The Whipping Girl

Only when I lie down on it next to her and gently take the pillow from her hands does she look at me, her eyes wide as saucers. "Did I die?" she breathes, mystified.

My smile bunches my cheeks, and I lay down, carefully collecting her in my arms to cuddle. "No, you're fine."

Her hands clutch at my dress as she buries her feverish face against my shoulder and neck. "That felt so amazing. I've never... I..." She whines, unable to express herself, and growing frustrated. "I want to do that again."

I can't help but chuckle. "Right now?"

Moira blinks, then crawls over me, looking down into my eyes. "Oh no, not right now. But sometime soon. Very soon. Was that sex?"

I nibble my lip and nod.

"Am I not a virgin anymore, then?" she asks, nervously.

My eyes roll up, and I sigh. "Your maidenhead is still there, Moira - I didn't take it. You paid absolutely no attention to our tutor's anatomy lessons, did you?"

She pouts and shakes her head. "I was... just so embarrassed, Aveline."

Out of pity I caress her cheek, and she tilts her head into it. The way the celestial light catches on her dark hair is enchanting, and I think of how she will make someone a beautiful wife someday. Yet I feel a knot in my stomach. If she marries, she'll move away to be with him. I won't see her anymore. My arms wrap around her suddenly and pull her down to me, and I hide my face in her hair.

Moira's startled, but she relaxes on top of me. "Are you alright, Aveline?"

I nod, lying, but then I hug her tighter, not caring that it might hurt and distract her. She does squirm a little, but she does nothing more than that, waiting patiently for me to speak.

In time, I finally do. "What if you get married, or I get married, and we never see each other again? I don't want to be apart from you. I'll miss you terribly" I moan into her hair.

"Couldn't I be your lady in waiting?" Her head lifts and she looks down at me seriously, shrugging a shoulder delicately. "I always thought that was my role anyway. Do you think I will be married off?"

I hate that this coil of fear and anxiety has taken the place of such a miraculous thing between us. "I don't know. I guess it's up to father. Perhaps I should speak with him. There are a few suitors he has lined up, and I've been putting off meeting them." Very carefully I prop myself up onto an elbow, bringing my face close to hers. "Let's meet them together, and see if there's one who we both like. I would never marry a man who's mean to you."

Moira smiles. "Yes. Yes, I would like that very much."

Then it's settled. Once father comes back from his trip in a few weeks, I'll consult him about my marriage. But that's later. I'll worry about sneaking out of Moira's room tomorrow morning, because now I guide Moira back down to cuddle with me. She slips out of her robe and I slip out of my dress, and somehow we do manage to get to sleep, in spite of our wandering hands.