The Demonization of Humberstone Rd.

I'm Delilah, by the way. I don't flatter myself that you are reading this introduction before having turned to my centerfold. Glorious, aren't I? I don't think I've ever felt sexier than when I was posing for that photo shoot. That's not pride, by the way. It's all God's handiwork. I've just made sure to look after my temple.

We have a philosophy at DoE, or maybe even a theology. Sex between two devoted monogamous people is a wonderful thing and sharing our love visually is a way of helping the community. That's my husband Samson in the risquér photographs by the way. He's the only man I've ever known or ever will know and he's all I want. When you look at our photo shoot, you should see a model to emulate, not a romp to join in.

Look at the way he looks at me and the way I look back at him. I think the photographer really captured the love we feel for each other in some of those shots. Much better than some snarling, lascivious demon surely. And see that photo on page 33, the one where Glorithornacca, that's our angelic companion, is tilting Samson's head up to look back at me. That's just play-acting by the way, Samson couldn't have kept his eyes off me in that session if he'd wanted to, but it tells the right story. Angels are here to make sure we stay focused on the one we love. An extra hand to caress, a whispered suggestion for expressing our desires, a finger tracing the beauty of our lover's body for us -- these are little things, but they can all help us stay faithful to each other.

We're taught that sex is for the purpose of procreation only. Well, it's 2003 and every woman in the country is fully immersed in a natural, beautiful, and never-ending circle of life. so I'd say that's mission accomplished. Worried about spreading your seed on stoney ground? Take a look at my belly. I'd say that's a pretty fertile patch of land. Five months along, by the way. Maintaining a healthy sexual relationship with your husband during a pregnancy is part of creating the perfect family and it's nothing to be worried about.

Even before we'd printed our first copy, some in the media were attacking us for being overly pious and politically regressive. That's unfair. I don't deny I want to be a traditional wife. After all, it's impossible to be a career woman these days when you legally need to be on maternity leave 52 weeks each and every year. A woman can fight how the world is, or she can devote herself to making the best possible home for her husband and her ever-increasing flock of little blessings.

Give a man that and his will have no need to stray into the dens of sin hosted by lustful demons. I'll put it as simply as I can for you. What's better? A blowjob? Or a blowjob and a slice of home-made apple pie?

Yes, I thought so.

I hope you enjoy our magazine,

Delilah, 1st Daughter of Eve.

11th February 2003

Dear PlayDemon Magazine,

I never thought I'd get to watch as my wife cuckolded me with a Minotaur demon!

And I never thought I'd love it so much!

My wife and I have been married for fifteen years, and have two lovely boys -- eleven and thirteen. We thought that was it, but, truth be told, I'd always wanted a girl, so when we got the letter telling us we needed to do our bit to keep the population balanced, I couldn't have been happier.

The problem was that neither of us is as young as we once were, and our sex life isn't all it could be. And hadn't been for many years, if we're honest. All that was about to change!

We'd been avid readers of your magazine since it started publishing six months ago. We've got every issue! Becky, that's my wife, looks at it as well. Personally, I think she might be a little bi-sexual, however much she swears she's just interested in understanding demon physiology.

Once we started to be officially required to do it every night, PlayDemon was a complete Godsend. (Sorry, that's probably the wrong word). Anyway, it certainly helped get my motor running. The She-Devils of the Month? Man, those femme fatales are something else! I like the girls with the blood red skin and eyes to match myself, like Miss October. What can I say, I'm a simple man, but with boobs like Evillapena's, who needs to be complicated! Becky, on the other hand, is nuts about that alabaster skin, that snakey hair, and those black eyes that go on to infinity. Yeah, who is she kidding, she's got the Hell-sweating Fever for sure! She was horny all the way through December and we can all guess the reason why! [Editor: Revellevera was our She-Devil of the month for December for those readers who missed it. Back issues still available - see page 67.]

So with PlayDemon's help, we were having a time like we'd never had since our honeymoon, but still nothing doing. We'd got a couple of visits from the Natal Enforcement Officer. Nothing unpleasant, just a 'How are you getting on?' and a 'Did you need any help?' We said, 'No, we got this' but as the months went by, it increasingly looked like we didn't got this.

