The Incubus's Heart Ch. 09

Josh cut her off with a finger over her lips. "Seneca, it's okay. We can go. It obviously makes you uncomfortable, but your apartment's fine, there's nothing wrong with it and neither of us are judging you."

"Josh..."

He reached out, catching her cheek with his other hand, forcing her to look at him. "Seneca, I promise it's fine. Can I..." He trailed off, his finger running over her lips. "Can I kiss you? It's just, I never realized this, but I haven't kissed you since this started. All this, you know, with Godwin. Am I not allowed?"

"Ah...I..." His fingers trailed over her lips and she suddenly, very much wanted to kiss him. Was it bad of her to want to feel good, to stop thinking, even if it was just for a few minutes? Godwin told her not to be ashamed of her desires, so she wouldn't be. "He tells me what to do when we play, but we aren't playing."

She leaned up on her tiptoes, then brushed her lips over his. He froze, his fingers tense against her cheeks. "Seneca, are you sure?" he whispered. "I don't wanna do anything that would make you uncomfortable."

"You're sweet, Josh. I want this. Is that okay?"

"It's more than okay, I just want to make sure you do, too..."

She nodded. "I do." She whispered, then pressed her lips firmly against his. He froze, then relaxed and gently kissed kissed. He started slow, letting her lead, warm and receptive.

His hand moved to the back of her head, threading through her hair, pulling her closer. She wrapped her arms around his back, pressing their bodies together.

His kisses slowly deepened, but he still kissed her sweet and slow. She kept her bad arm wrapped around his torso but allowed her good arm to trail down his back. It landed on his shapely ass and she grabbed it, squeezing down. He grunted in her mouth, then bit down on her lip gently, a playful reprimand.

"You're a good kisser," he said, breaking away for breath.

She smiled, licking her lips. "I've had a good teacher," she replied, thinking of the delicious vanilla flavored kisses she shared with Godwin. She moved him to the couch, steering him around the cluttered coffee table. He sat down with a thump, pulling her down on top of him.

"I can tell," he replied, his smile playful. "Proper. I approve, not that you need my approval." He smiled again and she loved it, his playful smile. She leaned in, wrapping her arms around his neck, then closed her eyes, she focused on her hunger, pulling it closer to the surface.

Josh grabbed her butt and pulled her over his growing erection. That little motion pushed her over the edge and her eye teeth dropped. She opened her eyes and smiled so that her fangs would be prominent.

Josh moaned. "Your eyes, Sen. Fuck, you're so freaking sexy," he murmured, squeezing her ass as he pulled her hips over his lap. "What are you gonna do to me?"

"Josh," she whispered, shifting her hips on his lap. "What do you want me to do to you?"

"Anything, Seneca. Anything you want."

She nuzzled his neck and he moaned deep in his throat. She kissed him there, then moved back to his mouth. His kisses grew more passionate, then he pulled back and traced her fangs with his tongue. She bit down carefully, drawing a single drop of blood.

"Mmm, Seneca," he moaned as she pulled away. "Bite me, please..."

It was hot, how much he wanted her bite. She pulled his head to the side and planted her fangs into his neck.

Josh groaned, pulling her down by her hips, grinding her against his bulge. She sucked hard and growled deep in his throat, his head rolling to the side, giving her better access. She bit down again and his hips jumped in response.

A noise behind her had them both freeze, her mid-bite, her fangs still half buried in Josh's neck, Josh's hands grabbing in her ass.

"Please, mind me not at all," Godwin said.

She pulled away from Josh, jumping up so quickly she tripped over the coffee table and fell, then caught herself before she hit the floor. Somehow her body rolled the right way and she didn't fall on her injured arm.

A surge of guilt felt like a punch to the stomach, the thought that she had somehow betrayed Godwin filled her mind, flooding out all other thoughts. She was too afraid to say anything at all, wishing she could sink into the floor and disappear.

"Godwin?" Josh asked from the couch, still half dazed from her bite, hand was over his throat. She saw he was still bleeding, increasing her guilt.

"Godwin, I'm-" she started.

He didn't let her finish. He took her hand as if she were delicate and fragile, which she supposed she was. He didn't seem angry at all. He seemed...

Before she could process what was happening his mouth closed over hers as he pulled her into his body. His kiss was gentle and loving, not angry and possessive.

