The Magic Remote: Tiffany Coyne

I was in my neighborhood electronics store called Mister E's. It was an awesome store, a real mom and pop shop that would give you real advice on a purchase and not just try to sell you the latest and most expensive thing in the place.

I was greeted by a familiar face. A tall man with neatly parted short black hair. He wore a white dress shirt and khakis. His nametag said, Steve.

"Hi, what can I help you with?" Steve asked.

"I need a new TV remote," I said. "I busted mine."

"No problem," Steve said. "Follow me."

I kept up with Steve as he took me past an aisle of TVs, then stereos, then home theaters. We finally stopped at a rack on the back wall where all the remotes hung in plastic packages.

"You on a budget?" Steve asked.

"Always," I said.

I was a poor college student.

Steve reached up high and grabbed a remote from the top of the rack. He blew a layer of dust off the package.

I sneezed.

"Bless you," Steve said. "I think this will do." He handed me the package.

The remote was called the Telemaster 2000 and it looked a little bit old. "Will this work with a Sony?"

"Sure," Steve said. "It'll work with all the popular brands and it's only ten bucks."

"Can't beat that," I said. "Thank you."

"Thank you for coming in today," Steve said.

I went to the front of the store, paid with cash, and made my way back home.

I plopped down on my broken down old gray couch and opened up the Telemaster 2000 remote. A white booklet fell out. I picked it up, it was the instructions.

TO PROGRAM: POINT REMOTE AT TV AND HOLD MUTE AND 8 FOR 6.8 SECONDS.

TO TEST: PRESS VOLUME UP. IF VOLUME INCREASES STOP. IF VOLUME DOES NOT INCREASE PLEASE TRY PROGRAM INSTRUCTIONS AGAIN.

I stood up and turned on the TV with the button on top of the set. I pointed the Telemaster at the TV and held the two buttons for as close to 6.8 seconds as I could estimate. I released the buttons. I pushed VOLUME UP.

The volume on the TV went from 15 to 16.

Success!

"That was easy," I said.

I flipped channels until I landed on one of my favorite game shows, Let's Make A Deal.

I turned up the volume. The hosts, Wayne and Jonathan were doing a silly skit with a contestant dressed as a policeman. They were doing some improv and I was always impressed at how Wayne and Jonathan seemed to always make it work, even the dumbest stuff.

I tossed the remote next to me on the couch.

Everything went blinding white. So white I had to shut my eyes.

"What's happening!" I yelled.

Was this the end? The apocalypse? Did I just die of a heart attack on the couch?

The light went away. I opened my eyes. I was on a bed. I was still in my jeans and green polo shirt. I felt okay. I felt fine actually. I looked around, I wasn't on a real bed, it was a zany looking caricature of a bed, above me hung a big sign that said Zonk with a cartoon picture of a sheep on each side.

"Zonk," I muttered.

I looked around some more, a big curtain was a few feet away. All of a sudden I heard a huge roar from a crowd. It startled me so much I nearly fell off the bed. I heard voices. Familiar voices. It was Wayne and Jonathan and they were doing the exact improv skit I just watched on TV.

I swung my legs off the bed and tip-toed to the curtain.

"What are you doing over there?"

I jerked my hands away from the curtain and spun around. "Nothing!"

"Are you the one they sent? You're late."

I couldn't answer that question. I couldn't speak. My tongue was all twisted up as I stared at Tiffany Coyne. Tiffany was the hot blonde co-host of Let's Make A Deal. She looked like a golden goddess standing in front of me with her perfectly tanned muscular legs, gleaming silvery dress, and platinum blonde hair. Her blue eyes were locked onto me. "Well, are you the one?"

"Uh--yeah," I said, not wanting to explain that a magic TV remote brought me here. That would get me a quick trip to the looney bin in a straightjacket.

"Did they tell you what I expect?" Tiffany said, stepping closer.

I got the scent of her sexy perfume. I couldn't believe I was right here with a woman that I had jerked-off to countless times.

"No, they didn't tell me anything."

"Well," Tiffany said. "I guess that's good actually. I'll tell you exactly what I want. Get back on this bed, we don't have much time."

"Okay," I went back to the cartoonish bed and sat on the side.

