The Grande Futapest Hotel Ch. 05

"Oh, God..." Layla squinted involuntarily. "How much longer does this go on?"

"A long time." Selena said.

Layla put her head down in her arms. "I don't like this. I don't want to see this"

"You've never watched this at all?" Selena set the player to fast forward, and the next few minutes dashed by as Selena kept waiting for something to happen in the coffin. Even at four times playback speed, it felt like forever.

Finally, a plug was pulled by a chain at the base of the water torture chamber, and the air pocket reappeared at the top. Selena went to it, but the ball-and-chain kept her from it until the little plug drained enough that her mouth could breach the surface of the water and gasp in air.

The water drained away, and the chamber was opened, the four clear walls of the chamber splitting apart like the peel of a banana. A camera moved in close on Selena's face, with the telltale wobble of handheld videography.

"Wow." Said Selena, on the video, shivering and breathing hard. "I've never held my breath THAT long before..." She smiled weakly, holding her arms around her torso and made a quick good-bye and shout-out to the website that had released this video.

"Huh." Selena grunted. "I held it together way better than I remember. In my head, I was so angry."

"How long were you holding your breath?"

"Just under three minutes." Selena explained. "To put that into perspective, that's a feat that can be performed by synchronized swimmers. Anyway, after we left the set, I grabbed the director by the shoulders and threw him into the wall so hard, I broke the drywall. I screamed at him, asking if it was, in fact, his intention to kill me.

"The director said he heard I could hold my breath for a long time from some interview I did where I talked about how I love swimming. He wanted to push it, but he expected me to do the safe gesture and get out of it and that would be the end of the video."

"What did you say to THAT?"

"I told him he can't just spring stuff like that on me without asking me. That's like not telling someone it's an anal scene until five minutes before. He really didn't see what the big deal was. To his credit, he asked, 'do you want us to not use the footage?' I said, 'You're going to put me through that and then NOT use it? No way. You sell as much of this as you want, but I'm never doing a scene like that again.'"

A silence fell over the pair. Layla slid up from her lap and looked Selena in her eye.

"You OK?" Layla asked.

Selena took the back of Layla's head and brought her in for a kiss. "I'm great." She said. "How's the ass?"

"It feels OK." Layla shrugged. "You went easy on me."

Selena squinted disapprovingly, countered by a smile appearing on one side of her face. "Ohhh... you're going to get it next time. And you ruined this skirt."

They kissed once more. Layla wormed herself off Selena's lap, bringing her knees onto the carpet. She dipped her lips into the lake of come she'd left on Selena's skirt, hands behind her like she was bobbing for apples. Layla slurped up as much as she could fit in her mouth. She stood, sat in Selena's much cleaner lap, and emptied her mouth into Selena's.

After their tongues fought over the last sweet morsel, Selena patted Layla's rear gently. "You're being bad. I didn't ask you to do that."

"Then you're going to have to spank me again."

"Impudence." Selena sneered. "I'll have to find something for that mouth..."

"Like a bar of soap?"

Selena shook her head. "No, no. That'd be gross. I've got something else in mind." Selena worked her way off the couch, Layla standing up from Selena's lap. "But first..."

Reaching behind Layla, she gently pulled the carrot from within Layla by the green tassel. Layla gasped about as loud as the item left her as she did when it entered. She'd almost forgotten it was there.

"It's obvious which of these two were more effective."

---

Layla walked on all fours, having been freed from her impromptu plastic shackles. She was still nude, crawling behind Selena into the locked storage room. She'd explained how an online charity telethon had contacted her and asked if there was some Selena Grande memorabilia she could donate to them for this event.

Selena asked if an authentic Selena Grande-used dildo would suffice.

They were very enthusiastic about this.

Selena now stood above her plastic tub filled with marital aids like a pirate standing by their unearthed plunder.

"Which one should I give them, Layla?" Selena put her hand into the storage tub and pulled out a red vibrator with clitoral stimulating extension, about seven inches. "This one seems a bit small... and I left the batteries in, so it might not even work anymore."

She flipped the switch at the base. The device buzzed and came to live, vibrating and wobbling in the middle like a belly dancer.

"I stand corrected." She said, striding behind Layla. In one vertical move, she pressed the very tip of the vibrator against Layla's crotch, tickling her balls and barely parting the moist lips of her vulva. Layla's legs shook, and a single outstretched strand of precum reached the carpet.

