All Comments on 'The Twelve Zenati Pt. 16'

Yes! The whole dynamic. There might not be any sex in this chapter, but perfectly executed character and story building! Patiently-anxiously awaiting up coming adventure and second chances! Good job!

Marcella aka Stevie is still tying Noah in knots. Although her trying to top him has about as much chance of succeeding as a lead balloon flying. Thanks for another great chapter.

Finally to the part I have been long waiting for

First of all, I'd just like to say what a good chapter this was. The story is brilliant, from the fully fleshed out characters, to the beautifully flowing writing style that is just so smooth and enjoyable to read.

But ... I'm team Marcella all the way!

The only person other than her who I have any time for this chapter is Gideon, and he gets immediately chewed out for his behaviour. He really was the only reasonable voice out of them all. Genesis finally had a moment of realization (late though it might be), and Olivia owned up to her actions to some extent. At this point I think Genesis and Olivia are made for each other, and not in the good way. Vivianne is nice though (when she isn't siding with the tables), as are the side characters, just the main brothers often come off jerk-ish at times.

Noah, meanwhile, is awful! I honestly hope he doesn't get Marcella with how dreadfully he has treat her throughout the story. He has sided against her every moment, and been insulting and aggressive the whole time. Especially the breaking into her room and groping her at the end of this entry, it makes him come off worse than Apollo!

Marecella deserves better ^_^

In terms of actual criticism (as all the above is just my opinion on characters), I have absolutely none, this story is one of the best by far. Love your work as always, and keep up the great work!

5/5 stars

You have such a flair for writing. Great story and characters. Love the development of Noah and Marcella. We all patiently await the next chapters.

So seriously, you write sex scenes like no other. But you could take all the sex out of this novel - using innuendo and suggestion instead - and have the most incredible story of family, relationships, hurt, healing, love, hate and forgiveness. Your story reflects life in that no "good guy" is truly just good, and no "villian" is just evil. As individuals we all experience so much that other people are not privy to, and these experiences work together - the good and the bad - to shape us. While Marcella may not want to share all that has happened, it certainly makes it easier for Noah and his family to understand. I can certainly understand Olivia's reluctance to share her role in Marcella's story, and honestly am having a hard time finding compassion for her. This is so well written, and a joy to read. Thank you for sharing your writing talent. Looking forward to the next chapter in this saga.

What a great chapter Ellie! Can only agree with the realism of the family dynamics and relationships made in a previous comment.

What deepens the quality of your writing here as well, I believe, is the way Noah's brothers are made to see that what they thought they were doing to support him was actually neither supportive nor what Noah needed at this point.

Thank you,

Jules

Waiting for the next installment is always so hard because you make the characters and relationship dynamics so compelling. I can wait to see where this goes next and sincerely hope the next chapter picks up in the exact moment this one ended. I'm sure whatever you write will be brilliant!

This is the first time that this story makes me sad. Why had Noah to be so smug instead of respectfull. Why do you think Marcella would like that? It makes me sad that when finally there is a strong woman in you're story, you make her weak because the man has to be the Alpha, the dominant one and the woman must give in because she can't take care off herself, like Peri and Cat, she needs a man to take care off her. And Why is Noah angry with her because she would not listen to him? He never listened to her. Sad, because I really liked Marcella, she was so different from Peri and Cat. I had so much admiration for you that you could create so much different personalities without compromising the main storyline.

@Anonymous, maybe you should write your own story so you can stop complaining about this one!

She has been running because she was scared and all Noah can do is think with his dick, instead of making his excuses. And that While he is an Oracle. Like this story has two different writers. One writer is really good with emotions and believable characters and one that is not so experienced. Till this moment Marcella was completely believable, it is a shame.

WTAF Anon ? Children aren’t supposed to be on this website, if I confused you then how about a straight forward - grow up. Different people enjoy different things if we all liked the same thing we’d be bloody sheep.

The storyline is as always bloody fantastic, reading it is honestly pretty voyeuristic it’s that vivid.

I find myself agreeing with the 2 Anons who were saddened by the turn of events. Noah is trying to put things right but yes he is being a prick as he does it. That said they’ve had an ongoing snarky connection sniping at each other as well as mildly flirty. Which is why I think the author was aiming for - snarky and flirty that is.

Vivienne has been dropped in the shit again, although she seemed to have had a personality transplant the minute she got married. The Vivienne we met at the start would NEVER have breached patient confidentiality that’s a mal practice suit waiting to happen. It’s bizarre to think that a doctor would fuck up that badly. She should have spoken directly to her husband and Noah about her concerns. No specific details but explain that she believed that Marcella had been abused by her father and the family doctor and that she’d been sent to the Battaglia under false pretences. No doctor in their right mind would blatantly disregard the Hippocratic oath the way she’s suppose to have done by writing the report. Then again why would they believe her she’s only a woman??

It’s coming across a bit like an alternate version of The Handmaids Tale. Is Marcella’s personality going to change too? The there’s Olivia, one minute she made leaps and bounds in her recovery and the next she’s a petulant child.

Tess (UK)