Tiffany crossed her arms, pushing up her firm breasts. She cocked her hip to the side and tapped a high-heeled foot. "Show me what you got."

"What I got?"

"Yes, that's what they pay you for. To do whatever I say. To get me ready before a show. So do it. Get naked."

"Naked!"

Tiffany groaned. She stepped forward and started unbuttoning and unzipping me. "I don't have time for your games."

"Okay, okay," I said, getting the message. I yanked my shirt over my head.

Tiffany pulled my jeans and boxer shorts down in one quick motion. My cock sprang up. Tiffany's blue eyes went wide. "Wow," she said. "You sure do have a big penis for such a skinny guy."

"Thanks," I said. I knew my cock was surprisingly big for my size. I was barely six feet tall and only weighed one-sixty, but I had a thick nine-inch dick.

Tiffany took me in her hand and stroked me. She dropped to her knees and stared at my cock. "I'm gonna have to give it my all to get this big thing down my throat."

I loved the way she looked on her knees in front of me. Her blonde hair looked so nice, I reached down to run my fingers through her silky hair.

Tiffany opened her mouth and leaned forward. Her soft lips wrapped around my shaft. Her warm wet mouth felt so wonderful. She sucked hard. I knew she was getting more than a few drops of pre-cum down her throat.

"Oh Tiffany," I groaned.

She popped her lips off my cock. "You just wait," she said with a cocky smile. The platinum blonde thirty-seven-year-old wrapped her lips around my cock and leaned forward. Inch after inch of my shaft disappeared down her throat. Her rough tongue tickled the underside of my shaft. She looked up at me with those beautiful blue eyes, she had more than a mouthful.

She had to back off, she gasped for air as she stroked me. Long streams of spit and pre-cum dangled from her pink lips.

"How was that?" she asked.

"Damn good," I said.

She went back down on me, wrapping her lips around my cock, bobbing back and forth. She even sucked my balls, pulling them into her mouth one at a time and lightly tugging them.

Tiffany pushed me down on the bed. She stood up and pulled her dress over her head. She wasn't wearing any underwear.

My eyes bulged out of my head. My cock throbbed and spit a glob of pre-cum.

Tiffany had the most perfect breasts I'd ever seen. She had small pink nipples. They were nice handfuls and had no tan lines at all. Between Tiffany's legs was a neatly trimmed platinum blonde landing strip that matched the hair on her head. Tiffany had an amazing, toned body. It was easy to see that she spent hours in the gym, sculpting her shoulders, perfecting those abs, and toning those legs.

"I can't wait to ride that massive dick!" Tiffany said.

I couldn't wait either. As she climbed onto the big silly bed my whole body started tingling. I'd never fucked a girl as hot as Tiffany Coyne, this was a once in a lifetime chance. All thanks to that crazy remote. Thank God for Mister E's Electronics.

Tiffany straddled me. She grabbed my cock and slid my mushroom head up and down her wet pussy lips. I could feel those soft lips as well as the heat coming off Tiffany's wet pussy. I wanted it.

I grabbed her hips and pulled. She slid right down on my cock and threw her head back, moaning loudly. "Oh fuck! It's so big!"

I smiled. That was just the reaction I wanted. Tiffany's pussy was extremely tight and so warm that I never wanted to leave. Her pink lips stretched all around my shaft. She started bouncing up and down.

"YES! OH YES!" Tiffany moaned.

She was getting pretty loud, I wondered if anyone could hear us. I didn't wonder long, because Tiffany's bouncing titties had me hypnotized. I grabbed them first, squeezing and kneading them in my hands, pulling at her little pink nipples. Then I leaned forward, unable to resist, and sucked on her nipples, teasing both of them with my tongue, and lightly pulling them with my teeth.

Tiffany was bouncing hard now, pounding up and down on me. "YES! YES! YES! FUCK YES!"

Her pussy clenched me like a vice. She shook and shivered and dug her fingernails into my arms as a powerful orgasm overtook her.

I gently lifted her off my cock and put her on her back on the bed. I crawled between her legs and took in the wonderful musky scent of Tiffany Coyne's wet pussy. I dove right in, licking and sucking and slurping up Tiffany's sweet pussy juices. I spread her slick lips with my fingers and found her swollen clit. I licked her little nub until she screamed with pleasure. I circled it with my tongue and lightly kissed it, just teasing her, then I really put my mouth on it and started sucking and licking furiously.

