All Comments on 'The Best Friend's Girlfriend'

This should be rated H for Hot and Excellent. Good story line

Awesome, awesome, awesome. I love this story.

Another wonderful story! Glad you're over your writer's block, keep them coming!

A really good story. Look forward to reading more!!

Such a wonderful story and I love it so much more knowing you are south african. my partner and I have been going through a really rough patch and seperation, your story reminded me of all the reasons why I fell in love with her, she truly resembles hunter in every way and I too was involved with a man when she stole my heart back. I fell in love with her when I was in grade 8, I knew the very moment I met her, she would make the greatest impact in my life, sadly she wasn't ready to come out after the mess of 5 relationships we had throughout high school, I became a suicidal emotional wreck, I landed up in hospital with a badly slit wrist having to have stitched because I could not bare to be with out her and I had learnt she fell In love with another girl...eventually I managed to piece myself back together and I decided to date a man, I didn't love him but he adored me and it felt nice to be someones everything, but she knew she could never leave school and matriculate without having me in the rest of her life so she fought for me and in the last month of our matric year, she made me hers...the next yr In 2011 my father passed away from cancer, 9 days before my 19th birthday, if it wasn't for my partner I would not have made it emotionally

Your story has made me smile, cry, fall in love and yearn my partner again.

Thank you so much

Bianca Jade

Ever leave. Please. You're one of the best writers that are currently active. You have it all.

Keep writing! Good work.

... people you thanked for Editing, etc.?

Shame they didn't do a better job!

You know how sad it is to hear that you have to spend your free time criticizing others for something you probably don't have the guts to do? If you have a problem with my writing may I suggest you refrain from reading it? I truly hope that you get over all the anger and hatred you have inside and I wish you good luck with your life. May I suggest therapy? It apparently does wonders for the soul.

your creativity always amaze me and never tired of reading your stories. you are one of the great writers I admired here.bless you always and your `angel`.(cinder)

please keep writing as much as u can!

(B.K~)

Or, in other words, don't feed the trolls

As another author who has had her fair share of negative comments from cowards who post anonymously, my advise is to ignore them or even, and I'm sure all true Lit fans would agree, simply delete them.

You know how good this story is and, if not, a 4.69 average and 16 favs (as of 15th July) ought to be a better response to the nay sayers.

XXX

Lisa

Thanks for the advice, I was just caught on a bad day. I can't believe people read or try to be literate and miss the story to count the mistakes. Nobody is perfect and I just hate it when people have something to say but don't write themselves and have no idea what really goes into a story.

I haven't touched ground in over a week and today was exceptionally busy so I was caught in a bout of Monday blues. But I think I spoke for all authors, if they want to count the mistakes why not try to solve a math problem? They will get more value for their time that way, in my opinion.

Thanks for the comment.

I always love reading your work. It's well thought out and the story always moves me. Thank you.

Speaking as an author on here (if i can even call myself that), I had gotten through the first few pages on a Word document of a story that was very similar to this one. Falling in love with my best friends girl, etc. I read this one and then proceeded to delete mine. I believe you wrote this better than I could have. Heck of a story. And I do love your comment back to anonymous. I wrote in one of my stories for people to leave constructive criticism to not just say "this sucks," and sure enough someone left "this sucks." I look forward to reading more of your work! :)

I am actually a fan of your work so to see you write this on my story is kind of amazing. I wrote this one to get rid of the writers block and was happy to see it well received. Thank you so much and those who just write 'this sucks' are normally the ones who can't put a decent sentence together, lol. Let's call it jealousy.

So amazing, each story you write is incredible. I'd pay to read these. Thank you for yet again a great read.

-SC

that was the best story i have ever read on here

The final part of Junky has been posted! Keep your eyes peeled for the latest in Ashley and Natalie's lives! Happy reading Litsters!

SAb, I wanted to express the pleasure I have received reading this creative tale of tail

As for the pissant trolls who lurk throughout the Literotica site, like an infestation of chiggers, they have NO puissant influence.

Unfortunately, most critics who opinionate were missed-educated into learning Academic English. As stultifying and tediously monotonous a method of avoiding human communication as has ever been devised by mankind since Neo-Confuscionism.