"You're right, Layla." Selena said. "You love this one too much to part with it. Could you hold it for me?"

"If you put it in my pussy, I'm going to come." Layla begged breathlessly.

"From that sentence, I can't tell if you want me to or not." Selena sighed, turning off the dildo and resting it on Layla's back like a saddle. "Alright. I'll be merciful today."

Selena's hand returned to the tub. She retrieved a green semitransparent dildo with concentric ripples, like the inside of a set of pork ribs. "This one is fun, but still... too small. Don't you agree?"

Layla nodded her head. "You can't send a dildo that's much smaller than you. But nobody makes a thirteen inch dildo."

"Actually, some companies do." Selena corrected in her own voice, rather than her assumed dominatrix demeanor. "But I don't think I have one. They're more of a novelty." She tossed it back into the bin and returned her hand to it, rifling through it like drawing numbers out of a hat.

"Here we go..." Selena smiled, and withdrew a flesh-colored monstrosity, only a few inches short of Selena's own cock. It was a peachy color, with a gentle curve upward that neither hers nor Layla's possessed. "This will do nicely. I can even sign this if they like. Do you think they'll like this dildo, Layla?"

"Definitely." Layla craned her head up.

"Well... we'll have to clean it up." Selena held the dildo above Layla and lowered the tip towards Layla's mouth. "Would you be so kind?"

Once Layla's mouth opened for a response, Selena gently pressed the dildo inside. She made some moans as the firm rubber crawled down her throat until the rubber balls were against her nose.

"There we go. Clean it good, now."

Layla gagged softly as Selena dipped the dildo in and out of her throat, like rubbing clothing against a washboard. She withdrew it, a strand of spit connecting the tip and Layla's lip, a few delicate bubbles breaking as she moved her lips again.

"Beautiful. Clean as a whistle."

Layla gagged again.

"All this time, you can deep-throat beautifully..." Selena looked down at Layla. "And you never once offered to go down on me."

Layla still didn't respond. There were tears gathering in her eyes.

"Did you like the taste? The remnants of my gushing pussy--"

"Selena!" Layla finally croaked in a half-shout. "I taste soap."

"What?" Selena looked alarmed, dropping the moistened dildo to the floor. She got Layla to her feet. "Are you OK?"

"I just need a drink."

Selena hustled Layla back to the kitchen with the urgency of a mother bringing a child with a stomach bug to the bathroom. Layla insisted that she would not be throwing up in front of Selena Grande, no matter what she ate.

"I don't get why it tasted soapy." Selena rubbed Layla's shoulder. "I sterilize them in the dishwasher."

"Did you add soap when you did it?"

"Of course not. I'm not that dumb. There must have been some left over or something. Or maybe Merri filled it and I didn't check. I don't know. Are you OK?"

"I'll be fine. It just tasted bad."

"You say the word and I'll take you to somewhere to get checked out, insurance or no insurance."

"It's OK." Layla took Selena's hands and pulled her in. They kissed once, then twice.

Selena smiled. "Now blow a bubble."

Layla playfully shoved Selena away. "So that line about your gushing pussy..."

"No, I didn't ride it hard and put it away wet." Selena noted. "They were all clean."

Selena left Layla at the sink only long enough to summon a box of Wheat Thins to continue the campaign of ridding her mouth of the harsh soapy taste.

The Wheat Thins were stale.

"Oh, my God, I'm so bad at this!" Selena cried, clenching her fist.

---

Having failed to demonstrate that she could be an effective dominatrix, Selena allowed Layla to get dressed. Not everything had to revolve around sex. Just most things.

Selena found an old shipping box in which the donated dildo would fit. She removed the sticker which bore her address and printed up a shipping label to attach to the box.

"Wow, it printed right on the first try." Selena marveled. "See, the printer is behaving itself because I have company over. Printers, right? I seem to remember you talking about them, but I don't remember when."

"It was on stream the other night."

"Oh, yeah..." Selena peeled the sticker off the back of the paper and slid it against the wide part of the box, keeping any wrinkles or air bubbles from forming. She also got Layla to print a copy of the letter she had drafted.

Selena read it once more, checking for any spelling errors the spellcheck wouldn't catch, like a typo that accidentally formed a word that recognized by the dictionary. She didn't find any, and promptly folded the letter perfectly into thirds.