We had some conversations about turning to a Lust Demon ourselves and we started to look through some of the adverts at the back of your magazine, just, you know, discussing what if. I naturally thought we'd be getting ourselves a steaming hot hell vixen, but then one night Becky turned to me and said, "You know what? It doesn't have to be a girl demon."

I was confused. "What do you mean?" I asked.

She looked deep into my eyes and told me, "I think the reason I'm not getting pregnant, is because I'm not orgasming during sex."

This was news to me. "What do you mean? You come every single night!"

She took my hand and patted it gently. "I've got a confession to make," she said. "I've been faking it. I just didn't want to hurt your feelings and..."

Her voice trailed off, but I'd got the message. It hurt. Of course, it did. "You mean?" I asked.

"Yes, you're just not big enough for me...down there."

And with that, she reached into her handbag and pulled out a copy of DemonDude magazine [Editor: that's our sister magazine, or should I say brother?] She opened it up at the centerfold.

If you think about it, there's no point in being defensive. I'm not as big as a minotaur demon, no human guy is, so why get a fragile ego over it? The thing this hellspawn was packing was as long as my arm. It even had fingers halfway down that could tickle her G-spot even as it was ripping a hole straight into her womb.

"There's no way you can take all that," I told her.

"I think..." she started, and then she paused to wipe a little tear away from her eye. "I think I'd like to try."

I couldn't say I was happy, but with the threat of prison looming for both of us if Becky didn't get in the family way soon, what could I do?

Now, I don't want you to think Becky is easy or anything. We didn't rush into anything, even with a deadline circled in our diaries. We met three different demons and none of them felt quite right. With the second one, there came a moment when Becky pulled me aside and siad, "I think, maybe?" and I just replied, "If it's only a maybe, it's really a no, isn't it?"

She gave me a big hug and said, "You're right."

Then we met Drugrilder -- a total class act. We hit it off straight away. He had a wicked sense of humour and a relaxed devil-may-care attitude. Totally put us at our ease. We had a few drinks and about an hour in, he snuck Becky into the gents and showed her what he was packing. When she came out, she didn't need to say anything. I knew from the shell-shocked look on her face that it was on.

We went back home. We'd done a research, so instead of offering Drugrilder a bottle of beer, we offered him a whole keg instead, with a jar of lamb's blood as a chaser. Then, as Becky went to change into something more comfortable, I chatted with him about his role in the French Revolution and subsequent Terror. "No one fucks like a French aristo who knows she's going to get the guillotine in the morning," he told me. Then, as we were both laughing, he remembered himself. "But I'm sure you're wife will be good as well."

Becky wasn't just good, she was an absolute trooper. She called us into the bedroom and she was lying on top of the sheets in this little white number, all lace and garters. She must have gotten it mail-order when I was at work, because it was a surprise to me as well.

Drugrilder took one look at her and said, "I've seen ladies from every nation in the world from Mesopotamia to Montenegro, so you'd better believe me when I say, you've got it going on!"

Becky laughed and replied, "I bet you say that to all the girls."

When Drugrilder just gave her a wink, Becky just opened her legs and let him see a fraction of her sex. Immediately Drugrilder's eyes changed and a fog seemed to come over him.

"I'm going to pound your little bitch cunt so hard, you'll never be able to feel your husband's shrimp-ass dick ever again."

Becky has never been one for dirty talk, but this somehow just made her close her eyes and moan, almost as if she was coming just from his voice. Later she told me it was a combination of the deepness and resonance that set her off. Her legs squirmed together against the sheets.

I sensed that we weren't far from kicking things off properly, so I went to grab the video camera. We'd agreed that we were going to record the event. Not only would it record the moment for posterity, but it would also give me something to do in case I felt left out.

For a moment, I thought Drugilder was going to just pounce on Becky. I almost thought that he was going to rip her to shreds there and then. Instead, he seemed to snap out of it.

"Consent is important," he simply said.

"Yes," I replied. "We talked about that."

"We did," he agreed. "But I'm going to ask for you to confirm again. You want my help in getting Becky pregnant?"

"We do," Becky said quickly.

"You are fully aware that demons don't produce sperm? I won't be fathering a child with your wife."