She opened eyes she didn't realize she had closed. Godwin kissed her, but he was watching Josh. She couldn't kiss him back, not frozen with guilt as she was, but he held her tenderly nonetheless.

The incubus released her a moment later, pulling her face so she fell into his eyes. He smiled, then ran his fingers over her collar, forcing her to feel his arousal. He was proud of her for exploring her desires, proud of Josh, too.

"I am not upset with either of you," he said, looking at Josh, then back to her. She relaxed a tiny bit, but she still felt like she had betrayed him. He frowned, tasting her emotions in the air.

"You are free to explore your desires, Hansa."

"But-"

"No, Seneca. No arguing. I want you to explore your sexuality, although I would like to lay down some ground rules so that you do not feel this way. In all things between the three of us, or even others, if you choose to have others join, you will always be in control. Always." He watched her struggle, then pursed his lips.

Godwin sat down in her armchair, pulling her down with him. She struggled, then ended up between his legs on the floor.

"I...Godwin..." she started, but she had no idea what she wanted to say. Josh was still bleeding, she could smell it, and it distracted her. "I need to finish Josh's bite," she announced, pushing herself off the floor.

As she approached Josh their eyes met. They shared a moment, guilty co-conspirators in the principal's office. Josh smiled shyly. "May I?" she asked, reaching for his neck.

"Yes, please. I'd rather not have scabs, if you don't mind." He didn't sound upset, he'd been trying to make light of it, but she knew better than to abuse Wrens like this. Her guilt multiplied.

"I'm so sorry." She leaned in, closing her mouth over his neck, bracing herself on the couch behind his head, afraid to climb back into his lap again. The jolt of pain from forgetting her arm was still healing had her falling into Josh's lap, feeling like a hot mess.

"Stop apologizing," he whispered, catching her easily. She licked the blood from his neck, then closed her mouth over his punctures. "I'm in this together with you. You've got nothing to be sorry for, not to me."

He'd been right, his punctures were already clotting. She had to reopen them to heal them properly so they wouldn't leave scabs. Josh flinched, then relaxed again as she licked his wounds closed, full of guilt.

When she was done she turned back to Godwin, holding her throbbing arm close to her body. "I'm sorry, Godwin. I don't, I mean, it's just, you said..." Again, she couldn't figure out what to say, so she just shut up.

"Seneca." The command in his voice buckled her knees, though his tone was gentle. "Hansa, please, come here."

She lowered her head and approached him, terrified that the only joy in her life might be shattering apart. When she was close enough he grabbed her good arm and tugged her into his lap.

"Ghanza. Seneca." He cupped her face between his hands, forcing her to look at him.

Mercury-filled eyes stared into her soul, just like the first time they kissed under the tree in the park. His fingers trailed over her cheeks, catching tears she didn't realize she was shedding.

"Seneca, hansa, calm your tears. You are safe, and with those who care for you. You have not betrayed me."

"But-"

He covered her lips with his finger. "No. Hush. Everything is as it should be now."

"Sorry, Godwin, I just wanted to kiss her, I-"

Godwin sighed. "I have done this wrong. Josh, Seneca, I want you to do things you enjoy together.

"If it would help, we could set rules to guide you both as you navigate your desires without, to prevent these feelings of regret and betrayal. Feed me these, Seneca," he said, moving one hand over her heart. "Give them to me, feed me."

She nodded, her tears making everything blurry. He didn't move, thought, and her stomach tightened painfully as she realized he was going to make her do it.

"Win..." she whined, overwhelmed.

"All is well," he insisted, resting his forehead against her own. "You on our Josh was very sexy."

"How long were you here?" she squeaked, closing her eyes again.

"Hmm," he said, thinking. "From the time that our Josh asked you to bite him."

Even though he told her it was fine, her stomach still hollowed out, then filled with embarrassment.

"I enjoy your embarrassment, hansa, but I do not ever want you ashamed of your desire." He paused, considering his next words. "Now is not that time." He sighed. "For now, all is well. Feed me these, Seneca."

She leaned in, her eyes still closed, and pressed her lips against his. He didn't pull them from her, so she forced herself to calm down, pushing her guilt into her box, then kissed him gently. This time he responded, wrapping his arms around her back. He pulled her down on his lap so that his erection nestled firmly between her legs.

It pushed her lust to the forefront and she kissed him hard, thrusting herself into his mouth. He grunted as she pushed her raw emotions into his mouth. His hands tensed on her hips, his whole body going rigid. She immediately backed off, breaking away from the kiss.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, feeling like she had messed this up, too.

