All Comments on 'The Young Widow Ch. 06'

I'm glad to see you are continuing with this story, I love reading it. Hope to read more soon.

I liked this story immensely. Very steamy. However, you really need to be more careful with the characters' names. You mistakenly referred to Lori as "Jen" several times in this chapter.

While I could quibble about some editing, it is a wonderful story and I do hope you continue.

Great story but ended too quick. Suggest the next chapter about Lori and Jen. Also, a three-some chapter. Keep up the good work.

You have developed a great story line with truly outstanding potential for many segements. I only hope you do not get bored or suffer writers block and let this story die an untimely death!!!!

Would it be asking too much, to put a disclaimer at the beginning of each of your stories, warning all those that choose to attempt to wade through the countless land mines of misspelled words and countless times, you lose track, of exactly whom is fucking whom, or whom is talking to whom. Fuckkkkkkkkkkkkk

Sooooooooooo, what ever you are smoking, during your so called " time of self indulgence" put it down and pull your head out of your ass and pay attention, to the task at hand.............as in keeping the fucking story straight.

Would that be asking too much..................other wise, print your disclaimer, at the beginning, telling all, that you are a complete dumb-ass and don't bother reading your half-assed attempt, at winning the "Pulitzer Prize".

dear flman, please do not allow the ultracrepidarians that fulminate all over the internet, to discourage you from continuing to create and post your writings.

It is unfortunate that the Literotica site attracts these socially maladroit anonymousie trolls, spewing their venomous scribblings from their mommy's basements where they have been hiding out for the last forty years. Like giant slugs creeping around in the dark, spewing their slime at anyone brave enough to publish.

As for errors of spelling and grammar and continuity, actually some of the errors can be amusing in or out of context. I am well use to trying to decipher and interpret letters and journals from the last few centuries. Most writers, historically, would rarely spell the same word the same way twice, on the same page.

The problem authors have with Literotica and many other sites across the Web

are a combination of trying to coordinate and collate data from a titanic multitude of sources. Conflicting versions of OS's, wordprocessor programs, communication protocols, programming languages, etc. Almost none of which interface smoothly {if at all!} even within the same product lines. It is practically a supra-natural miracle that this Rube Goldberg mishmash of stampeding technologies ever manages to work at all.

Great story. The plotting is good and you are developing the characters well. I look forward to reading the next chapters .

I am not one of the grammar Nazi but the name mix ups did get confusing at times. I have two suggestions. (1) After you have finished a story, set it aside for several days or weeks and then read it slowly and carefully. I feel sure you have caught the mistaken identities of the characters and other errors. (2) There is a section of Literotica that lists individuals who will proof read your stories. Don't be embarrassed to ask for editing. Even the authors that constantly have #1 books on the best seller list have editors.

Keep up the good work.

You had Jen go off to have a shower and go to bed. Then she's with Anne and Lori when Lori discloses what she had seen the night she watched Jen and Anne. At one point you had Anne take Jen's hand and stand up facing her. In the next paragraph Anne is kissing Lori. - It's only on the 1st page I think.