All Comments on 'The Perfect Pair Pt. 10'

still enjoying the story but Brooke is still acting bitchy too often for my taste. She is clearly disrespecting Dennis and on purpose. It really takes away from the whole original idea. Clearly Carrie is going to be a regular recurring character but I'm not sure how that will play out. Dennis can't be as open as Brooke for obvious reasons

I love how Brooke is pushing Denise. She clearly enjoys the thought of being sub to her!

LOVE the story. It moves right along and stays on track. HOT!

Some writerly changes might help, though. Maybe get rid of the inappropriate commas - there are many...too many. And combine the one sentence paragraphs with something more substantial.