His lips closed over hers. She felt him spool up her emotions, again reminding her of their first kiss. It calmed her as he twisted and coiled her emotions, then pulled them gently.

She truly relaxed for the first time since her attack, her body sagging with relief as the horrible feelings from the past few days drained from her.

Josh moved, she heard him moving, but she couldn't open her eyes, could only feel what Godwin was doing to her.

Eventually he relented and her emotions leveled out. When she could open her eyes again she saw Josh had climbed into the arm of her chair, leaning into Godwin's side. Josh ran his fingers through Godwin's hair and the incubus leaned into it, humming in pleasure.

They sat like that, Godwin kissing her like she was precious, and Josh running his fingers through Godwin's thick black hair for long enough that her heart calmed and her tears dried up, long enough that her lust began to distract her.

Josh's eyes were half closed as he caressed Godwin's hair, almost as if he'd hypnotized himself as he petted the incubus. He looked content, and it made her feel better.

"Rules?" she asked after a few more moments of comfortable silence.

Josh nodded in agreement, blinking his eyes open. He sat up and pulled his hands out of Godwin's hair, leaving it standing on edge a bit. It was cute.

"Very well," Godwin said, shaking his head slightly. She went to move off of his lap, away from his distracting erection, but he kept her in place with hands on her hips. "No, stay here, you too, Josh Crocker. I enjoy when we are all touching."

She bit the inside of her lip, embarrassed for the millionth time of the day. Josh leaned forward, wrapping his arm around Godwin's neck, resting his head on his shoulder.

"How are you so cool with all of this?" she asked, a bit jealous of how easily Josh was able to accept it all.

"Dunno," he said with a shrug. Godwin's hand snaked into Josh's hair over his shoulder. Josh closed his eyes, leaning into Godwin's touch. "I feel good. He's right, I feel so much calmer when we are all together. It just feels right."

She huffed, trying not to be jealous, and failing.

Josh noticed. "Seneca, we're all having fun, and we're doing stuff that... I dunno. I wouldn't be able to do this with anyone else. I wouldn't be able to admit I enjoy this. Like, him watching us, how I feel when he touches me, I like it. This is, like, I don't want to say it's easy, because that would cheapen it. This feels exclusive, special. You two are something I want to treasure, and this relationship, it's something that I want to protect, along with you both. I want this, what we have together, more than I've wanted anything in a long time."

"You only know the smallest bit of what could be between us three, Josh Crocker. There is so much more pleasure to explore together."

She shivered, both afraid of what Godwin meant, and also longing for it with every fiber of her being.

Of course Shackles chose that moment to jump up on the cluttered coffee table to issue a loud, whiny mewl. She could smell his fishy cat breath from where she sat. Her face burned with embarrassment.

"Shack!" she squeaked, pushing herself off of Godwin. "Come on, you smelly beast. Sorry, sorry, he's decided it's time for his wet food, I need to feed him or he won't leave us alone. Sorry, I'll be, I'm sorry." She practically ran to the hallway shaped kitchen, and in a moment the smell of cheap canned cat food filled her apartment.

Meanwhile, the fussy Persian twined through her legs like he always did when food was involved, the only time he ever showed her any affection. "Thanks, Shack," she muttered as he mewled and cried for her to hurry up. The cat was already gobbling out of the dish before it even touched the mat where his regular food and water were. "Calm down, cat," she said, the same thing she said every time she fed him. "You act like I starve you..."

She blushed, temporarily forgetting that both men were watching her. Godwin had his fingers in Josh's hair, he'd moved to sit between the incubus's legs on the floor.

She washed her hands, then headed back. Instead of joining Josh and Godwin, she chose to sit on the couch by herself, unable to break into their shared intimacy.

Godwin gave her a look that said he would allow her the space for now. He didn't mean it to, but it bloomed a small bud of guilt in her belly. Apparently she was an endless fount of guilt.

"Sorry. Shackles kinda adopted me, maybe he was the previous owner's cat, I dunno. But, he just kept showing up at the door and crying everyday, and I felt bad for him, so I started feeding him, then one day he waltzed inside and he's been here ever since. He's a little rough around the edges, but he's okay."

"You're good people, Seneca. Most people would ignore him, or call the dog warden." Josh smiled, still draped around Godwin.

She shrugged. "Well, I was raised in a house where we rescued animals, I couldn't do that."

