All Comments on 'The Brightest Coin'

I liked your writing, the imagery, and the inner dialogue.

I mean the following as constructive critique:

You used a number of near misses that are almost homophones. Tambour (a rounded frame- as in tambourine- or a sliding segmented door as in a roll top desk. “Timbre” describes the quality of sound.

Hair is tousled, unless it’s excessively so, then a tussle might be necessary.

A demure person might demur when affections are rushed.

This was a rare bit of truly erotic writing. Thank you, and I hope to see more of your work.

Who is "she"? Are you trying out a risque writing style or are you fulling eschewing character development? If you start out every sentence of every paragraph with the word "she" the narrative becomes tedious.