Taken by a Bear

Dekker's apartment was very like mine which -- as it was in the same building -- I suppose I should have expected. Looking at it, I could see something I had not seen before, which is that mine was furnished and decorated in a feminine manner -- it was an apartment in which a single young woman could feel completely at home -- and that was not something you would say of Dekker's. I suppose being raised in a family with four women and no men was responsible for my taste, while Dekker's was suitable for a bear.

I went briefly to my own apartment to pick up my nightdress and a clean pair of panties for the morning. When I came back, Dekker was smoking a cigarette. I said, 'I won't be long,' and went into the bathroom. When I came out in my nightie, Dekker put down his cigarette and took my hands in his. 'My God, you look beautiful,' he said. 'You're right, you should have been born a girl. Except that, if you had been, I wouldn't want you.'

'And do you?'

'I can't remember ever wanting anyone this much. Why don't you get into bed and wait for me?'

He didn't take long, and when he came to bed he was naked. I pressed him onto his back, knelt between his open thighs and did once more with my tongue what had given him such pleasure earlier. This time, instead of lifting my head away, he held it in place while -- once again, let us use the word -- he fucked my mouth until he came. I had never tasted a man's sperm before and I knew in that moment that I would want to taste it again and again. He held me tight. 'Tomorrow is Sunday. I don't have to work. Do you?'

I shook my head. 'I'm strictly Monday to Friday.'

'Can we spend the day together?'

'And the night, I hope.'

He smiled. 'And the night. And maybe on Monday morning your soreness will be gone.'

'I hope so. But even if it isn't, I don't think I'll tell you so.'

We fell asleep wrapped in each other's arms.

I woke at six. Dekker's arms were still around me and one of his great paws was on my stomach under my nightie. I took hold of it and moved it down, holding it in place as he stirred into wakefulness. His warm lips bussed the back of my neck while his hand closed around my cock. Slowly it began to move. I rolled onto my back and put my arms around his shoulders as he rose over me, bringing me yet again to orgasm. I said, 'What would you like from me?'

'How would you like to use that magnificent tongue again?'

So that is what I did.

And then we settled once more into a state that was half asleep and half awake and it was eight when we began to think about the day. Dekker pressed his lips to my throat. 'To think that I was ready to take you by force yesterday. What a waste that would have been. Why don't you take a shower while I think about breakfast?'

I came into the kitchen after my shower wearing only the clean panties that I had picked up the previous evening. He smiled at me. 'Eggs? Bacon? Toast? Coffee?'

'Sounds lovely.'

After breakfast, I loaded the dishwasher while Dekker smoked a cigarette. He said, 'Anything special you want to do today?'

'Yes. I want to be with you.'

'Right answer. You said last night that you wouldn't go to the Mayfair in a skirt. Does that mean you have one?'

'I have skirts and I have dresses. But I only ever wear them in my own apartment. I don't want anyone else to see me like a woman.'

'Does that include me?'

'Of course it doesn't include you. But it does mean I don't want to be seen outside my apartment dressed as anything but a man. Even for the short distance from there to here.'

'Well, maybe we'd better spend the next few hours at your place. And you can show me what you look like as Penelope.'

While Dekker sat on the balcony with his cigarettes, I went through my wardrobe. I chose a long flowing dress on which I had spent more than I really should have. When I came out of the sitting room onto the balcony, Dekker stood up. The expression on his face warmed me to the very heart. 'My darling Penny, you look beautiful.'

'Thank you. And you look like what you are. A red-blooded male.'

'Do you find it hard to shop for this stuff?'

'Not online. I don't think I'd ever have the courage to go into a store and try something on.'

'It's a good job you don't have hairy legs.'

'I shave them.'

'You do? Where did you learn to do that?'

'I grew up with three sisters. All older than me.'

'Of course. You haven't brought a cushion to sit on.'

'I'm not sore any more, my darling.'

'Oh? Really? You mean it?'

'I do. But I'm hoping some time today you might want to change that.'

'You want to feel sore again?'

'Not really. But I want to be fucked again and if I feel sore after it, that's a price I'm ready to pay.' I thought about what I had just said. 'Do you have any idea how big a change you've brought about in me in twenty-four hours?'

'It couldn't have happened if you hadn't wanted it.'

'I know that. And you cannot know how grateful I am. There was a door in my life -- I knew it was there and I knew it would always remain closed. Then you came and you opened it and I walked through.'

'No regrets?'

'I'd be insane to regret anything. You completed me. You fulfilled me. You made it possible for me to be me.' I leaned across the table and kissed him on the lips.

That's my "First Time" story. Everyone has one -- everyone, that is, who is not a virgin. We all come into this world with no sexual experience and I'm aware that for some people their sex lives are so unsatisfactory that they wish they could leave the world in the same virginal state. It hasn't been that way for me. Whether I would ever have accepted what I really was and given in to lusts I believed to be wrong had Dekker not decided he was going to have me anyway is something I can't say. But he did.

Thirty years have gone by since the story I've recounted here. My mother died ten years ago; two years later I came out to my three sisters, who laughed and told me they had always known. Dekker and I did not last long as an item because, whatever he said about loving me and finding the person he'd been looking for, the reality was that love was not what Dekker wanted. He only felt fulfilled when he used force. Eight months after we had met, that desire to rape came up against someone less submissive than me; his victim went to the police and, so far as I know, Dekker is still in jail. I expect he finds enough of what he called "boy-pussy" there to keep him happy but I imagine he sometimes hankers after one of Mayfair's London Broils.

And me? I have a bear of my own now. We share a house and a life. Thank you, Dekker. Flawed you may be but I couldn't have got here without you.