by Ann Douglas
I liked the story as a Star Trek fan. And thank you for setting it in the REAL Star Trek universe and not the crap from JJ Abrams. However, you have Demora crying out in Chinese when Hikaru Sulu is Japanese.
In the Star Trek novel "The Captain's Daughter", Demora is said to be the daughter of Ling Sui. aka Susan Ling, and was raised by her mother until she was six . Ling is a Chinese name so I took Demora to be the daughter of Chinese-Japanese parents, hence her use of Chinese.