The Things You Make Me Feel Ch. 10

"If you loved me, you would be here now."

"Hon."

He released a sigh. "I'm sorry. I love you, too."

"That's better. See you in a couple."

Oliver shook his head as he fetched himself a beer. He walked out to the patio and plumped down onto the couch, grouchier than ever. Sipping his beer, he stared down at his phone, awaiting developments.

It'd been precisely a fortnight since he'd been forgiven by his mother. They'd been talking regularly now, and that also meant that she was back to meddling in his life. She and Ellie had been giving him useless pep talks, constantly reassuring him, but they had no idea what he was going through now. Until that baby was out, there was a new Oliver, a deranged Oliver, and there were rules, which, at the moment, his sister was pissing all over.

"Looking for some company?"

Oliver turned his head and instantly tensed up. "Uh... yeah, I would love the company—but only if you want. I..."

Dan approached, holding a beer of his own. He sat next to his youngest, and the two sipped on their beers while staring at the void for a few silent minutes.

"What's that?"

Oliver frowned. "Sorry?"

Dan gestured at his phone with his beer. "You seem awfully preoccupied with that."

"It's nothing. It's..."

"Well, it isn't porn, so I don't see the need for secrecy."

"No, no secrecy. It's just... you would think I'm crazy."

"Try me."

"Okay. Um... it's a tracking app."

"Who are you tracking?"

"Ellie," he muttered oh so very quietly, feeling remarkably embarrassed at the moment.

"You're tracking Ellie?"

Oliver shook his head, blood mounting in his cheeks. "You wouldn't understand."

"Try me."

He sipped his beer, embarrassed by the need to explain, but also elated that his father was speaking to him. "I uh... I..." He shook his head, not sure of the best way to describe it. "I need to know where Ellie is. Like... always."

Dan swigged his beer, taking a good look at his son. "Why?"

"Because... what if she got into a car accident? What if she fainted? What if there was an emergency, and she needed me, but she was in no-reception area? I need to be on top of these things."

Dan took a moment to reflect. "Sounds reasonable enough."

"Right? She doesn't get it! Mom doesn't get it! Because they don't care if I worry, they don't care that I..."

"That you..."

Oliver clammed up. Some secrets are better left secrets.

"I hear from your mother that you stopped eating."

"That is ridiculous! I haven't stopped eating. I'm just... eating less."

"Either way, you look like you've lost more than a few pounds."

"A couple maybe, but I'm certainly not starving myself."

"Okay. What did you have for lunch?"

"I... like, today?"

"No, two weeks ago," Dan quipped.

Oliver polished his beer off and fretted his lip.

"Breakfast?"

"I wasn't hungry this morning."

"I can understand that. Yesterday then, what did you have for lunch? The day before that? A week before that?"

Oliver shook his head, boring into his phone. "I knew you wouldn't understand."

"Not for lack of trying. You said you were eating, and yet the evidence suggests otherwise."

"You think I've gone crazy, like Ellie and Mom? Is that it, Dad?"

"No, and neither do they. But there is a problem here, Oliver. It doesn't take a genius to see that."

Silence fell as the two resumed staring at the night.

"Dad?" Oliver uttered tentatively, his voice barely a whisper.

"Yeah?"

"Does this mean you're speaking to me again?"

"Depends."

"On?"

"On whether you're going to level with me."

Oliver took a moment to consider it. "If I do... will you speak to me?"

Dan sized up his little boy, his timid whispers unsettling him. "I will."

"Please don't say anything to Ellie about it; not to Mom, either. They can never know."

"You have my word."

Oliver sighed, and then sighed again, his eyes downcast. "Dad... I think I'm ill, like... in the head."

Dan shook his head, battling himself not hold his son. "Oliver, you're not ill; you're traumatized. There's a difference."

"I keep seeing her dying."

"Ellie?"

Oliver shook his head. "Bianca."

"What exactly do you see?"

"I see... I see her on the table, and there's blood everywhere, and... Michela is a baby again, and she's screaming and crying. And there's this voice, I don't know whose, scolding me for letting her die, saying it's all my fault... and I'm thinking that that voice may be right. And then she dies again, and again, and the screaming, and... it just doesn't stop."

"Is it a dream?"

Oliver nodded, can't bear to look at his father.

"Is that why you stopped sleeping?"

He nodded again, tears furrowing his cheeks. "I'm afraid to close my eyes, Dad..."