None of the multitude of word-processor programs collate well between the authors, the story editors, the site editors, the site schedulers, Operating Systems or the web networks. Even the different versions of the same WP programs do not coordinate well. After all these sloppily coded filters, we the readers are fortunate to receive ANY coherent material.

In addition, the spell-check functions are homophone-phobic. Though, when auto-replace inserts the wrong word into the right context the product can be hilarious.

The whiners fail to comprehend that, anywhere along this concatenation we call the Internet, there are badly coded sub-routines that regularly mess up the posted products. It is a supra-natural event that any of us receive legible writing.

Put a bowl of uisge beatha out for the Wee Folk, 'cause sober they are a nasty bunch of sabot's spitefully {spritefully?} messing around with your systems. Passed out, they'll leave you alone to enjoy our technological marvels.

SAb, I look forward to your future postings, thank you for what you have already shared with us.

This story hits so close to home it scares me. Losing someone you idolize, falling for your best friends girl.. Losing your best friend in the process.. It all brings back the memories i thought i had lost forever, the overwhelming of emotions for the ones i love, and the ones i lost.

I lavish in awe at the sight of talent in which you present to your readers. It is truly amazing how you can make the love between characters, such as Hunter & Caylen, come alive.

I love the story and please some more.I couldn't stop crying and it's gave me to keep on until I find NY true love!

You've captivated my heart, one of my best stories ever read here. Great Job

It's so fucking good made me cum twice.

I enjoy your writing style and can't wait for something new to post.

Thank you!

You call the dogs Greydains. Are you sure you didn't mean Great Danes?

I thought that this was a terrible story. I don't know if it is b/c of the quick jumps in time and places. It's probably the unbelievable characters.

The actions of the main characters make no logical or emotional sense. And, the whole fucking the secretary scene was truly ridiculous.

I haven't logged in but my Lit name is willieriley. Fell free to send feedback to me there.

I appreciate all feedback and I'm sorry that you didn't enjoy the story. Unfortunately I can't please everyone but just for future reference, posting here takes guts and there's no need to be rude about it. Criticize respectfully, why would you want to break someone down?

Just my opinion, although your comment won't deter me.

This is one of my favorite stories, so it is an affront to me when someone just dogs my taste :)

Not to diminish the guts it takes to write and post a story, but I had to smile when I read the authors comment... I am not a writer, but I have gotten some brutal emails from authors and readers for some of my feedback.. And I think I am one of the nicest, most constructive readers/posters on the site! So I am going to say it takes some guts to post feedback using your user name :)

Great writing, something, soft and slushy to fall asleep thinking about. I like your style of writing.

This story had a tremendous amount of promise but it fell flat for me at the end. I think everything was just a bit too rushed, particularly the rush to turn Hayden into a villain. I never for a second doubted that Hunter and Caylen would end up together because you never painted Hayden as a viable alternative (and that's before you turned him into a guy who'd beat up his surrogate sister). There was never any suspense and that hurt your story, IMO.

This story could have been great but ultimately, it's just okay.

This is for the most part, a pretty good story. Like several others who've commented, the only thing that bothers me is Hayden's behavior. Sure, you foreshadowed his infidelity with the comment about his secretary in the beginning, but his sudden reversal from best friend to dire enemy seemed less than completely believable. Would Hunter have been that good of a friend if he had that kind of hair trigger temper? That sort of thing isn't generally speaking, a unique event. That kind of temper is a pattern. It manifests repeatedly and noticeably. I understand for the story to progress, Caylen and Hayden had to separate, but that seemed to demean the character of Hunter's "best friend" or really call her judgement into question in the first place. The only reason I can figure for it is, it makes Hunter and Caylen's betrayal of him more palatable. This singular poorly contrived plot device is all that lessened the enjoyment of the tale for me. You still get 4 stars for the effort though, because most of it was decent.

SAb, you tell a good story and you're always worth reading but I have to agree with the last couple of comments. The switch in Hayden's character just didn't ring true. I'm not young and I've been around (military, a branch of law enforcement etc) and I've known a lot of men who had all their brains in the tips of their dicks (the Bill Clinton syndrome). But it was also my experience that if they were basically nice people, then they stayed that way. If they were bad, then they'd always been obviously bad. So Hayden suddenly turning from Mr Nice Guy into a vicious thug wasn't really plausible (unless, perhaps, he"d taken a draught of Dr Jekyll's famous elixir?). But keep writing---as I said, you're worth it.

