The Tale of the Too Close Twins

INTRODUCTION & DISCLAIMER - When Andrew, a student from Sydney Australia meets fraternal twin brother and sister Shane and Karen who have recently moved from Newcastle they become good friends. Andrew notes that the brother and sister have a twin bond and even some impressive telepathy, but nothing seems amiss until over a year later, when Andrew starts seeing things that are out of place and wondering just how close Shane and Karen really are.

Is it all in Andrew's imagination, or are twins Shane and Karen really too close for comfort? Find out by reading 'The Tale of the Too Close Twins' - an entry in the April Fools Day Story Contest 2024 - and be sure to rate and comment. All characters engaging in sexual activity are 18 or older at the time, and they and the events of the story are fictional, with similarity to real persons living or dead coincidental and unintentional.

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Growing up in the northern suburbs of the Australian city of Sydney, New South Wales in the 1970s and 1980s, I had very limited experience with twins in my formative years.

I was the younger of two boys, my brother Kevin two years older than me. Our Mum Susan and Dad John both had siblings and cousins, which meant Kevin and I had plenty of cousins and second cousins, but no twins in our generation, nor any in our parents' generation either.

The same was true of our grandparents' generation - no twins of any type to be seen among a large number of children. There was a set of non-identical twin brothers in my great-grandparents generation, but they were born so many years ago that they had both passed away when Kevin and I arrived in the world in 1971 and 1973 respectively.

When I started primary school there was a set of identical twin brothers in my class, and in the higher grades a set of non-identical twin sisters. One of the girls in my year had identical twin sister cousins but they lived on the other side of Sydney and I never met them, the fraternal twin girls were so much older than me so I never really knew them before they left for high school.

As for the twin boys in my class, they were a classic case of double trouble, always in the headmaster's office for one indiscretion after another. I think the teachers and administrators at my school were deeply relieved when their family moved to Canberra when the boys were at the end of Year 3. Thinking back about my former classmates, I couldn't help but wondering whether these twin boys would grow up to be the much-feared bosses of Sydney's criminal underworld, operating their vast organized crime network out of some seedy nightclub in Kings Cross like the infamous twins Ronnie and Reggie Kray had done in London's East End in the 1960s. Given that the twins' antics included running a protection racket against any boys they considered to be 'poofter', I could well believe it.

In the middle years of primary school we had a male teacher who was a fraternal brother-sister twin, but we of course never met his twin sister. Sometimes we would encounter twins - for example when we went on holiday to Port Macquarie up on the New South Wales Mid North Coast around this time there was a family staying nearby with non-identical twin boys - but otherwise our encounters with children of multiple births were few and far between.

Among my brother's friends, my friends and my parents' friends and their own kids, there were no twins to be seen apart from Pam. She and her husband were friends of Mum and Dad and I often played with their own kids. Pam had an identical twin sister named Linda, but I had never met her.

One year just before Easter I happened to watch a documentary on TV about twins and sat glued to the screen, fascinated by tales of twin telepathy, mostly between identical twins but sometimes fraternal twins too. There were stories of amazing coincidences between twins separated at birth and raised in completely different places and circumstances; a set of twin sisters from England who spoke, ate and walked in unison; and twins who always bought the same gifts for each other with no knowledge of what their sibling was buying.

Another segment was how a twin brother and sister said they always got colds at the same time, even when living separately as adults. Even stranger was a set of identical mirror image twins where one brother fell and broke his left arm at work, while his twin brother on summer vacation with his own family tripped and broke his right arm while fishing at the exact same moment.

Very interested in twins after seeing this, I raised the topic with Pam at an Easter barbeque that weekend, hoping that she had plenty of similar stories with her twin Linda. Pam however had laughed and said, "Sorry to disappoint you Andrew, but I'm afraid none of that happened with Linda and me."

Pam had then said that growing up that her and Linda - despite being mirror-image twin sisters which tended to look the most similar and have more chance of twin telepathy - had never gotten along well as kids, much less having a twin bond. There were no amazing coincidences, no strange cases of the girls getting sick or injured at the same time, and no telepathy between them. Even now as adults - Linda living down in Melbourne with her own husband and kids - the twins rarely contacted each other.