"You didn't have to keep him, though."

She shrugged and the conversation died out.

Godwin sighed. "So, rules?" He looked at her and she nodded, then to Josh who did the same. "Very well. The first, and most important rule is that of the safeword. If anyone uses the word, everything stops. We fix whatever is wrong, and either continue or end for the night."

"Firefly?" Josh asked.

Godwin nodded. "Yes. If you are not enjoying our play, or if you are uncomfortable, do not hesitate to use it."

Josh nodded, then wrinkled his forehead. "Wait, me?"

"Yes, you. The word works for any of us."

Josh looked confused. "But, isn't it just for Seneca?"

Godwin pulled Josh's hair and his head followed until they were gazing into each other's eyes. "Why would you believe that we do not wish for you to enjoy what we do together? I want nothing more than for you to enjoy our time together."

"I mean, I do, I just thought, like, um. Yeah. Okay."

Godwin held his gaze for another moment, then relaxed his hand in Josh's hair. Josh kept his head back, studying the incubus.

"Any of us may engage in intimacy with each other. I do not need to be present for you two to enjoy one another's company, and you do not need to report to me or anything of that nature. Unless, of course, you desire to tease me, wish to brag, or as a request for advice."

"Wait, um, any of us?" Josh asked, leaning his head back again. "Like, um?"

Godwin actually blushed a little, she was sure of it. "Only if you were interested in what I could offer you if you were to choose to play with me."

"Oh," Josh said, sounding overwhelmed. "Um, okay."

"I wish for you both to experiment and enjoy the physical pleasures of life, and I am honored that you would allow me to guide your experiences."

"Win..." He sounded vulnerable, sounded like he needed this as much as she did. She felt closer to Godwin, felt like she understood him a little better.

"Either of you may take other lovers than those of us here together now, with no feelings of jealousy or betrayal. I have dedicated my service to Seneca as my Ghanza, and if you wish it, I will dedicate it to you as well, Josh Crocker. I will dedicate myself to any others either of you choose to bring into our play as well, with discretion, of course."

Godwin continued on while she was still wrapping her head around what he'd just said. "One other rule, under your discretion of course, Seneca, but I believe it best that our play does not include vaginal intercourse. Not when blood is involved."

Her heart sank. Did that mean he wouldn't have sex with her again? "No, I don't agree."

Godwin looked up at her, surprise on his face. "You wish to-"

"No, I want you!" she interrupted, so embarrassed she could die. "I just want to, like, the other night, you're the only one, like, it's never felt like that before." She couldn't look at either of them, afraid, embarrassed, ashamed.

Godwin was quiet for a few breaths, then he exhaled slowly, nodding. "As you wish, Ghanza. It is something we will navigate carefully as we proceed." He looked down at Josh. "Do you agree with the rules? I would not have jealousy tear our arrangement asunder."

"So, no penetration, but we can do everything else?" he said, tilting his head thoughtfully. "That's not a problem for me. Is it only her, though? I mean. Ah, um, ah..." he began hesitantly. "Does, um, can, oh, god this is embarrassing, but, like, you seemed to imply, earlier, like, me and, um, you?"

"Josh Crocker, do you desire to play with me?" Godwin asked, looking at the him, the flush on his cheeks again.

Josh's face was bright red, all the way to his ears. Seneca knew how he felt. He was gnawing on bottom lip, then shook his head. "Fuck it. Yeah, I guess so, like wanna try things, um, with you. Like, only if that's okay..."

"Seneca?" Godwin asked, looking back to her. She noticed he'd taken one of Josh's hands in his own.

"Huh?" she asked. "Me? What?"

"Do you have any discomfort with homosexual acts?" Godwin asked. Both Godwin and Josh watched for her reaction and she looked away, unable to meet either of their eyes.

"Homosexual, you two?" She squeaked.

"Yes, hansa. Our Josh is curious to play with me, and we are both male. Thus, homosexual acts."

"Oh."

"Does the thought of us together make you discomforted? Do you find it offensive?"

"No, I don't know!"

Godwin flinched at her flustered answer. "I will do nothing that you find offensive, Ghanza," he replied. She couldn't tell if he was upset or not.

She forced herself to think about it a little, she'd never even considered the thought of what it meant for two men to make love. "I mean, um, I don't really know too much about it, honestly..." she said after a few breaths. "I think, like, maybe I need to see it for myself to decide."