"Jesus Christ," his father sighed achingly and pulled him into his arms. "Come here."

Dan held his little boy as he wept in his arms, so very disturbed by his mental state. Even the way he cried disturbed him: silently, so repressed... aside from his eyes, all else was muted. His body didn't tremble. No sound was coming out of his mouth, either. He was completely turned off.

"Oliver," his father whispered a minute later.

"Yes, Dad?" Oliver whispered even more quietly, his voice devoid of any emotion, his body numb against him.

"I'm going to help you. Do you hear me? I'm going to pull you out of this. We'll fix you."

"Thank you, Dad. Thank you for speaking to me."

*

"Stay for supper, baby," Alice said as three stepped out of the car.

"What about Dad?"

"If he doesn't want to have supper with us, then it's his problem."

"I don't know, Mom. I don't think Oliver is in the mood. Definitely not for food."

"More the reason you should stay. It'll give me a chance to talk to him a little. I've got to find some way to help him."

"Why does Papi need help?"

Ellie took Michela's hand in hers as they mounted the stairs to the front door. "Because he forgot how to tie his shoelaces."

"But that's easy! I can teach him. I know how to tie my shoelaces."

"That's because you're amazing and special," her aunt cooed.

"And then maybe he won't be sad anymore."

Alice caressed the 5-year-old's cheek. "I'm sure he won't, baby."

The three girls entered the house, and from the kitchen, Ellie could see Dan holding his son out in the patio.

"Mom, look!"

Alice turned her head, and her eyes smiled as she looked outside.

She'd been putting relentless pressure on Dan to forgive Oliver, especially considering his deteriorating mental state. Her husband loved their baby boy, she knew. Loved him too much perhaps. Had it been Dave or Jack messing with Ellie, he might have never spoken to them. But just as she had a special connection with her daughter, Dan had been the same with Oliver. Their youngest had gotten away with a lot of shit his brothers never would have.

And when watching the two from the kitchen, she knew Oliver could get away with anything and everything now. What father could ever accept his son porking his daughter, his only daughter? Putting his baby inside her? None but her husband. And this was a done deal. Nothing they could say or do would tear Ellie from Oliver; their children had made that much clear. They could only shun them or accept them.

This was the lesser of two evils. Their daughter was carrying her brother's baby. She was too far gone with the pregnancy that terminating it now would be nothing short of murder. She would have his child, Alice knew, and there was nothing to be done about it. No non-dysfunctional family would ever wish such a thing on themselves, but when push comes to shove, you either adapt or you don't; there's no in between. Alice had chosen to adapt, and by the looks of it, her husband decided to do the same.

Ellie clutched her heart, tears forming in her catlike blue eyes. "Mom, oh my god..."

This was a milestone, a monumental achievement, nothing short of a miracle. Ellie had been trying to stay bullish for Oliver's sake, but she hadn't truly imagined their father ever forgiving her boyfriend. Daughters were something of sacred beings in their father's eyes, and her brother had crossed a line that precious few could come back from. It just made her appreciate him all the more. She always knew he was special, and now, there was no doubt in her mind.

She then treaded closer to the glass door leading to the patio, and she knew something wasn't right. It was the position the two were sitting in that warned her. Her father seemed awfully distraught, if that wasn't enough. Alice noticed that as well, as keen-eyed as she'd always been.

"Is Papi okay?"

"Michela, baby, don't go there." Alice clasped her arm. "Ellie, take her upstairs. I need to—"

"No, Mom. I need to."

Alice reluctantly bobbed her head. This would take some getting used to, her demoted status. She was second to Ellie when it came to Oliver; more like third, after her husband. It was still strange, but also very true.

"Come." She picked her granddaughter up. "What do you say we order Chinese takeout?"

Ellie waited for the two to climb up the stairs before she opened the door and stepped outside. Oliver instantly pulled himself together, listening to her pumps clacking closer behind his back.

"Daddy, can you please give me and Oliver a minute?"

Her father didn't want to, she could tell. He was considering it, stroking Oliver's arm. "We'll talk some more later, okay, son?"

Oliver jerked his head up and down, his back facing his sister.

Dan kissed his cheek, ruffling his hair lovingly as he did, before he walked to Ellie, who embraced him in tears.

"Daddy, you're amazing. The best father in the whole world. Thank you so much."

Dan sighed deeply as his arms tightened around his pregnant daughter. Only now had he processed the meaning of this moment. He kissed the top of her head and trudged inside, as if the significance weighed his steps down.

