All Comments on 'The Pool House Pt. 01'

Senior couple, in their 70's. Married a long time. Great. Like the story, but.

The most unbelievable part of the story is that she was in charge of the sex for the first time!! That's not how it works. Within a few years of happy marriage a wife,or husband, will know exactly where to take control and get the sexual satisfaction needed. Even people who married 50 years ago, like me😍,lol.

AMerryman

A loving couple having fun...just the two of them...And that is a breath of fresh air. 3*

The fact that you use the need for a personal description of what is occurring... as though the individual you are with has to be told what you are doing to and with them because they don't know, to be distracting to getting involved with the story

Loving Wives is extra marital fun and so far nothing like that has appeared in this short piece. If you, like so many other idiot authors didn't bother to read the category description you're better to delete this and start over in Romance or Erotic where it belongs.

Chapters should be 2-3 pages long minimum to give the reader something to sink their teeth into and this doesn't qualify. Frankly short 1 page offerings often don't do well. If I rated it so far it would be a 1* for all the above reasons.

You might want to look up the meaning of brassier vs brassiere. I've never seen brassy tits before.

Obviously, you haven't read the category description either.

Whether you like it or not, the "& more" part of the category description has allowed for stories such as this for well over a decade.

That it doesn't fit YOUR description of LW is obvious, and it is your right to feel that way and comment about it. To call writers idiots because you don't care for a story just shows your idiocy.

BUT, Laurel is the final arbiter of where a story belongs, not you, and she has seen fit to allow a very broad definition of LW for years.

If you don't like her definition of LW, why don't you talk to her about it? This has been an ongoing discussion since the Troubadour was writing, and though nothing has changed yet, maybe you, with your wonderful eloquence may be able to change her mind.

I doubt it though.

First of all I posted this in the loving wives section because it is just one of many stories that will follow involving my loving wife in various situations. Secondly, I usually do spell better than the computer spell checker but don't notice every time when a word gets 'auto-corrected'. I'll watch closer for this in the future.

These stories are actually short letters I used to write to my wife when we were separated for a short period of time as sort of a game we played back and forth so they may not be exactly what readers of conventional erotic fiction are be used to reading.

Forgot to add that we appreciate any and all comments about our stories and especially appreciate critical comments about writing stories in general as I am not a writer so anything I can do to improve my skills will only make my wife happier.

...too short, lacks any character development, the eroticism is constrained by a perfunctory description of the sex, and it's in the wrong category. Good effort, though.

Not many people who frequent this category like reading about a woman being fucked by her own husband...that includes me. 3*

No cheating and cucks in this one. Good story.

No build up whatsoever.