.

Looking back and seeing Tess drenched and shivering, he slid onto his back, and made his way over to her and told her, "Crawl on top of me." Though she rolled her eyes, smirking at the idea of using his body as a conveyance, she did as he asked, glad to be crawling onto his big warm body and off the ice covered deck. Then with her arms wound tightly around his neck, and her body spread over his, though both of them were cold, he couldn't resist staying in place for a second to admire the view.

Looking right into her eyes, he thought from the sparkle in hers, that she looked pretty happy to be chest to chest with him again. And it had been so long since they'd been close enough to kiss, that he almost gave in and touched his lips to hers. But not too sure about how she'd react, and seeing as his ass felt like it was about to freeze off, he quit staring and began to use his elbows and feet to gradually work them back towards the door. Then when they were close enough to get in, Tess crawled off him and scrambled inside on her hands and knees, with Jordan right behind her, quietly chuckling at how ridiculous their trip had turned out. Once they were inside, and got to their feet, he slammed the door shut to keep the cold wind and freezing rain out, muttering, "Thank god we made it inside."

Shivering, Tess said between her chattering teeth, "Yeah, no kidding." With how cold she looked, before he even kicked off his boots, Jordan went over and grabbed the blanket they kept on the end of the couch, and wrapped it around her. Brushing the wet hair out of her eyes, seeing how hard she was shivering, and the way her teeth were chattering, though tempted to pull her into his arms, to try and warm her up, like he normally would have done, instead he told her, "You look frozen, Tess. I think you should go look for some dry clothes to put on."

Her body quivering right to her toes, all she could do was nod, too cold to even speak. After she unzipped her boots and slipped them off, she made her way to their bedroom at the back of the cabin, that overlooked the lush forest behind them, grabbing a few towels on the way from the bathroom to dry off.

Lucky for her, she'd left some winter woollies in the dresser, so at least she could get into something warm and dry once she'd towelled off. After she'd changed, feeling so much warmer, she wandered over to the big bay window and let out a sad little sigh. It was a view she'd always adored. Even on a dull gloomy day like this, it was almost too pretty for words. Surrounded by big tall trees, now covered in a blanket of virgin white snow, shimmering like diamonds with a coating of ice, she hated to think this would be the last time she'd ever look out this window to take it all in.

Then she smiled as she looked down at their bed, remembering the morning they'd been cuddling together half asleep, when a deer had come wandering up to the window and peeked inside at them, startling them at first, until they'd both laughed at how odd it felt to have it staring at them through the window. And when Jordan ran and got some carrots, she'd watched fascinated from their bed as he'd carefully approached it and got it to accept a few bites, before it got nervous and bounded away, back into the cover of the forest.

But when she looked up now, she couldn't believe her eyes. And without even thinking, she called out, "Jordan, come here, quick."

Seconds later he was in the bedroom, asking, "Tess, what's wrong, you okay?"

"No, nothing's wrong. Look," she said, pointing at the clearing at the back of their property.

And when he came and stood beside her, they both said, "Wow," as they watched a beautiful tawny brown deer stop nibbling at the bushes, and lift its head to look right at them.

"I wonder if that's the one that came to the window that morning." Jordan asked.

"It could be. But isn't it beautiful?"

Though he nodded, he found him gaze wandering to her profile, thinking she was every bit as beautiful as he remembered when he'd first set eyes on her in high school. And he knew no one would ever guess she was in her forties. Still slender and toned and absolutely gorgeous with her big blue eyes and soft shoulder-length blonde hair, some days he could hardly believe that she was his wife.

Well, at least for the time being.

As they stood together admiring the fawn, when he slipped his arm around her waist, without even thinking Tess leaned her head against his chest and softly sighed. But then when he pressed a kiss to the top of her head, though it felt nice, it made her realize that it had always been second nature for them just to touch and kiss each other whenever they were close. And now it felt almost strange to be held by him again, especially for him to show her some affection, which he hadn't done in so long, she'd almost forgotten what it felt like.

Feeling slightly flustered and not sure what else to do, she pulled away and said a little awkwardly, "Well, you should probably get some dry clothes on, too. And I'll go make us something hot to drink." Then she stopped in the doorway, turned back and said, "Oh, and I guess considering the weather, the real estate agent won't be coming tonight?"

"No, I just noticed she sent me a text. And rather than risk driving in this weather, she said she'd rather reschedule for another weekend." Tess nodded glad that they could spend a few more hours on their own, without having to discuss selling the place.

As she passed the living room, she was relieved to see he'd gotten a fire going in the fireplace, and thought it was nice to hear music playing on the radio, at least until she heard Alessia Cara singing, "Oh, when did you fall out of love with me?" Which made her shoulders sag as she wondered when her husband had decided that he didn't love her anymore; deciding it wasn't a song she wanted to hear, she headed for the kitchen.

But then she looked up. Seeing the lights were starting to flicker, she knew at least they'd have the fire to keep them warm if the power went out, especially since the cabin only had electric heat.

Once she'd made them both a mug of hot chocolate, Jordan accepted the mug and thanked her, then nodding out the big front window at his now ice covered SUV, he said, "You know I don't think we're going to be getting out of here tonight. And I just hope you don't have any plans for Valentine's Day tomorrow, because we could be stuck here till some of that ice starts to melt. And I don't think it'll be any time soon with how heavy that freezing rain's still coming down."

"I don't have any plans," she said, sounding defensive even to her own ears, since she wasn't the one who'd gone and found someone new. But she imagined whoever he was seeing would be more than a little disappointed when he had to tell her that he was stuck in the cabin with his soon to be ex-wife, and wouldn't be able to take her out for a romantic Valentine's dinner.

