The Confessor Pt. 02

He looked up and saw her standing in the doorway, wearing the dress that Nadine had bought her. She gazed down at him, her face still flushed.

"Are you hungry, Samuel?" she asked with indifference. "The food has gone cold, but I can reheat it for you if you like."

Samuel returned his gaze to the floor. Then the troubled thoughts he'd been having while listening to the two of them have sex took over, and his mouth began to move on it's own.

"You didn't want to come back?" he said, sounding more like a statement of fact than a question.

"What?"

"Nadine; she said she had to make you come back."

Delilah was silent for a moment, then sighed in exasperation.

"Samuel, I was just concerned for her. She was going on a long trip alone and I wanted to be there for her. I thought she might need me."

Samuel's head rose and he looked at her with a frown on his face. The three weeks he'd spent alone in the house worrying about her flashed by his mind in an instant, and he couldn't stop the feeling if indignation welling up inside him.

"What about me, Delilah? I needed you. Did you even think about me? Do you even care about me anymore?"

"What are you talking about, Samuel?" Delilah said with an incredulous look on her face. "Of course I do?"

"Not enough to come home to me," Samuel persisted. "Not more than you care about Nadine."

"Samuel, stop that," Delilah said sharply. "I care about both of you equally."

"'Equally'?!" Samuel said, his voice growing louder as he rose off the bed and pointed towards the living room.

"Is that what you call 'Equally'?! Throwing yourself onto Nadine like that but striking me the moment I try to touch you?!"

"All right, all right," she yelled, the volume of her voice rising to match his. "I'm sorry for hitting you! But I hadn't seen her in two weeks, Samuel!"

"And for the past two weeks, you've treated me like a stranger instead of your husband! You avoid my kisses, you recoil from my touch, but the moment Nadine walks through the door you practically fall over yourself spreading your legs for her! Do you have any idea how that makes me feel, Delilah?!"

Delilah took a deep breath and then spoke to Samuel in a measured tone.

"Samuel, you and I have had plenty of time to be together, but Nadine is new to the relationship. It feels wrong to make her share me with you when you've already had me to yourself."

The look on Delilah's face suggested that she thought his anger was completely unjustified, but that only served to feed its flames.

"But I haven't had you to myself, Delilah! Nadine has! You and I haven't even had sex yet!"

"Oh, please, Samuel," she said in exasperation. "I already took care of you the other day."

"But you only did that because Nadine told you to!"

"It was my choice!" she snapped. "I didn't have to do anything at all with you if I didn't want to!"

Then she folded her arms defensively and looked away from him.

"Besides, a relationship is about more than just sex, Samuel," she spat.

Samuel clenched his teeth as his frustration threatened to overwhelm him.

"Why is the sex only unimportant when I'm the one who wants it, Delilah?! That's the only thing the two of you have been doing together, isn't it?!"

"THAT'S ENOUGH!" she yelled with a sudden fierceness that almost made him flinch. "Don't talk like that about us! You have no idea what we mean to each other!"

"What about us!" he yelled in desperation. "What about what we mean to each other?! We're married, Delilah. Isn't that more important?!"

Delilah rolled her eyes.

"Oh, stop it, Samuel! You cling to me too much! You forget that we belong to the Goddess before we belong to each other. You must yield me to Her! She wants the three of us to be together!"

"How do you know that, Delilah?!"

"She spoke to me!" she said matter-of-factly. "During the ritual! This is all apart of Her plan, Samuel!"

Religious fervor had begun to creep into Delilah's voice, and her eyes were filled with the self-righteousness of someone certain they were right. The more they argued, the more he felt like she wasn't listening. And now that she had invoked the Goddess, he knew that she was even more unlikely to. But he pressed on out of desperation.

"Is it part of Her plan to have me sleep in the spare room while you and Nadine make love in our bed?! Is that what you want, Delilah?! Is that why you married me?!"

"STOP THIS, SAMUEL!" she roared as she balled her hands into tight fists.

She stood there trembling for a moment, but then she suddenly calmed herself and her expression went blank as she looked at him.

"It is the Goddess's will, Samuel," she said, her voice once again taking on a measured tone. "You must yield to the Goddess."

"How can I yield something that I don't even feel like I have any more?!"

"It is the Goddess's will, Samuel. You must yield to the Goddess," she repeated.