Ellie sat next to her boyfriend, who did his best to elude her eyes. She massaged his inner thigh. "Hon?"

He looked back, his eyes slightly red.

"Let's go for a ride."

***

At the lake—where they'd been a dozen times by now—on the hood of Dan's SUV, the blonde nestled in her brother's arms. Her head lay on his chest while her left arm belted his waistline, her left leg curling down his stomach. Her left breast and the swell of her belly claimed the rest of his abdomen. A light, genial breeze swished into her short yellow skirt, skimming the golden tan that ran the length of her legs on route to the immaculate curve of her bottom. The moon, three-quarters full, shone bright, worshiping the scarce freckles on her exposed left cheek. Indeed, summer had always been kind to Oliver's sister.

Michela and her grandparents would be dining alone. There were pressing matters to attend to, and Ellie knew she was also pressed for time. It was still early in the evening, but in just an hour, the lake would be swarming with horny teenagers parked everywhere, making the best of their Sumner break. There would be music and booze, and then the cops would rain down on their parade... Ellie could practically envision it.

"My love," she softly murmured, nuzzling his chest, "I want us to talk."

"Talk then."

Her brother sounded so remote as he gazed up at the stars. They hadn't uttered a single word since she extracted him from the house.

"I know you think I don't understand what you're going through, and in many ways, you're right, but in many ways, you're also wrong. I love you so much, Oliver, that I can feel you in my heart, I can feel your suffering, and it's unbearable. I want to ease your pain, but I can't do that when you're constantly shutting me out." When he remained silent, Ellie deeply sighed. "I wish you would just talk to me..."

"And say what?"

"Tell me about your fears, your pain, confide in me! I'm your sister, god damn it! Your lover, your partner... I want to help. "

"It's all under control."

"But it's not!" she murmured. "I've given in to your crazy demands, every one of them, but it doesn't get better, Oliver, does it? I always take your calls, even when I'm in meetings. I keep the GPS on, so you can track me on that stupid app. I see my doctor so much that his patients think I'm his wife. Baby, it's not working."

"It is what it is."

Ellie sighed and shuffled away from him.

Now it was Oliver's turn to sigh. "Baby?"

Ellie ignored him, her cheeks flushed in anger.

He rolled over to her, his head eclipsing the moonlight. "You say you understand me, what I'm going through, but you can't."

"Yes, I can! You're afraid, Oliver; it's okay to admit it. It doesn't make you weak; it makes you human!" She shook her head as she palmed his cheek. "Before you left, you weren't like this, this closed up; you trusted me, and I was nothing more than your sister then." Her eyes welled up, her hand falling from his cheek. "What am I doing wrong now?"

Oliver's chest heaved as he sighed, unable to bear seeing her in tears. "Baby, you're doing nothing wrong. You're so amazing and patient with me."

"Then please talk to me! Please, Oliver..."

Her brother slowly bobbed his head, his hand cupping her wet cheek. "I cannot afford to lose you. Do you understand me?"

"But, hon, you're not gonna lose me! You and I stick together, like white on rice. I'm not leaving you, ever! Not letting go of you, not in this life or the next. This?" She cupped her belly into his hand. "That's beautiful! That's our child in there! I'm gonna have this baby, and everything will be perfect! What happened to Bianca was tragic, no doubt, but it won't happen to me, Oliver. Believe me when I say this."

"You don't know that."

"I do know that! You wanna know how?"

"How?"

"Because I love you so fucking much that I won't allow it. I know almost nothing about Bianca, rest her soul, but I do know this: she was never meant for you, Oliver, because you were meant for me." She pulled his neck down and kissed his lips again and again, passionately, loudly. "My baby, the love of my life... you were meant for me, just as I was meant for you. And this I feel so deep inside of me, Oliver."

He teared up. "You do?"

"So deep.... it's you and me, always and forever. Once you believe in it as hard as I do, all your fears will fade away. I could pop a hundred of your babies out of me, one after the other, and no harm would come to me. Trust in me, Oliver... trust in us."

Oliver laid his forehead on hers, tears trickling down his cheeks, maybe for the first time in front of his sister. "I want to. I do. I... I..."

Ellie parted her legs and pulled him down onto her, all of him, as her blue eyes succumbed to the moment, as well. She kissed his tears, his lips, and he soon mirrored her, sucking her salty tears, her pouty lips, lapping her nimble tongue. The more they touched and kissed the more he gave himself to her, and his sister was taking, plowing her way in. She finally breached his defenses, and she was not going to squander this opportunity, and she was not going to slow down.