Over her shoulder, Selena caught a glimpse of Layla's gentle look of concern. "What's on your mind?" Selena asked.

Layla inhaled, but didn't say anything.

"It's all right, Layla. Go ahead." She encouraged.

Layla puffed up with air, and let it all go. "Are you sure you want to send that letter?"

"Well, I'm going to the post office anyway."

"You can drop that letter in any mailbox on any street corner and it will get there." Layla said, sharper than she meant. She dialed it back a bit. "So... what's the rush?"

Selena turned back to the folded letter in her hands. She unfolded it and read it again. She closed her eyes and folded it again, setting it down on the desk. "Yeah, I'll sleep on it."

They started the walk to the garage, the parcel under Layla's arm. Layla hoped she hadn't gone too far.

"I really like having you around, Layla." Selena said, almost as if to contradict Layla's worries. "You're like the angel on my shoulder."

"I don't think I'm that nice..." Layla said.

"No, I know you are, because your jizz is sweet." Selena said. "That's how I can tell for sure."

"I've never heard that." Layla piled into the passenger's seat. "Are you sure about that?"

"Well, whenever I meet a futa friend, I talk to them and see if they're nice. If they are, and we become friends, I'll inevitably suck them off at some point, and... yeah, so far, they've all been sweet. None quite as lovely as yours, of course."

Layla moved the parcel to between her legs to hide something. Selena looked at it and just snickered.

---

There was a line at the post office. Layla suggested this was exactly the sort of thing an assistant could help with. Selena doubted she'd be doing anything that productive at home except edging, which she obviously wouldn't do here. Not that she'd be the first person to do that when in line at the post office.

Selena was grateful the people auctioning the authentic Selena Grande-used dildo lived in America. The shipping costs meant nothing to her, but filling out a custom form was always an interesting challenge, wondering if she would encounter the snooty postal worker who didn't want her to write 'dildo' on a government form. There was also the chance of getting the opposite reaction, one who would say "sex toy" or "marital aid" was not specific enough for the form.

One man in line stepped forward to ask if she was Selena Grande. She affirmed this, and they took a selfie on his phone. He went back to his place in line, everyone in line polite enough to allow him to re-enter where he had left.

The woman behind him asked, "Who IS that?"

The man suddenly looked as though he had to explain the giant stack of Playboys in the corner of his room.

Selena came to his rescue. "Have you ever seen Modern Family?" She asked the woman.

She shook her head no.

The gamble had paid off. "Then you wouldn't know who I am."

Thankfully, the woman didn't ask for a picture anyway. What a rude awakening she might be in for if she posted THAT to Facebook.

---

"You ever get recognized?" Selena asked Layla during the drive home.

"In public?" Layla folded her hand in her lap. "Once or twice. My stream isn't very popular, but... it's not like I'm in disguise. One dude recognized me and asked to see my cock, and I said, 'show me yours' as a joke. And then he actually did it. I was joking, but I can't blame him for doing it when I asked him to."

A pause. "Well...?" Selena looked across the car at her expectantly.

"Yeah, I did it. I was pretty embarrassed, whipping it out in public. But not as embarrassed as him when he realized I was twice as big as him."

Selena snickered.

Layla continued, "Like, I don't get how he didn't know! He's obviously seen my stream."

A few minutes of placid driving. Layla came up with another question for her.

"Did you ever work with that bondage crew again?"

"Yes, but not as a sub, and not water torture." Selena answered. "I did a few as my pathetic attempt as a dominatrix. It was still loads of fun. Especially since I got to do whatever I wanted. Despite the fact that I totally committed battery on that guy after he nearly killed me, we patched it up and I've been back a few times."

"Have you ever... had to break ties with someone professionally?"

Selena thought for a bit. "Only once."

"What happened? If you're comfortable sharing that, of course."

"I won't name who it was, but it was a younger futa star. We filmed together, and she later went on the news to say that she was fired from a teaching job because of her appearance in our movie. But she claimed she had a degree in elementary education. I was immediately suspicious because... I had just turned twenty-one. As you must be gathering, there doesn't seem to be any futa porn star that's older than me. That meant she got a degree in elementary education in two and a half years."

"That's not impossible." Layla noted.