"That doesn't even make any sense, Delilah?!"

"It is the Goddess'S will, Samuel. You must yield to the Goddess," she said again, and her calm insistence finally caused Samuel to lose what little self-control he had left.

"WOULD YOU STOP SAYING THAT AND TALK TO ME, DELILAH?! WHAT IS THE POINT OF BEING MARRIED IF YOU WON'T EVEN TALK TO ME!?!"

"SHUT! UP!" she yelled, practically stamping her foot in anger. "YOU FOOLISH, LITTLE MAN! YOU'RE THE ONE WHO DOESN'T UNDERSTAND THE POINT OF MARRIAGE!"

Samuel flinched this time. The fury in Delilah's eyes as she glared at him caused a chill to run through his body. But he didn't have time to respond; it was like a damn had burst inside her, and she continued to yell at him.

"FOR FUCK'S SAKE, YOU'VE ALWAYS BEEN LIKE THIS, SAMUEL! DESPITE MY BEST EFFORTS, YOU'VE NEVER REALLY YIELDED TO THE GODDESS! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MUCH I'VE PRAYED FOR YOU?!"

He'd prayed, too. He'd begged to have her come home to him. He waited for her as faithfully as she waited on the Goddess, but now she was yelling and cursing at him like she couldn't stand the sight of him. Is this what he'd prayed for?

"THANK THE GODDESS I MET NADINE! FINALLY, I CAN BE WITH SOMEONE WHO LOVES THE GODDESS AS MUCH AS I DO!"

He heard relief mixed in with her rage as she mentioned Nadine's name. The woman she wanted to share her bed with instead of him. The woman she yielded to so willingly.

"IF IT WASN'T FOR HER, I MIGHT NEVER HAVE REALIZED JUST HOW DIFFERENT YOU AND I ARE. I CAN'T IMAGINE WHAT IT WOULD HAVE BEEN LIKE TO BE ALONE WITH YOU FOR THE REST OF MY FUCKING LIFE!"

Her words hit him like a physical blow, and his eyes drifted to the floor.

Delilah stood there breathing heavily for a moment, before rubbing her forehead and collecting herself.

"I'm sorry, Samuel... I said too much," she said after she'd calmed herself. "But this is actually a good opportunity for us. It was my idea to have Nadine go to you while you stayed in the guest room, but I've changed my mind; you obviously need some time to yourself."

Was this the Goddess's mercy? Was this Her plan? For him to stand by and watch will his wife slowly became someone he didn't recognize? Someone who didn't even seem to love him any more?

"You should focus on reacquainting yourself with the Goddess and receiving Her forgiveness. I'm not comfortable with you being a part of this relationship if you're going to keep acting like this."

Is this what it meant to yield to the Goddess? To give up everything, even the things you want the most? Is this how his life was going to be from now on? Is this what it meant to receive the Goddess's love? Samuel felt dark thoughts emerging from the corners of his mind as he spoke.

"...And I'm just supposed to accept that?" he asked bitterly.

Fire returned to Delilah's voice at his defiance.

"IT IS THE GODDESS'S WILL, SAMUEL!!"

And then, something deep within him, something that had been growing ever since the wedding consultation, something that probably had always been there at the back of his mind, came bursting forth in one violent moment.

"FUCK THE GODDESS!!" he bellowed.

...

...

...

Silence.

Delilah's eyes went wide in shock as she slowly brought her hands up to cover her mouth. But she didn't finish the movement. In an instant, she ran out of the room and left Samuel standing there in mute surprise as he felt the blood drain from his body.

What had he done? How could he have let himself say such a thing? How could he let himself commit the one sin that could not be forgiven?

He felt himself begin to tremble slightly as the full weight of what he'd done struck him. It was all over. Delilah was probably running to the church at that very moment to report his crime to the priestesses. It would only be a matter of time before the Church's enforcers came for him, and there was no telling what would happen to him once they did.

His mind had begun entertaining various worst-case scenarios when he noticed the sound of Delilah's hurried footsteps moving about the house. To his surprise, she hadn't left. Instead, it sounded like she was moving from room to room closing all the windows in the house and drawing the curtains.

After about a minute, she returned to the bedroom and shot him a glare before walking over to the already closed window. She peered out of it cautiously for a few moments, biting her fingernails in worry, before tightly drawing the curtains. Then she wheeled on him and began frantically shouting in a loud whisper.