In spite of the gratification that you feel when a story is finished, there's no disputing that writing is just plain hard work! As others have said earlier, the writer simply ran out of steam toward the end, and the story more coasted to an ending rather than a well-reasoned emotionally satisfying conclusion. That's no sin; while regrettable, I've seen the same from some of the best authors in the world, and each experience is a lesson. I believe that this author will recover nicely and entertain us with very nice work in the future.

Fantastic story without relying on nothing but sex to make the story! The relationship and interaction between the people was awesome, realistic (for the most part although I can believe it) and just excellent writing! Keep it up!!!

This story made me realize dat we're bound by d choices we make nd we should always follow our heart. Thumbs up 2 d author

Very, very well written. Absolutely loved it. Hope to read more stories..

you wrote the story exactly as what you intend us(readers) to read; with vividness. A story becomes interesting merely not by its content but also by how well it was written. Upon reading the first or second paragraphs, I knew I will be reading something good from a great writer. thanks!

Easy this story is just simply AMAZING

5🌟's

Another great love story from SAbitch. Loved it!

It was sometimes a bit difficult to follow, like some of the character's lines got mixed up, but all in all, it was a fantastic story. Thank you for sharing it with us!

Simply beautiful.

I'm hoping and wishing that you can find time to write again.your stories were simply amazing that one will not get tired of rereading it no mtter of how many times.Have a blessed life SABITCH .(cinder)

I'm not normally a reader of lesbian stories (I'm a straight, married, man) but a wonderful love story is a wonderful love story. Bravo! -- JRZ

South Africans or do you mean those invaders barbaric criminals living with the blood of the real South Africans on there hands living on stolen land.

Welcome back. As usual, loved reading your work. Looking forward to your upcoming stories. Thank you.

How can you call the Samoans dirty rugby players. Boks are the worst I have seen

... and whatever happened to Hayden?

Lovely story. I have ignored the grammatical faux pas due to being from SA. Might just st read another.

Since it's been ten years, I imagine that you'll never see this comment, but maybe it will help someone else who does see it.

You are a masterful romance writer and a whiz at tastefully and erotically describing sexual encounters, and you are certainly in the top ten romance authors on this site. If you could write 150 pages I have no doubt that you could be a commercially successful writer because a professional editor would take care of your word choices. But in the meantime, you need a new proofreader because some of the word choices you make are inexcusable. For example:

1. I don't know if it's acceptable slang in SA, but I am assuming that when you refer to Hunter's dogs as "graydains", you mean the large animal referred to in the rest of the world as "Great Danes".

2. In the sentence: "Hunter smiled endearingly at the adorable site and decided to make sure that she saw that" the word is 'adorable sight" vs 'site' which is a location.

3. In this sentence is one of the more basic, but egregious errors that is taught to very young children in the first stages of grammar education: "but you're heart isn't with Hayden and hers is already with"; for god's sake it's your and not the contraction you're which is short for you are.

3 And lastly, is a case of simply using the word and being incorrect as to its definition: "There was no one around to help and her desperate pleas for help was drowned out of the solidarity of their home." The word you're looking for is 'solidity' indicating very solid, instead of solidarity which means unity of a group.

In spite of these quibbles, I enjoyed the story immensely, and though I would have liked to have seen more of a resolution with Hayden, I would still give it a Five Star rating.

As 'nogravy' said, you won't be seeing this.

Despite that fact, I have to say that the writing style and technique of this piece FAR exceeds that of your earlier works. This was quite readable, fairly moving, and had far few mistakes than the earlier pieces (especially Junky).

Though, on second reading, I still wanted to know what happened to Hayden.

Great read.

A lovely story, irrespective of the Grammer police comments!

Would've been nice to see Hayden get his comeuppance, a potential second part filling the years in between?

Thank you, and again, a lovely story!

Typical of this section. Make the MALE INTO A MONSTER OF A VILLAIN TO ABSOLVE CAYLAN AND HUNTER'S CHEATING. Just look at the end. Hayden poisoned their hearts...really?