During high school, the lack of twins in my life rarely entered my mind. So I certainly wasn't expecting a set of twins to become such an important part of my life, until the day it actually happened with a chance meeting.

It was the week before Christmas 1989 - a Wednesday - and I was on leave from high school for the summer, having just finished Year 10. Like many teenagers, I had a part time job and mine was at a discount department store at a large shopping center in the area where I lived, so this was where I could be found on this grey and humid summer's day.

Being so close to Christmas and with schools across New South Wales all on leave the mall was packed with people. Some kid ran off screaming and sobbing in terror when he saw Father Christmas assisted by two elves approaching, his mother having to chase him. A short way away a couple who looked to be in their mid-30s engaged each other in a heated argument, having no qualms about airing all the details of their marital problems in front of hundreds of people like characters in a soap opera. Perhaps they should have asked Santa to grant them a divorce for Christmas?

As I anticipated, queues at the checkouts were miles long in the shop where I worked and shoppers jostled with each other for space. When I put on my uniform and caught the bus to work that morning on a typical sub-tropical Sydney day, I wasn't expecting this would be the day I would meet my new best friend and my new crush at once. Fate however had a different path in store for me than an otherwise ordinary day which I probably wouldn't have remembered a few months into the upcoming year of 1990.

I was working at the service desk, and first caught sight of them walking through the Christmas crush towards me. A tall, slim handsome teenage boy with light brown hair tending to blonde brushed back from his forehead in the same style I wore my own hair, although my hair color was a contrasting dark brown. He wore a white tee-shirt and a sleeveless open stone-wash denim jacket over the top, and matching stone-wash denim jeans and white sneakers on his bottom half.

The girl next to him was about two inches shorter and exceptionally pretty, and like her male companion wore a white tee-shirt and sleeveless jacket on her top half, although her jacket was purple in color and the fabric not denim. On her bottom half the young woman wore a short purple bubble skirt, with white ankle socks and white sneakers. The young lady's hair was similar in color to that of her companion although one would say her hair was blonde tending to light brown while for the young man it was the opposite. Her hair was long and was hanging loose down over her shoulders, and on her head she sported a purple floppy hat sometimes called a 'waif hat', the front brim pinned upwards with a yellow sunflower, these hats becoming quite popular with teenage girls in recent years.

The boy and girl paused, looking into the department store, then made their way to the service desk, where I approached them. "Good morning, how can I help you?" I asked, smiling and putting on my most professional customer service demeanor.

"Oh hi Andrew," said the girl, reading my nametag. "Could we please speak with the manager?"

Clearly they must have bought something from the store that was defective and wished to return it for a replacement or refund. No matter, I could help them out with this, and accordingly picked up a form. "Perhaps I could help you in the first instance?" I asked. "Do you have an item that you wish to return for a refund or an exchange? Or if there was some sort of problem I could take the preliminary details before I contact a manager for you?"

The blonde girl smiled, this making her even prettier, and adjusted her hat on her long blonde hair. "No, it's okay, we don't have a return, exchange or complaint." She reached into a shoulder bag she was carrying, and pulled out two large white envelopes.

"My name's Karen, and this is my brother Shane, and we were hoping to hand in our resumes and ask if there were any jobs going," said Karen.

"Pleased to meet you both, Karen and Shane," I said, shaking their hands and taking the envelopes. "I can hand these to the manager, and ask her to contact you if there are any positions available."

"Thanks Andrew, we both worked at this shop back in Newcastle," said Shane.

"We just moved down here from Newcastle on the weekend," said Karen.

"I thought I hadn't seen you around before," I said. "So which Newcastle are you from? The one in the Hunter region, or the one in England?"

Shane and Karen looked at me, then at each other, and both began laughing. "I don't want to seem rude Andrew, but do we sound like we're Geordies from the Newcastle in England?" Karen asked.

"I can't even do a Geordie accent," said Shane. "It comes out as Welsh."