"Yes, we know," I said. "You're just here to help matters along."

"Indeed," said the demon, licking his lips. "But you also know that when a Lust Demon starts to have sex, it can be dangerous to stop them. Therefore, if you feel uncomfortable during intercourse, you can ask me to stop, but you'll have to make sure I ejaculate in some other way, otherwise, there's no telling what I might do."

"Yes, yes," said Becky impatiently. We'd gone through this. Colleen from next door was to be our emergency contact. She'd already been with two different demons and, I'm pretty sure, had been instrumental in talking Becky up to doing this. Becky was pretty confident that Colleen wouldn't be needed, but we had her on speed dial, just in case.

"In which case, the safeword is Mephistopheles," said Drugrilder, and with that he pulled down his size sixty trousers and let his cock spring forward.

We'd watched a lot of demon porn together, but still I'd never seen anything like Drugrilder's penis. At first, I thought it was small, barely bigger than my own, but then it started to grow. It thickened barely at all, but it lengthened to one and then two feet. As it expanded it split, a second, then a third helmet appeared along its length forming three point of a triangle.

Each of the three cocks was noticeably different in size, shape, and skin colour. One was white and thick ending in a round purple helmet, one was darker skinned and longer but not so wide, and a third was somewhere in between.

Becky was naturally curious. She reached out and touched each cock at it's head.

No sooner had she done this than a few inches back along the tree-branch stem, a new set of cocks started to grow out. This time a ring of five cocks encircled the original three. Each again was unique. The smallest maintained only a couple of inches of human skin colour before fading into the red of Drugrilder's stem. The largest must have been more like nine and remained the same shade from root to tip.

Now, Drugrilder dropped his trousers and underwear completely and we could see his massive testicles. Instead of two he had must have had thirty -- all human-sized but held together in a patchwork ball-sack of many colours. It hung between his legs like a massive wrinkled cushion.

Even as we both stared, more dicks started to grow, seven in yet a third concentric circle.

"Pick one and we will get started," Drugrilder said to my wife.

She made a great show of choosing, inspecting them all one by one, but I knew she was always going to go for the largest one. As she tapped it on the helmet with her finger, the other fourteen cocks started to shrink back into the main trunk. The lucky member straightened out as its companions disappeared. It was large enough just on its own but there was still an extra four red inches at its base.

No doubt, Drugrilder could have skipped foreplay altogether. Instead, he leapt on Becky with the ferocity of a police dog catching a criminal. She lay pinned beneath her as he attacked her breasts with his tongue. With the wind suddenly knocked out of her, she could do nothing but squirm.

It took me a second to remember I was supposed to be filming all this. By the time I'd gotten back behind the camera, his hand, with those great long talons was already holding her pussy lips apart. As she bucked and squirmed, I thought he was going to draw blood, but somehow he managed to hold her down without hurting her.

A second later, he had mounted her fully. He pushed his dick fully into her in one rough, quick thrust. She screamed like the possessed.

Then he was having her, riding her like a horse in the Grand National. Her breasts, arse, and legs were bouncing with the force of each stroke. Within a minute she was breathing like a woman in labour. It looked like torture, except every so often a smile would play across her face -- a smile that had traces of insanity around the edges.

The fucking never slowed, but eventually, Becky started to be able to vocalize. It started with a few simple cries of 'yes'. That slowly evolved into 'oh, hell, yes.' Soon she was able to say 'Fucking hell, fuck me harder.'

Finally, she grabbed the demon by the shoulder and looking straight into his eyes said, "I want you to fuck me harder with your great big demon dick."

I sensed somehow this was the moment that the demon had been waiting for. Somehow he had conspired to bring these words to her lips. He didn't stop, not for a second, but suddenly there was a strange calm over the scene. He looked back at her and said, as calmly as one might order the soup at an expensive restaurant, "This is not my dick."

"I don't care whose dick it is," cried Becky. "Just fuck me harder."

Becky might not have cared, but I did. "Wait! If it's not your dick, whose dick is it?"

"I don't know." Somehow the demon managed to shrug while still fucking my wife. "Some schlubbs."

"What do you mean, some schlubbs?" I cried.