"No, it's not, but nothing else in her story checked out. She never named the school where she worked OR the university where she taught. She always dodged answering it. But sales of the DVD doubled for... maybe the week this controversy held anyone's interest. They never admitted to it, but it was clear this was a publicity stunt.

"I confronted her and the director together. I told them that what they did was wrong, that dragging me into this was absolutely unacceptable, and that I would never work with them again."

"Did you?"

"Never." Selena said. "They responded to this by saying I was washed up and I'd be out of the industry in a year."

"What happened to them?"

"I sort of wish I didn't know, but... one night, curiosity got the better of me. The director left the industry about the time when he thought I would, and the actress..."

Selena paused.

"She is now an escort. Or she was, as of two years ago."

"So she didn't go back into teaching." Layla said.

A smile appeared on Selena's lips, despite shaking her head in disapproval. "No. Evidently not."

A few blocks flew by the windows before Selena spoke again. "You ever do that? Google your exes? See what they're up to?"

Layla felt a thin sliver of fear enter her heart at the inquiry. She tried to stay calm. "Exes, no. Crushes... yes."

"Swear it off now, while you're still young." Selena said. "Like smoking. The older you get, the more the social media of your friends look like highlight reels. There's no reason to torture yourself over it for people you don't know anymore, be they friends or enemies. I mean, I'm very successful, but if those two found out that I hate-Googled them... they'd probably think that was some small victory over me. That I hadn't completely left it behind. And I have. I'm just telling you the story because I hope you can avoid making that mistake."

At the end of the journey home, Selena took a brief detour to stop to a grocery store. Layla put a bottled water in among Selena's items, since it would be the ninth of the allowed ten items. It was the self-checkout, but rules were rules. By the time they got home, it was 4:30, and Selena suggested that 5:00 would be a perfect time for dinner. Sadly, the oven had to preheat, so dinner came closer to 5:30. She wished for an app on her phone that could remotely turn on her oven when she was gone... but then remembered her mother's habit of hanging damp dish towels inside the still-warm oven to dry them.

Once the oven timer beeped, Selena removed two identical ceramic casseroles from the oven, with half a game hen resting on a bed of carrots, potatoes, yellow onion, celery and broccoli.

It smelled amazing. Layla's stomach knotted and growled at the smell. She took a seat at the kitchen island as Selena took out three plates. One plate held the chicken while she poured the vegetables into the other two before plating the chicken atop the vegetables.

Layla picked up her utensils, but Selena waved her hand.

"What, are we going to say Grace?" Layla asked.

"No, you're supposed to let the chicken rest for five minutes."

Layla set down her utensils. "What do we do for five minutes?"

Six minutes of French kissing followed, with Selena pinning Layla to the fridge, knocking a few magnets from it as she groped Layla's balls through her tights. If the smell from the chicken wasn't making them salivate before... they certainly were now.

Sitting across from each other, Layla and Selena picked up their forks and knives. Selena tucked in, but Layla hesitated, seeing the chopped carrot among the vegetables.

"What's wrong?" Selena asked, taking another bite immediately after.

Layla brought her fork up with a carrot slice in the tines. "Selena, this isn't...THE carrot, is it?"

Selena played coy. "It's a carrot." She said, emphasizing the 'A.'

Layla set the fork down. "Selena, I'm not eating a carrot that was in my ass. That's a hard no."

Unperturbed, Selena reached across the counter, bringing her fork above Layla's plate and stabbing a carrot slice with her fork. She brought it back and ate it expressionlessly.

"That doesn't necessarily prove anything." Layla reasoned. "I've seen Nil by Ass to Mouth 2."

Selena looked at her a little funny. "My chef made these yesterday, remember? I was on the phone at your place."

Layla's face softened. "Oh, yeah."

"And besides... I would never do that to you as a prank." Selena said. "I hate pranks like that."

Satisfied, Layla started eating. She speared a coin-shaped slice of carrot in the fork and bit it. The carrot was soft and perfectly cooked, but she still heard a snap and crunch of uncooked carrot.

Layla looked up. Selena had bitten into the end of an unpeeled carrot, the greens still attached to the root.

Selena looked back, chewing the carrot. "What?" She asked innocently. "What's up..."

A smile crept onto one side of Selena's face.

"Doc?" She said finally, face contorting to resist laughing.