I blushed and felt my skin going as red as the Father Christmas hat I like all other store workers wore on my head, feeling a fool. Like myself, Shane and Karen obviously had Australian accents, but growing up in the city my accent was more the 'standard' Australian accent. Shane and Karen, like many other people from the regional cities like Newcastle, Wollongong, Gosford or Goulburn had the broader Australian accents.

"No, I guess not," I said, still berating myself internally. This was so much like me. Why did I always get tongue-tied and say dumb things whenever pretty girls like Karen were about? "Sorry, that must have sounded so dumb ..."

Karen and Shane again laughed. "It's okay Andrew," Karen assured me.

"Yeah, you look like you're really busy today mate, easy mistake to make," said Shane. He indicated the store filled with customers swarming around like bees or ants.

"We'd better get going, lots of shops to give our resumes to," said Karen.

"I'll make sure the store manager gets these straight away," I said. "Thanks for stopping by. And good luck with your job hunting."

"Thanks mate," said Shane, he and his sister going on their way to the muffin shop across the way and handing their resume to the lady that ran this store, and then onto an electronics store in the shop adjacent to this.

They were certainly pro-active in looking for jobs so soon after moving not only house but cities too, I thought to myself as I handed Shane and Karen's resumes to the store manager and went to serve an older woman who was trying to get a refund for an inflatable crocodile pool lilo. She had purchased it to amuse her grandkids when they swam in her backyard pool, but rather than entertain them all the blow-up crocodile did was terrify them. All through the busy morning I found myself thinking about Shane and Karen, hoping that their job search was going well.

I found myself speculating upon who was older of the brother and sister, but couldn't really tell. Presumably they were close in age, two years at most. I also found myself hoping that Shane and Karen would be successful in obtaining part time jobs at the store where I worked. Shane seemed really nice and while his sister likewise seemed really nice too, she was also very pretty, so cute in her tee-shirt, bubble skirt and waif hat.

Karen filled most of my thoughts until lunchtime came around, and I headed to a nearby café I liked where I stopped in dismay. With the mall packed with pre-Christmas shoppers and the time just after noon, the café was packed and no way was I going to get a seat for lunch.

Until I heard a young male voice calling out. "Andrew, hey Andrew, come and sit with us."

Looking across the crowded café I saw Shane sitting at a table, Karen beside him. Feeling very happy at seeing them, I made my way across. "Thanks Shane," I said. "As long as it's okay ..."

"Of course it is," said Karen. "We invited you."

"Well thank you," I said, taking my seat at the table and the brother and sister sitting opposite each other.

What happened next surprised me, it was something I had never seen before. One of the waitresses, a middle-aged woman approached our table. "Can I take your orders please?" she asked.

"Thank you," said Shane politely. He indicated Karen. "My sister Karen would like a toasted ham, Swiss cheese and pineapple sandwich and a strawberry milkshake please."

Now it was Karen's turn. "My brother Shane would like a roast beef, cheddar cheese and chutney toasted sandwich and a blue heaven milkshake please."

The waitress jotted the details down on her notepad, but looked really confused, before turning to me. "And for you young man?"

I think that she was expecting me to order for an invisible girl who sat opposite, but to her relief I said, "Could I get a toasted chicken, tomato and mayonnaise sandwich with a banana milkshake please?"

"Of course," said the waitress, taking our orders and heading back to the kitchen, casting a confused glance at me and my lunch companions as she went on her way.

Shane and Karen both laughed, and Karen turned to me. "You're a bit confused about what just happened then, aren't you Andrew?" she asked.

I nodded. "Yes, kind of."

"It's the twin telepathy thing," said Karen. "Shane and I both have it. We can read each other's thoughts."

"You're twins?" I asked. "Actually, I was wondering which of you was older, I couldn't tell."

"That would be me by five minutes," said Karen.

"And as you can see, my bossy and over-competitive sister has never let me forget it," said Shane, smiling, laughing and attempting to push Karen's hat to one side on her head, Karen also smiling and laughing as she pushed her brother's hand away.

"My little brother has never gotten over me being born a few minutes before him," laughed Karen. "So Andrew, do you have any brothers or sisters?"