And she was making headway, through brute force and a kiss so passionate; not one of hunger, but one driven from need and love. They twined and swirled, their saliva slapping together, mingling, passing from tongue to tongue before sliding down one throat and then another. Cradled between her legs, Oliver massaged her tongue with his, his pelvis rocking back and forth against her, almost absently.

His sister's slight hips promptly met his rhythm as they ground and pawed, their kiss seemingly self-sustained now. Ellie's fingers trailed down her brother's sides until reaching into his waistbands. She pulled down without thinking, her mind lost in this tongue-feeding frenzy. Oliver's butt came to view, bathing in the moonlight, his cock curved up and fully grown. Spooning his big sister's bulging belly, he hiked up her skirt and ripped her panties off like he had done so many times before.

Ellie gasped into his kiss, the gentle wind soaring her slit before glancing off her bare, moist folds. It felt wonderful, this summer breeze caressing the threshold of her salivating sex, loving her, prepping her. Her baby bro blocked that draft quickly though, fastening his dick between a pair of puffy lips. This felt infinitely better to Ellie, the warmth of a young, plump cock, hard with lust, towering against her snug opening.

They ground, his rod snuggling deeper within his sister's cleft. Breaking from his lips, Ellie arched her head and bit back a moan, her button rolling and swelling against the succulent dome while the shaft bobbed. Oliver sealed her lips with his, his hand caressing her smooth, shapely hip. He traced the curve of her ass to cup her left globe that molded perfectly into his palm. His squeezed and fondled, reveling in the tight, ridiculously rounded form.

Pregnant or not, his sister was such a hot, slim package. If he kept holding onto that muscular orb, he would ejaculate in seconds. So he released and visited her the swell of her hip again, nibbling her lip as he continued humping her bloated labia. The blonde moaned as he tugged at her lip, and then moaned again, her pussy steaming like a hot, wet sauna. She could feel her lubricants simmering, bubbling, as the cock-head pushed up against her beet-red clitoris.

Her hands sloped down her brother's back and clenched on his toned cheeks. She massaged them before bobbing, helping the wet shaft glide up the portal of her womanhood. She fretted her lip and released a low, guttural cry of sex behind the straightness of perfect white teeth. She was revving, her clit singing, her channel growing hotter and wetter, as his member kept spearing her lips. Those vaginal flaps, so patted, so damp, hugging him, rubbing him, pulling on him.

She kissed her little brother as deep as she could, her hands working him into a quicker pace. Her little button was enraged, engorged and flushed, dipping in the pre-coital fluids oozing from Oliver's piss slit. Mad with lust, Ellie gave a high-pitched whimper, so conflicted whether to culminate. This wonderful torture that every woman can sympathize with, the feeling of utter emptiness, the desire—no, the need to devour a fresh, hard cock up her flower.

Their baby turned in the blonde, then turned again, as a soft moan tumbled from her mouth down her brother's throat. Her mind was made up. Her legs drifted farther apart, her hands working his ass faster, mashing him to her. Her helpless nub started pulsing, sprinkled with viscous beads derived from her brother's cock-head. She would come this way, then take him inside her, and come again.

Their tongues wrestled in the open air, their slobbery tips lapping clockwise. Ellie released Oliver's butt and cradled his nut sack while he moved harder between her splayed-out legs. Those long, slender legs jerked around him, her glistening marble on the brink of explosion, so stimulated against the massive, juicy dome. She released his tongue and rasped a moaned, her stunning face wincing with sex. A big swing up her wet slit later, and she tensed up, her mouth agape.

Oliver undulated slowly up her shaved sex, loving the orgasm sweeping over her needy blue eyes, the strain in her whines as they fought out of her sweet mouth, the way she tried to arch herself while floating high up in the golden skies, millions of miles off the ground. He studied his cresting sister like one studies the Mona Lisa, burning this image of her into his eyes, an image only a year ago he couldn't have dreamed of ever witnessing.

And Ellie was loving it, the feeling of him grinding slowly yet purposely against her bare, leaking sex, her button quaking in a pool of manly pre-cum. She loved how his eyes were so focused as they sloped down her impossible frame, learning the way she curved and strained underneath him, the way she still massaged his brimming balls in her feminine hand.