"I mean I've got a ton of human dicks here. I can't be expected to keep track of who was packing what. That's Zandy's job. She collects them for me and I put them to use."

I suddenly put two and two together. "But, hang on...if that's some random guys dick, doesn't that mean Becky..."

"Can get pregnant? Well, duh, that's the whole point," said Drugrilder.

"But...but...you said that I'd be the father," I stammered.

"No," said Drugrilder. "I said I wouldn't be. Don't worry, you'll get a nice human baby - ten toes, pink skin, no horn, nothing to worry about."

He paused for a moment. "Well, not necessarily pink skin."

"This isn't right," I said. I decided things had gone far enough. "Mephistopheles."

"Yeah, no," said the demon. "You can hardly use the safeword when you're not the one getting fucked."

"Honey?" I cried desperately.

"Dear, stop...bothering the nice demon...when he's...oh fucking God yes...in the middle of things," my wife said. I'm not sure that she'd really grasped what was going on through the waves of mini-orgasms that were wracking her body every few seconds.

"But you have to..." I started, but it was no use. I could see by the way her eyes were rolling back in her head that she was beyond all reason.

I grabbed the phone and hit Colleen's number. It rang and rang and rang. Eventually, I got the dead tone. I hung up and tried again. All the time, I was watching in desperation as the demon kept riding my wife. It may not have been his own dick, but he was still experiencing waves of passion as he took her. I kept waiting for that final release, for him to cry out and fill my wife with another man's spunk, but his stamina was -- well -- very obviously not human. The phone went dead a second time and I started to panic.

(Colleen later explained that she'd thought our date was Saturday rather than Friday night and she was out at bingo. These things happen.)

"Please stop," I cried to the demon. "I'll do anything."

The instant I said these words, Drugrilder stopped. He was still deep inside my wife, but motionless for the first time in nearly half-an-hour. Becky curled her legs around the demon and let another orgasm take her, this one longer and louder somehow for being stationary. Through it all, Drugrilder and I were locked eye to eye.

Only once her moaning had subsided, did he speak. "Anything? Oh well, you should have said."

"Er, yes," I said. "Anything. Just, please, don't cum inside my wife."

"Well," said the demon. "I thought I'd made it clear. I have to cum somewhere. If not in your wife, then where do you suggest?"

I looked forlornly at the phone. "Our emergency contact, I couldn't get through to her."

The words Drugrilder spoke said, "That's too bad." His actual voice said "That's great."

Drugrilder got off my wife and stood up from the bed. Suddenly his shaft was expanding again and, where there had been one penis a moment ago, there were now fifteen once again.

"It's very simple," Drugrilder explained. "If you've changed your mind and don't want your wife impregnated, then you'll have to make sure that every single cock on my body comes somewhere else."

"Somewhere else?" I said, taking a big gulp.

"I'm not an unreasonable entity," said the demon. "Find other ways to bring me off and your wife eggs will be for your semen alone again. I mean, it seems like you're now wasting my time by even inviting me here, but we'll make the best of a bad job."

I went over and sat on the bed next to Becky. "Maybe you could..."

"Don't look at me," said Becky. "I was enjoying it. And if we call it off now, we'll just be back to square one. Why not just let us finish and see what happens?"

"Please don't," I said. "I couldn't bear it if..."

"Sorry, I know this hurts," said Becky. "But, this is the best way. I'm sure to get pregnant this way. And can you imagine how we're going to tell the N.E.O. officer we had a demon with us and kicked him out?"

"Time's wasting and I'm getting soft here," said Drugrilder, drumming his fingers against the headboard. "If I don't fuck something soon, I can't be responsible for the consequences."

"I...I'll do it," I found myself saying.

"Do what?" replied the demon. He knew. He was just playing games now.

I got down on my knees and took the dick that was attached to him in my mouth.

"There you go," he said. "That wasn't so hard."

He didn't let me get comfortable. Instead, he started fucking my mouth straight away. I thought I was going to choke and had to fight back against my throat's natural reaction to having something so large forced all the way inside it.

I'd never had a gay experience before. I'd never even thought about it. I was only doing this to save my marriage. But as I started to suck, it actually felt good. Not the physical sensations exactly, he was rough and careless with me, but the more I sucked the more I felt elated.