I nodded. "Yes, one brother Kevin. He's two years older than me."

"What does he do?" Shane asked.

"As little as he possibly can," I said, sounding negative and sarcastic when I didn't mean to. I glanced at where Karen had a small plastic bag from a music shop, the CD she had purchased protruding from it.

"I see you like Milli Vanilli," I said, indicating the CD cover looking to change the subject away from a potential conversation about an older brother I sadly had no time for. "I do too, they're so cool, original and talented. This year it was like one moment we'd never heard of them, then all of a sudden they're everywhere."

"Yeah, Milli Vanilli are really cool," said Karen. "One of our younger cousins Amy absolutely loves them, that's why I bought her this CD for Christmas."

Shane laughed. "Yeah right Karen." He then turned to me. "Don't listen to her Andrew. The CD is actually to Karen, from Karen."

Karen laughed and gave her brother a good-natured shove. "Ha, ha, my brother is a comedian today."

Shane and Karen certainly got along well as siblings, I thought to myself as our lunch orders arrived and the three of us continued to talk. As well as being twin brother and sister, they also seemed to be best friends as well.

Truth be told, I was a little envious of them getting along so well. They were a polar opposite from my older brother and Kevin and I, who had never gotten along. Kevin and I were so different, I had always been really studious, into sports and had inherited my parents' hard-working ethics.

Kevin though was the black sheep of the family, a slack bully who might as well have worn a clown costume at all times considering his antics. He was banned from PE classes, any sort of school excursion or camps and if there was a week that went by without Kevin being sent to detention or time out, I couldn't remember it.

He and his stupid mates tormented me with practical jokes growing up such as one of them dressing up as a gorilla and hiding in my wardrobe, leaping out at me roaring when I got home from school. It was little wonder that I was such a good student at school, I never got a chance to misbehave. As soon as any teacher asked if I was related to Kevin Stewart, I knew the routine. I would be ordered to the front of the classroom right in front of the desk, so I could be watched at all times and not have a chance to step out of line.

Fortunately for my stress levels and those of our parents, Kevin no longer lived at home but had moved out to share a house with his stupid mates. Their house in Penrith was a long way from us, way out in Sydney's Western Suburbs close to the Blue Mountains, but for me it was just a little too close. I would have preferred it had Kevin had moved even further west to Perth, the capital city of Western Australia, on the opposite side of Australia's vast land mass. In fact, why even stop at Perth? It would have been even better if Kevin went much further West than WA, and emigrate across the Indian Ocean to live in South Africa.

But with Shane and Karen Jones, they clearly enjoyed each other's company as brother and sister and they were interesting to talk to, the time flying by as we had lunch. And it seemed we would be getting to know each other far more in coming weeks, as Karen and Shane like me were starting Year 11 at the high school I already attended. And with Karen wanting to be a geologist, Shane a botanist and myself a vet, so we would be in all the 'smart' classes together.

We seemed to share quite a few common interests outside of school such as sports, and I also found out that we were all born within the same week in February 1973 and that Karen and Shane's parents had purchased their new house just three streets from where I lived with my parents.

Lunch came to an end, we bade each other goodbye and I went back to my job and Shane and Karen to a combination of job hunting and buying Christmas gifts for family and friends. All through the afternoon I kept thinking about the twins, Karen especially, and when my shift ended I could feel the definite start of a crush, there was no denying it.

I emerged from the air-conditioned shopping center into a very humid and overcast afternoon, large raindrops falling and the forecast of a thunderstorm tonight looking very accurate. I was of course used to these conditions as Sydney was sub-tropical, but today it felt more like the Northern Territory capital of Darwin in the middle of the tropical wet season or North Queensland.

My bus arrived and I climbed aboard and looked out the windows on the journey home through the leafy green northern suburbs. It was especially beautiful this time of year with so many trees and bushes in bloom; the blue-purple jacarandas, the bright red Illawarra flame trees, the yellow laburnums, oleanders of a variety of colors plus no end of eucalypts and other Australian plants. All the way, I kept wishing that Karen and Shane would get jobs at the same discount store where I worked, or at least in the shopping center so we could all see more of each other.