"What the fuck is wrong with you, Samuel?!" she hissed. "Have you lost your fucking mind?! What if someone heard you?!"

Samuel didn't respond. He was still in shock at what he had just done. But Delilah didn't bother waiting for him to recover as she continued to tear into him.

"What?! Is it jealousy?! Is that why you're acting like this?! You want me to fuck you like I fuck Nadine, is that it?! Fine! I'll fuck you! Are you happy now?!"

Delilah walked over to him and roughly began undoing his pants as she continued to berate him under her breath.

"It's not like you're going to be able to enjoy me like she does anyway! You're probably just going to cum as soon as I start doing anything."

Her aggressiveness caused her to fumble with his zipper, but when she finally got it open she knelt in front of him and began freeing his member from his underwear. However, Samuel's gaze didn't follow her down; he continued to stare at the wall as if he wasn't even paying attention to her.

"I can't believe how selfish you're being. Nadine misses out on so much because she's a Confessor, and she's done so much for us already. I just wanted her to have something to herself, but you want to take that away from her too? Just to satisfy your fragile ego? By the Goddess, Nadine was right; men really are unbelievably petty."

Delilah had his flaccid member in her hand now. He could feel the warmth of her open mouth drawing near. But just as it was about to envelop him, he said something that brought her to a complete stop.

"...You left me alone," he whispered, his voice hollow and lifeless.

He felt Delilah stiffen and go silent.

"What did you say?" she asked, the hostility gone from her voice.

"After the wedding consultation.," Samuel continued woodenly. "You ran back into that woman's arms, and, for three weeks, you left me alone."

"Samuel... We told you already. That was—"

"I was so worried,Delilah. I couldn't eat. I couldn't sleep. I nearly went mad wondering where you were and what you were doing. Then, when you finally come back, you tell me that you've fallen in love with someone else and kick me out of our bedroom?"

"Samuel, that's not what—"

"You said the same thing to me at the wedding consultation, remember? 'You left me alone'. Like I abandoned you. Like I didn't care about you. But I was obeying the Church, Delilah. I was afraid of what would happen to us, what would happen to you, if I gave in to my temptations. I was doing my best to be a good husband to you. To protect my wife."

Samuel finally lowered his eyes to look at her, but he only held her gaze for a moment before she quickly looked away.

"But what was your excuse, Delilah?" he asked. "Why did you leave me alone in this house to spend three weeks with Nadine? Was it to protect me? Was it to be a better wife to me? Is there anything left of the woman I married three months ago?"

Delilah's hand's balled up into fists.

"Samuel, I—"

"Why do you get to yell at me? Why do you get to say those horrible things? Why are you treating me like I'm just getting in the way of your new relationship. Why did you even come back to me if you're so much happier with her?"

Delilah looked to be on the verge of tears as she looked up at him.

"Samuel..."

"You left me alone, Delilah. You left me alone, and you never came back."

He stepped away from her, moving stiffly as he pulled up his pants and stumbled out of the room.

"Samuel? Samuel wait. Where are you going?"

Samuel walked through the living room and grabbed his keys off the kitchen counter as Delilah continued to call him from the bedroom.

"Samuel? Samuel, please come back!"

He opened the front door and left the house that no longer felt like a home.

"Samuel? Samuel, are you there?! Samuel?!... SAMUEL!?!"

***

Samuel drove aimlessly for an hour, feeling a surge of panic every time a police car passed by him or he saw a priestess walking down the street. He was still worried that Delilah might report him to the Church, so he pulled into an alley between two buildings and killed the engine.

And then he sat in silence.

How did everything become like this? It was only three months ago that he had married his high school sweetheart, but in just those three months everything in his world had turned upside down. Delilah was no longer the woman he had fallen in love with. His place in her heart had been given to someone else. And it was all because of one person.

Nadine.

Samuel started punching the dashboard of the car in frustration at how stupid he had been to believe her words. He only belatedly realized that he had allowed her to take his virginity just as he had allowed her to take Delilah's. The memory of her soft body as she wrapped herself around him caused his stomach to turn, and he felt a strong desire to bathe himself.