Tiffany gripped my head, jamming my face into her sopping wet pussy. I kept licking and slurping as she quivered.

"YES! YES! YES! FUCK! FUCK! FUCK! FFFUUUUCCCKKK!"

I popped my head up, looking over Tiffany's fuzzy pubic mound at her dazed blue eyes. She smiled at me. My face was covered in her sweet juices. I'm sure that's what made her smile.

I put my hands on her hips and rolled her over. She just kinda flopped over on the bed. She was so limp from the powerful orgasm.

I had a feeling that wasn't going to last long as I lined my cock up with Tiffany's pink asshole. My mushroom head had barely touched her pink hole when she tightened up.

"Whoa!" Tiffany said.

"What?"

"I've never let anybody use that one, and you're so big you'll rip me wide open."

I pushed forward, making her pucker even tighter. I was nowhere near inside her ass, maybe a quarter of an inch was in, just enough to tease me.

"I'll be gentle," I said.

"With that big cock, I'm not sure anything is gentle."

I grabbed her hips, fingers digging into her soft tan skin. I pulled her back. "Just relax."

Little by little my head slid in, but I hadn't made it past the thickest part. I heard Tiffany pull in a deep breath and slowly let it out. Her tight pink asshole finally relaxed, allowing me to pop right in her virgin ass.

"OOOHHHHHH!" Tiffany buried her face in the bedsheets. She gripped the headboard railing. All the muscles in her arms and back tensed as I pushed forward.

I kept going until I was balls deep in her pretty little ass. I leaned forward, running my hands up her body until I found her tits. I gave them another hard squeeze. Tiffany's ass was going crazy, clenching down on my cock, squeezing me harder than I'd ever felt. It was safe to say I'd never been in such a tight hole.

I backed out a few inches, then I pushed forward.

"OOOHHHHHH!"

I grabbed her hips again and really started pumping. I fucked Tiffany's tight ass furiously. My balls smacked against her pussy.

SLAP! SLAP! SLAP!

"OH! OH! OH! OHMYGOD! OOOHHHHHH!" Tiffany screamed.

Her ass started to clench and release me. Her body started to quiver. She tensed up and arched her back. She looked over her shoulder at me, blue eyes rolling up in her head as she came again.

Her virgin asshole was so tight and warm. It was incredible and I didn't ever want to stop fucking her, but my cock was throbbing and my balls were full. I thrust in and out.

"Tiffany, I'm about to cum!"

"YES! SHOOT THAT BIG LOAD! CUM ALL OVER ME! CUM ON MY BACK!"

My balls clenched. I pulled out of Tiffany's tight hole. My cock rested in her crack as it pulsed. I shot an enormous stream that went all the way to the base of her neck. I groaned and squeezed again as another stream landed just below her sculpted shoulder blades. My stream fired from my tip, landing in the sway of Tiffany's tan back.

I was holding her so tight. We were moaning together. Enjoying the hot fucking. We both seemed to glow. And it was hot, really warm up here.

Wait a minute. We were actually glowing. I looked over and saw tons of bright lights pointed at us. I squinted through the brightness and saw the hosts of Let's Make A Deal, Wayne and Jonathan, staring at us with their mouths open. The entire costumed crowd was quiet.

"Anal sex?" Wayne said.

"He really zonked the hell out of her," Jonathan said.

Tiffany squealed and frantically crawled out from under me. She grabbed her dress off the floor and tried to put it on before every single member of the audience turned their cell phone camera on.

Sitting right where Tiffany's naked body was just seconds ago was the Telemaster 2000. A round button in the center of the remote was glowing green. The button said HOME. I pushed it.

In the blink of an eye I was back on my couch, clothes on and everything. I was watching Let's Make A Deal on TV.

"Now that we're back from technical difficulties lets get on with the show," Wayne said.

Tiffany was on screen, modeling a prize, her cheeks were all rosy and her eyes looked dazed.

Did that really happen? I wondered.

I reached into my pants and stroked my cock. I pulled my hand out and sniffed it. No mistaking that smell. I looked at the Telemaster 2000 remote in awe.

I was going to have some fun.