Then the tension broke when Jordan laughed at the unmistakable sound of her stomach starting to growl. He smiled and told her, "I think I'd better take a look in the freezer to see if we can find you something to eat."

She followed him into the kitchen, surprised to find him pulling a couple of nice looking steaks out of the freezer along with a package of stuffed baked potatoes and a big bag of broccoli. Looking puzzled, she said, "I don't remember leaving all that in there," sure that they'd taken nearly everything home with them when they'd come out together for the last time in late summer.

"Well, my brother and I were up here a couple of weeks ago, with my cousins Vince and Lucas, for a guy's weekend and some snowmobiling. And they said to leave the stuff in the freezer, so there'd be something to eat in case anyone came up again."

"Well, I guess it's lucky you did, or we'd be stuck having canned soup for dinner."

"No way we're having soup, with all the stuff we've got in here." Then he showed her, putting the sirloin steaks, potatoes and veggies on the counter along with some bacon wrapped chicken breasts, and a big package of Italian sausage. And she noticed there was even some of her favorite chocolate ice cream and a shrimp ring, and from what she could see, even more stuff was tucked in behind.

Tess couldn't believe her eyes. "Wow, you guys really know how to eat."

Jordan chuckled. "Well, there was a lot more than this. But seeing as there were four hungry guys to feed, we brought more than enough just to be on the safe side."

Tess took a look in the fridge below, and noticed there were also two full bottles of red and white wine, along with about a dozen beer, and even a bottle of champagne, which she didn't imagine the guys would be into. "So, have you had your lady-friend up here yet?" she asked, cocking an eyebrow as she closed the fridge door, so she could see his face when he answered.

Jordan looked confused. "I don't have a girlfriend, Tess. I haven't been seeing anyone else. And how could I, when I'm still married to you?"

"But you won't be for much longer, will you?" He rolled his eyes. As if she had to remind him, since it was all he could think about lately, that his marriage was over and he was about to lose the only woman he'd ever loved.

He nodded at her. "And how about you, I imagine your boyfriend will be disappointed if he's made dinner plans for tomorrow night at some romantic spot for the two of you, when you don't show up."

Tess tipped her head and just stared at him. "I don't know what you're talking about, Jordan, I'm not seeing anyone. All I do is go to work, and come home to the boys every night. And I'm sure if you ask them, they'll tell you I barely ever go anywhere anymore, even with friends just for coffee, since now I'm all they've got."

Annoyed that she'd even vaguely accuse him of abandoning his sons, when he saw them as often as he could, and was always on the phone with them, he thrust a finger at his chest and told her, "Don't you worry, Mark and David still have me, and always will, no matter what happens with us." Then he leaned closer, so he could look her right in the eye. Now that she'd got his back up, though he'd planned to bide his time, he just went for it, and told her what he'd seen. "But I think it's time I told you, that I took a look at your phone one day when you were in the shower. And I read a text from that guy you work with, and I know you were having an affair when we were still together, which is why I agreed to the divorce, so you could move on with your life, since I figured that's what you wanted."

Stunned, Tess blinked a few times, not really caring that he'd took a look at her phone, since she didn't think she had anything to hide. Amazed that he'd believe that of her, she stared right back at him, and told him the truth, "I never cheated on you, Jordan. And I don't remember any texts that I wouldn't want you to see."

"Well, in the one I read, he was calling you sweetie, and he was telling you that he'd booked your usual table at his favorite hotel, and he could hardly wait to get to it."

Totally confused, she kept looking at him and blinking, trying to figure out what he could have read. "I have no idea what you're talking about." Obviously there was no way she would have forgotten getting a text like that. "Did you read who it was from?"

He nodded and told her, "Yeah, I saw his name," recalling every word of the text that ruined their marriage. "Guy's name was Martin. And isn't that also the name of the guy you work for?"

Her eyes flew open when it hit her and she clapped her hand over her mouth, shocked. "Oh, my god, I can't believe this. You thought I was having an affair with Martin?" The thought of getting busy with her boss was so ridiculous, that she started laughing and just couldn't stop. But once she was finally able to catch her breath, she told him, "Believe me, Jordan, if I were ever to have an affair, which, by the way, I would never do while we're still married, hooking up with Martin would never even cross my mind. He is definitely the last person I'd ever want to go out with. I'm sure he's older than my father, because I know he's got daughters older than I am, and he's even got a few grandkids. And even if I were single, I would never be interested in dating a guy as old as my dad."

Still not convinced, he asked her, "Okay, then how do you explain him calling you gushy names and arranging dinners for the two of you at a hotel? And don't think I didn't notice the change in you when you started working in that office, so don't try and deny that, too. And as much as I hate to admit it, when I'd see you all dressed up going off to work, it looked to me like you were on the prowl. All I know is, you never dressed that sexy around the house."

Tess rolled her eyes. "Of course I never dress like that at home. You think I'd take an hour to fix my hair and makeup every morning, put on a suit and high heels just to make lunches, cook dinner, clean the bathrooms, wash the floors, do the laundry and help the kids with their homework? I'd have to be insane, and when would I even find the time for all that?" But when he didn't answer, she told him, "I don't know if you realize that I'm going to be forty-five soon, and being the oldest woman in the office, I sure as heck don't want to look it. So, of course I do my best to try and look appealing when I go to work, otherwise I could find myself out of a job. Believe me nobody wants a tired looking old woman working in a trendy office like mine. You guys are lucky, you can get away with a lot more than we can. You can lose all your hair, dress like slobs, put on a ton of weight, and burp and let one rip whenever you please, but a woman has to be careful about trying to look good and act just so, if she wants to keep working, and unfortunately that's just how it is."