When the sudden fire that fueled his outburst left him, he leaned forward and rested his head on the steering wheel. What was he supposed to do now? Where was he supposed to go? What kind of life was waiting for him when the sun came up in the morning? He closed his eyes as he tried to find answers to these questions, but his thoughts were just a jumble of regrets and nightmare scenarios that replayed themselves over and over. He struggled to get control of his mind, but then the sound of his phone's message notification blaring brought him out of his reverie.

Samuel leaned back in his seat groggily. To his surprise, he had somehow managed to fall asleep without even noticing it. He pulled out his phone and found that three hours had passed since he'd parked the car in the alley, and in that time Delilah had sent him an avalanche of phone calls and messages starting from a little over an hour after he'd left.

He went through them, listening to voice messages and reading texts at random. In all of them, she was asking him where he was, and pleading with him to come home. They seemed to become more and more desperate in tone as she sent them, but there was a long one hour gap where she didn't send anything at all. The last message she'd sent, the one that had woken him up, was decidedly more measured and calm, and read like she'd had time to thinks things over:

Samuel, I've loved you ever since the day I met you. Everything from the way you blushed when you first asked me out to the way you looked into my eyes when you asked me to marry you. You were, and still are everything I've wanted, everything I've ever hoped for in another person. I'm sorry if the things I've done have caused you to doubt that. If you'll let me, if you'll give me one last chance, I will show you just how much you mean to me. Please, Samuel, come back to me. Don't let this be the end of us. I love you always. — Delilah

Samuel put down the phone and stared up at the roof of the car. He felt tears welling up in his eyes and he blinked them away as he swallowed against a lump rising in his throat. They were the words he'd wanted her to say, but he didn't know if he could trust them after everything she'd done.

He wanted to trust her, though. What he wanted more than anything in that moment was for everything to go back to normal, and there was no hope for that as long as he stayed in that alley. There was no hope for anything if he didn't return home to his wife.

He started the car and pulled out of the alley, sending a short message to Delilah that he was on his way back as he did so. And although he could see that she had read the message, she never replied.

***

When Samuel pulled into the driveway, he saw that all the lights in the house were off, and the windows were closed with the curtains drawn just as Delilah had left them. Thinking that she had gone to sleep, he entered the house quietly. There was no point waking her up at that moment; their talk could wait until morning.

After he took his shoes off at the front door, he began making his way into the dark house when someone slammed into the side of his body and pinned him hard against the wall.

The impact was so fierce that he saw tiny specks of light dancing before his eyes for a moment. Before he had time to process what was happening, his assailant reached down to his groin and took a firm hold on his member. At that moment, he felt a pain so intense that he nearly screamed in agony as it felt like something deep inside him had been forcibly pinched shut.

"No, Nadine! Don't hurt him!" he heard Delilah cry from somewhere in the darkness.

The light came on and Delilah rushed over to him.

"Samuel?! Samuel are you okay?!"

Samuel had collapsed onto the floor and was lying in the fetal position gasping for air. The sharp pain he had felt a moment earlier had subsided, but in its place was a slow, throbbing ache. As far as he could tell, his member was still fully intact, but he couldn't shake the distinct feeling that something important was missing.

When he looked up, he saw Nadine glaring down at him wearing the same white robes he'd seen that night at the church.

"Nadine! Nadine, what did you do?! What's wrong with him?!" Delilah cried, looking distraught as she fretted over him.

Nadine leaned down, taking Delilah by her wrist, and pulled her away from Samuel before placing herself between them.

"Nadine! What are you—" Delilah began to protest, but stopped short when Nadine shot her a look over her shoulder. Then she went silent.

Nadine returned her ominous gaze to Samuel as he lay curled up on the ground.

"You cursed the Goddess?" she asked, her voice dark and full of threat.

Samuel struggled to push himself up off the ground but his body refused to cooperate. It was like he had been sapped of every ounce of strength he had. He couldn't even muster the strength to come up with a feeble excuse to defend himself.

"I should take you to the church; let the enforcers deal with you," she said darkly. "If it wasn't for Delilah, I..."

She let her sentence go unfinished, and he could see a zealous rage burning in her eyes as she looked down at him.

"I thought you understood, Samuel. I thought you saw your place in the Goddess's plan for us. But obviously, I was wrong."

Nadine suddenly took him by his collar and began dragging him to the bedroom. Her strength stunned him. She was pulling him behind her like he weighed nothing at all, and he started choking as his shirt dug into his throat. Delilah followed after them, still pleading with Nadine.