All Comments on 'The Lord of Keeley Hall'

very well for your first story, flowed nicely and wasn't rushed into sex and thankfully no huge cock, large breasted girl is fine as long as you don't go overboard.

enjoyed your story keep on writing

A real bodice ripper, although in this case I guess a bodice unbuttoner. I liked the way you started things in the middle of the action, leaving it not exactly clear to the reader whether Emily was terrified or excited with anticipation or both. I also thought that the contrast between Victor's cunning lecherousness and Emily's until-something-maybe-comes-along innocence was very well presented. The brazenness of Victor's bet really was shocking. Thanks for this nice story.

You shouldn't have worried about submitting your first story. You have given us two memorable characters and you effortlessly painted the scene. A (late night) costume drama on BBC beckons.

A good start. My only quibble is that the use of US phraseology and spelling sits uncomfortably with the very English subject matter. If you are doing this to pander to US tastes, I really don't think you need to. I'm sure that your US readers would feel much the same as I, as a Brit do about US literature - I accept it for what it is. So, please be true to yourself, and your story telling.

Look forward to the next episode.

Jim

I enjoyed it, pity that there's no second part :/